What are the classic jokes and catchphrases of the driving school master?

Everyone will be painful and happy when they recall the experience of driving test! When there are mistakes in driving practice, the coach will say it like a primary school student, but in order to alleviate some tension, the coach will occasionally blurt out many jokes that make people laugh.

Let's see what funny jokes and phrases comedians who are delayed by their coaching career will make! If there are any shortcomings, please comment and add.

Mantra series 1. "Get off Zhuge Liang and get on the bus like a pig."

This sentence may be the most authentic evaluation of many people who have just been trained by lovely coaches.

2. "Let another coach teach you. My heart is not good and I can't stand such a toss. "

3. Coach: Will you relax? Why have you been holding the steering wheel and trying to take it home?

Coach: Why are you driving so fast? Always tell me if you stole a car!

5. The cars are all on the roadside lawn. Do you think this is the Inner Mongolia prairie? Why are you riding a horse?

Duanzi series 1. Coach: Aren't you afraid?

Me: I'm not afraid!

Coach: I'm afraid.

2. Coach: See anyone in front?

Me: Yes.

Coach: Speed up, step on the gas pedal and go all out.

Me: Ah, well, I dare not.

Coach: Then brake quickly!

3. Me: Coach, am I driving a little crooked?

Coach: You drive straight. You should have a crooked road.

4. Coach: Why do you always step on the accelerator? You spend all your RMB on gasoline and make cars fart.

5. I accidentally hung up the third gear when I started. After Panasonic left, the car suddenly jumped in front of the coach who was chatting in front. The coach said: I only said two words about you, so what? Still want to kill someone?

6. Me: I'm so nervous, coach. I'm a little scared to practice driving on the road.

Coach: What are you afraid of? What you should be afraid of is the people on the road and the cars driving.

7. A female student backed into the warehouse, wasting a long time without backing into the warehouse.

Coach: Come on, come on, everybody get off.

Female student: Coach, why did you get off? Now is not the time to rest.

Coach: Let's move this car into the garage together.

8. Coach: Can you drive with the steering wheel firmly? Is it because our car burns alcohol instead of gasoline, or are you drunk?

Well, that's all I can think of. I hope everyone will leave a lot of messages and share those funny jokes in the process of learning to drive.

There is a piece of meat on the steering wheel, and the dog drives better than you! 1. Stop ~ Stop when you say it. Is this your home? Ah, it stopped in front of someone's house, didn't you see it?

Coach: I said, back up and look in the rearview mirror. Where are you looking?

Student: I'm used to it.

Coach: People who come to learn driving are used to it, so don't pretend to be garlic.

Coach: Which did you hit on the road, a man or a dog?

Student: Hit the dog.

Coach: You hit your head. You have to brake!

Learning to drive is too dangerous. Isn't it good to ride a bike?

Girl, I got my driver's license. Take the coach's advice and go home and find a locker to lock it up. This is a souvenir.

Before I became a coach, I used to run a go-kart amusement park. You can pretend anything you want, but you must pay for the car accident.

7. What are you nervous about? It's passers-by who should be nervous when you drive!

8. It's not that you drive crooked, it's that the road is crooked!

9. There is a piece of meat on the steering wheel, and the dog drives better than you!

10. The red light can't pass, and neither can the green light. Do you have a color you like?

1 1. The teacher forgot to bring cigarettes today. Go and buy a pack.

12. Wait, I'll find another coach to teach you. He is old and not afraid of death. I am still young.

13. You college students, what's the use of such a high degree? You can't even drive well! I can't count one lap or two.

14. Why are you driving so fast? Did you steal this car?

15. Just honk the horn and ignore the brakes. Will you tell them "Hey, I'm going to kill you"?

The mantra is basically some swearing words, no matter what provocation, you can't remember it without swearing.

In fact, I want to talk about this topic like this: the form of education in China has been reversed, and students should know right and wrong, but they should not beat and scold; Adults should be relatively respected for paying for driving licenses, but they are scolded for being beaten (I have seen beaten students).

Don't you think this phenomenon is unreasonable? !