Joke Collection Website - Cold jokes - A classical Chinese man and his son play the role of father.
A classical Chinese man and his son play the role of father.
Liu Yin, who wants to go to Danyang, is really long, and his fellow villagers and people who have been to him laugh at him. Zhang Ping finally visited Liu Zhenchang. At this moment, Serina Liu was cleaning up some mistakes and dealing with some affairs, so he was arranged to the next seat, just greeting him and not paying attention to him.
Zhang Ping wants to start a conversation by himself, but he can't find a topic. Soon, celebrities such as Wang Meng with a long history came to make it clear. When there is something that can't be communicated between the host and the guest, Zhang Ping analyzes and judges them from the bottom seat. His words were concise and profound, and he could clearly express the other party's thoughts, which surprised everyone.
Mayor Liu sat him at the top of the table and talked with him all day. So he stayed all night.
The next day, when Zhang Ping left, Serina Liu said, "Go back for a while and I'll invite you to play in Fujun." When Zhang Ping returned to the boat, his companion asked him where to spend the night. Zhang Pingxiao smiled and didn't answer.
In a short time, Serina Liu sent county officials to find Zhang Xiaolian's boat, which surprised his companions. Mayor Liu immediately rode with him to see Jun Fu.
Arriving at the gate, Liu Zhenchang went in first and said to Jun Fu, "Xiaguan has found the best doctor for you today." After Zhang Ping entered the meeting, Jun Fu talked with him. He couldn't help admiring, repeatedly calling it yes, and said, "Zhang Ping is brilliant, which is the place where justice is reformed."
So he was appointed as Doctor Tai Chang.
2. Seeking classical Chinese translation:: Bi Zaiyu, father Jin Bi Zaiyu, real name Deqing, Yanzhou. His father, Jin Bi, followed Yue Fei to guard the royal cemetery during the Jian Yan years, and moved between Jianghuai and gradually rose to Doctor Wuyi. Once again, I met a kind-hearted official who was attached to the Guards Division (abbreviated as the Commander-in-Chief Division of both Guards and Ma Jun) and was a martial arts superman. Song Xiaozong summoned him, was very happy to see him, and gave him a shirt and money.
In the second year of the jubilee, the emperor sent a letter to the Northern Expedition, asking the abbot Guo Ni to surrender Shandong and JD.COM, and sent Bi Zaiyu and Chen Xiaoqing to attack Sizhou. Bi Zaiyu asked to choose the newly recruited army that is not afraid of death as a pioneer, and Guo Ni gave him eighty-seven men. The zhaofu division marched in a limited time. When Jin people heard about it, they closed the border trade market and blocked the city gate to get ready. Bi Zaiyu said: "The enemy already knows when we will send more troops. If the soldiers are surprised, they should attack one day in advance and take them by surprise. " Chen Xiaoqing agreed with his idea. Bi Zaiyu rewarded soldiers, encouraged them with loyalty, and sent his troops near Sizhou City. Yizhou has two cities, East and West. Bi Zaiyu had his weapons, flags and ships put under the stone chariot, pretending to attack Xicheng, but he personally led his men from Yishan to the south of Dongcheng, first boarding the city and killing hundreds of enemies. The Jin people were defeated, and the defenders fled by opening the north gate. Xicheng was still holding on, and Bi shouted at Yuju Banner: "General Da Songbi is coming. You are all from the Central Plains. Surrender quickly. " Soon, a county magistrate in Hu Aiping came down from the city with a rope and demanded surrender, so both cities were conquered. Guo Ni came to reward the soldiers, took out the secretariat tablet awarded by the emperor and awarded it to Bi Zaiyu. When he was rejected, he said, "Eighty-one states have fallen to the south of the Yellow River. Now that we have captured the two cities of Yizhou, we will get a historical secretariat. What will you get as a reward if this goes on? " Besides, how many imperial dental cards did you take? "Resolutely refuses to accept. Soon, he was appointed as a health official.
Guo Ni sent Li Ruyi and Guo Zhuo to attack Suzhou and Chen Xiaoqing as backup. Bi Zaiyu was ordered to attack Xuzhou with 480 cavalry as the vanguard. When he arrived, Guo and Li's soldiers were injured and defeated. He asked them and replied, "There is a flood at the gate of Suzhou, and our army is not good. Tian Jun Mai has been captured by the enemy. " Bi Zaiyu led the troops in an emergency and stationed in Lingbi. When Chen Xiaoqing is stationed in Phoenix Mountain, he will come back with his army. Bi Zaiyu said, "Although Suzhou has not won, the victory or defeat of a military commander is uncertain. How can we defeat his spirit so quickly? I was ordered by Zhaofu to attack Xuzhou. I would rather die outside the north gate of Lingbi than outside the south gate. " As it happens, Guo Ni wrote a letter to Chen Xiaoqing asking him to withdraw his troops. Bi Zaiyu said, "When Guo and Li are defeated, the enemy will pursue them. We should ambush them. " 8 jin j indeed as expected with five thousand cavalry pursuit in two ways, and let the death squads twenty people guard the north gate of Lingbi, led the troops into the array. When Jin saw the military flag, he shouted, "General Bi is here." . So I ran away. My armies left Lingbi, but Bi Zaiyu stayed alone. It is estimated that the army walked more than twenty miles and burned Lingbi. The generals asked him, "No ignition at night, but ignition during the day today. Why? " When we met again, I said, "I can see the reality at night, but I can't see the smoke during the day." They have been defeated and dare not catch up, so the army can March safely without danger. Where do you know that the army is easy to advance and difficult to retreat? "
Seventy thousand nomads were stationed at the gates of Chuzhou, three thousand people were guarding Huaiyin to transport grain, and ships carrying three thousand grains were moored at Daqing River. The plan also said: "The enemy is ten times as big as our army, so it is difficult to win by force, so it is defeated by power." So he sent Xu Jun, the commander of the army, to Huaiyin. At night, he arrived at the enemy camp at the second watch, each with a fire, and landed in 50 grain stores, listening to the whistle to light the fire. The enemy fled in a hurry and captured 23 people, including Wu Gulun Xerox and Pucha Yuannu. Ten years after Jiading, he resigned as the ambassador to Wu Xinjun. He was seventy when he died. He was made Qiu, and later he was made a Taishi, posthumous title.
3. Song Zhaonan Zhong Kui's father's original classical Chinese: "Zhao Ben Hui You"
Song's father, Ning Zongshi, was the envoy of Jinghu Lake. Every time Kwai hears the alarm, she goes out with the generals, and when she meets the enemy, she narrowly escapes. The generals were afraid of losing control, tried their best to save them, and won many battles. One day, the soldiers will be rewarded and the soldiers will change. Kwai was twelve or thirteen years old, and when she realized it, she cried and said, This was given to me by the imperial court, and there is no other reward for our company. The morale of the army depends on it, and people are very alert.
Translation:
Zhao Kui, a native of Song Dynasty, was the son of Zhao Fang, the envoy of Jinghu Lake. Every time Zhao Kui heard the bugle call, he went out with the generals, and when he met the enemy, he narrowly escaped death. The generals were afraid of losing the commander-in-chief's son and tried their best to save them, thus winning many times. One day, Zhao Fang rewarded the soldiers, but this kindness could not compensate for the credit, and the soldiers wanted to launch a rebellion. At that time, Zhao Kui was only twelve or thirteen years old. Realizing this, he quickly shouted: "This is a reward from the imperial court, and there are other rewards from our purchasing department." This sentence has stabilized the morale of the army, and people admire his cleverness.
4. Master Jiang recognizes his father's translation. There is a master Jiang in Shu whose name has been lost. He is from Xu Tian (now Xutian Town, Xuchang City, Henan Province). When I was a child, I was taken away by the Yellow Scarf Army and lost contact with my parents.
He fought side by side with his predecessor (referring to Wang Jian, the former leader of the Five Dynasties Shu State) and made many brilliant achievements. Later, he succeeded in the history of several towns, and he was an official until he was a teacher.
Master Jiang has an old groom named Jiang who has been feeding horses for decades. Every time Master Jiang enters the stable, he finds that the groom has a small problem and will definitely whip him. It has been like this for many years, and the number of whipping adds up to almost a hundred times. Later, the old man surnamed Jiang could not bear to be whipped and cried and begged his wife to let him go back to his hometown. The lady asked, "Where are you from?" Answer: "It's Xu Tian." The lady asked, "Are there any children at home?" A: "I had a wife and a son when I was robbed, and I still don't know where to go." The wife asked her son's nickname, his wife's ranking among brothers and sisters, and the closest relatives in the family, and the old man answered them one by one. After Master Jiang came home, his wife told him about the old man's request to go home and asked the names of relatives who had lost contact with him. Master Jiang was very surprised and suspected that the old man surnamed Jiang was his father. He was asked in detail what marks he had on the lost boy. The old man said, "My son has a black spot on the soles of his feet, and I don't remember the rest."
Jiang Taizu burst into tears, secretly sent someone to send the old man outside the sword gate, and then told the old master, "My father will come from Kanto these days." So he gave money and goods to the old man, changed his clothes and sent a car to take him into Master Jiang's house. Father and son reconciled. Master Jiang gave alms to tens of thousands of monks to make up for whipping his father, and never whipped believers again in his life.
Huang's father Huang's father came home one afternoon three days ago. At that time, nobody was at home. He put down his backpack and squatted at the door to smoke cotyledons.
The old lady upstairs thought she was a tramp and scolded him to go away. When I asked my father about it, he rubbed his hands clumsily like a child who made a mistake. His eyes wandered and he murmured, "Next time, I must dress appropriately."
The house is not spacious, so we put our father and son in one room. Soon after my father entered the room, I heard a slap in the face. As soon as I opened the door, I saw my son make a hullabaloo about: "You are dirty, you are dirty, don't kiss me, get out."
I was very violent to my son, and my wife gave me a glare. Father stood by with his hands hanging down, and that night he heard his father tossing and turning.
The next morning, the wife explained to her father in an unfriendly tone: "There are good cigarettes and ashtrays on the coffee table. Do not smoke the cotyledons and shake the ash. Don't move the stereo, gas cooker, refrigerator, TV ... "Father said humbly," If you ask me to move, I can't move. "
When I came back at noon, I saw water all over the floor. Father squatted on the ground, handkerchief in hand, scrambling to clean the floor. The wife walked into the bedroom of cutting and slammed the door.
My father was at a loss as if he had done something wrong. It was raining lightly in the afternoon, and I didn't see my father when I came back from work.
When my father came back, his wet hair rested on his wrinkled forehead and he was carrying a plastic bag like pine bark in his hand. He entered the room without taking off his shoes, and his wife snorted and went into the bedroom again.
Father said, "I went shopping. I don't know what you missed, so I want to buy these. " Father said: "honey cures stomach trouble, remember, drink a spoonful every morning and evening."
She is a brain eater. Walnut powder supplements the brain, and the grandson has a bad appetite and is thin, so he bought him a spleen-strengthening cake and an appetizer. "My father finally took out a plastic bag from his close-fitting pocket and said," I saved this 5,000 yuan for selling chickens and pigs for three years.
I'm useless. You need to get married and have children. Take it. I will go back tomorrow. Come again sometime. Look at the grave and your grandfather's grave. I don't blame you if I don't have time to come back. You are busy, the unit has discipline! "Say that finish, my father smiled and took out the smoke from the cotyledons, which was just lit. He may have remembered his wife's explanation and put it back.
Father insisted on leaving. I can't stay, so I decided to call a taxi to take him back.
My father has never been in a car in his life. He knows how to open the car door. His hand touched the door and he looked embarrassed. I stepped forward, bent down, opened the car door, waited on my father to get on the bus, and then closed the car door for him.
My father sticks his head out and looks happy. He said, "Son, Dad is the luckiest person in the village." Say that finish, raised my hand and wiped my eyes, and looked at me with a simple smile. I immediately had mixed feelings.
Living in the world, living in the city and living in the officialdom, I have bent over in front of many people and opened the car door for many people, but I have never bent over to open the car door for my father. My father is a farmer, I am a cadre, my father is a farmer, and I am a city dweller. Father has never surpassed our height in his life, but today we rely on his foundation.
My father bent for us all his life, suffered all his life and cared for us all his life. When people are old, they still don't forget to share their worries for their children and grandchildren. But what about us? After giving them so much disrespect, just opening the car door for him once made him satisfied and burst into tears.
That bend is filial piety and conscience to my father. For me, this is a begging and deep respect for you and all fathers like you in the world.
6. Chen Wannian's father and son, Chen Wannian's adopted son, flattery.
After being ill for thousands of years, I was told to go under the bed, chat until midnight, sleep salty and touch my head on the screen. He has been angry for ten thousand years and wants to fight. He said, "The Catholic Church warned you, but you slept instead of listening to me. Why? " He knelt down and kowtowed and said, "I fully understand what you said. The main idea is to teach me to kiss the boss's ass! " ! "Chen Wannian didn't speak again.
Selected from The Biography of Chen Han in Ten Thousand Years.
Chen Wannian was ill and called his son Chen Xian to bed. Teach him to read until midnight. Chen Xian took a nap and hit his head on the screen. Chen Wannian was so angry that he wanted to hit him with a stick and reprimanded him: "I always told you, but you went to sleep and didn't listen to me. Why? " Chen Xian quickly knelt down and kowtowed and said, "I know what Dad said. I probably taught my son to kiss up to the boss and please him. That's all! " Chen Wannian didn't speak again.
7. Xiao and his son read the answer Xiao and his son read the answer 19. Please outline the story of the novel. (3 points) 20. What are the personalities of "Dad" and Chen Shuangxi in the text? (4 points) 2 1. How to understand the underlined sentence "Don't worry, son, this broom won't lose your face"? (3 points) 22. This paper depicts the image of "dad" by contrast, please give an example for specific analysis. (4 points) 23. This paper pays attention to detail description, please combine one of them to talk about its role in portraying characters. (3 points) 24. Did "Dad" only leave 60 yuan and a broom? Please talk about your feelings. (3 points) 19. Summarize the story of the novel (3 points): Father came to school to see double happiness; Shuangxi arranged for his father to watch a movie for the party; Double happiness refused to accept the broom, and his father was angry; Double happiness is coming. 20.(4 points) "Dad": hardworking, kind, thrifty, loving his son, understanding and teaching his son well. (2 points) Chen Shuangxi: Love father, be vain, and be able to correct mistakes (2 points) 2 1. (3 points) Key point: Essentially, he won't embarrass his son. It is pointed out that the role of contrast in characterization is 2.23. (3) Point out that the detail description is 1, and write the role of 2.24. (3) Focus: (1) Carry forward the virtues of parents; (2) Cherish the love of parents; (3) Be kind to parents' love; (4) Learn to be grateful (other reasonable feelings can also be given points) Agree with 62| Comment (30).
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