Homophonic joke story

The story describes it as an abnormal phenomenon on the basis of realistic cognitive view. It is a literary genre, focusing on the description of the development process of events. It emphasizes the vividness and coherence of the plot and is more suitable for oral narration. What happened. Or imagine a story. The following is a homophonic joke story I collected for you. Welcome to learn from them, I hope it will help you.

Homophonic joke story 1 A unit leader loves to drink. Once he drank too much at a public banquet and passed out on the spot. A man played a eulogy and said, "You are a great man, and your stomach has been tested by alcohol." . You are in a bad mood. You have experienced the battle of drinking (lasting) and participated in the battle of filling your stomach (defending your title), but I didn't expect that you didn't wake up as if you were dead (fortunately) after the ninth (China) alcohol and tobacco (research) conference in the wine industry.

A county magistrate with a strong accent went to the village to make a report:

"Rabbit, shrimp, pig tail! No pickles, pickles are too expensive! ! "

Attention, comrades and villagers! Stop talking and have a meeting now! ! )

After the county magistrate finished speaking, the host said, "Please give me sausages and pickles!"

Now, please talk to the township head! )

The township head said, "Rabbit, the dog ate today's meal, and everyone is a big jerk!" "

Comrades, that's enough for today. Let's make a big bowl! )

Taoyuan dialect is very strange and has a high ending. For example, "ju" is pronounced "pig".

Go to the propaganda department of the county party Committee first and contact the personnel bureau for an interview. The propaganda department called me to make an appointment and put me on speakerphone.

Propaganda Department: "Hello, are you a pig? (Personnel Bureau) "

The other party: "No, you are mistaken. I am not a person but a pig (Personnel Bureau), and my mother is a pig (Grain Bureau). "

I tried to hold back my laughter and my stomach hurt.

The next day, I attended the briefing of the county government. Roll call before the meeting.

Moderator: "Which units have arrived?"

So the participants signed up one by one:

"I am a wild boar (Public Security Bureau)."

"My name is Pig (Education Bureau)."

"I am a pig (post office)."

"I am a typical pig (telecommunications bureau)

On the bus, a man and a woman collided because of the crowd. The woman turned back and said, "Are you sick?" The man felt puzzled and replied, "Do you have any medicine?" The people in the car snickered! The woman felt very angry and replied, "Are you mentally ill?" The man said coldly, "Can it be cured?" The whole car is hilarious! The bus driver stopped and laughed at the steering wheel.

A high school boy called his girlfriend in the middle of the night to fall in love.

Unfortunately, the girl's mother received it. After asking the purpose, my girlfriend's mother was very unhappy and asked, "What's your last name? 」

The boy said, "My surname is Wei. 」

Mother asked again, "What happened to Wei? 」

At this time, the man nervously replied: "I don't know why? My father's surname is Wei, too 」

Tutu said, "My mother calls me Tutu, which is nice!" "

The pig said, "My mother calls me a pig, which is nice!" " "

The dog said, "My mother calls me a puppy, which is nice!" " "

The chicken said, "You talk, I'll go first!" " "

The rabbit said, "I am a rabbit!" " "

The pig said, "I am a son of a bitch!" " "

The chicken said, "I am a son of a bitch!" " "

The dog said, "You talk, I'll go first!" " "

No.0 sparring partner said, "outsiders call me zero sparring partner, which is nice!" "

No.65438 +0 sparring partner said, "It's good to have an outsider!"

No.2 sparring partner said, "It's good for outsiders to call me the second escort!"

No.3 sparring partner said, "You talk, let's go first!"

The cat said to me, "I am your grandmother's." Listen, cat! " "

The dog said to me, "I'm your grandmother's dog. It sounds nice!" " "

The fish said to me, "I'm your grandmother's fish. It sounds nice!" " "

The bear said, "You talk, I'll go first!" " "

Lang Ke said: "People call me a ronin, which is very nice!"

The samurai said, "It's nice to be called a samurai!"

The expert said, "It's nice to be called an expert!" "

The swordsman said, "You talk, I'll go first!"

Jane Zhang said: "My fans say my idol is Ying."

He Jie said: "My fans say my idol is Jay."

Said: "fans who worship me say: my idol is constant."

Chris Lee said: "You talk, I'll go first!"

The senior math teacher said that I will teach senior math this semester.

The college physics teacher said: I teach big this semester.

The analog electronics teacher said that I teach analog electronics this semester.

The socialist economy teacher said: You talk, I'll go first.

Peking University said: I am from Peking University.

Tianjin University said: I am older.

Shanghai University said: I went to college.

Xiamen University said: You talk, I'll go first!

General Li Zongren said: I am a benevolent man!

General fu said to him: I am just!

General Zuo Quan said: I have this right!

General Huo Qubing said: You talk, I'll go first!

Minolta users say: we are beautiful women!

Canon users say: we are beautiful!

The user of Huaguang said: We are from China!

Nikon users said: you chat, I'll go first.

Once in military training, the coach said, "Class One kills chickens, Class Two steals eggs, and I'll cook porridge for you." One kind of shooting, the other kind of bombing. Let me show you. )

My friend is away on business. When he left, he said to meet online at 3 pm.

I waited left and right and finally arrived.

Before I could speak, I saw a message from there: "Turtles are really hard to recruit!" "

I didn't react for a moment: "What?"

Friends laughed; "Internet cafes are hard to find!"

The music teacher is called organ, the bodybuilding teacher is called Chen Yaling, and the boiler heat treatment professional teacher is called Wu Yanmei.

There is a school doctor named "Duan Zhen" in the school doctor's room of my middle school. We won't go to see her for an injection.

I know a man named Zhu Yiqun and a man named Yang Yizhi.

There is a teacher named Yin Genfa in our high school. We all call him a cigarette, hehe.

Mazhantian

There is a man named Qin.

Shousheng, I wonder what her parents think?

A junior high school girl named Yang Ni. The little girl is in poor health and is always ill. Every time the class teacher called her Yang Ni Yang Ni, she simply called her "Niang": "Didn't Niang come?" Is mother sick again? "

When I was a sophomore, there was only one person who failed the final exam, the principle of Marxist philosophy. His name was Ma Zhe.

Song Bo Qiu-I had a class together.

Wu's security guard-a driver.

There is a child named wisteria, which was originally a very elegant name. The flat old man named Du was depressed for a long time and put up with it.

A classmate of Jiaotong University: Yan Fei, the roll call at the beginning of school was laughing. After 1 month's military training, I changed my name to Fei Hong Zhong, but those who didn't laugh turned over this time.

At the beginning of the semester, the teacher called the roll in turn: Zhang San, Li Si, Zhu Du! -Pork belly? No one answered. For a long time, he raised his hand in a low voice all his life and said, "Teacher, is your name Zhu Yuepo?" Teacher::-All students except Zhu Yuepo::-)

My high school head teacher surnamed Gou changed his name during the summer vacation. At the beginning of school, some students saw him and respectfully called Mr. Gou. He was furious: I have never been surnamed Gou!

My classmate, electrician, name: Pang Guangda.

Fan Shigang

Once I watched TV, there was a student named Liu in the cast.

When I was in junior high school, the dean of the school was Jiao Hougen, exactly like the word "heel" in Suzhou dialect.

There is a classmate named "Duan Ming", which is pronounced the same as "death" in Suzhou dialect and later renamed.

There is a female reporter named Hu Yun and a female reporter named Hu Yue in Shanghai TV Station. Can anyone believe the reported news?

When I was in college, I went to middle school on behalf of the branch to inspect the performance of a classmate (a party activist). His former class teacher's surname was Zhao Zhuren (unknown at that time). At the end of the inspection, another student, party member and I said politely, "Goodbye, Director Zhao!" In fact, he is just a Chinese teacher and has no official duties. I didn't know the teacher's name until I came back.

An old cousin, the elder brother is called "Chen Cambridge" and the younger brother is called "Chen Fudan", but neither of them went to high school.

My high school classmate Wu has no problem pronouncing in Cantonese, but a teacher from Hunan came. The pronunciation of "Wu" and "Hu" is unclear and becomes a "fox". After several bursts of laughter, the classmate was never named again.

A few years ago, one of my colleagues was bored and looked through the phone book. He actually found a "Chen Bird" and called him with his public phone number. "... hello, I'm looking for Chen Bird ..." "This is me!"

There is also a very funny one: an old worker named Gou-> > dogs learn from chickens! ! !

There is also the name of a college classmate and colleague, one is Mi Yongcang and the other is Liang Wanku. There is also a college roommate named Wu Xingzhi-> > not interested! ! !

High school classmate (female) and her sister, a pair of strange names: Wang Yu Tianjiao, Wang Yu Shenzhou, how about it, domineering enough!

I have a patient named "Manager Tian", but unfortunately he was laid off.

There are two directors in the kindergarten, the male surnamed Gong and the female surnamed Mom.

There are two teachers in the foundation department of Southwest University of Science and Technology, who are very strict. Many students fell into their hands for the exam. One is Li Fuzhou (students call him "Li capsized") and the other is Shi (students call him "mortal", and Sichuan dialect does not distinguish between death and history).

When I was in college, some students from other departments were called "Duan Caijia"

Is it funny that a person is a big Zhu Chuanzong and a pig when he barks?

My cousin has a classmate named Bi Yuntao.

The manager of a hotel here is called money manager.

One of my former clients was called noodle handle.

There is another colleague named Cao Danao, whom we all call Cao Danao. ...

A friend named Li, who has a single biography for three generations, has a son. After thinking hard for several months, he won the first prize: Li Gen.

The mystery of country name

Two ants were walking on the road when they suddenly saw a big pear.

An ant said, "Hey, big pear" (Italy)

Another ant said, "Oh, big pear" (Australia)

Hey, move it (Spain)

Try occasionally (Russia)

Housekeeping (Bulgaria)

Eat pears (Kenya)

Pear is not tender (Lebanon)

Dad, pear ~ ~ ~ (Paris) Hehe, those two ants are father and son.

Dad, take it? (Panama)

Ants are mother and son. The little ant said, Mom, come and eat (Malaysia).

The mother ant said, son, that's Madrid (damn pear)

One of them saw it and shouted, what is this?

The other said, shh. . Pear (Syria)

Nuclear rot (Netherlands), you won't know until you eat it.

Bite down ... feet and rot (Finland)

A female ant climbed up a pear-Hungary (chest pressed pear)

An ant snatched it and said, This is my pear (Austria).

An ant bit a pear and its teeth fell out: shit (Congo)

Take another bite of the pear ~ ~ (India)

The ant took a bite and found that the pear had gone bad, saying, Woo-hoo (Uganda

One ant said to another ant, Brother, this is a big pear! (Costa Rica)

An ant took a bite, thought the pear was not crisp enough, and said, "It's flat." (Myanmar)

And pears! Hey! ? Luck (Iraq)

An ant said to an ant, man, what's the matter? (Jerusalem), ant B said to ant A: dizzy, difficult! (Yunnan)

A ant rushed up when he saw the pear, and b ant stopped him: pear, don't press it! (Libya)

Ant A is unhappy: Shit, the pear is not yours! (Liberia)

Finally, two ants divided the pears, and their mouths were full of honey dew! (Peru)

Two ants who just learned to talk, their brother said, "Sister, fruit" (America)

Homophonic joke story 2 1 One day, honest Xiao Li made four big wooden barrels overnight, and the next day he had to carry them to the town to sell them to subsidize his family. Xiao Li got on the bus early in the morning. After getting on the bus, Xiao Li saw that all the seats on the bus were full, so he took out a wooden bucket and sat down. After a while, the bus arrived at the next stop, but several people got on the bus instead of getting off. One of them is a beautiful lady in a one-step dress. After getting on the bus, she saw that there was no seat, so she took out a bucket of Xiao Li and sat down. Seeing the market, Xiao Li wants to put away the bucket. Seeing that the young lady still showed no sign of getting up, I had to tell her, "Miss, please lift your ass. I want a bucket. " As a result, the whole car laughed

2. The netizen sent me such a short message; A northerner went to the south on business and went to a restaurant for dinner. He asked, how much is the steamed bread? The waitress replied with a smile: Touching 50 yuan, the man asked: What's next? A: 100 yuan. The man was angry and asked: What about jiaozi? A: Sleeping for 200 yuan, the man shouted: black shop, black shop, I want to report it. The woman asked: Oh, you are from Haidian, Beijing. Of course, you can lift it if you can, and you can lift it if you can't.

Although it is a joke, it is very practical. In the north, steamed buns are called steamed buns, which is different from the touching nature of southerners. Northerners call eating noodles below, while southerners regard it as the lower body. Jiaozi and sleeping, black shops and Haidian, reporting and hugging are all homophones, and there are many homophones that can make countless jokes.

4. An old woman is preparing to go home after buying vegetables. On the road, there is a big road. She walked slowly past, and a car couldn't stop and hit her [chest]. She fell to the ground. The driver on the bus got off and asked about the injury! ? I want to take my old lady to see a doctor, but I thought to myself, "Which department should I take her to see?" So, the driver said, "Grandma, what subject does your injury depend on?" "The old lady said angrily," nonsense! Of course, I want to see both! 」

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