I didn't get a scholarship. Who can help me think of a joke?

Four priests Tang went to travel by plane, and the plane crashed on the way, but there were only three parachutes.

So, the Tang Priest said, let's answer the question, and jump if we can't answer it.

Tang Priest: Wukong, how many suns are there in the sky?

Wukong: One.

Tang Priest: OK, here you are.

Tang Priest: Friar Sand, how many moons are there in the sky?

Friar Sand: One.

Tang Priest: OK, I'll give you one, too.

Bajie on the side is so happy, such a simple question.

Tang Priest: Bajie, how many stars are there in the sky?

Bajie jumped down.

Before long, the four of them flew to travel again. They crashed on the way and there were still only three parachutes.

They went on answering questions.

Tang Priest: Wukong, when was People's Republic of China (PRC) founded?

Wukong: 1949.

Tang Priest: OK. Here you are.

Tang Priest: Friar Sand, how many people died in the Liberation War?

Friar Sand: 2.5 million people.

Tang Priest: OK, I'll give you one, too.

Tang Priest: Bajie, what are the names of those 2.5 million people? Bajie had to jump again.

The third time, the four of them traveled by plane again and had an accident on the way.

Then Pig said, Master, you don't have to ask. I jump by myself.

Then jump.

Tang Priest put his hands together: Amitabha, there are four parachutes this time.

One: I was reading a novel on the Internet, and I was seeing a wonderful place when I heard a knock at the door from the loudspeaker. Although I have heard the knocking sound of friends configured in qq online countless times, it is the first time that it is so dense and so long.

Out of curiosity, I pulled out the qq window to see what happened. It turned out that a guy named Huainan Feifei kept online and offline.

I can't stand it ... I switched the invisible state to online and threw out a sentence: "You pervert, why are you always online and offline?"

There immediately replied, "You are the pervert. How do you know you are invisible?"

I ignored him, but sent a message to all my friends with a message sender: "All qq addicts in the country, when you hear someone knocking at the door, you should think of Dong Cunrui, and the fire will not expose your goal ... in the end! ! "

Good intentions are not rewarded, and a thousand words are thrown over: "Shit, that's Qiu Shaoyun!"

Two: carry out stealth to the end, except offline is stealth! I always scold Tencent staff for being mentally retarded. Stealth and offline functions are enough. Why waste resources doing offline and online? ......

Still reading novels, or reading highlights ... There is news: "Hello!" " "

Huainan Feifei that pervert came again, determined to ignore him!

His message kept coming: "Why?"

Without rhyme or reason! What? Why? I ignored him and closed the news window to continue reading novels.

Or his message: "Never mind, I'll ask for you tomorrow."

? ! ! ! Although confused, he closed his news window and continued reading novels.

His message came again: "Well, I'm not free. Just contact Xiling Snow on this issue in the future. "

I can't bear it any longer. My first thought was whether anyone was chatting with him on my qq number, and it was related to the name I used elsewhere on the Internet, so I quickly sent him a message: "Shit, I don't understand."

Finally, I dyed the whole keyboard red with the blood I spit out in front of the computer, because I saw this message from him: "Hey, boy, how do you know you are invisible without this method?"

Three: I posted it on the edge of the computer screen and wrote it in eight big characters with blood I spit out: "Resolutely ignore the right and wrong in Huainan."

Then I read novels, online.

There is news, not Huainan. It seems that this guy is also a donkey, and his skills have become very poor.

It's a mm's head: "Hello!"

Say hello every day, it's really not creative! Ignore her, close the news window and read novels.

Ignore and miss, or the mm's message: "I read your" You pervert ",which is very interesting. I have several themes. Do you want it? "

Yes, of course. Some people say that if I can write100000 words, I'll get a book. I am trying to write it. I quickly sent a message: "Beauty, I love you so much. Send me your subject matter quickly! "

The news came back: "Hello, I am Huainan Feifei, and you are invisible." Shit!

I finally understand that being a traitor is really helpless, not because of health, but because of temptation.

Four: I made up my mind not to answer anyone's phone except me.

If you don't want to talk to anyone for the time being, just read novels or surf the Internet.

The news came that it was a fox's head ... In order to avoid being tempted by the content, I closed my eyes, grabbed the mouse and clicked on the screen, and secretly opened my eyes and glanced at it. Hey, I closed the information window.

Huainan is right and wrong. I'll see what you can do

No, only the flying fox in qq has been using a fox as an avatar for thousands of years. She is a great editor. My parents are well fed and well fed. They just sent her a manuscript yesterday. Maybe there is important news. I quickly opened her head and sent her a message: "I'm here, you want to see me?"

I suffered internal injuries. This time, not because of Huainan Feifei, but because of Hu Fei Millennium. She told me on the news: "I wish I were here." Huainan Feifei bet me that if you were here, he would treat me to a big meal! "

Brothers, don't be greedy for petty advantages, it will kill people!

Five: I really can't think of any other way to shake my determination not to return the news and expose my online methods.

Although my mother said that my brain was a little dull, after so much suffering, I wouldn't be fooled again.

The novel is really wonderful, especially on the internet.

Someone knocked at the door ... stop looking. It's Huainan Feifei, that pervert Ignore it!

"Why?"

"Never mind, I'll ask for you tomorrow."

"Well, I don't have time. Just contact Xiling Snow on this issue in the future. "

Shit, antique, ignore it!

A message came from mm's head: "I read your" You perverted pervert ",which was very interesting. I have several themes. Do you want it? " Still coming? Close the message window and ignore it!

A fox's head sent me, and I was sneering. It is definitely the sentence of the Millennium Flying Fox: "Are you there?" Open it and it is, ignore it!

The world is quiet ... but my heart is restless and all my moves are exhausted. Huainan, right?

There must be a conspiracy! I repeatedly told myself to be alert ... strange, nothing happened ... what is the drama?

Alas, I sent a message asking, "Baboon, are you still alive?"

Sure enough, he is still alive: "I knew your boy couldn't stand asking me out, hehe, playing stealth again?"

My mother was wrong. I'm not a little slow, but very slow!

I don't know if this counts, but just make everyone happy, hehe.

Be happy. Anger is not good for you. Watch more funny things.

Once upon a time, there was a playboy who was lazy and didn't study hard since he was a child. He often reads white and writes typos, which makes a lot of jokes.

One day, his wife was ill and wanted to eat loquat. He sent a servant to buy it. The servant was dumb, so he wrote a note and gestured for the servant to go to the fruit stall to buy something to eat. The mute can't read, so he went to the fruit stand and handed the note up. The fruit seller smiled at first sight, pointed to the opposite musical instrument store and told him to buy it there. When the mute entered the music shop, the shopkeeper was happy at first sight, and wrote another sentence on the note: "This thing doesn't weigh three kilograms, so it can't be sold." The dumb man came back with a note, and constantly chauffeured became angry when he saw that he had returned empty-handed. The dumb man handed me the note, and constantly chauffeured became even angrier: "Why can't it be sold?"? What nonsense! " His wife looked at the note and burst out laughing. It turns out that constantly chauffeured wrote loquat into pipa. She picked up a pen and wrote a poem:

Loquat is not this kind of pipa,

It's only my poor cultural level.

If the pipa can bear fruit,

The city is full of flutes and drums.

Hey, isn't this Xiao Wang?

Yo, it's Lao Li. What have you been up to recently?

Hey, it's nothing. I haven't seen your father since I played chess. How is he?

Thanks to you, it is still strong.

Your father also likes playing chess.

B: Really?

Yes, I used to play chess with your father.

B: (whispering) Why didn't I know?

Once we played chess, I had one scholar left and your father had one elephant left. . .

B: So it's not a draw?

A: yes, I am also a chess player, but your father quit and had to keep playing?

B: Ah, how do I get off?

A: Hehe, your father has an idea.

What idea?

Your father said, "Why don't we all cross the river?"

B: I have never heard of it!

A: Then your father's elephant crossed the river, and so did my taxi. Your father regards his elephant as me, and I regard my taxi as your father. . . Your father is like me again, I am like your father, your father is like me, I am like your father, your father is like me, I am your father, your father is like me, I am your father, your father is like me, I am your father, your father is like me, I am your father, your father is like me, I am your father, your father is like me, I am your father, your father is like me, I am your father, your father is like me. . . . . . . . .

B: Get out! !