Funny nonsense humorous copy

1. "What unscrupulous methods did your parents use to stop you from puppy love?" "Give me this face!"

2. Dare to face the bleak life, dare to face the dripping blood, just dare not face the mother-in-law's face.

If you haven't found a girlfriend in ten years, come to me. I'll send you a mirror to show you how disgusting you are and want to find a girlfriend!

The only difference between Superman and me is that I wear underwear underneath.

There are three kinds of interpersonal relationships among girls: those that can be seen without washing your hair, those that can be seen after washing your hair, and those that you don't want to see after washing your hair.

6. When I was a child, my mother kindly said to me: Good boy, you will never starve to death if you learn this skill. So my mother taught me to eat. ...

I told you to keep a low profile. But you have to give me applause and scream.

My hobbies can be divided into static and dynamic. Static is sleeping, dynamic is turning over.

9. When I was a child, I felt that Internet cafes were the most wasteful places. Twenty dollars will be gone in one afternoon. Now I feel that Internet cafes are the most economical places. Twenty dollars can sit for an afternoon.

10. Holding a hot, charging mobile phone, regardless of life and death, is a rare heroic moment in my life.

1 1. Aunt of the neighborhood committee: Son, what are you doing standing at the door alone in the cold weather? Why don't you stay in the house? Child: Dad, mom is fighting. Aunt of the neighborhood Committee: Damn it, who is your father? Child: That's why they quarrel.

12. My son failed in the middle school entrance examination and was scolded by his wife. I went to comfort my son: "You must study hard and surpass your father in the future." The son paused, and then said weakly, "I can't guarantee anything else." But I'm sure I'll find a better wife than you in the future. "

13. Save three times a day: save some flowers, save some flowers and save some flowers.

14. I have two questions. The first one is: why does it hurt when you accidentally bite your tongue, but it doesn't hurt at all on purpose? Second: Why bite your tongue now?

15. I saw a fat girl walking slowly on the treadmill in the gym. I used to remind her: "Sister, you have to speed up, or you won't lose weight." Sister listened to the wronged answer: "I adjusted it quickly, but it was slow when I stepped on it!" " "

16. The biggest failure in life is the Tang Priest. No matter whether he is an enemy or a friend, he wants to send him to the Western Heaven. He even dreams of going to the Western Heaven.

17. When I was a child, I looked down on those scum who fell in love. Looking back now, I think those classmates are really great. They were taken at a young age.

18. Son, what's wrong with poverty? If you are poor, stand up and let others see that you are not only poor, but also short. What about being short? Raise your head and let them know that you are not only short but also ugly!

19. I have a blind date with a girl. My mother likes her very much, so does my father. Finally, I recognized her as an adopted daughter and said that I was not worthy of her.

20. A woman asked the master: Master, in such a complicated and sinister world, how can a weak woman protect herself? The master said: Take off your makeup.

2 1. I went shopping with my husband that day and passed a fashion shop. Seeing the clothes inside, I suddenly had a desire to buy them. I said to my husband, "The clothes in this room are really nice. Let's go in and have a look. " Husband: "What are you going to visit? The clothes in this shop are super expensive. Do you have money? " I don't have much money in my wallet, so I said, "No need." Husband: "Let's go, go in and have a look."

22. I am like a fly lying on the glass. I have a bright future, but I can't find a way out.

23. I saw a pair of middle school students holding hands in the street today, and I couldn't help thinking of myself in middle school. I am also watching a pair of middle school students holding hands in the street.

24. When I came home from work yesterday, I smelled stew all over the room as soon as I entered the room. I hugged my daughter-in-law excitedly and said, "Wow, my daughter-in-law is really good, stew!" " Then the daughter-in-law said blankly, "No, it's windy, and the neighbor's house has drifted to our house!" " "