Are there any funny jokes or words that can attract people?

1. A man ventured alone in the forest and suddenly found himself surrounded by cannibals. So he shouted to the sky, "I'm dead, God help me!" " "I saw a voice falling from the sky at the first light:" Not necessarily, you can pick up a big stone on the ground and smash the leader to death. " So he picked up the biggest stone on the ground and threw it at the chief, just killing him. All the people stayed for a while, then glared at each other. At this moment, another voice came from the sky: "Now you are really dead. "2. School Booking Office: Tickets are particularly tight now. If the train ticket you want is gone, will you obey the adjustment?

Me: Obey.

After getting the ticket the next day, I was very angry: I booked a ticket to Shandong, why did I get a ticket to Shanxi! ! !

School booking office: Didn't you say that you obey the adjustment? Once the bell rings, everyone must go home. When going down the stairs, a boy stepped on his right foot with his left foot and fell into a big font in the middle of the road ... He thought at that time: No, it's too embarrassing, you have to pretend to be dizzy. As a result, the students next to him saw the boy motionless, quickly helped him up, and then slapped him in the past ... 4. Once upon a time, Americans went to Russia for sightseeing. One day, I saw two Russian workers on my way to Russia. One is to dig a hole by the roadside with a shovel, and dig a hole every three meters. Another worker immediately backfilled the hole just dug by the previous worker, and so on. ....

Out of curiosity, the American asked the first Russian worker, "Why did the guy behind you fill in the hole as soon as you dug it?" ? 』

Russian workers replied: "We are greening the road. I dig a hole, the second person plants trees, and the third person fills the soil. But the second man didn't come today. 』

5. An old man went to buy tomatoes and chose three. The stall owner weighed it and said, "A catty and a half, three dollars and seventy cents." Grandpa said, "just make a soup, you don't need so much." After that, I took off the biggest tomato. The stall owner quickly glanced at the scale again. "Two pounds, three pieces." Just when I couldn't see the past and wanted to remind my uncle to pay attention to the scale of the stall owner, he calmly took out 70 cents, picked up the big tomato he had just taken, and turned away. 6. After the mid-term exam, two students are talking. A: This time, I am miserable. I'm sure I'll be scolded if I go back ... What about you? B: Men's singles below B:80, women's singles below 70 and mixed doubles below 60 ... I can't even imagine this time. ...