Can babies be coaxed by threatening them?

If you don’t sleep, the big bad wolf will come and snatch you away! This is the most common way for the older generation to coax their children. It is harmless to use it once in a while, but it will make the children feel insecure if used too often. It is not advisable to scare children into sleeping.

When I was a child, my grandparents always used words like this to scare me. Whenever I didn’t eat or sleep well, my grandma would say: “The old witch bites the ears of disobedient children.” !”

As a result, this old witch became the biggest psychological shadow in my childhood. I would always unconsciously imagine what it would look like when I was lying in bed every night. The more I thought about it, the more afraid I became. Covering your head may even cause nightmares when you sleep at night.

A casual threat from adults may have an immediate effect, but it will plant a seed of uneasiness in the heart of the child.

When he feels unsafe around him every day, it is actually a very painful experience.

Maybe one day the adult’s lie will be exposed, but the child’s fear will not dissipate. Threatening the child to sleep with mother's love

If you make trouble again, I won't want you. Among all the words to scare children, "I don't want you" is the most harmful to the child.

Using "abandonment" as a hint and "mother's love" as a threat may be effective once or twice, but in the long run, the child will be left with fear and stress.

I once saw a story like this on the Internet: "Whenever I was naughty when I was a child, my parents would say that I was adopted from an orphanage and would send me back if I didn't obey."

< p>"I cried for a long time because of this sentence. For a long time after that, I was scared every day and didn't dare to mess around, for fear that I would make a mistake and be sent back to the orphanage. It wasn't until I graduated from college that I knew, What my parents said was a joke, and I suffered for more than ten years because of this joke.”

This feeling of being abandoned at any time often has a permanent impact on a child’s young mind. .

Alfie Cohen, the author of "Unconditional Parenting", calls this practice "withdrawal of love." This temporary emotional abandonment is not corporal punishment, but a colder punishment than corporal punishment.

In the eyes of children, parents are everything. No matter how naughty the children are, they should not threaten them with love. On the contrary, when children are difficult to raise, unconditional love is more important.

So, as parents, when we choose a method, we try to choose positive language. What we say to our children should be brief and focused, and we should stick to our own principles and use as little scaring as possible.

If you find that scaring children is really effective, it means that the children are really afraid. The consequences of this are far more frustrating than beneficial.