Sad! ! ! Who will tell some classic jokes! ! ! thank you ~ ~ ~ ~ Please, thank you.

1. Three white rabbits picked a mushroom, and the two big ones asked the small ones to get some wild vegetables to eat together. The youngest said I wouldn't go, so I left, and you ate my mushrooms. When the two big ones said no, the little white rabbit went ~ ~ ~ Half a year passed, and the big one said no. Eat the other big one first and then wait ~ ~ A year has passed, and the white rabbit hasn't come back yet. Come back, the two major discussions don't have to wait for us to eat. Just then, the little white rabbit suddenly jumped out of the nearby jungle and said angrily, Look! I know you want to eat my mushrooms. 2. One day ... a male deer ran faster and faster ... Finally ... he became a ~ "high-speed male deer" ~...3. One day, halfway through a candy aisle, his legs were weak! Once upon a time, there was a hedgehog rowing on a steamboat, and it missed ~ 5. Once upon a time, there was a steamed bread ~ eat a meatball ~ turn it into steamed bread ~ 6. One day, a little penguin went to play with a polar bear! Three years later, I went to the equator. I remember, the door at home was not closed. It was three years before he went home and closed the door. Then, six years later, at the North Pole, I knocked on the polar bear and said, "Polar bear, I'm coming to play with you!" " As soon as the polar bear opened the door, he took a look at the penguin and said, "I don't want to play!" " "Then close the child! Penguins are home! ! ! 7. There is a man who looks like a bicycle. As a result, one day she stood on the road and rode away. 8. A college student was caught by the enemy. The enemy tied him to a telephone pole and asked him, where are you from? I'll electrocute you if you don't tell me! The college student replied to the enemy's words and was electrocuted. He said, I'm from TV University! 9. An egg went to a teahouse to drink tea, and it turned into a tea egg 10. A woman ran into a dead end under the pursuit of cannibals, and her pants were wet with fright. The cannibal saw it and cursed: it's a pity that the soup was spilled. 1 1. Once upon a time, there were a rare steak and a rare steak in the street. Why don't they say hello? They are strangers ... 12. What would you do if you met a bear? Run faster than a bear. B. Run as fast as a bear. C, running slower than a bear. The person who chooses A is worse than an animal. The person who chooses B is an animal. People who choose C are worse than animals. 13. Two people fell into a trap. The dead call the dead, what is the name of the living? Help, haha 14. A white horse is called a white horse, a dark horse is called a dark horse, and a black and white horse is called a zebra. So what's the name of the black, white and red horse? It's a shy zebra, hehe 15. Q: Why do people go to bed? A: Because the bed won't walk by itself! 16. Q: One day, it took a bird 1 hour to fly from Kaohsiung to Taipei. But it took 2 hours to get back! Why? Because it is raining! So cover the rain with one hand and let it fly with the other. 17.q When did dogs get smaller and smaller? When the dog ran away. 18. It is said that there is a polar bear. Because the snow is too dazzling, he has to wear sunglasses to see things, but he can't find sunglasses, so he crawls around on the ground with his eyes closed and his hands and feet dirty. I put on my sunglasses and looked in the mirror before I found out: Oh, I'm a panda. 19. What animal jumps higher than a tree? A: All animals. Because trees can't jump more than 20. Q: A puppy was traveling in the desert and then died. How did he die? A: He suffocated because there was no telephone pole to pee in the desert. Q: A puppy was traveling in the desert and found a telephone pole, but it was still suffocated. Why? A: There is a sticker on the dotted pole, which says "No peeing here" Q: A dog was traveling in the desert and found a telephone pole. Nothing was posted on it, but it was still stuffy. Why? A: Many puppies are waiting in line. Q: A puppy was traveling in the desert and found a telephone pole. There is nothing posted on it, and there is a queue. The result is still suffocating. Why? A: Because there are two beautiful dogs MM behind him, he is very embarrassed. 2 1. Xiaoming got a new haircut and came to school the next day. The students all laughed when they saw his new hairstyle: Xiao Ming, your head looks like a kite! Xiao Ming felt very wronged and ran outside to cry. . Cry, cry. . He flew. . 22. One day, Xiaoming, who went to kindergarten, ran to his father: "Dad, Dad, what rises in the east and falls in the west?" "Well, is it the sun?" "No, no, five words! Dad thought for a moment and said, "Santa Claus?" "Wrong, five words! Just these five words! "Dad thought for a long time also think impassability. . . . At this time, Xiao Ming said: ". . . . . . . . . . . . . Stupid, yes, yes, the sun! ! ! ! "23.4 people are playing mahjong in the house. Why did the police come and take five people? Because the person they hit is called "Mahjong". Xiao Ming: "My father can drive without hands. Do you know why? "Ruobing:" Because you are lying. " Xiao Ming: "Yes! Yeah! "There is a polar bear playing with a penguin. Penguins pull out his hair one by one. After pulling it out, he said to the polar bear, "It's so cold!" Hearing this, the polar bear tore off his hair one by one and turned to the penguin and said, "It's really cold! "Two bananas run endurance in the competition, running and running ... The dominant banana sweats while peeling off the banana and throwing it on the runway, and the banana at the back slips. There is a loaf of bread, and I feel hungry when I walk, so I eat it. I say that there is a polar bear, because the snow is too dazzling. He wants to wear sunglasses to see things, but he can't find them, so he crawls around on the ground with his eyes closed, crawling and looking for sunglasses when his hands and feet are dirty. I put on my sunglasses and looked in the mirror before I found out: Oh, I'm a panda. Wu Zongxian's classic joke ~ ~ "I hate that there are two kinds of people in this world ~ one is racist and the other is black. "A pair of corn fell in love, so they decided that one corn could not find the other on their wedding day. Corn asks the popcorn next to it: Have you seen our corn? Popcorn: Honey, I'm wearing a wedding dress. Next, the two steamed buns fell in love and decided to get married. One steamed bread can't find another. This steamed bun asked the flower roll next to me: Have you seen our steamed bun? Hua Juan: Honey, I'm wearing a pan head. Another child: Mom, why do you always teach me to go high and water flows low? Mom: Because … because people are monkeys. Q: What do African cannibals eat? A: people! Q: Then one day, the chief fell ill and the doctor told him to be a vegetarian. What did he eat? A: Eat vegetables! ~ ~ American: Have you ever seen a cup made of wood? China: No! American: Then why is the Chinese character "cup" beside the wooden character? China people: Isn't there a word "no" next to the word "cup"? In other words, it is not made of wood. The science teacher asked: Why is the body cold after death? No one answered. The teacher asked again: Does nobody know? At this time, a classmate stood up and said, that's because you are calm and naturally cool. What animal jumps higher than a tree? A: All animals. Because trees can't jump, there is a boy in the class who gets good grades, but he is not attentive in class. One day in physics class, the physics teacher couldn't bear it anymore and told the man to stand up. Say to the man: Why do you have so many questions? I saw the man slowly answer: I am hairy and not sick! ! Excuse me: Who gave you the water of forgetfulness? Answer: Aha ~ ~ Reason: "Aha, give me a cup of forgetful water ~ ~" Xiaobai+Xiaobai =? White rabbits (two) ~! Marketer: Kid, do you have any dogs, kittens, rabbits or birds at home? Child: No, my mother gave birth to me! Q: What animal is the best? Answer: Pigs, because pigs (beads) are good at calculation. Q: What animal sticks to the wall most easily? A: Haibao Q: What happens when a fat man falls from 12 floor? A: Fat Q: Who will help you eat when you are full? A: Longfei, because Longfei added: A puppy died while traveling in the desert. How did he die? A: He suffocated because there was no telephone pole to pee in the desert. Q: A puppy was traveling in the desert and found a telephone pole, but it was still suffocated. Why? A: There is a sticker on the dotted pole, which says "No peeing here" Q: A dog was traveling in the desert and found a telephone pole. Nothing was posted on it, but it was still stuffy. Why? A: Many puppies are waiting in line. Q: A puppy was traveling in the desert and found a telephone pole. There is nothing posted on it, and there is a queue. The result is still suffocating. Why? A: Because there are two beautiful dogs MM behind him, he is very embarrassed. The little white rabbit skipped to the bakery and asked, "boss, do you have a hundred buns?" "Boss:" Oh, sorry, not that much. " "I see. . 。” The little white rabbit left in frustration. The next day, the little white rabbit skipped to the bakery. "Boss, do you have one hundred steamed buns? "Boss:" Sorry, I haven't. "I see. . 。” The little white rabbit left in frustration again. On the third day, the little white rabbit skipped to the bakery. "Boss, do you have one hundred steamed buns? "The boss said happily," Yes, yes, we have one hundred steamed buns today! ! "The little white rabbit took out the money:" Great, I'll buy two! ""When the millionaire drove past a village in a luxury extended Lincoln, he saw two beggars pulling grass by the roadside and stopped immediately. "Why do you eat grass?" "We really have no money ..." A beggar replied. "Really, get in the car and go to my house." "I have a wife and two children at home ..." A beggar muttered. "Call 1 and the rich man points to another beggar." And you, call your family, too. ""My family has a large population. Besides my wife, there are five children. " Another beggar said it doesn't matter, and they all called, and went to 1. In this way, both beggars and their families got on the bus, but it was a long bus. On the way to exercise, a beggar's wife said gratefully, "Boss, it's very kind of you to invite poor people like us to come home." The millionaire replied, "Nothing, I just came back from abroad, and my house has been neglected.". The lawn in the yard may be more than one meter high, so you can eat enough. Once upon a time, there was a cotton candy, which played for a long time. He said, "I'm so tired. "Xiao Ming bought instant noodles 10 and cut them newly. When he came to school the next day, his classmates all laughed when they saw his new hairstyle: Xiao Ming, your head is like a kite! Xiao Ming felt very wronged and ran outside to cry. . Cry, cry. . He flew. . Asun and appa have nothing to talk about, and time waits for no one. A song: "Recalling childhood, the happiest thing is Children's Day. Appa: "Youth Day is in ten years. "A song:" Father's Day will be in ten years. Apa: "In a few decades, this will be the day for the elderly." A song: "In a few decades. "A Bo:". Tomb-Sweeping Day. "12 Since Israel opened to the outside world, all countries have flooded into Israel ... Israel: Wow! A lot of people ~ Ismail: Yes, I saw many gods of war and popes ... Ismail: What are they doing here? Ismail: Come to the meeting. Ischia: What meeting will be held? Yi Yi: They came to discuss how we should face the challenges after joining the WTO. Ischia: ... 13 One day, at the height of the national war, the gang leader came to the front of the grassland to boost morale ... The guild leader asked: What happened? Report to the member archers: report to the head! There is a Bezos archer beside the tent 20 meters ahead, but his accuracy is poor. He has shot many times these days, but he didn't hit anyone. After listening to this, the colonel asked: Since we have found the enemy archer, why not kill him? The archer said: Report to the team leader! No, don't you want them to exchange it for a more accurate one? 14 when my friend Li Shansi and I just moved, there was no TV at home, which was very boring. Let's pretend that there is a TV set on the desk, and then we can change the channel by pretending that we have a remote control. This son of a bitch keeps changing channels. I told him, but he wouldn't listen. Then we started fighting. 15 The movements of divers are very difficult. He turns three times, then somersaults three and a half times, and then somersaults for a month. 16 Xiaoming: Have you ever seen a tortoise shake its head? Kangkang (shaking his head) No Xiaoming: Have you ever heard the story that a fool said yes, an idiot said no, and a mentally retarded person said nothing? Kangkang: ............. 17 Soldier: "Thirst ... Thirst ..." Cao Cao: "Hold on a little longer! I have been to this place before, and I remember there is a Merlin nearby. It may be just a short journey. " Soldier: "Oh! There are plums to eat! Oh! "The expedition found a lot of water!" Cao Cao: "Ha ha ha ha, did you hear that? Finally, there is water to drink. " Soldier: "If you don't go ... you must find Plum ..."/Kloc-On the day Zorro died in 0/8, Zorro went to see her at his mistress's house. The hostess asked Zorro, "What should I do when my husband comes back?" Zorro said, "It's okay. If your husband comes back, I will jump out of the window and my horse will pick me up below. " If you hear three knocks at the door, my husband will come back. Zorro said: I see. After a while, it rained. Suddenly there were three knocks at the door: knock, knock, knock. If it's too late, it will be soon. Zorro jumped out of bed and suddenly jumped out of the window. When the hostess saw Zorro leaving, she went to open the door. I saw a horse standing in front of the door and said to her, "Tell Zorro it's raining outside and I'll wait for him in the corridor." 19 A girl is lovelorn. I advised her: "Toads with two legs are hard to find, and men with three legs are plentiful!" " We all know that girls come every month and call them "good friends", but do you know why they call them that? → Isn't it very vivid to separate the word "good friend"? Women have it every month! -2 1 A girls' school is haunted. One day I was met by Xiaohong. The ghost said: junior. . . Look at that. . . I have no feet. . . I have no feet. . . Xiaohong: That's nothing. Listen, senior, I don't have breasts. I have no breasts. A passenger plane was flying when it was suddenly hit by a small airflow. The passengers panicked and thought that the end of the world was coming. A beautiful young girl stood up and got up the courage to say to everyone, "Dear male passengers, who can let me taste the taste of being a woman before I die?" As soon as the voice fell, a man in the back seat stood up and said, "I'll do it!" " "Say that finish, the young man took off his T-shirt, revealing a strong muscle. The young girl looked at the handsome man shyly and admiringly, imagining his next move. I saw the young man throw the T-shirt to the girl and said, "Iron it! " !" Once upon a time, there was a man named Cai Xiao, who was abandoned and spoiled all night ~ ~-24 A rabbit and a turtle who ran very fast won the game. Kang said, "I don't know. What is the answer? Xiao Ming said, "The answer is' green bean paste (mung bean shark)'. Ah, you are so stupid! Xiao Lv asked the old donkey, Why do we eat hay every day? The old cow lamented that we men can't compare with us. People eat by running errands. One day, Xiao Qiang asked his father, "Dad, am I a stupid child?" Dad said, "Silly boy, how can you be a silly boy?" Where's Xiaoming? He will have an exam tomorrow, but he is watching TV in the evening. Xiaoming's mother asked anxiously, Have you read all the books? There will be an exam tomorrow. Xiao Ming replied brightly: Mom, I finished reading it. Xiao Ming's mother praised Xiao Ming happily: Good boy, then you must do well in the exam tomorrow. Xiao Ming cried and said, Mom, I mean,' Mom, I think it's over'.

Please accept it, thank you!