How do women who can’t speak unintentionally harm others?

Normal people can speak. But it is a bit difficult to ensure that what you say is pleasing to the ears and at least does not offend others. Women tend to talk more. If there are three women in a drama, if they talk too much, they will inevitably make mistakes more easily than men. In particular, there are some women who are not very good at speaking and are afraid of being treated as mute in social situations. They always interrupt the conversation from time to time, often making a lot of jokes and even making people unhappy.

For example, praising and expecting to be praised by others are things that women often do and often look forward to. But there is an unspoken rule in praise, which is that it is allowed to be moderately exaggerated and slightly out of touch with reality. The taboo is that it must not be taken seriously. If you are too serious, you are not very good at talking. Example. One day, a woman went to work wearing the new clothes she just bought, and met A girl and Ot girl. According to conventional practices, when you see your girlfriend wearing new clothes or new jewelry, you must promote the spirit of humanitarianism and praise her as soon as you meet her, so that the person wearing the new clothes will get unlimited psychological satisfaction. Sure enough, Girl A was very knowledgeable about the market, and she burst into laughter as soon as they met, praising the clothes for how beautiful they were, asking where she bought them, and saying that she must buy one too. The words are cliches, but they conform to the rules and are very pleasing to the ear. After a few simple rounds, the person who praised has completed the task, the person who was praised has enjoyed it, the heat is appropriate, and it can end successfully. But unexpectedly, Otome who was standing aside added, "The clothes are nice, but they look a little thin on you." I can guarantee Chairman Mao that what Otome said is definitely 100% truthful. But the truth was like a knife piercing her heart. "It looks a little thin", doesn't it mean that she is too fat and not suitable for wearing this dress? In today's world, saying a woman is too fat is more uncomfortable than stabbing her with a knife. It seems like a commonplace thing to say, but it is too cruel and inhumane to say it in this place and at this time.

Also, many people will unintentionally hurt others through intentional modesty. Another example. One day, senior executives from several companies gathered, including two or three female white-collar workers. In order to show respect for women, the men present tried every means to praise the female white-collar workers. Among them, Man A said to Otome, "Look, Otome is not only good-looking, but her work ability and level are also above us. She is young and promising, and she is a hero among women." Originally, such words were just for the occasion. When people say this, you just listen to it, laugh and joke a few words, and it will be over quickly. But Otome was very serious, and she felt that it was difficult for A-man to praise her in front of so many people. So, she said to everyone seriously, how can I compare with the seniors? Then he looked at one of the men named Bai and said, "How can I be good at that? I'm not good at all. I'm not even as good as your Mr. Bai." In fact, these words are still good words. To say that you are not as good as Mr. Bai is to elevate him. But this elevation is only relative to oneself. If placed in Mr. Bai's circle, it would actually belittle others. Not even as good as so-and-so. The so-and-so mentioned here is often generally considered to be the least capable. Not even as good as the least capable, that is, even worse. Otome humbly said that it didn't matter that she was even worse, and inadvertently dragged Mr. Bai into the ranks of the worst. Can people feel comfortable?

There are many such things in life that "harm others but do not benefit oneself". Both men and women should take this as a warning.