Soviet political jokes

A joke is something that makes people laugh. Jokes are short in length, simple and ingenious in story, often unexpected, giving people a wonderful feeling of being suddenly enlightened. The following are my collection of Soviet political jokes (6 selections), I hope you like them.

What's the difference between mathematics and scientific socialism?

In mathematics, what is given requires proof, while scientific socialism can prove everything, but it can't provide anything.

A man reported to Khrushchev: "Now there is a play in the Grand Theatre, and you are in it. Whenever it appears, the applause below is warm. " Khrushchev was very proud after hearing this. One day he bought an ordinary ticket to see the play. He was so lost in thought that he forgot to applaud. At this time, someone next to him gave him a push and said nervously, "Hey! Why don't you clap? Don't die? ! "

At the 23rd Congress of the Soviet Union, Brezhnev made a report and asked, "Do we have any enemies here?" One person replied, "There is one. He is sitting in the eighth seat in the fourth row. " Bob asked, "Why is he the enemy?" A: "Lenin said that the enemy will not doze off. I found that only he didn't doze off! " "

The speaker is reporting the achievements of the five-year plan: a new power station has been built in Leningrad.

Someone in the hall said, "I just got back from there." There is no power station there. "

Without answering, the Speaker continued: "A chemical plant was built in Stalingrad."

Someone in the hall said, "I was there a week ago, and there was no chemical factory there."

Speaker: "Comrades, you'd better stop wandering around and read more newspapers!" For example, Pravda! "

Stalin quoted a classic at the conference: "Marx and Lenin said 1+ 1=2, Trotsky and Bukharin said 1+ 1 is not equal to 3. Trotsky and Bukharin, right? Or are Marx and Lenin right? " The audience below looked puzzled. "There is no doubt that Marx and Lenin are right!" Under the warm applause, "Trotsky and Bukharin are spies sent by imperialism, and it is unforgivable to say that 1+ 1 is not equal to 3 ..."

Ivan, a member of the collective farm, caught a big fish in the river and went home happily and said to his wife, "Look, we have fried fish to eat!" " "

"There is no oil."

"Then cook!"

"There is no pot."

"Grilled fish!"

"There is no firewood."

Ivan was very angry. He went to the river and threw the fish back. The fish drew a semicircle in the water, with its upper body above the water. He raised his right fin and shouted excitedly, "Long live Stalin!"

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