I need a joke to amuse my girlfriend.

The ringtone of a buddy in the dormitory is the sound of a baby crying. One day, this guy was constipated in the school toilet and couldn't get out for a long time. He roared with pain. At this moment, the cell phone bell suddenly rang ... and then, this guy became famous. ...

I happened to meet a colleague when I was shopping in the supermarket with my three-year-old daughter. My colleague enthusiastically took out a box of Barbie dolls and a big bag of chocolates from his shopping cart and gave them to her daughter. I am delighted: "Girl, thank you, uncle." The daughter shouted excitedly, "Thank you, uncle." After my friend left, I still wondered why this stingy guy was so generous today. When I got to the cashier, it was a mess. . . . [