The woman didn’t ask for a bride price, but her mother-in-law gave her 60,000 yuan for her sister-in-law’s wedding, but the woman didn’t let the bride in. What do you think?

A common phenomenon in marriage nowadays is a "betrothal gift" that can make the man's family hate it and satisfy the woman's family. Nowadays, bride price has become an essential part of a wedding.

However, bride price can not only ruin a marriage that is about to enter the marriage ceremony, but also cause conflicts in some native families. When every couple plans to get married, they must be full of expectations and want to continue playing their love with joy.

Not only are the two newlyweds happy, but the whole family should also be beaming with joy. Marriage is also the most important happy event for both families, but now many weddings turn into tragedies midway. This phenomenon of regretful marriage is all caused by the "betrothal gift".

Not everyone values ????the betrothal gift. Some people value the guarantee of the quality of marriage more. Most of the time, such people give up the bride price for love.

Netizen Leilei left a message and told me that she recently encountered a dispute over a bride price. She married her husband two years ago. She and her husband are college classmates and have a deep relationship. When she got married at the time, her mother-in-law said that the family supported two college students and had little savings, so she might not be able to afford the bride price.

Leilei thought that she and her husband had been in a relationship for so many years, so there was no need for those worldly concepts to affect their relationship.

She promised her mother-in-law not to ask for any betrothal gifts, and she and her husband bought the wedding house together with their own savings. They paid for part of the wedding expenses themselves, and her mother-in-law took part of it.

After two years of marriage, she and her husband are not living a wealthy life, but their relationship is very good. In married life, nothing can go wrong, but the relationship between husband and wife must be good.

Leilei said that her husband is also a very motivated man. They want to work hard on their careers first, so they have no plans to have children for the time being. They have their own house, they don't live with their mother-in-law, and they don't have any conflicts.

But the recent marriage of her brother-in-law made her very dissatisfied with her mother-in-law. On the day of the wedding, Leilei was also there to help. After the bride arrives at the hotel, as the eldest sister-in-law of her husband's family, she also has to go and greet her parents' family.

But while Leilei was busy in and out, she overheard the conversation between the bride and her mother. What the bride's mother meant was that when the groom and bride returned home, she would give the 60,000 yuan gift from her husband's family to her daughter in front of the groom.

When Leilei heard this, it was like a bolt from the blue. She shed tears of grievance. Her mother-in-law was too biased. She wanted to tell her husband, but she saw that her husband was busy greeting the guests and she didn't want him to get off the stage.

She didn’t eat and went to her mother-in-law’s house to wait for their wedding to be over. In the meantime, her husband called to ask where she was. Leilei said she was not feeling well and that she would go home to rest as if nothing happened.

When the whole family went home chatting and laughing in the afternoon, they saw Leilei sitting at the door blocking the door. With that posture, anyone with a discerning eye would know something was wrong.

Leilei’s husband first asked him what was wrong? She didn't say anything, but when her mother-in-law asked her, she said: "Mom, if my sister-in-law wants to enter this house today, you give me 60,000 yuan and I will let her in."

Everyone knew what to say. Only Leilei's husband looked confused and scolded her for being ignorant. Leilei hadn't had time to tell her husband the truth.

The evil mother-in-law complained first, pointing at Leilei and said: "At that time, you said you didn't want the bride price. Now what do you mean by coming here?"

Leilei is not the same. It was easy to offend, so she directly retorted back regardless of her image, "It's not because you said you didn't have the money that I didn't want it."

My mother-in-law said: "For whatever reason, you didn't want it at the time. Now you're looking for trouble. Forget it." What's going on? This is my house, why don't you let my daughter-in-law enter the house?"

The only sound in the corridor was the argument between Leilei and her mother-in-law. Her father-in-law was afraid of disturbing the neighbors, so he asked everyone to go inside first. explain. Leilei didn't want others to laugh, so she gave way to everyone.

After entering the living room, the bride was unwilling. She cried and accused Leilei of bullying her, but what the bride said was not unreasonable.

She said: "Sister-in-law, even if you are angry that my mother-in-law gave me a bride price and did not give it to you, you have no right to deny me entry. First of all, this is the house of my father-in-law and mother-in-law. Secondly, any conflicts are between you and should not be brought into the house." I got involved. To put it bluntly, this matter has nothing to do with me. It’s my business to accept a bride price when I get married, and it’s also your business to accept a bride price when you get married.”

Her sister-in-law's words made Leilei realize that what she did was indeed inappropriate, but she still could not forgive her mother-in-law for being unfair to her.

Leilei’s husband also understood the whole story. Although he also knew that his mother did something wrong in this matter, he couldn’t say anything. After all, she was his own mother, but he didn't want his wife to be wronged, so he was really in a dilemma.

In the end, it was Leilei's father-in-law who said that he would go to the bank to transfer money to Leilei the next day. The mother-in-law wanted to say something else, but her father-in-law stopped her.

Asha’s analysis:

In this dispute between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, first of all, the mother-in-law was at fault. Two years ago, you had no money to give a bride price to your eldest daughter-in-law. Out of her kind heart and her relationship with your son, she did not make it difficult for you.

Two years later, you have enough money to give a gift to your second daughter-in-law, but the key is still behind the back of the boss and his wife. If this matter had been explained clearly to the eldest daughter-in-law from the beginning, or some compensation had been given to the eldest daughter-in-law appropriately, things might not have turned out like they did later, making both daughters-in-law dissatisfied.

As the eldest daughter-in-law Leilei, it is inevitable to get angry when she hears her mother-in-law’s partiality towards her sister-in-law in private. No one would be happy about this, but it has been two years since she got married without asking for a bride price. It seems a bit unreasonable to say it now. It is reasonable to say it is unreasonable. To be honest, it is difficult to identify.

But no matter what, Leilei should not vent her anger on her sister-in-law. As others said, in the final analysis, this matter has nothing to do with others. It's impossible for her to get married without a bride price, and she doesn't want it either.

If you feel uncomfortable, just ask your mother-in-law for an argument. It doesn’t matter if you keep your sister-in-law out of the door. With this move, Leilei used up all the reasonable character she had saved when she got married.

Leilei’s actions not only created a grudge against her mother-in-law, but also made her grudge against her sister-in-law. From now on, the mother-in-law and sister-in-law will definitely stand together, and she will fight alone.

The most difficult thing about this matter is her husband. Her husband chooses to remain silent, not because he does not love his wife. Rather, he was not qualified to ask for a bride price from his parents on behalf of his wife.

In most native families, it often happens that parents favor siblings. In fact, if you really encounter someone, don't rush to argue. Not only will the argument not solve the problem, but it will also make you unreasonable.

In this situation, you are the reasonable party, so you must know how to make good use of your own advantages to negotiate terms. Of course, if you can think openly, you should not argue about money or the like. It will not only hurt the harmony between family members, but also make things difficult for your other half.

Don’t fight for your parents’ property, rely on your own hands to work hard, live a good life, and demonstrate your abilities.