A communication segment is a collection of social images.

If you have money, you will say that you must go bad. If you have no money, you will say that you are really a failure. Have achievements and say that you will speculate; No achievement, say you are worthless; Have a lover, say you are really bad; No lover, right? Call you a pervert.

Middle-aged troubles

The position is not high, the salary is not high, and the blood pressure, blood lipid and blood sugar are high; Politics is not prominent, business is not prominent, lumbar disc herniation; The conference does not speak, the meeting does not speak, and the prostate is inflamed; Cooking paste, cooking paste, mahjong paste.

Difficult to criticize

Criticizing superiors, the official position is difficult to protect; Criticism at the same level, difficult relationship; Criticize subordinates and reduce the number of votes; Criticize yourself and ask for trouble; Criticize your wife, and she runs around.

The poor and the rich

Money owed to individuals is poor, and money owed to the country is rich; It is the poor who drink to see the degree, and the rich who look at the brand; It is the poor who write books, but the rich who pirate them; The poor eat poultry and the rich eat wild animals. The poor farm the land, and the rich buy and sell it.

Poverty and affluence

Raise pigs when you are poor and dogs when you are rich; Plant rice when you are poor and plant grass when you are rich; I want to marry a wife when I am poor, and I want to find a lover when I am rich; When you are poor, you have a wife and a secretary; when you are rich, you have a secretary and a wife.

banquet

Three tragedies of dinner: the person to be invited didn't come, and the person who came has nothing to do with you, leaving you awake when you check out.

Enter the wrong line

Now these days-professors shake their lips and make money everywhere, more and more like businessmen; Businessmen appear in the pulpit, writing books and making statements, more and more like professors. Rumors are well-founded and basically true, more and more like news; News catches the wind, exaggerates at will, and becomes more and more like rumors. ...

Now the location of the enterprise

Always layoffs, referred to as the president; Always with a straight face, so he is called the boss; I always want to spy on people, so I call the director; Often make trouble without reason, call the manager; Make the leader's secret comfortable and call the secretary.

100 meter dash; 100-metre dash; 100-metre sprint

An old lady said with tears after watching the black 100-meter race, how scary! Several coal diggers knelt in a row and were shot, but they fired without aiming. The children were so scared that they ran away and the rope couldn't stop them.

beautiful

The beauty of learning lies in confusing people; The beauty of poetry lies in inciting men and women to cheat; The beauty of a woman lies in being stupid without regrets; The beauty of a man lies in lying.

Public toilet package

The mobile boss went to the public toilet, and the guard said, Go in and get 30 cents, and get 20 cents! The boss is stupefied: Do you still charge for coming out? Grandpa said: learn to move two-way charges. When the boss came out of the toilet, he was stopped: you squatted in the No.8 pit, and the number selection fee was one yuan, plus one yuan overtime for more than three minutes. There is background music in the toilet, and the ringtone fee is 20 points. If you come here often, I suggest setting up a public toilet package, and it is more cost-effective to send 200 pieces of toilet paper. ...

eat

Some foreigners say: I finally understand that China culture is actually a kind of "eating" culture. For example: making a living is called living; The post is called a rice bowl; Being hired is called muddling along; Spending savings is called eating old money; Stir well and call it eating; Men rely on women to call it soft rice; Men taking advantage of women are called eating tofu; Beauty is delicious; Being popular means being popular; Special care is called eating a small stove; Regardless of others calling for a person to eat; Being hurt is called suffering; Jealousy between men and women is called jealousy; Hesitation is called uncertainty; What can't be done and eaten; Can't afford the responsibility is a person can't afford; If you are incompetent, you can't call it dry food!