Joke Collection Website - Cold jokes - How do parents write funny stories with their children's words?
How do parents write funny stories with their children's words?
Son: Mom, what is a buffalo and what is a scalper?
I thought about it for a long time, and I think this answer is good: the horn is straight and the buffalo horn is curved.
The son suddenly stared at the long curly hair of an aunt next to him: Oh, I see, the buffalo's horn was burnt.
two
Many people say that his son has a big head, and he himself calls himself a "big head son".
One day it was raining lightly, and my son went out bald. I shouted, don't run, take an umbrella!
He shook his head and said, I have an umbrella!
I haven't heard him say in turn: my big head is an umbrella!
three
One day, my son woke up and rolled in bed because he didn't want to get up. He was late for kindergarten.
I said: hurry up, it's too late, the children have eaten all the delicious food!
He opened his eyes, glanced out of the window and asked, "Is it late there?" It's daylight. Do you think there is a moon in the sky?
four
My son wants to make animal puzzles, but he can't find the drawings of the puzzles.
He ran over and shouted, Mom, I can't find the painting. How to spell it now?
I said let's look for it, so I helped him look for it together, but I couldn't find it after searching everywhere.
The son was anxious and patted his head: What can I do?
He is anxious, and I am anxious. I'm afraid he will bother me if he can't spell the picture. I saw his big eyes rolling. Suddenly happy: I know, I know.
I thought he knew where the painting was, but he said, why did you paint it? I can think with my head!
As soon as I heard this, I quickly encouraged: Yes, this puzzle is very easy. You can use your brain to spell it out without drawings!
So the son cheerfully began to do it himself, saying; Fortunately, my head didn't fall off, otherwise I really couldn't spell it!
five
On his fifth birthday, his son was naughty and disobedient. I threatened: if you are naughty again, mom won't buy you a cake today!
He said, well, if you don't buy cake, I won't celebrate my birthday! Do you know what will happen if I miss my birthday?
I said: Mom doesn't have to spend money!
I saw his face primly: wrong! But on my birthday, I will not grow up. I will always be four years old. Watch what you do!
six
My son's skin is very white, and everyone who has seen him says: such good skin looks like a girl. He doesn't seem to like this kind of compliment, and then he deliberately sunned himself as soon as he went out, saying that his skin could be darker and he would look like a boy.
I don't want him to care too much about his skin, so I said, baby, do you know why you are white? Because you are a rabbit.
What do you mean by rabbit?
That is to say, you are a white rabbit, and of course you are very white.
Hearing this, he smiled, which was very novel: I see!
Where does mother come from? He asked again.
I said mom was a monkey, but the monkey changed.
He was even more surprised: you are a monkey, how can you have a rabbit?
I have nothing to say but that this mother doesn't know either!
seven
Son and father always get along well.
As soon as dad came back from the outside, he saw his son watching TV, so he ordered: I only watch TV all day, so stop watching it quickly!
My son pursed his lips and protested, I just watched it for a while! You said I was what you wanted to see. When you go home, you just watch TV, unlike me! (This is also true)
But this can't be helped. Laozi's authority is always greater than his son's, so his son had to give up TV. When watching TV, the father will command his son to serve him: Son, turn on the electric fan for me.
My son won't listen. Dad said: disobedience is not a good boy.
The son said, why should I listen to you? You don't look like a good father!
After all, my son finally turned on the electric fan reluctantly. ]
After a while, my father said, bring me a cup, son!
The son who is playing by himself is very obedient this time. He got off the chair at once, but he ran into the room. In a blink of an eye, he took out a quilt and piled it on his father: take it!
Mo Baba ... >>
Question 2: How to write the child's parent record 1? Children's children's children's children's children's children's children's children's children's children's children's children's children's children's children's children's children's children's children's children's children's children's children's children's children's children's children's children's children's children's children's children's children's children's children's children's children's children's children's children's children's children's children's children's children In addition to explaining things to children, children can also go online with their parents and feel for themselves. They can also take their children to the library to find relevant information. 2. Unhealthy children's language is the reproduction of children's poor language expression ability. Children's vocabulary is not rich enough and grammar is not well mastered, so there are often some unhealthy children's vocabulary. For example, "I want to hit the puppy with a stick" will become "the puppy hits me with a stick", and so on. Adults should not laugh at such unscrupulous children's words. On the one hand, we should correct children's language in time and give correct guidance; On the other hand, we should strengthen the cultivation of children's language expression ability, let them speak more and practice more, and let them master the language more skillfully.
Question 3: How to write childish words in the kindergarten growth manual? You can listen to what children usually say, and you will find some words from adults.
Childish language
1, bearded feet.
One morning, I was cooking in the kitchen and asked my 4-year-old son to dress himself.
I'm as busy as a bee in the kitchen. The son shouted in the room: "Mom, come and see, I have grown up and a beard on my feet!" " "I went to my son's room and saw him standing on tiptoe, watching carefully." Mom, look, I have a beard on my feet, or a white beard! ""He said, pointing to a few sparse hairs on his big toe.
Looking at my son's lovely appearance, I smiled. He said solemnly, "Mom, what are you laughing at? Really, I have a beard on my feet, and it's still white, don't believe you! "
I am getting old, too.
One day, when my son was playing, he found a very thin and short hair on the ground and asked, "Mom, have you lost your hair?" I said, "Of course I dropped it." "Why?" I casually said, "Because I am old." The son took the hair he picked up and said, "mom, look at this hair." I must have dropped it, and I'm getting old.
Step 3 cut the flowers.
One day, my 4-year-old son squatted in front of the blooming chrysanthemum, holding a knife in his hand and "cutting" the flowers attentively. I told my son that this flower can't be cut. My son said, "I'll cut it when its hair grows."
4. Who made shoes for horses?
A mother took her daughter back to her hometown in the country and saw a horse on the way. The child asked, "Mom, why is this dog so big?" The tail is so long? "Mom said," this is a horse, not a dog. "The child asked again," Why is the horse still wearing shoes? "Who did it?"
5. Donkeys are also immortals.
My son brought a questionnaire home from kindergarten. My son answered me to take notes. After answering the name of the Eight Immortals, I praised him. Who knows, he said: "Mom is wrong, there is another one." I shook hands with him again and said, "No, just these eight." "There is also a donkey." The whole family laughed.
Question 4: How to write nursery rhymes in kindergarten parents' handbook? You can listen to what children usually say. Listen more, and you will find some childish words of young adults. One morning, I was cooking in the kitchen and asked my 4-year-old son to dress himself. I'm as busy as a bee in the kitchen. The son shouted in the room: "Mom, come and see, I have grown up and a beard on my feet!" " "I went to my son's room and saw him standing on tiptoe, watching carefully." Mom, look, I have a beard on my feet, or a white beard! ""He said, pointing to a few sparse hairs on his big toe. Looking at my son's lovely appearance, I smiled. He said solemnly, "Mom, what are you laughing at? Really, I have a beard on my feet, and it's still white, don't believe you! " 2. I am also one day older. When my son was playing, he found a very thin and short hair on the ground and asked, "Mom, did you lose your hair?" I said, "Of course I dropped it." "Why?" I casually said, "Because I am old." The son took the hair he picked up and said, "mom, look at this hair." I must have dropped it, and I'm getting old. 3. Give flowers a haircut One day, my 4-year-old son squatted in front of the blooming chrysanthemum, holding a knife in his hand and "cutting" the flowers attentively. I told my son that this flower can't be cut, and my son said, "I'll cut it when its hair grows." "4. Who makes shoes for horses A mother took her daughter back to her hometown in the country and saw a horse on the road. The child asked, "mom, why is this dog so big?" "The tail is so long?" Mother said, "This is a horse, not a dog." The child asked again, "Why is the horse still wearing shoes?" Who did this? "5. Donkey is also a fairy son who brought a questionnaire home from kindergarten. My son answered me to take notes. After answering the name of the Eight Immortals, I praised him. Who knows, he said: "Mom is wrong, there is another one." I shook hands with him again and said, "No, just these eight." "There is also a donkey." The whole family laughed.
Question 5: How to write funny stories in children's words and play them at will.
Question 6: How do parents write their children's handwriting? 1. Children's words are a sign of their lack of life experience.
At the stage when children really don't understand, they lack certain life experience, but they are curious about everything and are willing to explore, so there is a childlike saying that "surfing the Internet is a spider's web on the roof" and "the ears of the white rabbit are stretched out".
We should not only provide correct knowledge and experience, but also understand children's interests in time to arouse their enthusiasm for learning. For example: What is surfing the Internet? In addition to explaining things to children, children can also go online with their parents and feel for themselves. They can also take their children to the library to find relevant information.
2. Children's naive words are the reappearance of children's poor language skills.
Children's vocabulary is not rich enough, and grammar is not well mastered, so there are often some malicious children's words. For example, "I want to hit the puppy with a stick" will become "the puppy hits me with a stick", and so on. Adults should not laugh at such unscrupulous children's words. On the one hand, we should correct children's language in time and give correct guidance; On the other hand, we should strengthen the cultivation of children's language expression ability, let them speak more and practice more, and let them master the language more skillfully.
Question 7: Interesting stories written at home in kindergarten growth records. The world in children's eyes is colorful, the language in children's mouths is childish and lovely, and the actions made by children are humorous and interesting ... What a meaningful thing it is to record many interesting stories of children's children's childhood words in our kindergarten growth files! Please follow us into the world of children.
Bao Xiao's brother's two front teeth began to tremble. After the baby found out, he immediately told his grandmother. Grandma said, "My brother's baby teeth need to be changed." My brother was anxious: "Who said that my teeth are deciduous teeth? I have teeth to eat. " The baby said, "Brother, your rice teeth have been changed. Do you want to change them into steel teeth?"
● One day, my mother was talking to someone: "I haven't heard of this kind of deer running electric cars." Hearing this, Yue Yue said in despair, "Mom, this road is for walking. How can it run? "
Question 8: Kindergarten Small Class Growth Manual: Fun at home. Every little bit of a child at home can be recorded in the manual. If you are a teacher, ask your parents to provide it for you. If you are a parent, think about the classic childish words of your child. Cute, funny and absurd things can be recorded. If I write about my daughter, I think I can write a novel! ?
Question 9: How to write children on the topic "My Time with Children" makes me think seriously. We ask our children to do this and that, constantly repair according to our ideal template, and even force them to do things they don't want to do. Because children depend on us for food, they have little choice. If it doesn't suit our wishes, we will scold them: Why are you so disappointing? Look how well their children learn English. Look at you, you are so stupid. If children can choose, can they also say: See whose parents are attractive and capable. I also want you to be a doctor like someone's father and a general manager like someone's mother.
Of course, children need guidance, but they should not be too utilitarian, respect their personality and let nature take its course rather than encourage them. What child is not born like an angel? Which child is not born a good prospect? Oranges born in Huainan are oranges, and oranges born in Huaibei are oranges. Don't always blame the children. Let's see if we are Huainan or Huaibei.
We provide food and clothing for children, and children bring us happiness; We work hard and our children enrich our lives. Respect children, just as children will not choose better parents than us; Accept children, work hard, and grow up with them, instead of standing still, but blindly demanding and accusing them.
Many times, children don't need expensive toys and beautiful clothes. All they need is that their parents can take time to accompany them, talk to them as equals and listen to them patiently, instead of scolding the world they see. What is needed to educate children is love, and educational skills are necessary, but all skills should be based on heartfelt love.
My favorite sentence is: Family education means that parents and children grow up together. I was pleasantly surprised to find that I can still be so happy, so happy and so lively and interesting on the road of growing up with my children.
What makes me even more gratified is that since my son went to school, he has been rated as a model student or a three-good student every year, which has been well received by teachers. More importantly, my son has developed good study habits, so far I have never accompanied him to school. ...
On a busy day, in the complicated business, I am busy looking out of the window, and those childish words and innocent and interesting things about children will always emerge gently.
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