My boyfriend is a very humorous person, and I also want to learn something funny. If you have any humorous jokes, tell me about them! Preferably hilarious. Thank you all…

1. Grandpa and grandson went fishing. Grandpa was dazed with the fishing rod. When the grandson saw it, he said to his father: Look, your dad is in a daze there, like a cow. The father slapped his son and shouted angrily: Your father is so awesome! 2. There was a drought in a certain place in May. A farmer went to ask a charlatan when it would rain. After a while, the charlatan handed the farmer a folded note and said: Because the secret of heaven cannot be leaked, it can only be opened and read when it rains. . Soon it started to rain, so the farmer opened the note and saw it said - It will rain today. The farmer sighed, it was so damn accurate. 3. On the bus in the morning, a man took out his mobile phone from his bag to check the time, and then said something "I'm CAO", I thought he didn't have enough time, but when I looked carefully, I guessed he was holding an air conditioner remote control in his hand. 4. Feces and urine are good brothers. One day, the cow was hit by a car while crossing the road. The cow said: "I really want to poop." 5. One day, a group of small animals were discussing in front of the Guan Gong Temple. Suddenly, they smelled a smell. The cow said: " This fart was not from me, I was eating grass. The snake said: "I don't know how to fart..." The pig said: "Those who fart will definitely blush!" ! ! ! Guan Gong rushed out and kicked the pig away, saying, "I blush because I am born with it!" ! ! ! ! ! " 6. A man was preparing to commit suicide because he was heavily in debt. He unscrewed the cap of the poison bottle and drank it all. As a result, the cap of the poison bottle read: Congratulations on winning the 1 million grand prize~! 7. Remind everyone to use the Internet with caution Language. I know a child who always said "I fainted" and "I collapsed", and later suffered from cerebral ischemia. Experts suggested that it would be safer to change to the traditional saying "I cao", but experts also suggested that it would be safer. He also said: It should not be too frequent. 8. The boss bought a lie detector robot. Father: Where are you going? Son: Go to the library. The classmate watched a pornographic film. Father: You are so brave. I have never seen it before. The robot then slapped his father and said, "You deserve it, you are so harsh on your son." ! Bang! The robot slapped his mother again. 9. I have been very tired at work recently, so I asked a friend who I have known for a long time: "How to decompress"? 10. After get off work, several computers gathered together to play Landlord, and they also played at the water dispenser. He lost every time, but still insisted on participating every day. Sofa didn't understand and asked the chair: Why did he still play at the water dispenser? Are you so excited? The chair said, "Is your head wet when you ask such a question?" 11. I was really touched - suddenly I felt that 360 has a deep love for Tencent. Even when the confrontation reached the level of openness, when he started QQ, 360 still protected him as always and scanned for account-stealing Trojans. You love someone so much that you hate him and you still can't bear to let him get hurt. I cover my face and burst into tears... My dear, I want to be your 360! ! ! 12. Once you have dinner in a hotel, you can order songs in the lobby. While I was eating, I heard the sweet voice of the host coming from the speakers: "The following is the song Mr. Zhang ordered for everyone. This gentleman wishes everyone lots of money!" The host paused for 5 seconds and then said: " The name of the song is "It's a Pity It's Not You" 13. How long is a minute? It depends on whether you are squatting inside the toilet or waiting outside the toilet. 14. There are 4 brothers. One day, they went to the park to play... Suddenly I saw something on the ground. The eldest brother took a look and said, "It looks like poop." The second brother squatted down, sniffed the thing and said, "It smells like poop." The third brother poked it with his hand and said, "It feels like poop." It tastes like poop. The fourth brother poked it with his hand, licked it with his tongue and said, "It tastes like poop." After saying that, the fourth brother sighed: "Fortunately we didn't step on it!" !!~~~~" 15. A man with cancer went to the hospital for surgery. The doctors who performed the surgery on him all wore masks. The man said angrily: "Why do you need to wear a mask for surgery?" The doctor was speechless: "This ……………” The man yelled again: “I think you are afraid that I will recognize you if you treat me to death?” 16. In Chinese class, the teacher called up a sleeping classmate to answer a question. The classmate was confused and couldn't say anything. The teacher said helplessly: "Can you do it? If not, just squeak!" The student said: "Squeak."

17. When I was in junior high school, the biology teacher once lectured about the ecological environment on the African grasslands. No one in the class listened. The teacher got angry and said, "You all look at me!" If you don’t look at me, how do you know what an African wild cat looks like? ”