Joke Collection Website - Cold jokes - "The green plum has never been green, the green plum has withered"

"The green plum has never been green, the green plum has withered"

"There are no green plums, green plums wither...

? No bamboo horses, bamboo horses grow old..."

On Valentine's Day, Shu Yue was eating hot pot. I accidentally swiped my phone and saw Mu Yuan's newly updated Moments. There was this sentence attached to a picture.

? Shu Yue left a message across the phone screen: "Who is your childhood sweetheart?"

? "You!" Mu Yuan's profile picture suddenly flashed out.

? Shu Yue smiled, wondering when this dull man became so good at making things up. Even though they have known each other for six or seven years, the president has never met him more than a slap in the face. When did she become his "childhood sweetheart"?

? Although there is still a smile on Shu Yue's mouth, the corners of her eyebrows are unconscious. She frowned and fell into memories for a moment...

In 2010, Shu Yue had just graduated from university and was working in a company doing online marketing, and met Mu Yuan by chance. One is a northern girl, literary, good at talking, and fond of daydreams; the other is a southern man, rigorous, rigid, and one-dimensional. Mu Yuan is Shu Yue's customer. In order to please customers and promote marketing, Shu Yue, who is young and careless, often tells Mu Yuan some jokes or cares about his welfare. Gradually, we learned that Mu Yuan was not only a doctor, but also a partner of a chain organization. Shu Yue's admiration arose spontaneously, and she called Mu Yuan "Doctor" or "Teacher" from time to time. At first, Mu Yuan only discussed business with Shu Yue, but gradually he also made some cold jokes to tease Shu Yue. The two of them gradually talked about more and more things, but Shu Yue was always very carefree.

One day, Mu Yuan suddenly told Shu Yue: "Little girl, I like you..."

After reading it, Shu Yue replied: "Doctor, stop joking..." After finishing the word, Shu Yue couldn't help but smile.

"Just wait, little girl!" Mu Yuan said nothing more, and the QQ avatar turned dark.

Half a month later, Mu Yuan suddenly sent a message to Shu Yue: "Little girl, I have arrived in your city!"

? Shu Yue saw the text message and immediately called back: "Doctor, why are you here suddenly?"

? Mu Yuan paused and replied: "When I was holding an exchange meeting, I met a director, and she said she was from you. There happened to be someone The project requires inspection and study, so I’m here.”

“Uh!” Shu Yue nodded while holding her mobile phone, thinking that there is still something for this great master in our small city to learn?

When Mu Yuan heard no reply from Shu Yue, he asked on the phone: "Little girl, when are you free? May I treat you to a meal?"

Only then did Shu Yue remember that Mu Yuan wanted to I received a batch of samples from the company but haven't paid yet. "Okay! When will you pay for that batch of samples, Doctor?"

"Come on. I'll give you the money directly!"

< p> "Okay!"

In this way, Shu Yue and Mu Yuan saw the true face of Lushan for the first time.

"You are just like in the photos and videos, doctor." Shu Yue looked at Mu Yuan, who was wearing a crisp suit and standing elegantly beside him.

"You are more elegant than in the photos and videos, little girl." Mu Yuan smiled, with warmth in the corners of his mouth and between his eyebrows.

"Shall I treat you to hot pot?" Mu Yuan asked Shu Yue.

"I'm not hungry! Just sit down for a while!"

"It's dinner time, how can I not be hungry? Let's go!" He said, pulling Shu Yue up The sleeves went out.

In the end, Shu Yue really didn’t take a few bites, and Mu Yuan acted as translator throughout the whole process. Mu Yuan asked for steamed buns and tea in Mandarin with a southern accent, but the waiter didn't understand.

? After Shu Yue and Mu Yuan had dinner, they also asked for samples.

Muyuan wanted to invite Shu Yue to visit the small town where she lived, but Shu Yue had to go to work and couldn't get away. Mu Yuan walked around the small town by himself, and then replied to Shu Yue: "This small ancient city where you live is quite leisurely and comfortable. What a pity! You can't be my tour guide.

"

"Sorry, doctor! "Actually, this small town is much worse than the city you live in." "

? Muyuan left after half a month of exchange and study. Before leaving, he wanted to make an appointment with Shu Yue again, but Shu Yue was delayed by something.

? "Actually, I'm here for you! "Muyuan sent a message to Shu Yue on the way back.

"Aren't you here to exchange studies and develop projects?" Shu Yue replied.

"They are all following me. Study, I can't learn anything here... I like you, Shu Yue! first! I traveled thousands of miles for a woman..."

? Shu Yue didn't know how to reply for a while. She put down her phone and looked at the text message sent by Mu Yuan for a long time... In her heart, this man was indeed excellent. She had all the external temptations, but she had always looked up at him, feeling that he was so far away. Looking at Mu Yuan's text message, Shu Yue felt that he had come out of a fairy tale to send it to her. The role of the glass slipper is incredible! I also become Cinderella who is going to the feast in a pumpkin carriage...

"Please give way, madam, the dishes are ready!" ”

? Just when Shu Yue held her chin and thought for a long time, the waiter served all the dishes. Shu Yue adjusted her sitting posture and prepared to eat.

After a while, a The man sat down with a rose and said, "Happy Valentine's Day! Wife! "Said and handed it to Shu Yue.

? Shu Yue took the rose and smiled: "Thank you, Bo Chen! "

? Shu Yue posted a picture on Moments with the following message: "True love does not amaze the time, but softens the years. "After sending the message, Shu Yue and her husband started to eat.

After the meal, Shu Yue looked at the circle of friends again. In Mu Yuan's state just now, the words Shu Yue had just posted appeared, "True love, It doesn’t amaze the time, but it softens the years. "

Out of curiosity, Shu Yue entered Mu Yuan's original sentence "There is no green plum, the green plum has withered... There is no bamboo horse, the bamboo horse grows old..." into the Baidu entry. A large paragraph of text Come into view...

"Every time I meet you, I pretend to be happy

I am afraid that time will be too dull and wear away my memory

When I wake up, I mistakenly think you are close at hand. Never give up

? Your beauty is fixed in the photos taken at the age of 24

? All kinds of handsome photography poses are fascinating

Thousands of cute things Your expression interprets your angelic naughtiness

Like a child, you use Lolita to interpret the blooming flowers

Like an old woman, you weep after the vicissitudes of life and the world is shaken

Xu is an elf, I am saddened by your weirdness and mystery

Can I write a hundred love poems to you without permission

Continued to the 88th issue, it hurts so much that I can’t breathe < /p>

From now on, everyone I fall in love with is like you

? You cry, how can a woman like the wind be so annoying

Look, you win How thorough

? I will sing the love song alone and remember you forever."

Shu Yue sat in the car, her hand holding the phone trembling, and she was speechless for a long time. Husband Bo Chen smiled and said: "Honey, isn't the hot pot base too spicy? Look, my eyes are filled with tears! "

Shu Yue did not speak, but seemed to hear someone saying: "Little girl, I like you! "

"Little girl, I am not a doctor! You don’t have to feel inferior! I'm waiting for you! "

"Little girl, I just want to see you happy! "

"Happy Valentine's Day, little girl! "...