How to reply humorously when you are caught stealing a bag?

If you are caught stealing a bag, you can reply as follows:

1. I am trying to lose weight. I didn't expect you to care so much about me.

2. I thought I was stealing food, but I was actually secretly preparing a surprise.

3. This is the safest way for scientists to supplement calories. Let's try it.

After answering someone who finds himself caught stealing food, you should adopt a relaxed, humorous and optimistic attitude, and don't become depressed and inferior.