Classic lines of spring festival evening sketches

The first snow in 2003 was a little later than that in 2002.

3. Impulse is the devil!

4. You make me want to die!

Don't tell me, I joined the leading group as soon as I came!

6. The pig hits the tree, and you hit the pig and rear-end!

7. China New Year is coming. You have a pig and a donkey. Which one do you kill first?

8. It's time for piano performance. ...

I can't kill you!

10. Stupid, so stupid, you are old and stupid! Guess what?

1 1. Fool, then fool!

12. If you want to live a decent life, you are not afraid to take some green on your back. Horizontal batch: Ninja Turtles!

13. Brother, I really smoked!

14. The basketball player is Yao Ming, and the house at home has no roof; The sketch actor Pan Changjiang, the house is like a water tank.

15. The east wind blows and the drums beat. Decoration is inseparable from the yellow sledgehammer. You smash this house and that house, I'll smash whoever I want.

16. This style is very unique. Isn't it six plus seven?

17. Why not play cards according to the routine?

18. Go your own way and make your ex-wife regret it!

19. You can treat your husband as a handyman during the day, but don't treat him as a handyman at night.

20. It is fate to turn around and sell for one year! I learned it from a pit, thank you! Horizontal approval is: self-taught!

2 1. Changing the door is not to prevent thieves, but mainly to prevent decoration.

22. Family members posing as leaders ...

23. Brother, call me if you want!

24. At least I wear glasses. What should I do?

25. City people belong to honeycomb briquet, and they are all thoughtful.

26. What is IQ? Give it to ... give it to me!

27. You respect me one foot, I respect you one foot, respect other people's personality and set an example!

28. Well, it's just ... it's just that you think this thing is ... interesting?

29. Is your father big or the city big?

30.IC, IP, IQ card, tell me the password!

3 1. Wait ... Wait ... I ... I want to rob a woman.

32. This person stands at a different height, so he looks at the problem from a different angle!

33. Dai Gong committed a crime.

34. Suddenly the sea is vast, and turning back is the shore.

35. my god! Earth! Which angel sister gave me this tone!

36. It's hard for rich people to have no money!

37. This is a discussion between patients about their illness. What are you meddling in?

38. I don't tell ordinary people.

39. Higher vocational education is not as good as high salary, high salary is not as good as long life, and long life is not as good as happiness.

40. How do you know I'm sexy?

4 1. The wages of migrant workers cannot be defaulted!

42. that's quite ...

43. He bullied my wife, and I bullied his wife!

44. heaven and earth-which angel sister gave me this tone!

45. You're sorry about your hairstyle!

46. There are rows of girls around you, and Master Bao will be a success!

47. Marriage is a person's second reincarnation. I didn't vote for your uncle!

48. The sledgehammer is equivalent to a chef of catering, a master of science and technology, a big shot in the entertainment circle and a senior colonel in the army. ...

49. One dog is equal to five guards. ...

50. This kid is so thoughtful, hurry up … ride the donkey quickly. How can this child do such a small business? I want to do great things!

5 1. The cruel reality is pushing my psychological bottom line. I can't explain to the audience unless I sell him something this year!

52. In those days, your face was like a peeled egg. Now, your face is like pickled garlic.

53. If you ignore me, I will become a dog.

54. If you don't get the favor of lesbians, you will be hurt.

55. Want to know what she said? Drink the wine, or raise dolphins if you can't drink it clean!

56. Don't say anything, it's all in the wine.

57. Sorrow really makes me feel sad for you!

58. Fate!

59. It is unscientific to look at a woman all her life, and it is easy to see the disease.

60. Compare your head with Pan Changjiang, compare your hair with Peisi Chen, and speak Mandarin with US President Bushby!

6 1. Baiyun: Black Earth apologizes to you. Please open your eyes and see how pathetic I am. Can you and I repeat yesterday's story today, and can my old boat ticket board your wrecked ship!

62. Your aunt is not the aunt six years ago, and your uncle will always be your uncle!

People say that marriage is a conductor. I have been a semiconductor for 20 years. Why didn't I call?

64. This hammer is from me! Let us people celebrate the New Year. Buy one get one free with a hammer today!

65. Let's go to the hospital to add a chin tomorrow. In this way, you can directly host Lucky 52, and I will host Extraordinary 6+ 1, which will definitely be a hit!

66. Your disfigurement equals plastic surgery!

67. Say loudly to the administrator before going in: Look clearly! Don't come out and say that I stole your monkey!

68. Isn't this job overbearing?

69. Press 1 for abductions, 2 for cars, 3 for brain teasers and1/kloc-0 for stretchers.

70. I eat carotene and have always been nutritious! Didn't I just see an apple?

7 1. Everyone knows that!

72. The foot of my bed is shining with such bright light that every grain is hard; Climbing up a flight of stairs, I looked up and found it was moonlight.

73. High-end high-end is to make you happy and be fooled. Now developers say peeing is a hot spring.

74. Would you like to say you look like Li Yong?

75.what? I'm ... I'm ... the bodyguard of the general manager of Kaiyuan Victoria Entertainment Plaza!

76. In terms of success or failure, life is heroic, and big ... big people ... start all over again. ...

77. The last meal, the next meal, and finally accompanied by gastroptosis ...

78. What is written with black pen is bold, what is written with red pen is red, and what is written with colored pen is color.

79. "Congratulations, the pig thinks so."

80. She goes to primary school and I go to junior high school; She went to junior high school and I went to high school; She is in high school, so am I. ...

8 1. Money is a bastard. If not, do it again!

82. It is better to read the art of war than the menu.

83. Damn it! The world is so crazy, mice are mothers to cats!

84. Sister-in-law's name is Sudan Red, and the hotel is closed! My uncle's name is bird flu, and he opened a farm and went bankrupt!

85. The distance has widened and the beauty has disappeared! Don't shout when eating, call-hello! The meal is ok, come down and take a nap!

86. I am not a villager. I am in Haidian and have a temporary residence permit!

87. Your spirit is outstanding, your deeds are outstanding, and your lumbar intervertebral disc is also outstanding. ...

88. Little sample, I don't even know you when you put on the vest?

89. Married men know that at home, the daughter-in-law is the Commission for Discipline Inspection.

90.2008 Beijing Olympic Games, pregnant in 2007.

9 1. The grateful one, I thank him. ...

92. A mother is bald and a father is bald.

93. A bad daughter-in-law is a bomb around her, and a good daughter-in-law is a bunker around her.

94. If someone bullies you, tell me! I beat his face into a color screen, his head into vibration, his ears into chords, his tongue into a straight line, his front teeth into motion, and his nose into a turn. Anyway, I beat him to second hand!

95. The assessment of son-in-law is very important. Better put on your helmet.

96. Lay your own eggs and let others talk.

97. Behind every successful man, there is a woman, and behind every successful woman, there are a group of men.

98. I'd rather believe in ghosts than people!

99. Others compare with my parents, and I will compare with others tomorrow.

100. You are so talented!

The most painful thing in life is death.

Well, the money has not been spent yet. The most painful thing in life is that there is no one.

Dead, the money is spent. 、

102. It seems very tactful.

Absolute integrity