Why do I never want to return to my hometown after so many years?

Yesterday when I was shopping on a certain website, I accidentally saw that this question had become a hot topic. After reading the various experiences and opinions of the respondents on this issue, I feel deeply moved and moved deeply. Taking advantage of my insomnia tonight, I would like to share with you my experience and thoughts on this topic. If any friends have similar experiences and opinions, you can leave a message in the comment area and I will reply to you one by one.

Before telling the story, I would like to introduce you to you a little bit about myself as usual: My hometown is a county-level city outside the third and fourth tiers. Due to the abundant energy sources such as steel and coal, it is located in the province. It's also somewhat famous. It is precisely because of these unique conditions that the overall living standard of the people in my hometown is relatively well-off, and the local tyrants and wealthy people are also rich. My workplace is in a small town and village in the south outside the 18th parallel line. It belongs to an industrial park. The income level is acceptable, but compared with my hometown, the quality of life is not even a little worse.

Therefore, in comparison, friends who wander in Beijing, Shanghai and Guangzhou do not want to return to their hometown either because their dreams have not been fulfilled, or because they want to enjoy a better quality of life, or because they want to pursue Better job opportunities. But why would I, a "villager" outside the 18th Parallel, rather work in this desolate land than return to my hometown?

Let me tell you the reasons in detail.

In fact, this idea first came to me when I was in high school.

In the first year of high school that year, my sister was still working hard in Beijing, and her work had improved slightly. She could earn nearly 10,000 yuan in monthly salary at that time. Thanks to her, I was lucky enough to take a high-speed train and set foot on the long-awaited land of Beijing for the first time during the summer vacation. Let me explain, there was no high-speed rail at that time.

It was the first time I got on a train that seemed so luxurious to me. I was so excited that I couldn’t describe it. On the train, there were many passengers from the north and south, but the atmosphere was unusually quiet. It was not as noisy and smoky as when I took the green train before. Most of the passengers in the car have a magazine and a book in hand, and they are immersed in their own worlds without disturbing each other. I was the only one who was carefully observing their actions. When I got off the train, I was very emotional. I had only heard that people in big cities were of high quality, but I didn’t expect that even the passengers going to Beijing were so well-educated. I couldn’t help but feel. I have a little yearning for the outside world.

When I came to Beijing, my sister got me a magnetic card that is common for buses and subways. When I took the subway, I saw a huge crowd for the first time. The subway was so crowded that my sister and I were squeezed into a corner and were bumped into or stepped on several times by passengers beside us. However, they were not like the people in my hometown who just looked at it and treated it as if nothing had happened. Instead, they kept moving towards us. My sister and I apologized.

Some of the passengers in the car were listening to English carefully and speaking slurred words. Some whispered about current affairs and politics with their friends next to them, and some were on the phone in the corner talking to customers about business... In the crowd of people in the subway, I experienced the tense and fast-paced life in Beijing for the first time, and I felt deeply about it. A surge of positive energy has arrived for the people in the capital.

After enjoying the magnificent sights and wonderful life in the capital, I pulled my sister and said to her: "Sister, I must go to school hard and leave my hometown. This is the city I long for. This is the life I want to live in the future. I didn’t even know that the outside world is so fascinating~"

When I returned to school, I studied hard like a chicken blood and continued to For quite a while. Unfortunately, due to various personal and school reasons, I did not persist, but my inner longing for the outside world has never been shelved.

As the old saying goes: The master leads you in, and cultivation depends on the individual. There is nothing wrong with this statement, but the kind of master and the kind of practice environment do determine the extent to which a person's practice can reach. Although my Beijing dream went bankrupt at the time, my desire to leave my hometown and seek a better life outside has never been extinguished.

If this experience just opened an idea in my mind, then the following things have further strengthened my belief.

After graduating from college, my friends either continued their studies, worked hard outside, or returned to their hometowns to work in enterprises or institutions. Since I dropped out of high school to work, I haven't had much contact with them. I just keep in touch with a few of my good friends.

I believe everyone understands without telling me that I was a bad student in high school, and my best friends naturally didn’t have a few top students studying abroad. Therefore, those friends who have returned to their hometowns to work in businesses or public institutions can be said to be the backbone of my friends.

Let’s take the recent events as an example.

Two months ago, I took a break from work and returned to my hometown. One evening, Big Z sent me a WeChat message, saying that we would have a good get-together in the evening. At that time, I had already started to contact him, and I was busy writing for a long time. I didn't call my friends for many days after returning home. I felt a little sorry, so I told my parents that night and went to the restaurant designated by Big Z early for the meeting.

After arriving, I waited for a long time, but I still didn’t see him. So I called him. The noise on the phone was endless, and the sound of mahjong collisions was clearly audible. I asked him what he was busy with and he hadn't come yet. He told me that he was socializing with some very important people and would come later. I didn't expose him, I just told him to go early, saying that his parents would be worried if he came home too late. Big Z replied impatiently, "You have a lot to do, let's get over it." Then he hung up the phone.

An hour later, an Audi parked in front of the restaurant. Big Z floated out of the car, followed by several young men in suits and ties with leadership style. Big Z nodded and bowed past me to welcome them in one by one. He turned around and said to me: "Why do you come out wearing such shabby clothes? Look at the young people in our big WA (hometown abbreviation) who still wear these." You are so stupid, and you earn so much money in a state-owned enterprise and you don’t know how to take care of yourself. It’s really embarrassing to be with you.”

Seeing his expression change from flattery to domineering, I suppressed my heart. Feeling dissatisfied, I pretended to be joking and replied to him: "It turns out that Adi is out of date in my hometown. It seems that I am really out of date." After hearing this, Big Z rolled his eyes at me and tried to pull me away. Going in, I asked doubtfully: "Isn't this a gathering of our buddies today? Why are we getting involved with these people? Luo Zi and Da Wei are not free to come?" "What do you ask them to do? They are here every day. Everyone in the factory was dumbfounded. Luo Zi called me every day and I didn’t take him to his place. If my colleagues knew that I was in a government unit and played around with these idiots every day, it would be strange to die if I didn’t laugh at them. You are the only one in a state-owned enterprise. It's okay for me to say something, please do your best today, these are all prominent figures in our world, please have a good chat with them, don't embarrass me again!" After Big Z finished speaking, I became even more excited! I was annoyed, but thinking that today was a big gathering of people, I couldn’t get angry on the spot, so I laughed dryly and went to the private room with him.

At the wine table, after finishing the routine, I realized that the big shots in Big Z’s words were actually those who earned six to seven hundred yuan a month and lived in a dream like Big Z until dawn. Senior Temporary Worker”. They have cars and houses on their accounts. They each have a Samsung Apple and point out the world at the wine table. They all have a few big words on their foreheads: "My dad is not short of money."

Now that they know me After a simple background, I seemed to disappear from their sight like air, and no one paid any attention to my existence. Big Z was standing aside and toasting frequently, while I was on the table, brushing my phone with my head down, silent. The whole dinner came to an end happily amid the "dirty jokes" that they thought were hilarious and the so-called sexy news in the officialdom.

After the meal was settled, several people began to take advantage of the phone calls and walked out arm-in-arm. Big Z came to me at this time and said that he only brought less than two hundred, so he gave them all to me and asked me to help him pay the bill. I can't help but laugh, you big shots chatting at the wine table can't even afford a meal. Big Z told me with a bad smile on his face that today he mainly arranged to introduce me to a few contacts, and food and money were a trivial matter. He would give me a call in a few days when he has enough money.

I didn’t want to say anything more to him, so I swiped my card and was about to leave. Big Z stopped me and told me that I was going to a nightclub for a second night and asked me to go with him. I told him that I would not accompany him and walked home. Amidst the roar of the car, they drove toward the next combat location in a mighty manner.

In fact, I have seen these things more than once among several friends in my hometown. The world is declining, and the innocent smiling faces that once were there have long since disappeared in this smoky little county. Living by one's own means is not respected, while spending extravagantly is sought after. In the circle of friends headed by Big Z, I can no longer see any energetic pursuit of dreams. All that is left in them is feasting and living in extravagance.

Rather than letting me go back to my hometown like this, it would be better for me to stay in the "village". At least I can write with peace of mind. Working hard can make me more spiritually full and live more comfortably.

In fact, not only my friends in my hometown, but also my relatives at home are one of the reasons why I don’t want to return to my hometown.

After the reform and opening up and the prosperity of my hometown, most of my relatives moved to the county. None of my cousins ??went to college except for me who took the national college entrance examination after working. My seven aunts and eight aunts still adhere to the old concept of "boys go to work early and girls get married early" even after the reform and opening up. They never regard learning as something that can change their destiny. In their view, the last way out of learning is just to go to work. Instead of spending a lot of energy and money to send their children to school, it is better to let them go to society as early as possible and provide family benefits. Reduce burden.

They live in their own little world and are unwilling to accept new things or be changed by new ideas. I remember that after I re-entered the college entrance examination, several relatives encouraged me in my parents' ears: "You are just looking at a married person and letting him fiddle around. The tuition fee is more than 5,000 yuan a year, so you are not willing to do it. Learn." What's the point of coming out? After working for so many years, is it possible that my child can still become a section chief with this crappy diploma? Those who farm are farmers, and those who work are people who work. It's all destiny. The thing is, Wang Erya from the next village and Xie Ergou from Xibian Town, why did they go to a crappy university? Why don’t they just come back and sit at home?” (These are pseudonyms, no reference is intended. Please tell me. Don't worry too much.)

Fortunately, I had been working for several years and had some savings. My parents suffered from being uneducated while working, so they asked me to study hard since I was a child. Before the company could get into trouble, there was already a big commotion at home.

In addition to going to school, there are other reasons why I dislike certain relatives, and that is "rushing marriage". After all, parents only have two mouths to urge marriage, and they are alone. But every New Year's day gathering of relatives is not that simple. Without Zhuge Liang's two brushes to fight with the Confucian scholars and his particularly strong mental quality, he would basically be dismissed. The quarrel between these seven aunts and eight aunts pushing for marriage pushed her to the brink of collapse.

I remember last year at the Spring Festival party, several aunts and their cousins’ children kept showing off in front of my parents, and from time to time they pretended to say something in front of my parents: < /p>

"Oh, my grandson, be careful, grandma is feeling distressed."

"Oh, kid, hurry up, this is your uncle, tell him to give up." Stop choosing, find a partner quickly..."

"Hey! I said sister~ Find a partner for your precious son, you see, I already have a grandson, you The progress is too slow..."

"My child, tell me, is it hard to find girls outside? Don't be so ambitious. Find them quickly. There are many in our village. Girl, I can't tell you anything, my aunt will step in and make sure no one picks you or anything..."

Faced with such insinuations, not to mention my parents being impatient, I felt ashamed. In their world, it seems that apart from getting married and having children, if you are studying for exams or if you want to start a career first, you are not doing your job properly. They all believe that if you don’t get married in your twenties, you either have a mental problem, a physical problem, or a psychological and physical problem. I don’t care whether you are living well or not. Anyway, you are not living as well as me. I have Grandson, you have no partner, you are rubbish, you are just rubbish...

The relatives at home always like to use their so-called good intentions to feed you chicken soup that is so poisonous that it can no longer be poisonous. At home, I became the target of public criticism. To put it bluntly, they are firstly afraid that you will have a better life than them, and secondly, they want to let you know that they have a better life than you.

Well, in the end, I have to admit that what they said is right. They are all happy, but I am miserable.

So, stop trying to save my terminally ill heart. It’s okay if I don’t go back...

The scenery is the beauty of my hometown, and the moon is the brightness of my hometown.

However, sometimes, it is enough to go back to your hometown and see the beautiful scenery. Those beautiful legends about your hometown have long since drifted away with the years.

There is a saying on the Internet that really resonates with me: What are we trying to live for? It’s to see the bigger world; it’s to have the opportunity to choose life freely; it’s so that you won’t bow to people you hate in the future; it’s so that when the person you like appears, you won’t feel so inferior that you can’t lift your head. Instead, he was full of confidence and said that sentence confidently: "I know you are good, but I am not bad either."

If the situation in your hometown is similar to mine, then I want to say a few words to you: Although we cannot change the status quo, we have the right to choose the status quo you want. If your hometown, relatives, and friends are all holding you back and forcing you to go in a direction of life you don’t like, then you’d better stay away as soon as possible. After all, we all want to do better, and no one wants to do worse.

Therefore, we must work hard, work hard, and work hard again. Try to take your parents with you to leave this messy circle as soon as possible and live a good life. Strive to create a growth environment with correct views and education for your future children. Strive to make your life more exciting and better.

As for the hometown that only gave you nightmares later on, if you really miss the moon there and the special snacks there, then there is no harm in picking a good day and taking your family back for a walk. ~

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