Joke Collection Website - Cold jokes - The Story of Water Margin Lin Chong
The Story of Water Margin Lin Chong
When two men looked at the monk, they wore a straight bow with a soap cloth, straddled a Buddhist monk's knife, raised a mord, and swung it up to beat the two men. When Lin Chong looked away, he recognized Lu Zhishen. Lin Chong quickly shouted, "Brother, don't do it. I have something to say." Zhishen heard this, so he stopped his mord. The two workers stayed for a long time, unable to move. Lin Chong said, "It's only because Gao Taiwei asked Liu Yuhou to pay two of his employees to kill me. Why don't they obey him?" If you kill them both, it's also a grievance. "
Lu Zhishen pulled out the Buddhist monk's knife and cut off the rope. He lifted Lin Chong up and called, "Brother, I have been worried about you since the day I bought the knife from you. Since you were sued, I have nowhere to save you. You've been asked about Cangzhou, but Cudgel can't find it before Kaifeng House. However, it was said that in the envoy's room, the bartender came to invite two men and said,' An official in the shop wants to talk.' I'm so suspicious that I can't let you go. I'm afraid these guys will harm you on the way, so I'll follow you in the future. See these two birds take you into the store, and Cudgel will rest there. At night, I heard that those two guys were playing tricks and earned your feet by boiling soup. At that time, I was going to kill these two birds, but there were many people in the inn, and I was afraid that I would be saved. Cudgel sees that these guys are up to no good, and the more they let you go. When you go out in the fifth watch, Cudgel comes to this forest first, and when you kill this fellow two birds, he comes here to harm you, just to kill this fellow two. "Lin Chong advised:" Since my brother saved me, don't harm his two lives. " Lu Zhishen shouted, "You two birds! When cudgel doesn't look at his brother's face, chop both of you into meat sauce; Look at your brother's face and spare your lives. " He put a Buddhist monk's knife in there and shouted, "You two birds! Hurry up, brothers, and come with cudgel. " Take the mord and go first. Two workers
dared to reply, only calling, "Coach Lin, save us both." According to the package on his back, he carried a fire and water stick and held Lin Chong. He also wrapped the package for him and followed him out of the Woods. Three or four miles away, I saw a small hotel at the entrance of the village, and four people came in and sat down. When I looked at the shop, I saw: Post Road in front and Xicun in the back. Several peach willows are green and shady, and several sunflower pomegranate red shadows are chaotic. Outside the door, there are dense hemp and wheat, and in front of the window, there are lotus flowers. Gently dance with wine and smell the wind, and the reed curtain will cover the cool day. Wall tile urn, white and cold full of village mash; Put a magnetic bottle on the shelf and start a new club. White-haired Tian Weng kissed the washing machine, and the girls in Hongyan Village laughed.
Now, Shen, Chong, Chao and Ba sit down in the village hotel, and ask the bartender to buy five or seven Jin of meat, make 2 jiao of wine to eat, and come back for some noodles to make cakes. The bartender sifted the wine while renovating. Two fellow monks asked, "Dare you ask the abbot in which temple?" Zhishen said with a smile, "What are you two birds asking about my place? Why not teach Gao Qiu what to do? Others are afraid of him, and I am not afraid of him. If cudgel bumps into that fellow, teach him to eat 3 mord sticks. " Two workers dare to speak again. I ate some wine and meat, packed my luggage, paid for the drinks, and left the village shop. Lin Chong asked, "Brother, where are you going today?" Lu Zhishen said, "To kill people, it is necessary to see the blood; to save people, it is necessary to save them thoroughly.". I won't let you go, and I'll send my brother straight to Cangzhou. " Hearing this, the two workers secretly said, "Bitter! But it ruined our business. How can we reply when we turn around? I have to follow him and go my own way. " There is a poem to prove it: I hate treachery and deceit in the daytime, and I only hold loyalty and thin gold. Far away, you are not afraid of thousands of miles, but you can survive in all of my heart.
Since then, Lu Zhishen has been asked to do whatever he wants, so he can rest whenever he wants. How dare he twist him? Scold if you are good, and fight if you are not good. The two workers were afraid to speak loudly, for fear that the monk would attack. After two trips, I got a car, and Lin Chong got on the bus, and three of them followed the car. Two workers are pregnant with ghosts, and each wants to save his life, so he has to be careful to follow suit. Lu Zhishen bought wine and meat all the way, and Lin Chong was relieved, and the two workers also ate. When I meet an inn, I leave early and go late. It's those two workers who strike a light and cook. Who dares to disobey him? The two of them secretly discussed: "We have been detained by this monk. If we go back tomorrow, Gao Taiwei will certainly be helpless." Xue overbearing: "I heard that there is a new monk named Lu Zhishen in Sokokuji Garden, and I think it must be him. Go back and tell the truth: I wanted to kill him in the wild pig forest, but I was saved by this monk and escorted all the way to Cangzhou, so I couldn't do it. Instead of returning him twelve taels of gold, Liu Qian went to find the monk himself. You and I just need to hide clean. " Dong Chao said, "That's right." The two secretly discussed the issue.
don't talk too much. After being detained by Zhishen for seventeen or eighteen days, it is only seventy miles away from Cangzhou. There are people all the way, and there is no seclusion. Lu zhishen found out the truth, so he took a rest in the pine forest. Zhishen said to Lin Chong, "Brother, it's not far from Cangzhou. There are people in the road ahead, and there is no secluded place to go. Cudgel has inquired about the truth. I'm breaking up with you now, and I'll meet you again some other day. " Lin Chong said, "Brother, when you go back, you can tell me about Mount Tai. You should be rewarded handsomely if you don't die." Lu Zhishen took out another one hundred and twenty taels of silver and gave it to Lin Chong, and gave three hundred and twenty taels to two officials: "You two birds! Ben cut off your two heads on the way, brother, and spared your two birds' lives. There are no more roads now, so don't worry. " "How dare you?" they asked. They are all sent by Qiu. " After receiving the money, but waiting for parting, Lu Zhishen looked at the two men: "Are the heads of you two birds as hard as this pine tree?" The two replied: "The little man's head is the flesh of his parents, wrapped in some bones." Zhishen swung his mord and knocked at the pine tree. The tree he hit had a two-inch deep mark, which was folded in unison. He shouted, "You two birds! But with evil intentions, I'll teach your head to be like this tree. " He waved his hand, dragged his mord and shouted, "Take care, brother." Since I went back. Dong Chao and Xue Ba all spit out their tongues and couldn't get in for a long time.
Lin Chong said, "Up and down, let's go by ourselves." Two men said, "What a rude monk! You broke a tree at once."
Lin Chong said, "What's so straight about this? A willow tree in Sokokuji will be uprooted. " Only by shaking their heads did they know it was true.
The three of them left the pine forest and walked until noon when they saw a hotel on the official road. But see: Gudao lonely village, roadside hotel. Yang Liuan, Xiao Chui Brocade; Lotus swings and the wind blows the green curtain. In front of Liu Ling's supine painting bed, Li Bai fell asleep and painted on the wall. Society encourages farmers' courage, and village mash helps farmers' capacity. Yu Pei, the immortal, once stayed, and Qing Xiang Jin Diao also came.
Three people came into the hotel, and Lin Chong let two public people sit first. Dong and Xue were at ease for half a day. I saw that there were several seats in that shop, and three or five bartenders sifting wine were all in a hurry, moving from east to west. Lin Chong sat with two workers for half an hour, but the bartender didn't ask. Impatient with waiting, Lin Chong knocked on the table and said, "You are a deceiver. When you see that I am a prisoner, you don't pay attention. What is the reason why I have to eat yours for nothing?" The host said, "You didn't know my kindness." Lin Chong said, "What's the good intention of not selling wine and meat to me?" The shopkeeper said, "You don't know that there is a rich man named Chai Mingjin in my village. He is called the Chief Officer of Chai here, and he is called Little Whirlwind in the Jianghu. He is a descendant of Chai Sejong in the Zhou Dynasty. Since Chen Qiao abdicated, Emperor Mao Wude has given him an affidavit. Who dares to bully him at home? Thirty or fifty brave men who are dedicated to recruiting people from all over the world are kept at home, and they often ask our hotel:' If there is a prisoner who has been sent here, you can ask him to come to our village, and I will help him.' I'm selling wine and meat to you now, and my face is red. He said that you have your own travelling expenses, so I won't help you. I mean well. Hearing this, Lin Chong said to the two men, "When I was teaching the army in Tokyo, I often heard the name of the military officer Chai, but it turned out to be here. Why don't we go to him? " Dong Chao and Xue Ba thought to themselves, "In that case, what have we lost?" So he packed his package and asked Lin Chong, "Hotel owner, where is Master Chai's manor? We are just looking for him." The shopkeeper said, "It's just ahead, about three or two miles away, and the big stone bridge is beating around the bush. That's the Dazhuangyuan."
Lin chong and others thanked the shopkeeper, and the three of them went out. Sure enough, three miles later, they saw a big stone bridge. Crossing the bridge, a flat road, I saw the manor in the shade of green willows. There is a Jian River all around, with weeping poplar trees on both banks, and a whitewashed wall in the shade. Turn around and come to the front of the village. When you look at it, what a big courtyard! But see: meet the ecliptic, and the mountain meets the Qinglong. Thousands of peaches bloom in Wuling Creek, and thousands of trees bloom in Jinguyuan. At Juxian Hall, there are strange flowers that don't thank at four o'clock; In front of Baihui Hall, there are eight festivals in Changchun. There is a gold medal in the hall, and there is an affidavit at home. Zhu Daibiwa,
with nine halls; Painting a building and carving a beam is really a delicate house. It's not the imperial family of the current dynasty, but also the family of the previous generation.
when the three men came to the villa, they found four or five villa guests sitting on the broad slab bridge, all enjoying the cool. When the three men came to the bridge and saluted the Zhuang guest, Lin Chong said, "Brother Xiang reported to the great official that there was a prisoner in the capital who was sent to the prison city, and his surname was Lin." Zhuang Keqi said, "You're not blessed. If you had wine, food and money at home, you went hunting this morning." Lin Chong said, "I wonder when you will be back?" "Maybe," said the guest, "I'm afraid to go to Dongzhuang to rest. You must not. " Lin Chong said, "So I'm not blessed and can't meet. Let's go."
after leaving the guests, I went back to the old road with two public servants, and my stomach was full of sadness. After walking more than half a mile, I saw a group of people galloping up from the depths of the forest, but I saw: everyone is handsome and beautiful, and everyone is a hero. Dozens of fine horses hiss and embroider flags on two or three sides to make the sun shine. Pink-green felt hat, like turning the lotus leaf upside down; Crimson red tassels, like rotten lotus flowers. In the flying fish bag, there is a thin light bow filled with golden finches; In the lion's pot, there are some green and carved arrows. Take a few dogs to drive the roe, and hold several pairs of rabbits and goshawks. Wear a velvet tapestry of Yunjun Stork, take off your hat and carve a brocade to find your finger. ? When the wind is good, the cold light is slightly exposed on the saddle side; Draw a drum group? Immediately, I heard a shock. Saddle tied, nothing more than birds from outer space; Lift it at once, it's full of animals in the mountains. It's like the king of Jin is in Zisai, as muddy as Hanwu to Changyang. The group of horses rushed up to the village, holding an officer in the middle, riding a snow-white curly horse. Immediately, the man was born with long eyebrows and phoenix eyes, white teeth and red lips, three teeth covering his mouth and moustache, and he was in his thirties and forties. Wearing a flower towel with a corner of soap yarn, an embroidered robe with a purple embroidered chest, an exquisite jade ring sash around the waist, and a pair of gold thread and green soap boots. Bring a bow, insert a pot of arrows, and lead the followers to the village. Lin Chong looked at it and thought, "Dare it be Chief Chai?" Afraid to ask him again, I only hesitated. I saw the young officer riding forward and asking, "Who is this man with a cangue?" Lin Chong hurriedly bowed down and replied, "My name is Lin, the head coach of the imperial army in Tokyo. Because I have wronged Gao Taiwei, I found out the matter and opened the government, asking for punishment and sending him to this Cangzhou. I heard from the hotel in front that there is a leading man named Chai, who is a talented and talented man, so I have come to be congenial. I don't expect to be shallow, so I can't meet. " The officer rolled his saddle and dismounted, flew near and said, "Chai Jin has missed his welcome." Just worship on the grass. Lin chong hurriedly resalute. The officer took Lin Chong's hand and walked with him to the village. When the guests saw this, they opened the door wide, and Chai Jin invited them to the front of the hall.
two courtesies. Chai Jin said, "I've heard a lot about the coach for a long time, but I didn't expect to come to visit the humble land today, which is enough to be my lifelong longing." Lin Chong replied, "I am humble, Lin Chong. I heard that adults are famous and spread Haiyu. Who is disrespectful? I don't want to be here because of criminals today, so I can get respect and honor, and I am lucky. " Chai Jin repeatedly self-effacing, Lin took the guest seat; Dong Chao and Xue Ba also sat around. With Chai Jin's attendants, they each took their horses and went to the courtyard to rest, not to mention. Chai Jin called the guest of the village and the wine. When I didn't move, I saw several Zhuang guests holding out a plate of meat, a plate of cakes and a pot of wine. Another plate, holding out a bucket of white rice, with ten dollars on it, will come out at once. When Chai Jin saw this, he said, "The villagers don't know how to compete with each other. How can the coach treat you lightly when he comes here? Go in quickly. Bring the fruit box wine first, then kill the sheep and treat each other quickly. " Lin Chong stood up and thanked him: "Sir, there is no need to give more. This is enough." Chai Jin said, "Don't say that. It's rare for the coach to come here, so how can you be contemptuous? " Zhuangke didn't dare to disobey his orders, so he held out the fruit box wine first. Chai Jin got up and held three cups in his hand. Lin Chong thanked Chai Jin and drank, and the two men drank together. Chai Jin said: "The coach please sit less inside." Chai Jin immediately untied the bow bag and arrow pot, and invited two workers to drink together. Chai Jin took the chair at the moment, Lin Chong took the guest seat, and two workers were under Lin Chong's shoulder. Tell some gossip, Jianghu activities, and you won't feel that the sun is setting in the west. Arrange wine, food, fruit and seafood, put them on the table and carry them in front of everyone. Chai Jin raised his glass himself, made three rounds, sat down and shouted, "Let's have the soup." After eating a soup and five or seven glasses of wine, I saw Zhuang Ke reporting: "The teacher is coming." Chai Jin said, "It's good to have a place to sit and meet. Bring a table quickly." When Lin Chong got up to look, he saw the teacher come in, wearing a headscarf askew and holding a breast, and came to the back hall. Lin Chong
thought, "When Zhuang Ke calls him a teacher, he must be the master of a great official." Hurriedly, he bowed down and sang, "Lin Chong would like to join us." The man ignored it all and didn't reciprocate. Lin did not dare to look up. Chai Jin pointed to Lin Chong and said to Hong Jiaotou, "This is Lin Chong, the instructor of 8, imperial guns and clubs in Tokyo. Please meet me." Lin Chong listened, looked at Hong Jiaotou and bowed. Coach Nahong said, "Hugh, get up." But you don't bow down. Chai Jin saw, in the heart very pleased!
Lin Chong bowed twice and got up to let Hong Jiaotou sit down. Hong Jiaotou also don't give way, then go to the first and sit down. Chai Jin saw it, but he didn't like it. Lin Chong had to sit under his shoulders, and so did the two workers.
Hong Jiaotou asked, "Why did the great officials pay so much attention to the troops today?" Chai Jin said, "This is the coach of the 8, imperial guards, and how can you treat him lightly?" Hong Jiaotou said, "Because the great officials are fond of guns and sticks, they often send soldiers to lean on grass and attach themselves to wood. They all say that I am a gun and stick teacher and come to the village to lure some wine, food and rice. How serious is the big official? " Lin Chong listened and kept silent. Chai Jin said: "A mortal can't look at each other, so don't underestimate him."
Hong Jiaotou blamed Chai Jin for saying, "Don't underestimate him", so he jumped up and said, "I don't believe him. He dares to show me a stick. I think he is the real coach." Chai Jin laughed: "All right! All right! Master Lin, how is your heart? " Lin Chong said, "I dare not." Hong Jiaotou thought to himself, "That man will never know, and his heart will be afraid first." Therefore, it is more and more irritating to Lin Chong. Chai Jin comes to see Lin Chong's skill; They wanted Lin Chong to beat him and silence the fellow. Chai Jin said, "Let's eat the wine until the moon comes up."
I've had five or seven glasses of wine now, but I came up early in the month and looked inside the hall like a day. Chai Jin got up and said, "Let's have a great match between the two coaches." Lin Chong thought to himself, "This Hong Jiaotou must be the master of Chai Daguan. I don't doubt that I will knock him down with a stick, so it will be ugly." Seeing that Lin Chong hesitated, Chai Jin said, "This Hong Jiaotou hasn't been here long, and there is no opponent here. Master Lin Wu has to refuse, and Xiao Ke is just about to see the skills of the two coaches. " Chai Jin said this, the original is Lin Chong hinder Chai Jin's face, refused to use his skill. Lin Chong was relieved when he saw Chai Jin talking straight. See Hong Jiaotou first got up and said
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