My friend asked me to talk about his advantages. Do you have any funny and humorous comments?

1. I regard money as dirt, and my father regards me as a septic tank

2. Everyone should love animals, especially those cooked

3. Gold will run out

4. To save water, it is best to take a bath with his girlfriend

5. Behind every successful man, there is always a woman, and behind every unsuccessful man, there are always two women. Sometimes you need a credit card.

7. Take good care of your neighbor, but don't let her husband know.

8. Money is not the problem, the problem is that there is no money.

9. Love at first sight, then decline, and then exhaust

1. Water can carry a boat, and porridge can also be cooked!

11. A tree without its skin will surely die; People are shameless and invincible in the world

12. Give me a woman and I can create a nation

13. Life is easy. Live, easy. Life is not easy

14. I heard that women are like clothes and brothers are like brothers. Looking back, I actually ran naked in too many cooks for 19 years.

15. One mountain can't accommodate two tigers unless a male and a female

16. Doing nothing doesn't matter, it doesn't matter and doing everything

17. If eating more fish can make people smart, then I must have at least eaten it. 2-year-old dreams, 3-year-old hard work. At the age of 4, he is basically oriented, and at the age of 5, he is popular everywhere. Playing mahjong at the age of 6, wandering around at the age of 7. 8-year-old lesbians often hang on the wall at the age of 9

19. They can't play chess, calligraphy and painting, and they are tired of washing and cooking

2. Maybe it seems to be, but not necessarily

21. The night gave me a pair of black eyes, but I rolled my eyes with them

22. Angels can fly because they take themselves lightly

I'm afraid hooligans are literate.

25. You can't satisfy everyone, because not all people are human.

26. It's easy to drive, and I'm afraid there will be new people.

27. If something goes wrong, look for the reason from yourself first, and don't blame the earth for its lack of gravity when you are constipated.

28. When a man meets a woman, there will be only a memorial day, but no independence day.

29. Between lovers, when it comes to feelings, it hurts money

31. In those days, I was poor all my life without going to college, but now I am poor immediately after going to college

32. In the past, first-class students went abroad, second-rate students took postgraduate entrance examinations, and third-rate students got employment. Now, first-rate students got employment, second-rate students went abroad, and third-rate students took postgraduate entrance examinations

33. Customers are not gods, but just fooled

34. Because we will die for a long time

35. Don't believe in love at first sight, because you can't see at a glance how much money each other earns

36. Higher vocational education is not as good as high salary, high salary is not as good as long life, and long life is not as good as happiness

37. Being angry is to punish yourself with other people's mistakes

38. Sometimes explanations are unnecessary-enemies don't believe your explanations, and friends don't need you. -an advertisement for breast augmentation products/don't even think about it (Lenovo) ---HP's advertisement attacking Lenovo

4. How much sorrow can you have, just like a eunuch going to a brothel

41. Life is nothing more than making others smile, and occasionally smiling at others

42. It's not that I'm careless, but that I deliberately

43. There are fewer and fewer good men

45. When you put on the wedding dress of love, I also put on the monk's cassock

46. God created men to make him lonely, while women were created to make him more lonely

47. There may be several women who don't eat, but there is not even one who is not jealous

Save me ten books

5. As long as it's not obscene, we are the mainstream

51. The forest is so big that I can't find a tree to hang

52. Animals still have a little pity, but I don't have any, so I'm not an animal

53. Sleep is an art-no one can stop me from pursuing art

I'll hold the wall

56. I'm like a fly lying on the glass. The future is bright, but I can't find a way out

57. I'll make friends with whoever says I'm white, thin and beautiful

58. The effect of contraception: if I don't succeed, I'll become an adult

59. It's not necessarily a monk who burns incense, but a panda

6. Teacher, you can accept it from the old.