Joke Collection Website - Cold jokes - Summary of Qin Shihuang's bidding documents
Summary of Qin Shihuang's bidding documents
Build the Great Wall, houses and tombs. Burn books to bury Confucianism, practice cruel tyranny, and serve the people all over the world like dogs. Some people call it the first tyrant in the world.
Him!
Sweep the six countries and unify the whole country. Abolishing the system of enfeoffment, establishing counties, unified measurement and coins, making the language of books consistent, cars running on the same track, and creating legislation, which lasted for two thousand years and made great contributions.
It is no exaggeration to say that he is cruel and heartless, ignoring human life, but he is receptive and generous.
The faint palace wall, the long alley and the lonely night are just one person and one shadow. His dynasty, his life, no queen. Until his death, he was buried in a cold tomb, with only a pool of silver water beside his pillow, silent.
Him!
This is a mystery.
Chapter One Rushing in the Rain
This year, Yi Jian was twelve years old.
The story begins with a late-night heavy rain in Handan, Zhao. A thunder woke Ekin Cheng. Her name is Third Sister, Third Sister, are you awake? Third sister Yi Ying came from the next room wearing clothes. She said angrily, can this keep you awake? Yi just chuckled, and Yi Ying asked, Do you want to light a lamp? No, Yi Jian shook his head. Third sister, I hate thunder. It's so scary. Third sister, sleep with me. Say that finish, she got into the quilt.
Move in. Yi Ying patted her on the head and lay down on the outside of the bed.
When ugly, it was raining cats and dogs outside, hitting the eaves hard and making a muffled crash. Yi Jian can't sleep. She touched Third Sister's arm with her hand and said, Third Sister, you are so slippery. I like sleeping with you. There is still a smell. Did you powder it? Let's go Yi Ying pushed her hand, and the elder sister and the second sister just put on powder. Hee hee ... Jane yi smiled again. If I were a man, I would marry all three of you and warm me up every day when I go home. It's beautiful. Third sister laughed with her.
Handan in early spring is really cold, and the thin cold air seems to stab my bones. When I think of my sister, Yi Jian stops talking, and I can't forget her hot chest in my impression. In the evening, at her home in Xinzheng, the capital of South Korea, she felt cold that day and sneaked into her sister's wing. After waking up, she touched her cold feet and wrapped them in her arms with a smile.
Memories are also fixed at that moment.
At this moment, at the end of the corridor of this strange and festive mansion, my sister sleeps in her new bedroom. However, Yi Jian can't go there at will, because there is another man beside her. He is her husband and her brother-in-law. This feeling is very strange for Jane Yi in her girlhood. Her sister slept with a man.
What they will do and what they will say is certainly unknown to Yi Jian. She came to see me off with Third Sister, and she has to stay in Zhao for a while before she can leave, mainly after Third Sister has finished the first three trips. My sister's marriage is not up to her father, because South Korea has many beauties and few territories since ancient times, so South Korean kings are used to intermarry and arrange their women for the nobles of neighboring countries to show their friendship.
Yi Jian was thinking about her sister when suddenly there was a rush of footsteps outside the door. From far to near, the sound becomes more and more noisy. After a while, the light outside the window lit up and someone walked by with a lantern. Yi Jian sat up quickly, and Yi Ying immediately rubbed his eyes and wondered, Hey, what's the matter? Okay, why is there someone in the corridor? Go and see. Yi Jian got out of bed, walked to the door, pushed open a crack in the door, and the light in the corridor immediately came in. Yi Ying followed him to the door, and they looked out together.
The heavy rain is still falling, and it is magnificent. Rain splashed along the eaves on the wooden edge of the floor outside the corridor. Although it is the third night after the wedding, the wedding red yarn is hung everywhere on the top beam of the lobby connected to the corridor. But now, it doesn't go well with these reds. Some people are in the hall. They are carrying lanterns and wearing blue hemp fibers and hats on their heads. Nice atmosphere.
In a short time, at the end of the corridor, there was a sudden sound of heavy footsteps, and the lobby immediately quieted down. The previous noise suddenly disappeared, like the sound of hemp fiber. Yi Jian was behind the door and turned to the end of the corridor. It was my sister's new bedroom, just the owner of footsteps, not my sister.
He is a tall and stalwart man. Even in the middle of the night, his eyes are like burning fireballs. The long black hair is scattered on the shoulders at the moment, less violent during the day, but more moist than ever. Hard facial features, until the bottom of the lips, a ferocious wound, destroyed all perfection.
He came from the end of the corridor, and the hemp fiber man standing in the middle of the lobby was greeted at once. With a hint of anxiety, he whispered: General, something happened in Yi 'an, and Qin Jun is approaching the city gate. Your majesty is waiting for the general to enter the palace to discuss in detail. Qin Jun ... On hearing these two words, Yi Jian's heart suddenly trembled. Although young, about Qin Jun, neighboring Qin, and the battle of Changping more than ten years ago, Qin Jun buried 400,000 troops of Zhao alive ... 400,000 were buried alive by the terrible Jedi in a blink of an eye, leaving a suffocating shadow and fear for people in other countries.
The whole room was silent and everyone was waiting for him to speak. After a strange silence, he suddenly waved to the opposite coir man and said, Zhao? #9 1; There is no need to discuss it in the palace. You immediately take hundreds of Handan troops to camp in Yi 'an. No matter how provocative Qin Jun is, you are not allowed to fight back. General, if you don't go to the palace, I'm afraid you will be delayed. Zhao? #9 1; Some scruples.
Zhao? #9 1; He narrowed his eyes. How many years have you been with me? Yes, the subordinates will lead their troops to camp in Yi 'an. A forceful answer. The heavy rain gradually stopped, and the group of coir men filed out of the lobby with lanterns and walked into the foggy night. The footsteps faded away. When the lobby was quiet in the middle of the night, the lights at the end of the corridor lit up again. Yi Jian saw her sister dressed and came out, accompanied by a night watchman.
ZIMMUR! My sister called him that, and her voice was full of infinite tenderness. Are you leaving now? She asked lightly, her eyes reflecting the attachment and shyness of the newly married woman.
He looked at her, silent, tall and straight figure like a wall in the cool wind, strong and heavy. My sister's expectant eyes are full of mist. After a long time, he finally nodded slightly, reached out his big hand and gently touched her head. Then he pushed his sister into his broad arms.
This hug is too deep for Yi Jian to understand, but at this moment, under the dim light, his calm and gloomy expression and his dark eyes are facing Ekin Cheng behind the rosewood door, which has completely left a mark on her girl's heart and will never be erased.
He is my sister's husband, Yi Jian's brother-in-law, the Xiongnu general guarding North Zhao, and Li Mu.
Early in the morning, under the constant serious agitation outside, Yi Jian and Yi Ying stayed up almost all night, and there were people walking in the corridor, talking softly. The heavy rain finally stopped and it was cloudy in March. Before they got up, the door was suddenly pushed open from the outside.
It's sister. She came in with two thin long coats hanging from her arms and her usual little smile on her face. Seeing her sister coming, she stood up from the sofa and eagerly asked, Sister, does Zhao want to fight? Has the brother-in-law left? Did you hear that? Big sister Yiji was surprised.
Well, Jane nodded, and Third Sister and I heard it. Yi Jian, Yi Ying, get up. After breakfast, the general's men will take you back to North Korea. Don't you have to wait until you come back three times? Yi Ying asked.
I can't take care of it. Handan city is in chaos now. Many people are going to leave the city, and they are afraid that they will not be able to go out in the future. Yi Ji put her thin coat on the edge of the sofa and added: The weather in Handan is colder than that in Xinzheng. I made two clothes. Yiying, you wear this pink one. It's bigger. Sister, then come back with us. Jane yi can't help but say.
Nonsense, Yi Ji said with a smile: Elder sister is married to Zhao and the general now. How can she go back with you? She will be laughed at. But now Zhao is going to fight, and the Qin people are coming. Yi Jian is most afraid of the Qin people.
Don't worry, Yi Jian, followed by Third Sister Yi Ying, brother-in-law is a general, and Huns are all afraid of him. With my brother-in-law, Zhao will be fine and Handan will be fine. Everything will be fine. Yi Ji pursed her mouth and stared out of the window with blurred eyes. Two hours ago, before dawn, she watched him leave, rode on his horse, rushed back to Yanmen County in the north, and mobilized the main frontier defense force to meet the Handan army ... Really, she was very happy to marry him, but after the celebration, she was more worried and reluctant. His life is destined to shine the sharpest light on the battlefield.
The saddest thing is to leave.
After breakfast, Yi Jian and Yi Ying got into the general's carriage. In addition to the coachman's groom, there are two guards riding alone, who were specially arranged by the general to send them back to South Korea. The elder sister, Ikey, stood at the door. In the wind, her long hair was blown away and intertwined with the fallen leaves in mid-air, which was a cool smell.
Yi Jian didn't say a word while the carriage was driving. Yi Ying poked her head out of the curtain and kept waving to her sister. Yiji told her from a distance, be careful on the road, be filial to your parents when you go back, and don't make them angry ... Yi Ying nodded in agreement, but she didn't forget to turn her head and say to Yi Jian: Little thing, why don't you sit here and say goodbye to your sister? Sister can get married in Zhao. Later, we may not know when we can meet again. No, Yi Jian turned his head to one side. I hate saying goodbye. You hate too many things. Third sister Yi Ying is a little dissatisfied. Sister is closest to you, otherwise it's not your turn to see the bride off. Second sister is coming, too Yi Jian stopped talking, but she felt a little sad. Of course, she doesn't want to say goodbye to her sister, but she feels embarrassed and afraid that she can't control her tears, which will definitely make them laugh. So simply, she closed her eyes and fell asleep on the pillow. No matter what Third Sister says, she can't hear you. Anyway, Handan is not far from Xinzheng.
It rained wildly in the evening of March, and the carriage drove on the official road until the evening, and it became gloomy again. Soon, the heavy rain raged again, and the driver couldn't help speeding up. Yi Jian pulled open the curtain, and the two guards on the side had put on the hemp fiber, but the rain still flowed down their heads to their faces.
Fortunately, after more than half an hour, the carriage finally pulled into the station. It's not dark yet, but the station is quite deserted because of the heavy rain. The driver slowed down and slowly put the horse into the yard of the station. At this time, when the carriage turned the corner, no one noticed it except Ekin Cheng, who was lifting the curtain and looking out of the car.
On the back of the road, in the corner of the post station, a shadow was completely soaked by the pouring rain. Not far from the shadow, a tall horse with a black mane and moustache was equally dim in the rain, and its combative head drooped ... At a glance, the carriage had passed and entered the post office gate.
All the wind and rain were shut out of the door, and a canopy was set up above the yard of the post station. The horses of the post passengers were sparsely tied in the shed, which was very quiet. When the carriage stopped, Yi Jian immediately jumped down from it and jumped on the stone stairs in the yard. Yi Ying subconsciously gave her a white look and said, Steady, what should I do if I fall? Third Sister, Yi Jian turned her eyes to the door behind her and said, I just saw a man sitting in the corner outside, all wet, and it was raining so hard outside. Zhao is going to war, and there will be more homeless people in the future. Mind your own business. Oh! Yi Jian should be a cry.
At this time, the page in the station greeted them from the room and greeted them with food and shelter. A group of people sat down in the back hall, and steaming food was served immediately. It was dinner time, and almost all the postmen gathered in the hall. Although there were not many people, it was lively for a while.
The page made a pot of wine for all the men, probably drunk. Suddenly, someone patted the table and shouted, Qin is really deceiving others. It has repeatedly attacked our state of Zhao! You see, now that Qin Jun is outside Yi 'an, he still keeps saying that he wants to practice Confucianism. How much does this cruel country know about Confucianism? It was Lv Buwei who said that he should respect Confucianism, not the king of Qin. Yes, I really want to respect Confucius, and I specially went to Qi State to ask Mr. Wang to be Qin's teacher. How can a useless and ambitious person be a vegetarian? After drinking, these people became excited. Even the groom and two guards joined in a heated conversation, talking about Qin, Zhao, the coming war and Zhao's general Li Mu. Listening to them talking about his brother-in-law, Yi Ying also became interested, listening to the record of his brother-in-law attacking Xiongnu.
Very imposing.
As for Yi Jian, she couldn't sit still. Seeing that they were talking so vigorously, she got up and went outside. After a day's carriage ride, she felt sore all over. Standing in the yard, she adjusted her thin light blue coat and glanced at the post office door. She simply took out the bamboo umbrella from the carriage and rolled up her skirt.
Pushing open the wooden door, the rainstorm instantly poured down from above and hit the umbrella, making a snapping sound. Yi Jian walked out of the station with an umbrella carefully, and the cool wind blew on his forehead and into his neck along the neckline, which made people tremble. The weather is really cold. Go around the back along the eaves of the wall After a while, Yi Jian's shoes were all wet.
Psst-a horse barking. Realizing that someone was coming, the fierce horse not far away immediately raised his head warily, but the man sitting in the corner still sat motionless, dressed in black like a layer of water paper and looked like a shadow from a distance. It was already dark, so Yi Jian leaned over with an umbrella and squatted down beside him.
His eyes first came into contact with an eardrop on his left ear, a crimson teardrop-shaped blood jade, which was transparent and crystal clear in the rain, shining with strange cold light.
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