Joke Collection Website - Cold jokes - A short story of ordinary people
A short story of ordinary people
In the short stories of routine people, many people can't chat and make girls happy, so they are doomed to fail to get a girlfriend. Sometimes a humorous way of chatting and paying attention to some chat routines can make you have a better female popularity. The following is a short story of routine people.
One day, the cow gave the donkey a difficult problem and asked which of the two bugs under the word "stupid" was male and which was female. The donkey racked his brains, but he still couldn't answer. Cow scolds: What a donkey, male left and female right! Don't you know such a simple truth? How do you tell stories to make others happy?
Seven years after graduation, I finally took on a big project, to build a 30-meter chimney. The construction period is two months, and the cost is 300,000, but it still needs funding. It was finally finished at the end of last year. Today, people went to check and accept, and they were scolded to death. There is no money yet! As a result, the drawings were read backwards, and people were going to dig wells!
3. How did the doctor ask the patient about the fracture? The patient said, I felt sand in my shoes, so I shook my shoes with a telephone pole. One of them passed by and thought I was electrocuted, so he picked up a stick and gave me two! Haha, this is really a classic humorous story and joke that amuses girls!
The tortoise is hurt. Let snails buy medicine. Two hours later. The snail hasn't come back yet. The tortoise was in a hurry to scold: if I don't come back, I will die! At this time, the snail's voice came from outside the door: you said I wouldn't go! Haha, you see snails just crawl slowly, and very slowly!
5, someone keeps a pig, hates it, dislikes it, but the pig knows the way back, and it is useless to dislike it. One day, he drove a lot of cars and abandoned the pig. He called home late at night and asked, "Is the pig coming back?" Answer: "I have come back!" " It growled, "put it on the phone, I'm lost!" Haha, do you think the pig will still answer the phone?
6. The elephant accidentally stepped on the ant nest, and the ants that built their nest climbed on the elephant. The elephant shook its body and the ants fell down. At this time, there was another elephant around its neck, and the fallen ant shouted "strangle it, strangle it, strangle it". Haha, can ants still strangle elephants?
7. One morning in computer class, a row of classmates' computers crashed. So a classmate stood up and said, "Teacher, the computer crashed, and our platoon was all dead." At this time, many students said, "We are dead, too." Then the teacher asked, "Who else is not dead?" Only one classmate stood up and said, "I'm not dead yet!" " "The teacher said strangely," the whole class is dead. Why don't you die? "
8. Before eating peanuts, monkeys should put peanuts in their buttocks before taking them out. The administrator explained: Someone once fed it peaches, but the peach core could not be pulled out. The monkey is afraid. You must measure it before eating now. Ha ha ha, this is a typical result-oriented intelligent monkey. It's really good!
9. When I was a sophomore, all the girls in the dormitory liked Emil Wakin Chau's songs, and one tape was borrowed by everyone. One day, the girl in the upper bunk asked: Where is my Emil Wakin Chau? The girl in the lower bunk replied, It's in my bed! There was silence for two seconds, and then everyone fell on the bed and laughed. Haha, sister, are you here to be funny?
10. The chimpanzee accidentally stepped on the stool pulled by the gibbon. After the gibbon cleaned it gently and carefully, they fell in love. People ask how they are together. Chimpanzees said with emotion: ape dung! It's all ape shit! Yes, the result is really the so-called fate, hahaha!
Story of routine 2 1. Once upon a time, there was a temple on a mountain. There is an old monk and a young monk in the temple. One day, the old monk told a story to the young monk. He said: once upon a time, there was a mountain and a temple on it. There is an old monk and a young monk in the temple. One day, the old monk told a story to the young monk. (Infinitely repeated).
2.M: I really want to see the new movie What What?
W: Really, I heard it's ok, blabla.
Do you want to come along?
M: The one on XX Street is delicious.
Woman: Really? I haven't been there.
M: Let's go together another day.
4. A long time ago, the tortoise and the rabbit ran a race. The rabbit runs very fast, leaving the tortoise far behind. The rabbit ran for a while, thinking that the tortoise must not catch up with itself. So I decided to have a rest and fell asleep under a tree, but the tortoise didn't give up. It runs very hard. When the rabbit woke up, it was almost over!
The rabbit began to run in a hurry and ran faster and faster. Duang crashed into a tree and died.
5. Once upon a time, there was a mountain. There is a temple in the mountains. There is an old monk and a young monk in the temple. One day, the old monk brought back a turtle from the outside and said to the young monk, "I'm going down the mountain to beg for alms now." Please take care of the tortoise for me. "
The young monk took advantage of the old monk's coming down the mountain to make alms, boiled the turtle and left its shell on the table. When the old monk came back and saw the turtle shell, he asked the young monk, "Where is my turtle?" The young monk said, "I'm telling a story to the tortoise!" " "
The short story of routine people 3. Ask and answer the whole routine:
1, ask: "Who are our father and son?" The other person will definitely answer, "Of course it's my father and your son!" The result of the routine is that "my dad" is "your son", which means he is your grandson. )
2. Q: "Have you ever heard the story of a fool saying he doesn't know, a fool nodding and a fool shaking his head?" The result of the routine is that whether he answers "I don't know", "shaking his head" or "nodding", he will follow your routine. )
3. Q: What would you do if there was a 1 booth in front of your house? Option 1: surprise, option 2: alarm (routine result: option 1 means "eat a catty" and option 2 means "hug Baba")
4. Q: "Are you my best friend?" The other party's affirmative answer: Yes, you answer: It is said on TV that dogs are man's best friends (routine result: you are a dog! )
5. Q: "Do you think boys who paint their nails are not girls?" The boy replied: Mom, you answered: "Hello, mom is here, my son is good!" " (Routine result: Call your mother! )
6. ask, "the roaring dog is a god on earth, so what's next?" Answer: I am a dog!
7. Q: "Let me ask you a question:' I have ten knives and I lost two. How many? Answer: Eight (father's homonym), you can say yes directly.
8. Q: "Let me ask you a short math question. What is 7+ 1? " You can just say yes. )
9. Q: "Do you usually wipe your ass with your left hand or your right hand after going to the toilet?" The other person will definitely think about it and answer: "Right hand or left hand", and you will answer "We usually wipe our ass with paper" (he wipes his ass with his hand)
10, q: "What does the seller of a certain treasure call the customer?" The other party replied: kiss (just kiss decisively, this routine is suitable for couples! )
1 1, q: "I ask you a question, and you just need to answer whether you know it or not." The other party replied: OK. Are you asking, "Does your family know you are so stupid?" Whether he answered yes or no, he admitted that he was stupid. )
12, ask, "Say it ten times …" and then ask, "Are you different from a pig? Answer quickly! " The other party "didn't" (meaning he is a pig. Many people are trapped by this routine. )
13. When asked "I'll give you a magic trick to make you forget that you are a pig", the other party replied "I'm not a pig at all". You replied, "Do you think you have forgotten now? The magic succeeded! "
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