Reporting Autumn Zong Pu

‘What do you want from the transportation to Huagai…. The rich man rewarded the meal, the idler took oil, stole half the couplet, and all the miserable people asked for it.' and so on. "According to this, on October 5th, Yu Dafu hosted a banquet for his brother Yu Hua in Jufeng Garden, and asked Lu Xun to accompany him. Xianren ("Sanxian Collection·Preface") said: "I will compile the materials collected when compiling "A Brief History of Chinese Novels" , printed as "Novel Old News Notes", in order to save the censorship of young people, I used the name of the proletariat to refer to "youlei" and there are three "youlei"...", so the essays were The collection is called "San Xian Ji", and he also calls himself "Xianren". He modestly calls it a limerick. There are three theories for stealing half a couplet: 1. Comrade Guo Moruo thinks that it is borrowed from Qian Jizhong's "A full meal is a good thing for a ruzi ox". , not a half couplet but a half sentence, see note ④. 2. Borrowing the poem of Nanshe poet Wan Yao Huanchu (Xi Gou) "The old hat covers the face in the busy city." 3. Comrade Xiong Rong provided that Lu Xun was at a banquet that day, and Yu Dafu made a joke. "Have you been working hard these days?" Lu Xun answered him with the "Hengmei" couplet that he had thought of the previous day. Dafu joked:

How should we explain "self-deprecation"? "Self-deprecation". Such topics have their origins. There is a category called "Construction" in "Selected Works", which includes Dongfang Shuo's "Answering Guests", Yang Xiong's "Jie Moo", and Ban Gu's "Answering Guests". These three titles include There is ridicule and drama. The first chapter "Answering Guests is Difficult" is to explain the guest's ridicule. It is not "self-mockery" and is different from "self-mockery". However, "Hanshu·Dongfang Shuo" says: " Because it is said that it is difficult for oneself to be a guest, and to use one's position to comfort oneself, Dongfang Shuo assumes that a guest is teasing oneself. It is not that the guest is really teasing oneself, or oneself is teasing oneself, and then it is up to oneself to answer. Yang Xiong. "Explanation of Mocking", Ban Gu's "Taobin Xi", and Han Yu's "Jinxue Jie" are all the same. They all assume that someone is mocking themselves. In fact, they are mocking themselves, and then they answer it by themselves. Therefore, "Selected Works of Literature". "" Dongfang Shuo and other three articles are called "essays", indicating that the guest who mocks himself is the author's assumption, that is, the author's self-deprecation is divided into two parts, one part is to laugh at oneself, and the other part is to answer. Self-mockery and self-explanation are just a matter of mockery and self-explanation in form.

Lu Xun's "Self-mockery" was adapted from this kind of "explanatory mockery" article. It is actually self-mockery and self-explanation, and is called "self-mockery". In fact, "self-mockery" in the past is divided into two parts: self-mockery and self-explanation. Lu Xun's "self-mockery" is also divided into two parts, "self-mockery" in the past. Let’s first assume that the guest is asking himself questions to mock himself. Lu Xun’s “Self-mockery” also asks questions first to mock himself, such as “What do you want if you are lucky enough to be handed over to the canopy?” This is actually a question. What else can you ask for after you have handed over the canopy? In the past, articles that "explained ridicule" all included words that ridiculed oneself, such as Dongfang Shuo's "lips rotten and teeth falling", Yang Xiong's "official extension", Ban Gu's "Yu Ti Heng Men", Han Yu's "Postscript" "If you go ahead and stop trouble later, you will get blamed at every turn", "It's useless to race to death if the head is full of teeth". Lu Xun also had similar "self-mockery", such as "I have already met my head before I dared to stand up", he was afraid of meeting with "the weak body Hengmen", and " "Before and after the postscript, you are prone to blame" are similar; "A broken hat covers the face" is a description of oneself, which is the same as "lips and teeth are rotten" and "head and teeth are chipped" are also described as oneself. This is the self-deprecating part.

In the past, "Jie Mo" was often written with its own identity. For example, Dongfang Shuo said, "Ji is the same as Fan Li, and Zhong is loyal to Zixu." "Laughing phoenix", compared to the phoenix, Ban Gu said, "the wall of the He family",

"it lasts for thousands of years but shines brightly". Lu Xun also had a sarcastic remark, that is, "with a cold eyebrow and a thousand fingers, one bows his head and is willing to be a bully". Its profound meaning has been fully elucidated by Chairman Mao, and it is naturally far beyond that of his predecessors. Therefore, "Self-mockery" contains a self-mockery part, and it is not like the explanation cited above that "self-mockery" is a twist and "a satire on the enemy." Saying that one has good fortune and good fortune, but one does not dare to stand up and cover one's face with one's hat. How is this a "quick pen" and a mockery of the enemy? Isn't saying that one has good luck with good fortune does not mean that one has good luck with good fortune? How can one ridicule the enemy by saying that one has good luck with good fortune? "Self-mockery" also has a self-explanatory part, and not every sentence is self-mockery.

Of course, Lu Xun's "Self-mockery" is very different from the predecessors' "Explanation of Mockery", both in form and content. The predecessors used to laugh at oneself, but Lu Xun only called it "self-mockery". This is a different proposition. The ancients mocked others to express their grievances, and used self-explanation to gain status. This was mainly to ridicule themselves. They did not dare to touch the feudal rulers for their own grievances, and it also had the function of beautifying the feudal rulers.

Lu Xun's "Self-mockery" is a revolutionary poem that dares to stab the Kuomintang reactionaries. It shows his contempt for the enemy and his determination to fight to the end for the revolutionary cause. So what's the point of comparing it to the predecessors' "Explanation of Mockery"? This just shows the development of Lu Xun's creation, just like Lu Xun's "My Broken Love" has inherited and developed. Pointing this out will help us understand the title "Self-mockery" and make it more consistent with the reality of the poem.

The second is the explanation of the last couplet: "Hide in the small building and become one, regardless of winter, summer, spring and autumn." One said, "The last two sentences are a satire on those people at that time who only cared about their own comfort and did not care about politics." The second theory is a satire on the Kuomintang reactionaries who moved their capital to Luoyang during the January 28th Incident in 1932 and did not move back to Nanjing until December. The author had not yet moved back when he wrote this poem. Three said, "'Hiding in a small building' once again expresses the idea of ??'trench warfare' that Lu Xun has always advocated. The 'small building' is a bunker fortification and a trench on the front line. Hiding in a small building and taking advantage of the opportunity to attack is for the better." Preserve yourself, attack the enemy, and destroy the enemy. "Fourth theory" "Chengyitong" means to form a unified unit, and to oppose the Chiang family dynasty. Although the "small building" is small, it is an outpost in the struggle against the proletariat. The entire revolutionary struggle of the class is linked together.”

Look again at what the predecessors said in the latter part of “Jie Mo.” Dongfang Shuo said, "Although time is not used, I still have no disciples, and I live alone"; Yang Xiong said, "I am lonely and lonely, and I am a house of virtue"; Ban Gu said, "Practice your aspirations carefully, and guard your heavenly talismans." ". They all talk about being content with loneliness and being able to protect yourself, not to ridicule others. It is inappropriate to say that satire is not about politics. The main thing to be satirized is the enemy. It is a matter of education for those who are not interested in politics, not to satirize them. Lu Xun's "hiding in a small building" is similar in form to the predecessors' "living alone" and being content with loneliness. Of course, the spirit of the two is completely different. The former is about retreat, and the latter is about fighting.

How to fight by "hiding in a small building"? Is it to use the small building as a trench for trench warfare? We only know that when the enemy invades the city for street warfare, we hide in the small building to fight in the street. The small building serves as cover to attack the enemy. When Lu Xun fought for counter-cultural "encirclement and suppression", how could he use a small building as a trench? When fighting for counter-cultural "encirclement and suppression", he must use newspapers and periodicals as a fighting position to attack the enemy. If he leaves the fighting position of newspapers and periodicals, even if he hides in a small building, How to attack the enemy? Lu Xun's trench warfare was his use of various pen names when writing essays about battles. To confuse the enemy, he used various ingenious artistic techniques to blind the enemy's eyes when writing combat essays. In this way, he covered himself and attacked the enemy, instead of "hiding in a small building" to save himself and attack the enemy. The third theory may not be consistent with reality. The Fourth Theory believes that "hiding in a small building" means holding on to one's position, and "unifying" means being connected with the entire revolutionary struggle of the proletariat. But the original sentence is about "hiding in a small building" to become unified, that is, hiding in a small building and becoming unified. It does not mean that the small building is used as a stronghold and then connected with the revolutionary base area to become unified. It is precisely because hiding in a small building to dominate the world that it corresponds to "Don't worry about winter, summer, spring and autumn." No matter what the political climate of the outside world is, don't worry about it! That means don’t care. If the small building as a stronghold is connected with the entire revolutionary struggle of the proletariat, then we have to pay close attention to the political climate of the outside world. How can we ignore it? Therefore, the fourth theory cannot help but go too far.

So what do these two sentences mean? Lu Xun was under persecution by the reactionaries and was often in hiding, so hiding in a small building became my way to dominate the world. No matter how the political climate outside changed, This is "self-mockery", but it is not limited to self-mockery. It is also a satire that the Kuomintang reactionaries only know how to avoid, no matter how dangerous the motherland is. These two sentences are not only "self-deprecating", but also use "self-deprecating" to violently attack the enemy and hit the enemy's vital point. This shows that "self-deprecating" is the battle of the revolution. These two sentences are a powerful combination with the couplet "Hengmei Lengdui".

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The art of self-deprecation

Korean people laugh at themselves and say: "In South Korea, there are many people selling golf balls. "There are very few people who can really play golf."

Americans laugh at themselves: "In the United States, there are many people who help basketball stars in lawsuits, but there are very few people who can really play basketball."

< p>Fans said: "In China, there are many people who tell fortunes for the Chinese football team, but few who can actually play football."

Humor has always been called a language art that only smart people can master, and Self-deprecation is also called the highest state of humor. It can be seen from this that those who can laugh at themselves must be the wisest among wise and the master among masters.

Self-deprecation is a technique that people who lack self-confidence dare not use because it requires you to scold yourself. That is to say, one should "make fun of" one's own mistakes, shortcomings and even physical defects. Instead of covering up or avoiding the ugly and shameful parts, one should amplify, exaggerate and analyze them, and then cleverly extend them, justify them, and get a smile. It is impossible to do this without an open-minded, optimistic, detached, and playful attitude and mind. It is conceivable that people who are self-righteous, calculating, and sarcastic are difficult to compare to. Laughing at yourself doesn't hurt anyone, it's the safest thing to do. You can use it to liven up the conversation and eliminate tension; to find a way out of embarrassment and save face; to gain human touch in public situations; to insinuate under special circumstances and prick the unreasonable villain.

1． Tickling yourself and laughing

In interpersonal communication, when you are embarrassed in front of others or in an embarrassing situation, using self-deprecation to deal with the embarrassment not only makes it easy to find steps, but also often produces humorous effects. Therefore, laughing at yourself, tickling yourself a few times, and laughing first is a very clever way to escape.

It is said that in ancient times, there was a scholar Shi who accidentally fell to the ground while riding a donkey. Most people would be at a loss, but this scholar stood up calmly and said: "Thankfully I am a scholar Shi." , If it's made of tiles, why don't you break it into pieces?" A witty remark made everyone present laugh, and naturally Shi Xuetu was spared the embarrassment in the laughter. By analogy, if a fat man falls down, you can say: "If it weren't for the weight of the body, wouldn't the bones be broken?" If you switch to a thin man, you can say: "If it weren't for the light weight, this fall would break the bones." "I've become a meat pie!" The author personally experienced such an incident: the wife of a short scholar laughed at her husband for being too short. The scholar said with a smile: "I think it would be better to be shorter. If I am not 1.57 meters , can you make a masterpiece now? If it weren't for my short stature, would you have won every battle? If I hadn't been short, could you have said that I was too short?

It can be seen that it is easy to be funny when you laugh at yourself by fiercely attacking one of your own shortcomings. But with this magnanimity and courage, others will not let you laugh alone, but will usually laugh with you a few times.

After the victory of the Anti-Japanese War, Zhang Daqian returned to his hometown in Sichuan from Shanghai. Before leaving, his friends held a farewell banquet for him and specially invited Mei Lanfang and others to accompany him. At the beginning of the banquet, everyone asked Zhang Daqian to take the first seat. Zhang said: "Mr. Mei is a gentleman and should sit in the first seat. I am a villain and should accompany the last seat." Mei Lanfang and everyone else did not understand what he meant. Zhang Daqian explained: "Isn't there a saying, 'A gentleman speaks and a villain uses his hands'? Mr. Mei uses his mouth when he sings, and I use my hands when I paint. I should understand that Mr. Mei should sit first." All the guests in the hall laughed and said Ask them to take the first seat side by side. Zhang Daqian laughs at himself as a villain, as if he is self-deprecating, but "the drunkard's intention is not to drink", which not only shows Zhang Daqian's open-mindedness, but also creates a relaxed and harmonious conversation atmosphere.

A man was about to go abroad for further study. His wife said half-jokingly: "When you go to that colorful world, you might fall in love with other women!" He said with a smile: "Look at me. He has a handsome face and bow-legged legs. He is so handsome that people can’t even look at him when he is standing on the road.” His wife was amused by this sentence. Everyone is taboo about mentioning their flaws in appearance, but this husband is able to accept his own congenital shortcomings and does not care about exposing them. Such self-deprecation

"I like you" leads to "I understand you", which leads to "I believe you". So, the final goal you achieve is trust. When others trust you, you can influence them to push themselves to develop their potential. This is also the ultimate goal of everyone when communicating with others and being positive.

In fact, whether you are a big shot or a small shot, self-deprecation can make you more popular. Big people gain a good reputation because self-deprecation can alleviate jealousy, while small people can enjoy themselves in hardship, and even become comedians overnight.

3. People who don't laugh at themselves appear stingy

Open-mindedness is an important quality contained in humor.

Be optimistic about everything, and see hope even when you are in jail, instead of being sad and gloomy all day long. Your valuable thinking mode is "it's a big deal," rather than being preoccupied and overly serious; more Think about your own shortcomings and incompetence, often laugh at yourself, instead of being the best in the world, blindly trying to win.

Open-mindedness often means detachment, but it does not develop into nothingness, so it is still. A positive factor, an expression of beautiful humanity.

(Chinese Soft Humor) records such an incident: A film director went to live in rural Sichuan in the 1960s. When it rained at noon, he saw a small hut to avoid, so he rushed to break down the door. When I walked in, I met an old couple making out in bed, so I hurriedly left, feeling embarrassed and unsure whether to stay or go. Not expecting the old man to go out, he warmly invited him to go out. He smiled and explained, "Nothing will happen on a rainy day." The old lady also interjected, "It also saves you from being hungry."

(Selected Yaxiao ) has the following story: A man boasted to his guests about his wealth: "My family has everything." He stretched out two fingers and said: "All that is missing is the sun and the moon in the sky." He has not yet said anything. After that, the servant at home came out and said: "The kitchen has run out of firewood." The man stretched out his finger again and said: "There is a lack of sun, moon and firewood."

The above two humors The protagonists in the novel free themselves from embarrassing situations by making fun of their own embarrassments and predicaments, which shows their open-minded demeanor. Let’s think about it, what else can they do?

Standing outside yourself and appreciating your own trauma can produce a period of happiness. A man named Heywood Bloss had invested 40 years of his savings in the stock market and lost it all in the 1929 crisis. When he heard the news, his reaction was not to cry uncontrollably or yell, but just to say: "It goes as quickly as it comes." He lost it overnight and had to say "It goes as quickly as it came." "Quick", but is it really "quick"? No, we know it was his 40 years of savings. Obviously, he was stepping out of his own disaster to mock himself.

There is such a story in (Qi Yan Lu): Liu Zhuo and his nephew Liu Xuan were both very knowledgeable and were arrested for breaking the law. The county officials didn't know that they were academic scholars, so they all put shackles on them. Liu Zhuo said: "I sit in the shackles (home) all day long, but I can't go home." Liu Xuan said; "I also sit in the shackles (home) with my wife all day long, but I don't see my wife."

Compared to Blossom, their self-deprecation is more interesting and more skillful. The lonely and desolate life without his family and wife did not seem serious. Like Burroughs, they laughed at their own tragedy, in effect overcoming it.

Narrow-minded, careless and stubborn are often the enemies of open-mindedness and boldness. Therefore, they are often ridiculed and ridiculed in humor. See:

Donald came home after a day's holiday in the capital and always complained that the rent for the room he stayed in that night was six pounds too expensive. His friend said: "It's nothing. I believe you will enjoy your sightseeing there." Donald said: "Where! I haven't seen anything good at all! Do you think I will pay so much rent?" Instead of making full use of the room?”

Donald’s gains and losses are clear. This is quite similar to Chen Kesheng, a Chinese writer Gao Xiaosheng, who fainted in the city and was sent to a high-end hotel. When he checked out, the price was so high that he was surprised. He immediately went back to his room and made the most of the room by lying and jumping on Simmons and the couch. Both Chen Kesheng and Donald became the object of ridicule by the author, which shows the importance of open-mindedness.

Finally, it is important to point out that self-deprecation should be detached rather than harsh and humiliating.

Most scholars believe that laughing at one's own shortcomings and stupidity is the highest state of humor. However, the emotion that accompanies this ridicule is different. If we laugh bitterly at ourselves, feeling that we have made stupid mistakes and deserve to be punished, we will only feel humiliated. Because the underlying consciousness behind this attitude is the belief that we should be better than we actually are, and this attitude towards life is an obstacle to our transcendence. If we laugh at ourselves with enough love in our hearts, we can achieve a certain amiable detachment. Because we think we are stupid, but we do not care about the consequences.

4. It's safest to scold yourself

When you want to make a joke, tell a short story, or make up a witticism or an interesting conversation, the safest target is yourself. Who would be unhappy if you were the one laughing?

There is an unwritten law that says that people who can laugh at themselves have the right to make fun of others. Sir Winston Churchill often used the power of humor to reduce the stress of war. I once made a wise remark about a political colleague: "He is a humble man, and he has many things that make him humble."

People in politics must be mentally prepared to be criticized at any time. attack.

However, for ordinary people, in daily life, if the "he" in Churchill's wise saying is changed to "I", it will appear more powerful. Whenever you want to criticize, complain, or suggest something to build upon, the "I" perspective is ideal.

By establishing yourself as the target of humor, you can convey information and express opinions without attacking others. For example: "A conceited person has a low appetite and is more interested in himself than in me."

"I am not old, I have just reached the prime of my life. It's just that I have spent more and more money than others." It takes a lot of time to reach my prime."

"I am a friend you can rely on at all times - when I need you."

Self-deprecation is widely used and safe. Here are a few examples:

① In impromptu speeches, if the speaker can self-mockery and distort himself in a timely and appropriate manner, it is a sign of high intelligence and education. Speakers can get humor from this to "lubricate" the relationship between the speaker and the audience and increase the interest of the speech.

On February 9, 1930, Cai Yuanpei’s 70th birthday, people from all walks of life in Shanghai held a banquet for him at the International Hotel. When thanking him, he said humorously and freely: "Everyone who comes to wish me a birthday is nothing more than Asking me to do things a few more years. I have lived to be 70 years old, and I feel that I have done wrong for the past 69 years. If I want to live a few more years, I will just do a few more years of wrong things." When the guests heard this, they burst into laughter. , the whole banquet was full of laughter and laughter. Just imagine, if he had put on a serious look and said his thanks in a serious manner, he would not have created such a relaxed and pleasant atmosphere. However, when using the "lubricant" of self-deprecation, you must pay attention to the scene and situation. It is not appropriate to use this "liquid" that makes people laugh in serious situations or in sad atmospheres.

③ Frankly teasing yourself can relieve tension.

When movies or TV shows show blind dates, often when one of the parties is about to speak, the other party also happens to speak, making the two people extremely embarrassed and have to swallow back what they were about to say. After a pause, , the two spoke at the same time... This embarrassing situation happened repeatedly. From a third perspective, this is a comedy, but for the person involved, it is a quite bitter experience.

I have also witnessed this embarrassing scene. At that time, the man who seemed to be both gentle and honest, in order to break the deadlock, said half-jokingly: "We seem to even breathe in the same breath!" After hearing this, not only the heroine couldn't help but laugh, but also the adults who came with her. They also laughed. Afterwards, everyone seemed very relaxed and everything went smoothly.

It is natural to feel nervous when meeting someone for the first time. The problem is, if you think too much about your first meeting, the tension will build. In order to avoid this situation from happening, it is a feasible method to talk about the situations when you are nervous or even failed and laugh at yourself. For example, when someone says, "Look! When I'm nervous, it's like I'm suffering from alcoholism. My hands keep shaking. There's nothing I can do about it." After saying this, his hands stop shaking.

③Bold self-sarcasm can show self-confidence and maintain face.

Sometimes you are embarrassed due to your own reasons, such as appearance defects, your own shortcomings, mistakes in words and deeds, etc. Confident people can better maintain their self-esteem, while people with low self-esteem often fall into embarrassment. . Boldly and skillfully mocking yourself for the shortcomings that affect your own image can unexpectedly show your self-confidence, and you can quickly get out of trouble while showing your unrestrained social charm. If you are "not at a high altitude", you might as well say that you are small in size, strong in face, and concentrated in high technology; if you are ugly and you find a beautiful girl, you might as well say, "I am ugly but I am gentle"; even if you Just like Liu Jing, if you have a small hunchback on your back, you might as well say that you are a crooked person. No wonder the American Herb Trudeau listed self-mockery as the highest level of humor in his book "A Humorous Life". It is even more amazing if you can combine your own embarrassment into the topic and elicit educational and enlightening truths based on the specific communication situation and language environment. For example, a teacher with a Cantonese accent and poor Mandarin once took Chinese language classes. When I was talking about a certain problem and wanted to give examples, I said "I have four metaphors" instead of "I have four farts." For a moment, the classroom seemed to explode, and the students laughed uncontrollably. The teacher had an idea. , recited a limerick: "Four farts, making a big fool of yourself. Dear classmates, don't follow my example. Practice Mandarin well as soon as possible, and you will be young, free and beautiful." "The teacher's wit and humor won warm applause from the students.

④ Self-mockery can show open-mindedness and increase human touch.

Laughing at our own appearance, or laughing at the things we don’t do very beautifully, will make us more humane and give people a sense of affability. Once, Chen Yi went to a relative’s house to celebrate the Mid-Autumn Festival. . When he entered the house, he found a good book, so he concentrated on reading it, marking it with a brush while reading. The owner urged him several times to go to dinner. When he didn't go, he brought rice cakes and candies. While he was reading and eating, he actually put the glutinous rice cake into the inkstone, dipped it in ink and put it into his mouth. The relatives laughed heartily when they saw it. But he said: "It doesn't matter if you eat some ink. I just feel that I have too little ink in my stomach! People like Chen Yi. Isn't it related to his open-minded and humorous nature?

In short, in social interaction In situations, self-deprecation is a rare panacea. When other methods fail, you might as well make fun of yourself. At least it is safe to criticize yourself. Unless you criticize others, you will generally not dislike others. The golden rule of a wise man is: no matter what If you want to laugh at others, laugh at yourself first.

5. Don’t laugh at yourself

When your mistakes cause conflicting emotions, if you can laugh at yourself in a timely manner, It shouldn't be difficult to get forgiveness. It's like two people fighting. One of them suddenly falls to the ground and thinks he is no match. If the other person is not a rogue, the hostility will usually disappear in a good-natured and funny way, and maybe he will help himself to defeat. The following is a specific example of this method:

① If the hostility in the conversation comes from a minor gaffe, it can be tactfully explained by just laughing at yourself. For example, if you say unpleasant and dirty words during the conversation If you say obscene words, the other person's face will darken. You can laugh at yourself and say: "Hey, I'm such a crude person. I can't get rid of the dirty words in my belly. I have to forgive you a lot. "An interjection can make the other party no longer mind. Or if you are a little excited during an argument, your words are blunt, your voice is loud, and the other party is already unhappy. You should quickly stop the conversation: "I'm sorry, I am easily excited. I was really excited just now. Became a fighting cock. "The other party will definitely laugh.

③ If the conversation hurts the other person's self-esteem and exposes the other person's hidden scars, it is dangerous. If the other person is well-educated, he will keep silent and leave; if the other person is poorly-educated, See if he doesn't attack you personally! At this time, you must think of a way to laugh at yourself, but you should try to be more humorous and sincere to make the other person feel happy. For example, you talk about healthy people in front of a disabled person. Advantages, and mentioning the jobs that he cannot do, he will definitely be very dissatisfied. You can say: "Well, having said that, healthy people may not be strong. Zhang Haidi was paralyzed, but he was able to learn a skill and became famous all over the world. I am a person with well-developed limbs and a simple mind. I speak without thinking about the past and the future. My mother often calls me an old man..."

③After the wrong words are spoken, wittily lead the topic to the next. Self. Eliminate the other person's hostility and shift the other person's focus of attention through friendly attacks. The advantage of this is that it can take care of the other person's self-esteem without any trace, and at the same time subtly ease the tense atmosphere.

The new students arrived in a certain dormitory and were vying for seats. Lao Qi was outspoken and argued with Lao Ba for a long time. When Lao Ba, who was a few days younger than him, finally took the last seat, he said, "Okay. You're at the bottom. You are the baby of our dormitory, and your surname is Wang, so I will call you ‘King of Poodle’ from now on. "The speaker is unintentional, but the listener is intentional. It turns out that the old man has pimples all over his face, commonly known as "Youth Beauty Syndrome". He often feels very deeply about it. How can he not be annoyed at this time? When Lao Qi saw that it had caused another disturbance, he felt very regretful. On the surface, he was neither anxious nor annoyed. He looked into the mirror and said to himself: "'Curling up with your cheeks parted, leaning between your ears, all the charm lies in a little bit.' Alas, Lao Ba, I am really like 'one wave is not over, but another wave is rising'! "When Lao Ba heard this, he couldn't help laughing. It turned out that Lao Qi also had freckles on his face.

Lao Qi's self-correction skills are very good. After inadvertently offending others, he immediately responded implicitly. He made some self-mockery, and cleverly used Yu Guangzhong's poem to point out that he also has freckles. His words "one wave is not over, but another wave is coming up", which is not only a self-deprecation of the distribution of freckles on his face, but also a comment on himself. The implicit self-blame that caused trouble twice without restraint won the old man's understanding smile. This kind of self-mockery was used to tease the other person's forgiveness, so it was also a very flexible method of correcting mistakes.

④Use self-deprecation to resolve distance and hostility in the new environment.

Bailey was responsible for paperwork in the transportation department of a large company. Bailey was up and down in the wave of personnel changes. The new colleagues seemed not to be friendly to him, until one day Bailey used self-deprecation, "They didn't dare to fire me.

” He explained, “I am far behind others in everything. ”

Bailey’s ability to make fun of himself made his new co-workers laugh with him and helped him build friendly and cooperative working relationships. If Bailey’s quip is indeed a sign of his future, This also reminds him of his bad habit of procrastinating until tomorrow. He uses self-irony to objectively review his own problems and improve his performance, so he succeeds.

< p>6. Saying that you can make others blush

Humorous characters are usually kind to others and embody the intention of the humor user or the author. Generally speaking, he will always shy away from things that are difficult for others to deal with. Even if he is treated unfairly or is wronged that is unbearable to ordinary people, he will often not gnash his teeth in resentment, curse in anger, or even take out a weapon. The killer kills the opponent. However, he is not a coward. He will respond in his own tolerant way, maybe with a little ridicule, and certainly less self-deprecating. In this way, he often becomes a higher level. The winner.

Legend has it that the wife of the Greek philosopher Socrates was a shrew and often lost her temper with him. Socrates always laughed at himself and said to others: "There are many benefits to marrying such a wife. Exercise my endurance and deepen my cultivation. "Once, his wife lost her temper again and made a fuss. She refused to give up for a long time, so Socrates had to retreat. As soon as he walked out of the house, the angry wife suddenly poured a large basin of water from upstairs. At this time, Socrates shuddered and said calmly: "I knew a long time ago that there would be heavy rain after the thunder, and it was just as I expected. ”

Obviously, Socrates was helpless, but his self-deprecating sarcasm helped him escape from this dilemma, showing Socrates’ profound life cultivation.

You can make the other person blush by "innuendo", which not only relieves the discomfort, but also serves as a warning.

Comedian Carlo Boni was sitting in a restaurant once. At this time, an old woman walked to her table, raised her hand and touched Carlo's face, and said apologetically: "I can't see." Not very pretty. ”

“Save your blessings! Carlo said. "I don't look very good." ”

It is absolutely rude to imitate someone’s face when you don’t know them; when she pretended to be sorry but was actually jealous, the old woman’s jealousy of the beautiful young woman almost developed into It's a vicious vitriol. It's conceivable that if she faced someone as outrageous and narrow-minded as she was, people might witness a fight. However, Carlo Boni performed. Comedy, she deeply understood the difference between comedy and farce, so she looked calm, first described the old woman's offensive derogation as a "blessing", and then asked her to stop "blessing", and then admitted it frankly. Not very good-looking, mocking the other person and laughing at himself. He maintained his dignity in the face of rude and arrogant aggression, and at the same time showed a kind and generous spirit, thus defeating the other party mentally. There are many elements that make people laugh, but there are even more elements that make people admire.