Mother's view on spouse selection: how to choose a good father for the baby

Everyone says that marriage is a woman's second reincarnation.

When I was a girl, I silently drew him countless times in my mind, either tall, chic, humorous or calm, wearing a white shirt with a sunny breath and a brand-new young black hair, standing in front of you like that, with the corners of my mouth rising. You look into his eyes, his eyes are rippling, and peach blossoms are blossoming.

Marriage is definitely a watershed for girls. When a girl turns into a woman and enters the marriage hall, it means leaving the familiar family and forming a new family with her lover, from a charming girl without fingers to a mother who manages housework and raises children.

When I became the mother of two babies, in retrospect, I had a new understanding of finding the other half. When girls are in love with spring, they always fantasize that they can marry a prince, and the concept of the other half is abstract and idealistic. When I became a mother, I found that the happiest thing was to marry a "golden partner" who adopted a baby.

Young girls with foresight, keep your eyes open. The lover of today is the father of tomorrow. The happiness of the child is firmly in our hands, so we must choose a good father for the baby.

1. Kindness: caring, more popular with babies.

Choosing a kind man to get married is the first essence of a happy life.

I remember when I was a graduate student, my tutor told me that the first criterion for marrying someone must be kindness.

There are countless dog blood plots in life: "the person I love the most hurts me the most." A lover is the closest person who is not related by blood. A kind-hearted person can't do something that hurts you extremely at the absolute moment of life. This is the tenderest love.

A kind-hearted man is more caring and more popular with children. Everyone has their own unique magnetic field. A kind person's magnetic field is as warm as jade, and a child is smart. He is best at observing words and feelings and will judge friendliness and goodwill more accurately. This is the instinct of survival.

Peach likes Uncle C best. When they saw him, they smiled as brightly as sunflowers. At first, I just thought it was strange. Dad Tao was once very jealous. Later, I found out that C is a very kind and patient person, who acts like a child when playing with children. He squatted on the ground with a peach and looked at the world from the same perspective. Peach accidentally fell, and he caught her with his body.

If a man has many children, he is definitely a kind person. Imagine getting along so well with other people's children Having a child of his own, this kind man must be a father holding a child!

2. Have a sense of boundary and responsibility: distinguish everyone's small family.

Someone once summed up the four major misfortunes of women in China: motherhood, nanny, widowed parenting and widowed marriage! An all-round interpretation of women's living dilemma in China. Many mothers said they were shot.

Why are women in China unhappy? Because they married Ma Baonan. "My mother said ..." Speaking of it, my mother is right in everything she does. I need her care and participation all my life, which is a typical feature of Ma Baonan.

No sense of boundaries is the root of all Ma Bao behaviors.

Friend D has been in a tense and depressed relationship with his beloved wife recently. We have all met D's wife, beautiful and straightforward. At the beginning, D took pains to pursue her, and she was elated for a long time after winning the beauty.

Since the birth of her daughter, D's mother has come to help with the children, and the family has started the days when chickens fly and dogs jump and chicken feathers are everywhere. My beloved wife said that children should lie down and climb more, and grandma and granddaughter are not enough, that is, they hold them every day; My beloved wife said not to chase after food, let the children grab it. Grandma always thinks that the children don't have enough to eat, and one more bite is just one bite ... D mother photographed every detail, and even the young couple had to express their views on how to put underwear in the closet.

Tiny details of life pile up and life becomes a gorgeous robe full of lice. The lining is riddled with holes, but nothing can be decided at home. D's beloved wife finally collapsed and was furious with her mother-in-law.

Mother d thinks she worked so hard to get into this field. In a rage, she took her children back to her hometown.

The beloved wife was more excited when she didn't see the children, and put the divorce on the agenda. D still loves his wife very much, but he said, "What can I do? She is my mother! " "

In fact, the situation does not have to develop to such a tragic situation of "separation of wives and children". All this is because the man sandwiched between two women has no sense of boundaries and is not responsible enough.

At the beginning of the conflict, if D can stand up, show his position, clarify the boundaries of small families, and let mother know that she can help and enjoy family happiness, but some boundaries cannot be broken, and many things should be subject to the opinions of the D couple. When her own son comes forward, even if she is sad and lost, she will not take it to heart. Two women who are completely unrelated and live under the same roof will not have "infighting" because they love the same man.

Cherish life and stay away from mambo.

Marry a man who has a sense of boundaries, knows how to protect a small family and loves his wife and children.

3. Have the ability to make money: Raising a baby is manual labor that costs money.

According to a social survey, the most popular husband candidate in the marriage and love market has changed from a civil servant to an IT elite.

The so-called IT elite, in popular terms, is the "code farmer". Why? Because of making more money and simple feelings. There is a joke that women give priority to science and engineering boys, especially computer graduates. The reasons are as follows: high salary, frequent overtime, no time to spend money, most of the colleagues around are men, and the probability of derailment is low. It's amazing to see a normal and gentle woman, and she treats her like a treasure and takes good care of her. You are busy making money, I can be busy giving you flowers!

Look up at the society, children should not spend too much money! Not to mention food, clothing, housing and medical care, but education. Private kindergartens often pay tens of thousands of dollars a month, while public kindergartens start with tens of thousands of dollars in sponsorship fees; After entering primary school, you can try not to enroll in various remedial classes and training courses with various names and high fees. If you believe in your IQ, you can try not to enroll in remedial classes.

I know a sister who is free and easy by nature and has a high IQ. My husband Tsinghua graduated, and his IQ is above the standard. She really didn't enroll her children in remedial classes. As a result, in the second grade, the child really got the class countdown. Isn't the child clever? No, or is the child not working hard? Not exactly. It's that children really haven't learned and won't.

Shake a tree to make you laugh. We can't change the existing environment, we can only learn to adapt.

I don't want to tell you, dad/mom, I want to sign up for a remedial class when my children like dancing, piano and even Olympics and English. However, we have to calculate silently in our hearts whether this month's expenses, except food and clothing, are enough to pay tuition? Because of money, refuse his request, how to face the eyes of children eager for new knowledge and hobbies.

A while ago, "Can a monthly salary of 30,000 yuan support a summer vacation?" I, a working-class woman with a baby, haven't considered traveling abroad with my baby every holiday, and I already think of Alexander.

Not a woman's material, but the reality of life.

We can earn our own money, but the baby belongs to two people, and a husband can earn it and share it. Why not?

4. Peace of mind and practicality: Dad loves mom is the best education for children.

The essence of mate selection is to find someone who loves you, give birth to the crystallization of love and live together.

Love is the preservative of marriage, and the best love education for children is that fathers love their mothers.

First of all, with this man, I will be very secure and practical, and I will have a strong vitality in my heart, which will make people more positive and develop in a good direction.

Recalling the time when I was looking for a job after graduation, Mr. Wang accompanied me through the most shaky days. Every day, I look for all kinds of recruitment information on the Internet, revise and submit my resume, find my favorite unit at crowded job fairs, and attend written tests and interviews as usual ... Every day, I am very tired. Every day, someone will accompany me to have a meal or a dessert or a glass of red wine. In an instant, I will feel that the whole day's commotion has passed, and tomorrow is another day. God will really change a new sun to protect the world.

On the day when I finally found my favorite job, I looked at the simple fish tank on the windowsill, and the peacock fish, which was usually ugly and ugly, swam so gracefully. They quietly and silently shuttle between the roots of the green radish. My heart is also quiet, and I have never felt at ease. The feeling of dust settling.

I know in my heart that it was Mr. Wang who was by my side, saying nothing and asking nothing, but giving me courage and certainty invisibly.

With him, you are very at ease and practical. In the future, children can also feel this peace of mind and practicality.

A good husband and father are like the golden sunshine in spring, while his wife and children are like green vines on the balcony, spreading their branches and leaves towards the sunshine and flourishing day by day.

Mr. Perfect doesn't exist. Everyone has his own teapot lid.

Choosing a spouse is like eating, carrots and vegetables have their own tastes.

For the mother of the child, the child can wake up in the middle of the night and give a hand; At the critical moment of career, you can give some time and space; On the big dining table of the husband's family, there can be a stool holding your hand silently; In the days at the end of the month, pink soft sister coins will be solemnly handed in; On the night of emotional breakdown, I have a shoulder to lean on ... think about it, I already feel very happy.

Mr. Perfect doesn't exist. Women have women's difficulties, and men have men's sufferings. If two people are together, they can live a life of honey mixed with oil and let their children soak in honeypots. That is to find love and finally find their own teapot with a lid.

May all women in the world be good. May all children in the world enjoy the love of their parents.