Five selected humorous jokes and stories

# Ability training # Introducing jokes is an important category of folk culture. Jokes make people laugh, sigh and think. Here are five humorous joke stories to share. Welcome to read the reference!

1. Selected humorous jokes

In ancient times, there was a crocodile seller. Once he saw someone sneezing. He was surprised and asked the man. The man replied, "You don't know, this is because my wife misses me at home, every time she goes out."

The seller in Krooks was very unhappy after hearing this: My wife and I have a good relationship, but why doesn't she miss me every time I go out? The more I think about it, the more angry I get.

When he got home, he angrily scolded his wife: "I was away from home and worked hard." Why didn't you miss me? " The wife said, "I miss you every day!" " "He said," liar! You missed me. Why didn't I sneeze? Hearing this, his wife smiled and said, "Well, I will miss you more when I go out next time." "

The next time he went out, his wife secretly put some Chili powder on his right sleeve. On this day, the weather is very cold. When he was trying to cross the bridge, his nose fell off. He wiped his nose with his sleeve. I didn't expect to smell the spicy taste. He sneezed a few times, shook a crock with a pole in his hand and fell into the river, almost falling. He was so angry that he cursed again: "If you don't read, you won't read. Once you read it, you won't stop. You don't watch it early or late, just watch it when I cross the bridge! "

2. A selection of humorous jokes

Once upon a time, there was a rich businessman who wanted his son to follow in his father's footsteps and become a richer man than himself. To this end, he tried his best to invite a teacher.

He called his son to the teacher and said, "This teacher is virtuous and knowledgeable. Learn from the teacher in the future and be meticulous. "

The son obediently said, "Don't worry! Father, I must follow your instructions and follow the teacher in every word and deed. "

One day, my son had dinner with his teacher. He sat respectfully, the teacher picked up chopsticks, and he picked up chopsticks; The teacher has a mouth to eat, and he has a mouth to eat; He takes whatever the teacher takes. He imitates the teacher's every move. He is meticulous and accurate.

The teacher felt strange and looked up at him. He also looked up at the teacher at once. Seeing his strange appearance, the teacher couldn't help laughing. This smile doesn't matter. The food choked my throat, I coughed and sneezed, and I spilled food all over the table. My son sneezed when he saw the teacher, but he always failed after several attempts, so he quickly stood up, bowed deeply to the teacher and said with shame, "Teacher, your skills are really difficult, and students really can't learn!"

3. Selected humorous jokes

In ancient times, there was a rich man who was so stingy that he couldn't even afford to hire servants. His only son, on the other hand, is profligate and bohemian, and often preaches a set of lofty remarks, saying that "the rich man does not lose, and his son does not lose." If this is passed down from generation to generation, isn't it too rich to put money? " Money is a circulating thing, and no one can take it for himself. If a person only knows how to accumulate and lock money in a box, it can be said to be frugal for himself, but it is a crime for society. So, I spend money like water. Although my father objected, I knew I was making a contribution to society. "After listening to his son's punch line, the old rich man also began to understand. One day, he called all the debtors home and said:

"I received a lesson from my son, as if I had just woken up from a dream, and all the debts you borrowed from me before can be paid back. Because after paying it back, he still squandered it alone. " Then he took out all the bonds and set them on fire. The debtor immediately said in unison, "Thanks to Mr. Great kindness, I can't repay it in this life, so I have to wait until I become an ox and a horse in my next life to repay your old man." One of the people who owed the most, kneeling in front of the miser, said gratefully, "They owe less, and they can turn into cattle and horses to pay back." I owe so much that I have to be your father in my next life. "

The old rich man was furious and said, "How dare you! You are so rude! " "no! Don't! Don't be angry, sir, "said the debtor. "If I become an animal, I will never be able to repay your kindness for decades. Only by being your father can I make you squander your hard-earned money as much as possible! "

4. Selected humorous jokes

Once upon a time, there was a couple. The husband is stupid, but the wife is smart.

One day, the wife asked her silly husband to catch some chickens and send them to her father-in-law's house. Silly husband agreed and left home with a wooden cage. There happened to be a man on the road. He stepped forward and said:

"What are you going to do?" The man replied, "I'm going to my father-in-law's house." The stupid husband quickly said, "Just right, my wife asked me to take the chicken to my father-in-law's house, and I'll let you take it." The man was so clever that he took the cage and left.

When the stupid husband came home, his wife asked him, "Why did you come back so soon?" ? Has the chicken arrived? "The husband replied," I happened to meet a man on the road who also went to my father-in-law's house, so I asked him to go with me. "The wife said angrily," you idiot! His father-in-law, not yours Get it back quickly! "

The husband obediently chased out, chased after, and saw a man coming in front with the same chicken coop in his hand. He grabbed the man's chicken coop and said, "Give me back the chicken I asked you to take. I have my own grandfather. " Confused, monk Zhang Er said, "This is not your chicken. I have a duckling in this cage! " "The silly husband looked even angrier and said," Hum! You didn't dare to tell me, and you deliberately squashed the chicken's mouth. Really nothing! "

5. Selected humorous jokes

Once, a county magistrate sent a dull servant to escort a guilty monk to the state capital. The servant was afraid that he would forget something, so he made up two jingles: "Wrap the umbrella cangue and teach me the document."

On the way, the officers recited these two sentences as they walked. In the evening, I stayed in an inn. The monk knew that the servant was a fool, so he got drunk while eating, shaved his hair, put a cangue around his neck, and then ran away quietly.

The next day, the police officer woke up and said to himself, "Oh, no, I drank too much last night. Let me see if I have lost anything, parcels and umbrellas. " Then he touched the cangue around his neck and said, "There are cangue and documents."

The police officer thought for a moment and suddenly shouted in surprise, "Oh, dear! The monk is gone! "

After a while, he touched his bald head, turned grief into joy and said, "All right! The monk is still there! "

After thinking for a while, he shouted again: "It's broken!" Where have I been? "