Looking for classic funny short jokes

◆An old farmer went up to the second floor at the request of the double-decker bus attendant, but immediately came down again and said: You lied to me, there is no driver on the bus.

◆The chemist proposed marriage: "I am the oxygen atom O, and you are the hydrogen atom H. Our combination is as stable as water (H2O)." His girlfriend wrote back: "Where is the other H?"

◆A woman asked the farm owner: "Why is mad cow disease prevalent now?" The farm owner said: "If you were caught milking four times a day and only had sex once a year, would you go crazy?"

◆Female Rat A held a photo of a bat: “This is my boyfriend. "Mother B: "Too ugly! "Female Rat A: "But it's a pilot? ”

◆One day, you went to buy condoms, and the boss asked, “How big should I buy?” "You thought for a while and opened your mouth, "Such a big one"

◆The mother who was about to give birth asked her son: Do you want a brother or a sister? The son scratched his head and thought for a long time: If not If it's too much trouble, I want a pony.

◆Xiaojun asked Xiaozhu: "Is the English word for pig pug?" "Xiao Zhu said: "pig" "Is it U or I? "I!" "U!" ""It's I..."

◆The shark looked at a windsurfer and said: "The reception is really thoughtful. There is breakfast, plates and napkins.

★One day Dad I bought a cake for my son. Dad: Don’t eat it. Please use the word “delicious” to make a sentence! Son: It tastes so good!

★The village woman ran to the police and said: Come on, comrade. There is a public restroom, where is the mother's restroom?

★The father saw his daughter and son-in-law kissing at the end of the village. The son-in-law blushed and asked, "You want one too?" The father was startled and quickly replied: "No, I have it at home." ”

★The couple was visiting the park and walked in front of the giraffes. The wife suddenly had red cheeks and tears in her eyes. The husband was puzzled: How could it be like this? Wife: I remembered the way you looked when you took Viagra. Husband, you are really It's great!

★One day, 0 and 8 met on the street. 0 looked at 8 indifferently and said coldly: "If you are fat, you are fat, why should you wear a belt!" snort! ”

★A leader spoke: I am a big boss, and you, the women’s director, know best how thick I am. I talked to her all night long last night. At first she didn’t know my strengths and weaknesses, but I didn’t know hers. The depth of...

★The warden asked, and the prisoner said that there was a bright moonlight in front of his bed. He was so panicked because he had no money. He looked up at the bank and lowered his head when he entered the cell. The warden: He was born decades ago and he didn’t have anything in his pocket. money, robbed a small bank, and was imprisoned for several years

★Judge: “You are about to be shot, what is your last wish? Prisoner: "I wish to wear a bulletproof vest." ”

★ Chief: Hello, comrades! Soldier: Hello, chief! Chief: Good job, comrades! Soldier: Serve the people! The chief quietly said to the person next to him that we have many soldiers. Soldier: Chief Bull nose!

★A beautiful woman went to buy a bed: Is this bed strong? The boss replied with a smile: Of course! It was tried by elephants and hippopotamuses before leaving the factory - but in your case, It's better to be more careful!

★Husband: You want to show off your beauty by going out with it? Wife: You are so confused, so I might as well take it with you. It’s better for you to go out!

★At the train station, the three-year-old son wanted to pee. His father said: Pee on the railway. The child thought for a while and said: What should I do if the train slips?

★The little sheep said to the old sheep: Look how useless you are. You want meat but not meat. The old sheep said to the little sheep: "You are useful, but you have a lot of meat. When the wolf comes, he will look for you first!" ”

★A man slipped while repairing the roof. When he fell and passed the kitchen window, he shouted to his wife: Let’s make lunch for one less person today!

★A: Hello! What shark fin wontons? There are no shark fins in it! Wonton stall owner: Sorry, my name is Zhao Shark Fin.