Joke Collection Website - Cold jokes - Come on, pear.

Come on, pear.

1. The hunter hunted and saw two birds in the tree. He shot down one with a gun and found it hairless. Just wondering, another bird flew down and cursed the hunter: Damn, I just coaxed her to take off her clothes, and you shot her down. . . 2. The farmer wanted to kill the rooster but couldn't catch it, so he grabbed the hen and said to the rooster, Don't come down, let you be a bachelor! Rooster: You fucking think I'm stupid. If I fall, she will become a widow. . . There is a parrot hanging in front of the hotel. When the guest arrived, he said, hello, welcome! A regular customer thought, I'll go in quickly and see how you react. One day he ran in and the parrot said, fuck you! You scared me! ! ! In a military exercise, a shell deviated far away. The soldiers sent to inspect found that the shells landed in the farmland, and Tian Zhongzheng stood with you. Your clothes are torn, and your face is dark and full of tears. You said: Is it worthwhile to steal a cabbage and fry it? 5. The restaurant fly said to the toilet fly: You chase the fishy smell all day, and I eat spicy food all day. Come here! Toilet flies: no common goal, no common goal. What's the use of eating well? How many beautiful women have you met? 6. The Beijing-Kowloon Railway is open to traffic, and farmers along it can see it. A female passenger on the bus threw her sanitary napkin out of the window and stuck it on a farmer's face. The farmer took it and said, * * *! This car is so fast that a piece of paper can make your nose bleed! ! ! 7. Have you ever heard of it? I looked back 500 times in my last life to get a brush in my life, and I looked back 1000 times in my life to get a smile at each other. Friends like us didn't do anything else in their last lives, but turned around. . . 8. A woman urinated in the toilet, and a drunk went by mistake after drinking. He heard the sound of urinating and said, don't pour it, I really don't drink it! The woman was so frightened that she didn't dare to pee, so she couldn't hold back and farted. The drunkard said, * * * *, why did you open another bottle! 9. Get up early in the morning, the rooster beat the hen and asked the hen: Why did the rooster beat you? The hen said she didn't know, so she asked the rooster. The rooster said, damn it, I got up this morning and laid a duck egg! ! ! 10.20 years ago, my mother held you waiting for the bus. Everyone laughed at the ugly child, and mother cried. An old man selling bananas patted her and said, don't cry, big sister! Give your monkey bananas! Poor thing. I'm starving. . . 1 1. The farmer drove the donkey into the city and met a rogue. Rogue: Did you eat? The farmer said, yes. Rogue: I asked the donkey. Hearing this, the farmer turned and slapped the donkey twice: Shit, there are relatives in the city who don't say a word. 12. The pig asked God to be reincarnated. The emperor asked: farming? The answer is too bitter. Say: work? Too tired to answer. Hey: Playing with monkeys? The answer is too difficult. What did the emperor ask for? A: You can eat, drink and fuck! The emperor was frightened: this son of a bitch still wants to be a national cadre! 13. A child in the delivery room smiled after birth. The midwife was very surprised. When she gathered around to observe, she found that the child's fist was clenched. After breaking it, she found that it was an abortion pill. She only heard the child say, damn it! Do you want to kill me? It's not that easy! ! ! 14. Ducks and crabs race and reach the finish line at the same time. It's hard to say who is the winner. The referee said, come and cut the cloth with stones! Duck is furious: Shit! Black whistle! Set me up. It was cloth when it came out. He always cuts it when he comes out.