Joke notes

Some people say that "being born sorry" is the best interpretation of "human disqualification". Being disqualified on earth means being disqualified. In recent years, more and more people laugh at themselves as "mourning", and more and more novels are written for lonely and simple souls. Some people will be "poisoned" after reading it, while others will be intoxicated after reading it. If all you read from this book is gloom and anxiety, it is actually the biggest misunderstanding of this book.

This book consists of five parts. The descriptions of the three photos in the preface, the first note, the second note, the third note and the postscript, are the author's notes translated literally by the translator and have not been polished.

As a novel, it seems too straightforward; As an autobiography, it is too sad and gloomy; This is a written record suitable for reading as a note, but it is good because it is too real.

This book has been selling well for decades since it was published. Undoubtedly, as long as people are still questioning life, as long as people are still struggling in life and as long as there is confusion and anxiety in their souls, it will continue to sell well. Because no book has ever been so real, facing the fragility and darkness of the soul.

Shame, loneliness and despair, coupled with his cowardice, weak yearning for happiness and eternal pursuit of spiritual purity, Ye Zang gradually lost a little trust in the world in the uneasiness of his soul, and was gradually pushed to the nothingness without love, warmth and everything disappearing.

This is not a soul's self-indulgence and sinking, but a life's blood and tears accusation.

Ye Zang was born in a big family with many brothers and sisters. His father is the absolute authority in the family, and his mother is sickly. Parents' love and brotherhood are unrealistic things to him, just like a cake is only that big, and everyone can only get so much.

Besides, Ye Zang is not a likable child. He is sensitive and suspicious, full of disdain and confusion about everything around him. It is said that people will starve to death if they don't eat. He doesn't understand the habits of human society, but no one gives him guidance and listening. The sight of a large family of more than a dozen people eating together without expression and saying a word made him tremble all over.

There is no shortage of money and people in this family, but there is no love and care.

It was because he wanted to talk that he finally decided not to talk to anyone, whether parents, brothers and sisters, or even everyone he could think of, and closed the door to trust him. However, when he was desperate and helpless, there was no one around him. No one would listen to his cry for help, and he finally gave up his plan to ask the world for help and fell into a helpless situation.

As a child, he is not even qualified to ask his parents for his favorite toys. I'm afraid that choosing a toy that doesn't suit my father's mind will annoy my father. Ye Zang was so scared that even choosing toys became an arduous task to please his father. In that family, he has no right to be himself. When he came out, he was not really seen, let alone understood.

Ye Zang is afraid of choice, not because he has no ability to choose, nor because he has nothing to make himself happy. It's just that that ability and happiness have long been deprived, replaced by tyranny, arrogance and indifference.

He is just an unsuspecting, passive Nuo Nuo master Nuo Nuo, who can only silently endure the invasion of male and female servants. Xiao Ye has tasted the meanness, ugliness and cruelty of human nature and knows his helplessness. So he was confused from the beginning, and finally completely lost his trust in people.

Ye Cang in childhood and middle school has been trying to attract everyone's attention. He made everyone around him laugh with his humorous jokes and exaggerated performances. Even if he knows that things are boring, he will yawn and obey other people's small demands. Beneath his lonely and ignorant appearance, he is really a kind and gentle man.

Ye Cang, who never refuses people, never wants to bring trouble to others, and brings happiness to others by extreme methods, has already seen through the hypocrisy and mutual deception between people, and he tries to adapt to social rules in his own way. Unfortunately, people only saw his performance and heard his hilarious words, but failed to understand his loneliness, and no one became his real friend.

So after a middle school classmate, Yi Zhu, exposed his tricks, he emerged with great anxiety, which was the panic that he infiltrated from his bones. No one has seen the real Ye Zang. One day the man saw that Ye Zang once wanted to be friends with that man.

Dance strange Indian dances for my family, collect jokes and tell them to everyone, and become the school's favorite "naughty bag" by teasing. All he wants is attention. What he is expressing is nothing more than the stubbornness and helplessness of forcibly integrating himself into this world. This is indeed Ye Zang's greatest effort and his last courtship to mankind. Sadly, he was abandoned by the crowd before he gave up.

Ye Cang, a middle school student, is already very handsome, and many girls are infatuated with him. Ye Zang clearly knows his attraction, and his temperament makes many women fall for it. He was not proud of it, but looked at it coldly and calmly.

He treats every woman he gets along with with with the utmost sincerity and respect. He doesn't embarrass or lie to each other. Even if the relationship between two people is really time to leave, tell the truth and don't drag your feet.

It's good to "run out of money" with the eldest son of a bar girl, not to drag down the life of Amethyst's mother and daughter, and not to grow old overnight after his wife's good son is defiled. Ye Zang treats every relationship with absolute childlike innocence, appreciates and shares the same interests, and knows that even simple transactions never deceive anyone or any feelings. Every woman he meets thinks he is a good man.

It is worth mentioning that there are two people among the flowers who moved him the most. One is the eldest son, who died of double suicide. Her death made her the Bai Yueguang in Ye Zang's heart. The other is Ye Zang's unlicensed wife Yoshiko, who loves her purity. She is the red rose in Ye Zang's mind.

He once found a moment of peace in being loved, but those sad and lonely emotions suddenly came at him like a scourge. In a relationship, no one can resist their inner anxiety.

Wandering among the flowers, what he has been looking for is the habitat of the soul, and he is willing to pay for it all his life. He lingers on the pillows of different women, but he is still lonely. They love him, but they can't understand him, let alone help him. He has lost the ability to love a person, step by step towards the irreparable shadow of death.

Ye Cang's life has experienced every woman who loves him. Their surging love has given Ye Zang a stable life, and also pushed him to the vortex of exhausted existence.

Ye Cang's life is called a friend, just a righteous man. He is six years older than Ye Cang. He was born in a civilian family. They met in high school because of painting, and they also embarked on the road of "friends and friends" and teamed up to eat, drink and have fun.

Horimu witnessed Ye Cang's journey from rich young master to penniless, from youth to overnight hoary head, from artist to madman. There is no real friendship between two people, and they also know their image and status in each other's hearts. Obviously they hate each other, but they drink together again and again, go out to kill time together, hurt each other, and are inseparable.

Horimu was the first person to bring freshness to the timid Ye Cang. He took Ye Zang out of his little corner and walked into this world, dragging Ye Zang to sink together. The difference is that Horimu is social and realistic. He separates life from spirit. He is struggling in real life, and there is always tired and secular hope.

Even after Horimu disliked Ye Zang's loss of power and looked down on his The Walking Dead and his cartoons, Ye Zang was still willing to believe him after giving him an expulsion order. Ye Zang knows that Horimu has never suffered a loss since they got along. He knew that Horimu was calculating, insincere to him, or responsive to Horimu, and was finally sent to a mental hospital under someone he trusted.

Hori wood only uses leaves to hide it, without any warmth. Ye Zang exhausted all his innocence in that "friendship".

In friendship, Ye Zang didn't care, but he didn't meet anyone worthy. Throughout his life, he has no sincere friends. His friendship with Horimu was just a funny joke.

In this book, Osamu Dazai wrote the abyss-like loneliness and despair of Ye Zang, his inescapable pessimism and decadence, his eternal longing for love and being loved, and the truthfulness and frankness of the story, which made the story very penetrating.

In Disqualification on Earth, Ye Zang didn't find an outlet for life, and stayed in a shabby house with an old maid in her 60s, waiting for the day when everything disappeared. In the author Osamu Dazai's life, he also failed to give himself a retreat. After finishing this masterpiece, he ended his tired and groggy life.

In the final analysis, this book describes not a person who is rejecting life and society, but a "marginal person" who is confused about human society but rejected by society.

Ye Cang is too lonely. In addition to the inherent sadness, there is also a person who stumbled in the process of exploring the world alone and was hurt again and again by people's indifference and falsehood. He is tired and lonely because he has never been himself. In catering to this unfriendly world, he finally fell into the abyss.

Disqualification on earth is the self-revolution of human nature. It is a pure rebellious soul's resistance to the secular world to take off the mask of the hypocrisy of the secular world and paint the darkness at will in the face of the erosion of human nature.

However, this book gives every reader an exit. No matter how unhappy life is, there are always people in this world who feel the same way with you. Even he has suffered unbearable pain in life and experienced ups and downs that are difficult to calm down in life.

Every soul is lonely, and it is precisely because burnout and sadness will come quietly that people have to face the sun all the time to have hope.

* About the author: A cloud in the sky, a woman who combines love and loneliness, talks to herself between dream and reality.