Funny words to friends

Funny words to friends:

1) There is such a person who will call you back immediately if you text him. Day or night. There is such a person, if you ask him, he will listen to you, you don't want to talk to him, and he won't bother you with text messages anymore. He is 186.

2) men in the new century: they can sleep on the floor, live in the corridor, kneel on the main board, mend clothes, eat leftovers, pay for prescriptions, bring up children, support girls, endure loneliness and strive to be a big wolf?

3) women in the new century: get into the hall, get out of the kitchen, write the code, find out the abnormality, kill the Trojan horse, climb over the fence, drive a good car, afford a new house, beat mistresses and beat hooligans?

4) It's almost the end of the term. Let's sing with me. My family lives on the high loess slope, and the wind blows over the slope. Whether it's Chris Lee or Yico Zeng, it's my brother. My brother? My family lives on the high loess slope, and the sun passes by the slope. Whether I worship Brother Chun or Brother Zeng, please bless me to pass the exam and not fail! ?

5) review = fail, not review = fail, so review+not review = fail+fail, raise the common factor, (1+ not) review = (not +1) fail, so review = fail. Shit, the truth was born?

6) The motherland has not been reunified, so I am not in the mood to review?

7) Time is the best teacher, but unfortunately? Finally, he killed all the students?

8) The bachelor's degree is above the master's degree, the master's degree is above the doctor, and the doctor's degree is above the postdoctoral degree. What about the postdoctoral degree? If you are brave enough, you will be a warrior after two years, a strong man after five years, and a martyr after seven years. The country will launch a saint, who will be bronze for two years, silver for five years and gold for seven years.

9) When we first went to college, we watched Struggle with longing. When we were hesitant, we watched Who is in charge of my youth. Just when we were about to be enlightened, a humble abode shot us all to death. In despair, when we saw Farewell Atlantis, we suddenly became calm. What house to buy? It will collapse sooner or later!

1) In high school, we are as busy as grandchildren, but we can still be as happy as SB; University, we are as idle as SB, but we can't find the happiness when we are grandchildren?

11) work, take a step back, love, take a step back and go to the empty building.

12) Many Beijingers like me and want to invite me to perform in Beijing, but I won't go. I said that if you like me, you can fly to Shanghai to see me, which will also boost Shanghai's GDP.

13) The stock market is related to the divorce rate. The divorce rate is normal below 2 points, and it rises above 3 points, reaching a new high above 6 points.

14) Shareholders always hear about making money, and they all encounter losses themselves. Don't believe when the bull market comes, and don't admit when the bear market comes.

15) house prices have become a permanent pain in the hearts of ordinary people. Tomson Yipin sold for 11, square meters a few years ago, but no one bought it. This year, it has risen to 161, square meters and several sets have been sold. Why do you say it has nothing to do with ordinary people? 16 thousand is a discount of 81 thousand square meters. Will you buy it? Still can't afford it, and then make a fracture price on 8 thousand, 41 thousand square meters, still can't afford it. I don't want such a house for me, because I can't afford the property management fee.

16) When you fail, take it as a life treasure; Success is a life of wealth.

17) When education is linked to money, teachers become bosses, students become apprentices, and parents become ATMs.

18) The mainstream audience of the Spring Festival Gala is 9 million farmers. If Zhou Libo is a side dish of Shanghai people, then Zhao Benshan is the northern dumpling of the whole people.

19) Money is yours only after it is used up. Open the wallet and look at the unused money. What is printed on it? China People's Bank? It's none of your business.

2) It's better to help leaders do 1 good things than to do one bad thing with them.

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21) What do white-collar workers mean? That is, all the wages received are used up, that is, the monthly salary is used to pay the mortgage, raise Xiaoning and foster parents, basically? White collar? Yes. If you have no desire, you will be rigid. People who grovel in the unit are people who have mortgage loans to pay back. Why are Japanese so polite? Because they all have loans.

22) You're more than greedy. You can't get rid of all the money when you see it. It's just in full bloom.

23) When I get rich, shall we buy lollipops and two? ! You watch me eat one, and I'll show you the other.

24) BBK lighter, I won't click anywhere, and my mother won't have to worry about my study anymore.

25) Don't think that just because you are tanned can cover up the fact that you are an idiot.

26) Brother, can you lower the resolution on your face?

27) I wanted to let the paper plane take me into your heart, but I crashed halfway.

28) If you comfort others, you can't comfort yourself after all.

29) If cutting off my hair means cutting off my memories, can I lose my memory if I cut my head?

3) If you don't die in silence, you are silent ...

31) It's not that I don't fold the quilt, but that I am nostalgic for the past, that is, I like the quilt I slept in the day before going to bed. I have to raise this living habit problem to personality cultivation.

32) The antonym of love is not not not to love but to have loved.

33) Philosophers are not legal ...

34) This girl, first of all, there is a generation gap between us. Secondly, you have no cleavage. How can we communicate?

35) knowledge is like underwear, invisible but important.

36) Choose 45 yourself? Look up to others, don't blame others? Looking down at you.

A selection of funny words to friends:

1) Jokes that amuse girls: In junior high school, a girl binged on milk in order to grow taller, only to grow breasts. One day, the teacher came into the classroom and saw two or three students sleeping on the table, so they woke up one by one. After returning to the podium, the teacher scanned the whole class, and finally divided ...

2) men into two types, one is lewd and the other is very lewd; There are two kinds of women, one is pretending to be pure, and the other is pretending to be impure.

3) I have only one wish every day? Still alive tomorrow!

4) I've been busy being bored!

5) If you don't fall asleep in class, you will get drunk on the wine table.

6) excuse me, miss, would you please remove your chest from my hand?

7) There are no birds during the day, and the birds are fine at night.

8) The three most painful things for men: being caught by a lover to accompany his wife to buy food; Being caught by his wife shopping with sympathizers; Stuck in an alley by his wife and lover at the same time.

9) The monk said? You think I'm a vegetarian? The nun said:? I haven't seen anything! ?

1) in the spring, you planted a girlfriend in the back hill, and in the autumn, you have a cuckold husband everywhere!

People who read funny words to their friends still read:

1. A complete collection of funny words to praise others

2. Funny farewell words to friends.