April fool's day prank short message daquan

April fool's day prank short message daquan

1, Wukong will be in a vertical position, leaving the Tathagata's palm, all the way, without a trace. When he was flying, he suddenly saw five red pillars. Wukong thought about the end of the day and stopped to pee under them. When I was about to leave, something suddenly occurred to me. I pulled out a hair, turned it into a coarse-ink double-brush pen, and wrote a big word on the middle pillar: a small step forward, a big step forward for civilization.

2. Married for many years, sleeping until midnight, my husband suddenly turned and hugged his wife and said, "This life is too short." The wife was moved to tears when she heard this sentence and was about to answer. The husband went on to say, "I can't even cover my feet."

I went to take a shower and met a bald brother with a tiger tattooed on his left and right arms. He asked me, "Is the tattoo nice?" I nodded bitterly. He said: "This tattoo has taught me a lot of truth, and it is my life creed gained in Jianghu for many years." "As brave as a tiger?" He smiled impudently and suddenly nodded thoughtfully: "Two tigers, two tigers, run, run ..."

4. Tang Priest: "I have decided not to talk anymore." Wukong: "Really?" Bajie: "Why?" Jason Wu: "Are you all right?" Xiao Bai: "Do you have bubbles in your mouth?" Tang Priest: "I didn't expect everyone to care so much about me, so I canceled my decision." All kinds of regrets!

5, set up a stall outside to calculate divination, was about to calculate divination for a beautiful woman, and suddenly it rained. When it rained, she got up and left. I quickly asked her, "Sincerity is spirit. Can such a small rain beat you? " As she walked, she said, "You can't calculate correctly anyway, and neither can you!" I am a little excited: "Not yet, how do you know!" "Ha ha, if you are accurate, can you go out without an umbrella? Get wet! "

6. "Honey, if I lose it one day, will you call me?" "Of course, who lost one hundred jins of meat don't find! ? "This is the warmest sentence I have heard today. Just what I want! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

7. Go out with an idiot friend to get money. When I arrived at the bank, I stopped at the front of the road as soon as I saw that there was no place to park. When I got off the bus to withdraw money, I told my friend that if a traffic policeman came to check illegal parking, you would call me. I was waiting in line when my friend shouted in a panic: big brother, the police are coming, run. The business hall is in chaos.

8. There is such a job that you need to respond at any time. You have skills in medicine, finance and cooking all year round. Always pay attention to each other's needs, even stay with each other all night, and give up your life when necessary. Not only is the salary zero, but you have to invest money in it every day. On this special day, let's shout out the name of this job together, yes, it is: husband!

9. Girlfriend: How was your application yesterday? Boyfriend: I made a mistake and blew it. what did you say ? The recruiter asked me if I wanted to, and I said I could do the job with my eyes closed. What's wrong with that? I was recruited as a janitor.

10, one day I took my nephew to the street to meet my ex-girlfriend. After my ex-girlfriend got married, she took her husband by the hand and tried to humiliate me. So he said, "Are you married?" I wonder how to answer her. Suddenly my nephew said, "Dad, let's eat ice cream!" " "Then he said to my ex-girlfriend," Mom, why didn't you come to see me for such a long time! " "After that, my ex-girlfriend's husband was in chaos. ?

1 1. I understand that every message I send you will be unforgettable! I know, every word I write to you makes you forget all about eating and sleeping! But I want to know, when will you treat me to the meal you owe me?

12, "Diet Poetry" does not eat, does not eat and eats; Thirst for eating; Have a bottle of coke and drink it again; Even eat and drink more; Returned home and regretted it; Never eat again next time; Regret regret and sleepy; Sleepy, sleepy, asleep; Snoring with a pillow; I dreamed that the meal was ready; Get up hungry again; Smell the rice before eating; Dinner went again; Anyway, this meal is not bad.

13, wife: Tell me about my advantages. Husband: gentle, kind, sexy, beautiful, smart, wise ... wife lamented: I am so excellent, how can I have a crush on you. Husband: Because I don't blush when I lie.

14, shh ... let me tell you a big secret. I won the lottery. Oh, five million! I've made up my mind: 6,543.8+0,000 will be donated to charity, 6,543.8+0,000 to students, and the remaining 3 million will be shared by us. Loyal enough! All right, forget it. I'll buy lottery tickets first.

15, don't move Fight, fight, fight, rob, rob, understand? Take out your sorrow, hand over your sorrow, take out your troubles, put down your sorrow, and pack it all for me to take away. Warning you not to frown when you are bored; Don't get angry when you are annoyed; Don't cry when it hurts; Do not allow sadness; Loneliness is to find friends, trouble is to find happiness; Don't ask me why, you must do it!

16, why did I leave you for a long time? Why do you worry me so much? Why do you always appear in my dreams? I thought for a long time and finally understood: because you still owe me a meal?

17, I am a low-key person. I only rinse hot pot in summer and eat popsicles in winter. When it rains, I wander in the street. When it thunders, I stand under the tree. When it is windy, I spill water all over the floor. When I eat, I paste my mouth and drool when I look at you. I just want to tell you in a low-key way: I miss the day when you invited me to dinner!

18, fat paper is really hard. If you eat less after a meal, others will say: pretend, eat so little; Then eat more, have something to say, eat so much, you pig; Finally, simply stop eating, ah, lose weight, the sun comes out in the west; Fuck you, fat man is not a person ... Turn around with the same feeling!

19, after being cold for so long, did you freeze? Did you let the cold wind freeze your tears? I love you, miss you and see you, but I'm afraid you'll get thinner in that cold wind. Besides waiting, I also have greetings. Go back to the house and add clothes. I don't know how to get home when it's cold!

I want to say a word to you. I'm afraid you won't listen, I'm afraid you'll think twice, I'm afraid you won't listen, I'm afraid you'll ask too seriously, I'm afraid you won't understand, I'm afraid you won't be able to sleep without listening. This isn't it? Now, you are still staring at the text message. In fact, I just want to say to you: take an early rest every day, play mobile phone moderately, and sleep is the most important thing.

2 1, buddy, what have you been up to recently? I miss the carefree and carefree days when I chatted with you. Hehe, I saw you that day-your most lovely day. You are very uncomfortable sitting in the sun. I asked you what you were doing, and you smiled mysteriously: "Keep your voice down, no one will call me an idiot after tanning!" " "

22. Self-summary at the end of the year on the road to becoming rich: China develops at the speed of 4G, Ma Yun connects at the speed of wifi, Li Ka-shing remembers at the speed of 3G, and Wang Sicong watches at the speed of 2G. It's just that we can't find it, and we don't even have contact. We've been busy for half a lifetime, and finally turned off the phone automatically. . .

23. Please describe your current mood in three words: boring, eating, wanting to curse, sleepy, full, a little bored, very idle, living too tired, wanting to travel, very helpless, very happy, still alive, adolescence, menopause, illness, stress, entanglement, no company, loneliness and depravity. If you have no choice, then you miss me.

24, you didn't sleep well, (*) _ (*) Your eyes are swollen, so you think ~. ~ doze off, give you [_]o a cup of coffee, let you @[emailprotected] refresh yourself, try to make money, _ _ invite me to dinner!

25, cucumber lies in shooting, happiness lies in "hey"; The mind is a commodity, not an ornament. The more you use it, the more spiritual it becomes. The tattoo is not necessarily a rogue, he may be Yue Fei; A smile is brighter than a dog's tail in the sun.

26. There is always one thing that haunts me, but I will never mention it again. There is always a love in my life that reminds me from time to time, but it has always been in my distant mind. There is always a person who will always remember, but will always live in a lonely heart. Oh, honey, who are you? I can't remember at the moment.

27. In the vast sea of people, my heart is broken for you. You seem indifferent, but you make me feel boring. Your indifference makes me afraid to confess, but I can't extricate myself. Now I want you to understand ... you're stepping on my foot!

28, bursts of cold wind, wandering around; Deep friendship, cherished in the bottom of my heart; Missing, brewing in my heart; Sweet wishes are delivered at your fingertips. Scientific research shows that writing warm brand short messages to friends has magical anti-freezing effect. If you forward them in a large area, winter will be as warm as spring!

29. "How to get to the Youth Overseas Chinese Town Creative Park" was once again stopped to ask for directions. I used to tell him in the opposite direction, and then I felt smug that I had cheated someone. Now I won't. Maybe I'm past my childish age. I told him patiently: "There are two traffic lights ahead, turn left at the second crossing, and walk 50 meters to see a pedestrian street. How many people are there in that street? Ask them how to get there. "

30. "On the bus, a standing pregnant woman said to the man sitting next to her," Don't you know I'm pregnant? "The man said nervously," the child is not mine! "

3 1. A customer went to a snack bar to eat steamed stuffed buns, took a bite and found no stuffing. I took another bite and found no stuffing. Strangely asked: "waiter, why is this steamed stuffed bun less stuffed?" The waiter said, "thick-skinned." The customer took a few more bites until the stuffing was not found after eating the steamed stuffed bun, and asked the waiter again. The waiter said, "You may be eating steamed bread."

32. I look up at you at a 45-degree angle, looking at your tall and straight figure, your majestic and motionless standing posture, and the way Mount Tai collapses in front of me without chaos. What I want to say is, how can you be so calm? Telephone poles! ?

33. A young couple flirts by phone every day. One day, my boyfriend caught a cold and lost his voice. The girl didn't know this, so she called and said, "Dear, I miss you very much!" " Then, the boy said to her hoarsely, "honey, I miss you, too!" "The girl paused, and then said," Sorry, uncle, I'm looking for your son. "

34. I got drunk in the restaurant. I opened the photo album and saw the faces of my old classmates become so strange that I couldn't help crying. The boss came to comfort me: "Why are you crying about our menu?"

35. A classmate weighs 300 Jin. During a physical examination, the doctor looked at his figure and said, "Don't weigh it, write it yourself." My buddy hesitated for a long time with a pen. He thought it was not good to write 150kg, so he wrote 0.15t.

36. The classmate party said that I can play mahjong, but I can't, so Xueba told me a very awesome formula: n*AAA+m*ABC+DD are all nonsense, mn can be equal to 0, and I learned mahjong in one minute.

37. Customer: "I want to make a complaint. Since I used the hair tonic I bought from you, why did I lose all my hair? " Shop assistant: "sir. If you want to grow new hair, you must make room for it first. "

38. A group of female colleagues chatted, and two of them were pregnant, so they talked about pregnancy. When talking about pregnancy before marriage, I said that many men get on the bus before buying tickets ... At this moment, a male colleague next to them said, "That's because tickets are too difficult to buy now!" " "

39. One day, the child asked his father, "Dad, what kind of cigarette is this?" Dad: "Remember, smoke is a chimney." Child: "Oh, I see! Why is dad's nose not called' chimney'? "

40. "During this time, I quarreled with my wife every day." "Can you argue with her?" "Every time I talk to the end, she doesn't say anything." "So powerful, what did you say?" "I said, I'm sorry, I was wrong."

4 1. When you are young, you will bump into a deer in the heart of the person you like. When I grow up, I finally meet a person who has a slight affection, but I feel that the deer in my heart is old. The goods are crossing their legs and squinting and saying, "Is it him?" Are you sure? My eyes are getting worse. "Then the deer waved:" Don't hit, don't hit, don't bother to hit unless he pays. "

42, by bus, there are many people, a beautiful woman is next to me, and now I am holding her hand, and she calls me crazy ... I roared, "I don't care if the child is not mine!" " The eyes of the whole car! Ha ha laugh ... I saw her crying and shouting, "Why don't you even let your sister go?" ! "

43. A couple went to the photo studio to take wedding photos. The woman wanted to take a theme wedding photo and asked about the price. The staff said how much is this and how much is that. The boyfriend listened impatiently: "Why is it so expensive?" Staff: "The main reason is that clothes are expensive." Boyfriend: "Then give us an Adam and Eve series."

44. Although the ugly duckling is in China, she is ambitious and has been working hard silently. Finally, on this day, he packed his bags and said "goodbye, mom, I'm going to Beijing to catch roast meat." Send a cold joke to cool you down, haha!

45. When the school began to welcome new students, I saw a girl holding something. I hurried forward and said to her, "Come, let me help you carry it." "No, I'll carry it myself." She stood in front of the ATM and said coldly to me.

April Fool's Day pranks friends and text messages.

1, Twitter, Twitter, there are really many strange things today. Birds in the sky learn to swim, and fish in the water learn to fly. This is not the most unusual. There is a little pig reading the information, and its trotters are pressed again and again, laughing while reading the information!

I just chatted with my friends, and some of them talked about you, do you know? I quarreled with them and almost got into a fight, because some of them said you looked like a monkey and some said you looked like an orangutan. It was really too much! I don't care about you at all.

3. I have been in a bad mood recently, and I have entered a depressed state, becoming autistic and anxious. I hope my friends can invite me to try ice cream, have dinner, watch movies, sing songs and drink coffee to enlighten me. You'd better send me an IpHONE6, a watch, a bag, gold bars, etc. Help me out of the low tide with love and tolerance, and let me know that there are still true feelings in the world.

On this sauna day, only the electric fan can run around you, only Tom cat can talk to you, only the sun umbrella can protect you from the scorching sun, only mosquitoes can spend it with you, and only I can't forget to send you a message. I solemnly remind you: sauna days, pay attention to heatstroke prevention!

5. In summer, the weather is a little hot, the air is a little sticky, the sweat is a little salty, and the mood is a little annoying. Sitting in the lonely window, listening to the splash of thoughts, I don't want to let my heart go far, I just hope you can find out-there are still a few confessions hidden in my heart: Dear, the weather is really hot, please treat me to ice cream to cool down!

6, 20xx If it is dark, then I miss you; If the ground sinks, then I miss you; If there is a tsunami, I look forward to you. If you haven't received my message, it's that your mobile phone is going to drop. If you don't reply to me, haha, then you owe me a beating!

According to statistics, one in every three people is brain-damaged. Anyway, I'm not, and statisticians don't receive this information like that. As a third person, haha, just kidding, be happy!

8. Your plan passed and you became famous in CCTV. Your suggestion was adopted and you began to put it into action. Your order has arrived, and the Enterprise has come back to life. Or the boss will praise: a well-bred pig is just different!

I really like your big ears, wide face, thick lips and black eyes. Your singing is great, and the lyrics are always in the same tune-hum-hum. You are my pet pig!

10. As soon as I entered the village yesterday, I saw a man chasing a fat pig with a glass in his hand. He chased and shouted, why are you running? Do you want to cheat? If you are brothers, you have to drink this cup! On closer inspection, it turns out that this drunkard is you.

165438+ !

12, you like to clean the floor every day, your figure is graceful, your personality is shy and silent, you are maverick, and your efforts are not feminine. You will be a story, a lovely mop!

13, a puppy whispered to a mouse: Do you like me? The mouse said affectionately, I really like you. You can read text messages and pretend to be human.

14, the cockroach met an angel, and the angel said to the cockroach, what wish can I help you realize? Cockroach spoke his mind: I want to get my favorite, which is this pile of shit reading materials.

15, you are really not smart enough, and your nose is like an old prick; Eyes like red pepper; Eyebrows are like two knives; Walk on both sides; Like a crab, still drunk.

16. Are your ears itchy? Does that mean I miss you and my eyes itch? Does this mean that I want to see you? Does your mouth itch? That means I want to kiss you. Does it itch? That means don't be paranoid, it's almost lice, so take a shower quickly!

17, it's snowing, and you're walking alone under the eaves. Pedestrians were shivering with cold, and suddenly they heard a cry of catching thieves, and they accidentally dropped their hands and got caught in the head. I hope that Tiandao craft will be full of energy and turn information readers into puppies.

18, pain belongs to others', happiness belongs to you, trouble belongs to others', happiness belongs to you, sadness belongs to others', smile belongs to you, only one thing is not yours, it belongs to others'. Do you know what this is? A clever mind.

19, there is a horse on the grassland, but unfortunately there is no name. One day, God passed by and asked God for a name. God said, you are one in a million, just in case.

Shenma is excited: I have a name. In case I am something. . . . .

What I don't understand is this horse! ! !

20. New use of mobile phone: The applicable population is young women. Usage: set the mobile phone to vibrate, put it in the left and right coat pockets in turn, and dial it several times. On the tenth day, the chest is not negotiable!

2 1, I will tell a fool when I am sad, share it with a fool when I am happy, and accompany a fool when I travel. Want to know who that fool is? That man is reading a text message.

22. The forest is full of trees, and white clothes are better than snow. I sit on my knees, stroking the lyre, and you stand, my only confidant. So, you and I have made a long-standing story, casting pearls before swine.

23. If you are busy, I'd like to make a top to revolve around you. If you are happy, I am willing to be a pistachio and talk to you; If you have money, hey hey, raise your hand and grab it!

24. The most romantic thing I think of is to say to you in the morning: You are so beautiful! That's great. Great! I think this will make you happy all day. But I can't do this often, because it's not good to lie often.

25. Boss: People who often write empty checks to fool you; Opponent: someone who has been happy because you are unhappy; Friends: people who often harass you in the middle of the night for no reason; Me: Sorry to bother you.

Classic funny and tricky quotations on April Fool's Day in 2020

1. Kill you with what, dear.

Your mobile phone is cheaper than the phone bill.

Xiu Yuan Road is far away, so let's take a taxi.

4. Being beautiful is not dependent on parents, but living beautifully is the real skill.

5. I will cry when I am sad and laugh when I grow up.

6. The most brilliant moment of Apple was hitting Newton on the head.

7. Look back once in a while, otherwise you will keep looking and don't know what you have lost.

8. I used a little skill to double my chances of winning the lottery! Just buy two lottery tickets!

9. Confucius said: Sleepless at noon, collapse at noon. Mencius said: Confucius is right!

10, I have to watch the Forbes rich list every morning when I get up. If my name is not on it, I will go to work.

1 1, there are too many liars and obviously not enough fools.

12. If a woman is a book, many women have only one page: one page has a car, one page has a room, and the other page has a ticket.

13. I knew it was so difficult to find a girlfriend, so I decided to kiss the doll.

14, watching TV yesterday and saying "sudden death caused by smoking" scared me! I bite my teeth and stomp my feet to make up my mind! "Don't watch TV in the future."

15, now many non-mainstream girls like to write "I" as "e" when chatting. In fact, what is the implication? ...

16, son. One day your computer was infected with a virus. It means that you have grown up.

17, what makes us feel sorry for the thick legs in the season of black silk flooding?

18, Titanic gave me years, but I couldn't find anyone to watch it with me.

19, you are wearing dangerous clothes, but it looks safe.

20, April Fool's Day three from the four virtues: from the recent beginning, from the most intimate relationship, from the best temper; Students can be fooled, colleagues can be fooled, close friends can be teased and lovers can be entertained.

2 1, April Fool's Day, don't worry, April Fool's Day, don't worry, April Fool's Day, pay attention, April Fool's Day, don't be sincere, April Fool's Day should be happy!

22. You were born with a spiral head, your face is black and your fingers are invisible, and two leaves cover your face. The rivers and lakes fly over the eaves and walk on the walls, attracting chickens, flying dogs and barking, and the beauty is dumbfounded. I think I am the leader of the Beggars' Sect, but I actually live in a mental hospital. If you don't accept this statement, see you on April Fool's Day!

On April Fool's Day, a fool is a fool, a fool is a fool, a fool is a fool, a fool is a fool, a fool is a fool, a fool is a fool, a fool is a fool, a fool is a fool, and a fool is a fool. Are you happy? Happy April Fool's Day!

24. Today's April Fool's Day, I made a special April Fool's Day order and learned to call a puppy. It was a wonderful mood; Laugh at the sky three times, and good luck will continue; I advise you to implement it quickly and travel quickly. Ask why, fools don't obey orders, fools don't listen to orders.

25. Bajie Huazhai is gone forever. One day, a man who looks like Bajie came from a distance. Wukong said it might be a demon, and Tang Priest said, Try sending a text message, or you will quit!

26, April Fool's Day, fool you, how can I bear to be "stupid"? To tell you the truth, I am "stupid" and unhappy! In order to be "stupid" and have fun with you, I am "stupid" and have been a friend for many years, so I advise you: Happy April Fool's Day!

I really like your big ears, wide face, thick lips and black eyes. Your singing is great, and the lyrics are always in the same tune-hum-hum. You are my pet pig!

28. A snake woke up one day, climbed out of the lake and bit the cake. For some unknown reason, its body kept shaking, and then it was caught by the farmer. Haha, happy April Fool's Day!

29. I see vicissitudes in your brow, confidence in your eyes, years on your forehead and leeks between your lips and teeth. Go brush your teeth!

30. Has anyone ever told you that your looks are unique? Thick eyebrows like Zhu Shimao, high nose like Jiancang, and the corners of his mouth are even more curled than those of a star boy. Fool you, fool you: Happy April Fool's Day!

202 1 April Fool's Classic Funny and Tricky Quotations

1. Kill you with what, dear.

Your mobile phone is cheaper than the phone bill.

Xiu Yuan Road is far away, so let's take a taxi.

4. Being beautiful is not dependent on parents, but living beautifully is the real skill.

5. I will cry when I am sad and laugh when I grow up.

6. The most brilliant moment of Apple was hitting Newton on the head.

7. Look back once in a while, otherwise you will keep looking and don't know what you have lost.

8. I used a little skill to double my chances of winning the lottery! Just buy two lottery tickets!

9. Confucius said: Sleepless at noon, collapse at noon. Mencius said: Confucius is right!

10, I have to watch the Forbes rich list every morning when I get up. If my name is not on it, I will go to work.

1 1, there are too many liars and obviously not enough fools.

12. If a woman is a book, many women have only one page: one page has a car, one page has a room, and the other page has a ticket.

13. I knew it was so difficult to find a girlfriend, so I decided to kiss the doll.

14, watching TV yesterday and saying "sudden death caused by smoking" scared me! I bite my teeth and stomp my feet to make up my mind! "Don't watch TV in the future."

15, now many non-mainstream girls like to write "I" as "e" when chatting. In fact, what is the implication? ...

16, son. One day your computer was infected with a virus. It means that you have grown up.

17, what makes us feel sorry for the thick legs in the season of black silk flooding?

18, Titanic gave me years, but I couldn't find anyone to watch it with me.

19, you are wearing dangerous clothes, but it looks safe.

20, April Fool's Day three from the four virtues: from the recent beginning, from the most intimate relationship, from the best temper; Students can be fooled, colleagues can be fooled, close friends can be teased and lovers can be entertained.

2 1, April Fool's Day, don't worry, April Fool's Day, don't worry, April Fool's Day, pay attention, April Fool's Day, don't be sincere, April Fool's Day should be happy!

22. You were born with a spiral head, your face is black and your fingers are invisible, and two leaves cover your face. The rivers and lakes fly over the eaves and walk on the walls, attracting chickens, flying dogs and barking, and the beauty is dumbfounded. I think I am the leader of the Beggars' Sect, but I actually live in a mental hospital. If you don't accept this statement, see you on April Fool's Day!

On April Fool's Day, a fool is a fool, a fool is a fool, a fool is a fool, a fool is a fool, a fool is a fool, a fool is a fool, a fool is a fool, a fool is a fool, and a fool is a fool. Are you happy? Happy April Fool's Day!

24. Today's April Fool's Day, I made a special April Fool's Day order and learned to call a puppy. It was a wonderful mood; Laugh at the sky three times, and good luck will continue; I advise you to implement it quickly and travel quickly. Ask why, fools don't obey orders, fools don't listen to orders.

25. Bajie Huazhai is gone forever. One day, a man who looks like Bajie came from a distance. Wukong said it might be a demon, and Tang Priest said, Try sending a text message, or you will quit!

26, April Fool's Day, fool you, how can I bear to be "stupid"? To tell you the truth, I am "stupid" and unhappy! In order to be "stupid" and have fun with you, I am "stupid" and have been a friend for many years, so I advise you: Happy April Fool's Day!

I really like your big ears, wide face, thick lips and black eyes. Your singing is great, and the lyrics are always in the same tune-hum-hum. You are my pet pig!

28. A snake woke up one day, climbed out of the lake and bit the cake. For some unknown reason, its body kept shaking, and then it was caught by the farmer. Haha, happy April Fool's Day!

29. I see vicissitudes in your brow, confidence in your eyes, years on your forehead and leeks between your lips and teeth. Go brush your teeth!

30. Has anyone ever told you that your looks are unique? Thick eyebrows like Zhu Shimao, high nose like Jiancang, and the corners of his mouth are even more curled than those of a star boy. Fool you, fool you: Happy April Fool's Day!