Joke Collection Website - Cold jokes - Triple door continues high score
Triple door continues high score
Soon, Yu Xiong's two assistants in their thirties arrived.
It's not a loss for an assistant to be an assistant They are all yellow, fat and short. Although their arms are still tall and strong enough, their legs are short and fat, like barrels. It's easy to stay in the team, although it only has the function of assistant and has no ability to help.
Yu Xiang looked at the two darumas and thought they were more likely to fall.
"Sit down" Yu Xiong smiled at the tumbler, took out three packs of Chinese cigarettes and gave one to each of the two assistants.
The two assistants didn't answer, took the cigarette, sat on the opposite bed, opened the cigarette and smoked selflessly.
Just when they didn't know how to improve the atmosphere, an assistant spit out a cigarette: "Shit, which bird dares to bully you?"
Yu Xiong doesn't want to compete with the bird: "Liu Mang is this man".
"What kind of bird is Liu Mang-I've never heard of it, man, leave me alone," said an assistant.
"There's no need to chop elder brother, I'll do it," said another assistant.
Can you fucking win? This is really like two tumblers ―― there is nothing in it, even if there is, it is cement and sand. Lin Yuxiang secretly cursed in his mind.
"See how Lao tze put that fellow back into his mother's belly. -I'm afraid I'll squeeze out all the fucking yolks as soon as I make a move. " The man named Brother Chop proudly said to Yu Xiong.
"Well, thank you." Yu Xiong smiled. "Wait a minute, two brothers. Brother Xiang and I will go outside to prepare. " .
Yu Xiang followed Yu Xiong out.
Watching him walk down the stairs, Yu Xiang complained to Yu Xiong, "You don't treat me like a brother. Don't say that we want to fight together, why should we lower our status and call me' Ge Xiang'? "
"Ha ha, that's it? You don't even know this? This is a common address for people who mix in the world ―― add the word "elder brother" at the end of the name, and there is a customary address called "eldest brother". Suddenly, I realized that Lin Yuxiang had never experienced this kind of gangster life, and I couldn't help worrying about him: "Forget it, you still don't go, you don't understand these basics, and you will suffer." "
Rain Xiang is glad that his name is not "Wei". After hearing Yu Xiong say so, he looks cheerful and has a proud voice:
"I thought it was a super affordable iron buddy. It turned out to be such a timid guy." It turned out that two assistants were standing on the stairs.
"Who said I wouldn't go?" Rain xiang nu way.
Yu Xiong: "This ..."
"Love him, right? Give him another 300 and he won't go, or we won't go. " The way to call brother Kan.
"Well," Yu Xiong without thinking.
"Don't" Lin Yuxiang said quickly.
"He went to the momentum is very strong. Well, if you can't beat him, let him go first, "another assistant suggested." "
Because he insisted on going, Yu Xiong had to reluctantly agree.
The meeting place is the playground.
When they came to the playground, the other four people had been waiting for a long time. By this time, I had finished my evening lessons, and even Yuanyang, who can be a 3000-girl in spring night, was finished.
The playground looks even more gloomy in the dim light, and the Jade Rabbit hides in the boundless darkness because of the rain.
"Jian Wendi, don't you dare mess with our brothers, you don't fucking want to mix up." Tell Brother Chop to scold.
At this time, Yu Xiang and Yu Xiong went ahead. Two assistants were thrown ten meters away because of their fat legs. Yu Xiang looked at two people walking fart Dian fart, chop elder brother said is "you and he don't mix up" homophonic, somehow thought of maggots.
"You his mama don't want to mix up, we mang elder brother but failed in every course, bought the school-this is at least similar to an official, you fucking know? Since you have so much money, you should always have a place in school and society ... "said a man next to Mang.
Brother Kan disdainfully interrupted: "I'm afraid I have no money to spend." Today is just the day to nourish my life. " Brother Kan laughed a few times and said to another assistant beside him in a low voice, "Brother Neng, why don't you scold?"
Brother Neng turned his voice down to the decibel that mosquitoes would envy and shouted at him, "I think there is something wrong. Most of them are more than that ... "Speaking of which, his face is red enough to excite cows all over the world. Then I attached myself to Brother Chop and whispered.
At this time, Yu Xiang and Yu Xiong went ahead. Yu Xiong looked back and saw that there was still some distance from the two assistants. He said to Yuxiang, "Run if the momentum is not right. Don't work too hard. You must live well for me! "
"Well, I know." In order not to worry him, Yu Xiang nodded his head. To change the subject, he asked, "Didn't you know these two assistants before?"
"Well, they just pay, so when you are tired, you have to go." Yu Xiong's face is very dignified
"Is there any foreign aid?"
Yu Xiong shook his head.
"Why not invite more people?"
I don't have much money
Just friends.
"I don't want to involve my friends, so you have to go." Yu Xiong is irrefutable. Say that finish, look down at the ground.
Two people fell silent.
The faint light feebly dispelled the endless darkness. However, light can only go as far as it can-in this world, where there is no light, isn't it all darkness?
Liu Mang and his party are tired of waiting. Scold: "want to delay the time? Haha, a group of women, come on! "
"On you? How? Yours is a man, have you been cheated? Oh, I'm really sorry. It's not a man's business. If you want a man to fuck you, you should always have abnormal surgery! " The sound came from behind. Yu Xiang turned and looked, and the original speaker was Yu Xiang's junior high school classmate. Zhao Xihe. Yu Xiang remembered that this gentleman loved justice almost as much as Hugo, Beethoven and Tolstoy. Of course, in this era, people who love justice are bound to stumble, and this gentleman has not been spared-this man once kept saying that "money is like dirt" and put it into action-and never took money. So there is no money for emergencies, and there are countless jokes. What he didn't expect was that in a history exam, one question was: Fill in Mao Zedong's date of birth and date of death. Because the teacher didn't say it, I couldn't fill it in. He thinks the whole class didn't get it right, but he is the only one who didn't. Afterwards, the teacher severely scolded him, saying that as long as Mao Zedong's date of birth and date of death were posted on the RMB with a face value greater than 50 cents. Then we educate him with a "long-term view of history" ourselves, and we can know how much Marx's coat is worth from Qin Shihuang's unified currency to Marxist economics and then to Marxist economics. From then on, Zhao Xihe changed his view of "treating money as dung", but wanted to make dung into fertile soil, burnt brick, so as to achieve the goal of "turning dung into money".
Lin Yuxiang didn't have much contact with Zhao Xihe because of his nervous study in junior high school. Only then did I realize the importance of friends. When I saw Zhao Xihe coming to me, I lured him: "Xihe, help us win this battle, and I will give you 500."
Lin Yuxiang thinks that Zhao Xihe must value money after being educated. I don't know, when people who really love justice reach a certain level, their sense of justice will be ever-present, and they will never change, let alone change. People often say that "the benevolent suffers the most" is the truth.
Zhao Xihe is undoubtedly a benevolent man.
"Lin Yuxiang, don't say so, I just don't like Liu Mang such a bossy person. It's right to hit such people. Don't talk about money, we will win. There are some friends behind Yu Xiong, who will come soon. I also called President Qian. "
Liu Mang's face has just been scolded black and blue. I don't know what I want to scold back. At this moment, I couldn't bear it any longer. I roared, "Brother Yu, are you going to war soon?"
"Opened" Brother Neng and Brother Chop arrived in Yu Xiong after the arrival of Harmony. Say that finish, holding a fist will rush forward to beat Liu Mang.
Unexpectedly, two bruisers emerged from the bushes and stood beside Liu Mang with a lost face.
Brother neng and brother chop were surprised, and their faces were immediately filled with smiles. As they walked, they apologized to Liu Mang and said that they were joking just now and they were willing to help Liu Mang.
These two men put Confucius's "more than enough" and "all men are brothers within the four seas" into action, overturning the conclusion of "which is lighter". It's like a have it both ways, a China official who goes with the flow.
Yu Xiong became callous and stared at Brother Neng and Brother Chop coldly. Then calmly tunnel: "Yu Xiang, Xi Rong, you go quickly."
Yu Xiang read sincere concern from his eyes, just like a gorgeous meteor, unable to independently hang high in the sky and do rapid movements. I don't know the direction or the future, but I don't want to bump into other planets. I can't change my desolation I just want to keep other planets away from me. ...
Zhao Xihe walked up to Yu Xiong and told him to stall for time. Yu Xiong asked Zhao Xihe why, but Zhao Xihe didn't answer, but scolded Brother Neng and Brother Jian: "Fucking bastards, eight generations of you have sores on your heads, pimples on your ass and pus on your hooves ..." While scolding, he looked at each other's situation. But strangely, Liu Mang ignored the shelter of Brother Neng and Brother Chop, and just calmly faced Yu Xiong.
Later, Zhao Xihe even scolded "peeking at the old woman taking a bath" and "living by drinking the boy's urine". And make up stories from time to time.
Brother Neng and Brother Kan are too busy to talk to Zhao Xi, because Liu Mang ignores them. Just to see Liu Mang's face. Liu Mang and everyone laughed because of Zhao Xi's harmonious bristle. Brother Neng and Brother Chop are not sure whether Liu Mang will accept them. They are worried at the moment.
Later, Brother Neng couldn't help cursing back: "My mother".
Zhao Xi harmoniously changed from active to passive: "Your mother and I".
Brother Neng cursed again: "I am your wife".
Zhao Xihe also cursed: "I am your stepmother", which is obviously more weighty than the other party's words, because Zhao Xihe's wife is unknown, at least seven years later, and Brother Neng's stepmother may not necessarily appear at any time. So Zhao Xihe naturally gained the upper hand. This is why the survival period is always more convenient than the survival period.
Everyone burst into laughter for a while.
Brother Neng saw everyone laughing and stood there awkwardly. At a loss.
"Yu Xiong, why didn't you call us?" Six students came running behind, and Yu Xiong arrived in the blink of an eye. "You are really, why didn't you call us?" "You know that the other party will invite many people, and you don't treat us as brothers." Someone complained to Yu Xiong.
Yu Xiong's throat moved heavily, but he didn't speak after all.
-this kind of complaint is a person who meets by chance? Was it made by a duplicitous person? How many people in the world can express such complaints and concerns? Since ocean deep, isn't language superfluous?
Zhao Xihe was overjoyed to see these people coming. After greeting, he looked at Brother Neng and Brother Chop, anxious as bricks on hot bricks: "Fight Brother Neng and Brother Chop first."
Brother Kan and Brother Neng knew that there was no hope of turning back, and cold sweat rolled down their cheeks. Looking at Liu Mang and others, but there was no response. So he immediately took out a knife. Shouted at Liu Mang and others: "Brothers, hurry up."
Zhao Xihe also took out a knife bigger than the sum of the two knives and said, "Admit planting."
"Don't try to get through here alive" Zhao Xihe's tone is firm.
Brother neng raised his bright machete and gnashed his teeth. "Nothing can pass, chop." At this time, Brother Neng's voice began to tremble, soft as a piece of tofu, and with an improper pause, people who didn't know the inside story thought it was a kind mother encouraging her frustrated son to say, "Nothing can pass."
Say that finish, see Liu Mang still nothing happened, obviously won't help. So the whole body began to collapse, and the legs seemed to have no bones, and they fell down, and their eyes were dull with fear. I shit all over my crotch, and the smell is scattered in the turbid air. Everything that can be physically attached to the ground is attached to the ground. Weak and boneless, like a maggot crawling on the ground.
Somehow, Yu Xiang thought of maggots. Boneless maggots with attached bones.
Liu Mang was still not angry, but proudly rushed to Yu Xiong and said, "Indeed, it is insidious to use reinforcements to increase the psychological pressure of the other side and try to overwhelm the other side in imposing manner. But ... "Say that finish, four bruisers came out of the grass next to them and stood side by side with Liu Mang.
What the fuck is going on here? Lin Yuxiang thought.
In fact, what is more important than momentum when the two sides fight? If you win in the battle, you win at least half. It is often the truth to overcome the strong with the weak.
What Liu Mang has done is simply to excel in imposing manner. And more importantly, he is also worried about really fighting with Yu Xiong. He's just here for show. Yu Xiong wanted to fight one-on-one and avenge the past, but thinking that he would not come alone, he paid for Brother Chop and Brother Neng, just in case.
"Liu Mang, not say good one-on-one hit? There is a kind of one-on-one hit "Lin Yuxiang heard a blunt provocation from Yu Xiong's words.
"Why?" Liu Mang's eyes generate shine more cruelly than the night.
I don't know when the wind blew in the cloudy sky and shook the surrounding trees unscrupulously. Under the dim light, the swaying trees make the light more elusive ... the thick twilight becomes more crazy and violent ... it seems to want to devour the world!
Rain Xiang took a machete about two feet long from Zhao Xihe and greeted the people who rushed over. ...
Lin Yuxiang had Nie Zheng's state of mind of "carefree" and "a scholar dies for his bosom friend", so he cut it in Liu Mang. Then it's as bad as Gao Jianli ―― useless. Liu Mang struggled to raise his knife, and also cut it at Yu Xiang. The two knives collided and made a harsh sound. Rain Xiang is in danger, but he won't last for a while. When the knife fell to the ground, people stumbled and fell to the ground. Liu Mang saw that it was now or never, so he cut Xiangyu's leg with a knife. Yu Xiang kicked him. Yu Xiang's foot came first. He kicked Liu Mang in the stomach. However, Liu Mang's knife didn't slow down. It hit Yu Xiang's thigh. Yu Xiang only felt a numbness in his legs, black at the moment, and his thoughts began to get confused. In the twilight, he saw a knife coming at him.
He suddenly felt like Jing Ke who had lost his weapon and his leg was injured. Then he remembered Jing Ke's generosity and tragic condemnation of Qin. I can't help but make up my mind to die as valuable as Jing.
With this idea, I don't know why I have a power that I have never had before, so I caught it on the knife.
Fortunately, it was the back of the knife, but Liu Mang didn't neglect it when he saw it, and the pneumatic handle turned.
Lin Yuxiang, after all, is not as good as Lu Xiaofeng in ancient times, and his palms are stirred like jade's face. Instinctively, the other hand also grasped the knife, and after grasping it, squeezed it tightly, just like Beethoven who grabbed fate by the throat.
Liu Mang looked at it more carefully.
Lin Yuxiang is persevering desperately and refuses to relax at all.
Time is flowing, and the blood on Lin Yuxiang's leg is flowing bit by bit.
Suddenly, the figure of President Qian appeared in Lin Yuxiang's sight.
When Lin Yuxiang saw President Qian, his eyes suddenly lit up and he felt that he was going to be saved.
"Here" Lin Yuxiang seems to have caught the straw that saved his life.
It's a pity that the straw won't move by itself. President Qian just stood quietly, which is completely beyond the realm of Buddhism.
President Qian just stared at Lin Yuxiang, but his feet stood like stakes, just like scarecrows.
"You are crazy" Lin Yuxiang roared.
President Qian trembled, came to his senses, his frightened eyes were full of consternation, and then he shouted the most emotional and true sentence in his life, "Mom, you killed someone!" Then I began to fly away from Yuxiang. Blink and disappear. It's a pity that national athletes don't have such explosive power.
Lin Yuxiang was a little upset by President Qian's intervention, and his knife plunged into Yuxiang's shoulder like a tiger going down the mountain.
"ah!" Lin Yuxiang let out a cry of heartbreaking. Then I felt my arm numb, my eyes blurred and I lost consciousness.
Yu Xiong just pressed his opponent to the ground at this time. When he heard Yu Xiang's miserable cry, he immediately let go of his opponent and rushed to Liu Mang.
Liu Mang drew a knife from Yu Xiang's shoulder and was about to cut it down again. ...
Yu Xiong rushed over and was also cut off by a knife. But he rushed to Liu regardless of the pain.
Liu Mang was knocked down and passed out.
Zhao Xihe immediately gave up his opponent after hearing Yu Xiang's tragic voice and turned to ask for it. Just as he turned around, his opponent's knife fell on his back. He ran to find Yuxiang in despair.
The opponent chased him with a knife.
Yu Xiong saw his opponent chasing Zhao Xihe and kicked him in the stomach. The man was kicked and rolled on the ground in pain.
Unexpectedly, just now Yu Xiong's opponent has reached behind Yu Xiong and plunged into Yu Xiong's left leg. ...
At this time, Zhao Xihe has picked up Lin Yuxiang and ran towards the distance.
When the man sees it, he will go after it. Unexpectedly, Yu Xiong's hands gripped his legs tightly. The good man was flustered, and the knife in his hand sent a terrible attack to Yu Xiong's brain. ...
However, Yu Xiong's hand did not relax at all. ...
Lin Yuxiang woke up in the hospital three days later and saw Zhao Xihe lying beside him, wrapped in gauze everywhere, and needles poured into the red and swollen back of his hand like running water. Look at yourself, the situation is almost the same as that of Zhao Xi harmony. The difference is that Zhao Xihe's injury is much heavier than his.
At this time, Zhao Qian woke up, and when she woke up, a gratified smile appeared on her anxious face: "Don't talk to me, or your blood pressure will rise. Have a good rest, I'm tired, sleep for a while ... "Then he lay down gently and closed his eyes.
How much gratitude welled up in Yu Xiang's heart, and then was attacked by indescribable sadness ―― I wonder what happened to Yu Xiong? This kind of fighting is undoubtedly worse at school and will definitely be expelled. What will his parents do to him? How does he face it? What if he doesn't study? What will Susan do to him ... doubts bombard his unbearable heart like pearls.
Lin Yuxiang felt like a mess in his heart, churning and tightening ... a sense of oppression that was out of breath rose from his heart.
Later, when I was tired of thinking, I tried my best to stand by and forget. However, the more people deliberately want to forget some things, the opposite of these things is as uninvited as gifts given by subordinates of China officials during festivals.
Thinking that ten years of hard work is about to be destroyed, a scarred heart becomes more chaotic.
"Wow" a mouthful of blood spurted from his mouth like an arrow. Then blood oozes from the nostrils.
Yu Xiang didn't respond, but was replaced by empty fatigue just now.
The faint string seems to feel caught by one hand.
24
Standing in the vast fog, Xiang looked around blankly.
However, nothing can be seen except the mist of white air transpiration. He can't see anything two meters away, and I don't know where he is, but he looks at his feet. There is only concrete as hard as iron under your feet. He looked back again, and something terrible happened ―― an inch below his feet was a bottomless cliff! He hurried forward two steps, as if attracted by a strange force. He turned and looked back, and an inch below his feet was still a bottomless cliff! It's approaching him!
This is heaven and hell! He thought to himself.
He began to run in the confused white fog and dared not look back for a long time.
After running, I feel that hundreds of millions of people are also running, surpassing or being surpassed by some people from time to time. But strangely, I can't see these people's faces clearly.
He ran to ask, but no one answered.
I don't know how long he ran, but suddenly he could see something two kilometers away from Fiona Fang. He can only see things within two kilometers, because he is in the center of an amphitheater, and the place about two kilometers in Fiona Fang is crowded with spectators.
He was surprised when someone suddenly stood around him. But I don't know anyone.
Looking around again, the people who had just formed a circle were sitting in the seats where I didn't know when I moved in, like ladders. Although they hung in the air, they didn't fall. Has been extended to the height of Wan Ren, the audience more than hundreds of millions. With him as the center, the first two kilometers of Fiona Fang are surrounded by impenetrable fences.
I don't know when he and everyone have a knife in their hands.
A man outside said, "You should have fought the wild animals, but we were merciful and let you fight each other. So, among you 1 100 million people, we will release 40 million survivors and decide who is the surviving survivor. Through your competition, the living will be the winners. "
Lin Yuxiang knows another meaning of these words: you 100 million people kill each other! After killing 60 million people, the survivors were released. He saw Spartak's deeds and thought that if everyone rushed out together, it would be unknown. He said loudly, "Let's unite and rush out."
However, his voice of shaking mountains and shaking mountains is so insignificant among the people who have already clamored for killing, and it is as thin as mosquitoes in the shadows of swords and swords.
"Stop digging your own grave ..." He shouted again. But it still sounds like a mud cow entering the sea.
Unconsciously, he also waved a knife.
A man next to him cut it off, and he immediately cut off the man's arm with one knife, and then cut off the man's neck with another knife after the man's broken arm fell. The man was cut, and his good head left his body at once.
Shouts, roars, swords and screams filled the Colosseum, which was like a ghost-infested hell on earth.
Luck is often based on misfortune, and many places are almost forced, involuntarily, and there is no middle way. Under the iron law of success or failure. Success is a history of struggle worthy of admiration; Failure is an unfortunate "tonghua record" despised by hundreds of millions of people.
Unwilling to fail, Lin Yuxiang fought with people.
There seems to be a little compulsion and necessity.
In the blink of an eye, Lin Yuxiang killed three people and then stabbed another person in the chest.
Just then, another man cut at him again, and he drew his knife, but it went deep into the man's body and could not be pulled out.
In the chaos, Lin Yuxiang's head flew away. ...
"ah!" Lin Yuxiang, who was in shock, sat up from his hospital bed and recalled his dream just now. Cold sweat rolled down his cheeks.
"Have a nightmare?" A gentle voice said, "Well, it's all my fault that I was careless and forgot to see if your hand was on my chest ..."
Lin Yuxiang was very moved. He turned to look and shuddered unexpectedly. It turns out that this person is President Qian.
Many times, words of concern are like cards given to you by a liar when he cheats Jinhua ―― he always gains more than he loses. He won't lose money. If you get a bad deck of cards directly, you won't lose too much after giving up. If he gives you a good card, you will be defeated by his better card. Because the greater the hope, the greater the disappointment.
In view of this, Lin Yuxiang carefully pondered President Qian's words for several times and didn't think it was ironic.
Isn't he going to be punished for escaping from the night?
Didn't President Qian never care about foreign affairs?
Besides, he took part in the fight again. Isn't this against the school rules?
Then why does President Qian care so much about him?
There is only one explanation, that is, President Qian felt that he had ruined him that night.
However, is the fact that simple?
"Better?" President Qian asked kindly.
Yuxiang didn't know President Qian's intention and was silent.
President Qian waited patiently for an answer.
Suddenly, Lin Yuxiang thought of something and looked up at President Qian anxiously: "What happened to Yu Xiong?"
The voice of the "dead man" is very dull and calm.
Lin Yuxiang vomited blood on the clothes that were stained with blood last time but didn't change, and then passed out.
When I woke up again, I had put on clean clothes. President Qian is still sitting beside him quietly and kindly. After he woke up, he hurriedly sent someone to call a chicken and condescended to feed it himself.
Lin Yuxiang was already hungry, because his hand was injured and he was inconvenient to move, so he didn't care so much and began to eat.
After dinner, I can't help feeling grateful to President Qian.
"Thank you"
"It should be." President Qian smiled.
"Why are you so kind to me?" Lin Yuxiang asked tentatively.
"At first glance, it is a talent and a piece of reading material."
Reading materials? Lin Yuxiang was secretly sad.
"Do you still want to study?"
"Think" Yu Xiang wanted to think, and finally hit the nail on the head.
"Really?"
"Really"
"But what did you do this time? It's really hard to say. I really want you to see it, but there are rules, and several other teachers are against it. However, there is still a chance. " This is the embodiment of smart officials-creating contradictions between what they can do and organizations, organs and regulations that will not be binding on them, and then talking about their own hardships, so that the other party can feel their own hardships and win the gratitude of others. Because only those who have experienced danger, struggle and narrow escape or narrow escape can become heroes.
Yu Xiang is not familiar with this. Looking at the hero in front of him, he is grateful.
President Qian knew that the time was ripe, so he looked around. Seeing that no one was there, he whispered, "Six people were killed and several injured in this fight. Once this story gets out, how can the school recruit students? " In addition, schools are also responsible; Therefore, this matter must be suppressed. We have given a lot of money to the families of the deceased, and they also promised to keep this secret. Now only you and Zhao Xi Harmony have not agreed ... "
"Isn't that a crime?" Yu Xiang wants to know.
"What is a crime? As long as you don't say, who knows? Don't you want to study? Don't you watch your elderly parents worry about you? What can I do if I don't study? " President Qian is trying to make ends meet.
(To be continued)
- Previous article:"Why was Li Ao banned?"
- Next article:Stop believing stupidly! What are the seven biggest rumors about gender testing?
- Related articles
- In Journey to the West, when did Zhu Bajie peek at a woman?
- What is the ancient meaning of husband?
- How to evaluate Zhang Wei's performance in variety shows such as Everyday Up?
- Why are there so many seals on celebrity calligraphy and painting?
- What do the five colors of red, yellow, blue, green and purple stand for?
- Yunmeng Shuang Jie is not a joke.
- Recommend a good book and reasons.
- Inter Milan vs Barcelona (Champions League)
- Edison's personal data
- Tell jokes to coax a boyfriend's jokes