Zhang ailing joke

Coordinates | Foshan, Guangdong

1? There is no feeling of not being riddled with holes.

When I was a student, I liked Zhang Ailing just because of her famous saying:

I want you to know that no matter when and where, there is always someone waiting for you in this world. Anyway, you know, there is always such a person.

What a beautiful sentence!

Ignite the infinite reverie in my teenage heart. I look forward to the appearance of that person, just as I look forward to poetry and distance.

I fantasized about it countless times:

Meet the person you want to meet among thousands of people. In thousands of years, in the boundless wilderness of time, it happened to catch up, neither too early nor too late.

There is nothing else to say but ask softly, "Oh, are you here, too?"

However, as 23-year-old Zhang Ailing said, there are no feelings in this world that are not riddled with holes.

It's a promise! Zhang ailing has been looking for love all her life, but throughout her life, she never really got the love she wanted.

When I finished the courses such as "Iron Triangle of Life" and "How to Cultivate Children's Self-confidence", I looked back on Zhang Ailing's life and found that many answers to her life were here.

Zhang Ailing and Her Iron Triangle of Life

Zhang Ailing has a noble pedigree.

Li Hongzhang married his daughter Li Ju to Zhang Peilun and gave birth to Zhang Zhongyan, Zhang Ailing's father.

Zhang is a young master who watched the family decline and witnessed the arrival of troubled times.

Her mother Huang Yifan was one of thousands of poor women in that era. Her parents died young and she was forced to accept an unhappy marriage.

Coupled with the disharmony of marriage and Zhang's behavior of provoking peach blossoms, Zhang Ailing left home and went abroad when she was four years old.

/kloc-at the age of 0/0, Zhang Ailing's parents agreed to divorce, and Zhang Ailing lived with her father.

When her father remarried, her stepmother treated her badly. At the instigation of her stepmother, her father severely beat Zhang Ailing and locked her in a small house.

She was infected with severe dysentery, but her father risked his life.

She finally escaped from the house and went to find her mother, who was in a poor financial situation and had a hard time living.

My mother also encouraged her to go to school, get in touch with western culture and be a lady, but it didn't take long for her mother to go to Europe with a man, leaving Zhang Ailing to fend for herself.

Stubborn Zhang Ailing had to drop out of school and began to contribute to earn a living.

Get famous before it's too late!

Influenced by her father's elegance and literary talent, Zhang Ailing laid a good literary foundation and cultivated her own literary hobbies.

Soon after, her "agarwood tablets" appeared and became famous overnight in Shanghai.

In Zhang Ailing's family, everyone has everyone's misfortune.

Zhang Yifan's misfortune also caused Zhang Ailing's misfortune to some extent. Zhang Ailing's childhood was melancholy, and the lack of maternal love made her an only child in her heart. Her father's neglect made Zhang Ailing an orphan in her heart.

How can people who have never been loved know how to love themselves and others?

The word "love" is far away and unfamiliar to everyone in Zhang Ailing and the Zhang family.

If you don't have it, you will long for it. If it's missing, I always want to make it up.

In this way, it is not difficult to understand why Zhang Ailing has been looking for and stumbling on the emotional road all her life, either "can't get it" or "has lost it".

2? The world is big, but there is no home.

In the process of cultivating self-confidence, the teacher mentioned four factors that affect self-confidence, and Zhang Ailing accounted for three.

But in the final analysis, the most fundamental and far-reaching factor comes from family background.

In that hall compound, although there is a large population, who can talk to Zhang Ailing?

Zhang Ailing's childhood growth was lonely, which also created her lonely, indifferent and arrogant personality.

She is always a loner and doesn't associate with people.

During school, she never participated in any school activities, and always sat in the most inconspicuous corner, and her silence was forgotten.

Occasionally, even if you say something, the students around you often feel that they don't understand.

And for her, many things, also don't have to talk to people.

When her father remarried, her stepmother sent a box of old clothes to Zhang Ailing as a meeting gift, which was scolded by Zhang Ailing for half a century.

Zhang Ailing wrote in "Children's Words Are Unbridled":

"There was a time when I lived under the rule of my stepmother. I will never forget the color of a crimson thin cotton gown and ground beef. I wore it endlessly, as if I had frostbite all over.

Winter has passed, and there are still frostbite scars-such hatred and shame.

More than half of it is because of shame, unhappy middle school life and few friends. "

For Zhang Ailing, the world is very big, but she has no home.

From the lack of fatherly love and maternal love to the jokes that servants prefer sons to daughters, sensitive Zhang Ailing suspects that she does not deserve love.

From the decline of the family to the old clothes worn by her stepmother, Zhang Ailing grew up in inferiority and depression.

The "disgust and shame" given to her by old clothes has plunged her into the bottom of the negative energy layer that seriously damages her mental health, and it can't be lower.

Just like when she met Hu Lancheng: seeing him, she became very low, as low as dust. ...

Let's talk about Zhang Ailing's ladder diagram of spiritual growth.

In the ladder diagram of spiritual growth, value is a very important one of the above three layers. Anyone who does anything has made a valuable choice.

So Zhang Ailing chose Hu Lancheng, who, like the doom in her life, is bound to appear and experience.

If life starts over, she may have no other choice.

When a woman who is eager to be loved meets a man who is good at using sugar-coated shells, he gives her unprecedented warmth, makes great efforts to please her, and is brilliant. No matter how lonely Zhang Ailing is, she must be irresistible.

But perhaps, Hu Lancheng really knows Zhang Ailing, her cold appearance, her inner loneliness, her every word, her every work, at least once.

A teacher once said to me:

A talented woman's heart is doomed to be lonely, and her pursuit of the other half is not only material and spiritual, but also spiritual.

However, it is difficult to find a person who can resonate with her heart, and it is precisely this spiritual need that will outweigh everything.

Zhang Ailing found her soul mate. Lucky? Or misfortune?

It is not easy to find a heart in the long years.

Zhang Ailing wrote on the marriage certificate: May the years be quiet and the world be stable.

These nine words contain all Zhang Ailing's expectations for the future, hoping to win a person's heart and never give up.

On the contrary, the romantic Hu seduced the nurse first, and then hooked up with the widow Fan Xiumei. Zhang Ailing came to Wenzhou all the way, only to see Hu Lancheng with others.

The man who once praised her as the goddess of literature and art in the Republic of China once regarded her as a shoe.

Zhang Ailing also ended her tortured and heartbreaking love by saying "I will fade away slowly".

This relationship made her creative heyday, which made Zhang Ailing love her soul out of body and poor in spirit.

three

Buddha Sakyamuni said: No matter who you meet, he is the one who should appear in your life. It is no accident that he will teach you something.

But what did Hu Lancheng teach Zhang Ailing?

Many people feel sorry for her marriage with Yala. Zhang Ailing, a 29-year-old American third-rate writer, is heavily in debt and still suffering from illness. What can he give Zhang Ailing?

I think that's-stable love.

This is the only thing Yala can give to Zhang Ailing. Although Zhang Ailing also knows that this love will leave at any time with Yala's old age and illness, it is enough to live and love.

In Zhang Ailing's life, there is also a very important figure: Sang Arc.

This is a love affair that Zhang Ailing has never admitted personally. It was not until her little reunion was published that everyone knew that they had loved each other deeply.

Although Hu Lancheng left Zhang Ailing's life, she left a lot of political problems for Zhang Ailing, which made her once down and out and fell into a very bad life predicament, which also had a considerable impact on her writing career.

It was the appearance of mulberry arc that saved Zhang Ailing, dragged her out of the mire, and comforted Zhang Ailing's inner pain.

Zhang Ailing borrowed Jiuli's feelings for Yanshan, saying that she was his first love.

She likes mulberry arcs, and she is too careful to ask for anything. Her inner pride does not allow any reluctance.

She no longer expects so-called long-term stability. All she wants to be with Hu Sang is an experience and warmth.

Talent didn't save Zhang Ailing's confidence, and she didn't face this relationship bravely in the end. Faced with such a talented woman, the introverted Sanghu did not dare to have any extravagant hopes.

This is a doomed relationship, and her future with him has finally come to nothing.

Zhang ailing chose to go to the United States alone, in exchange for the rest of her life in seclusion.

There are always many regrets in life, either meeting the wrong person at the right time or meeting the right person at the wrong time.

I often wonder, if Sang Arc appeared in front of Hu Lancheng, would the outcome be different?

But there are no ifs in life, only results and consequences.

Environment creates character, and character determines fate.

The absence of Zhang Ailing's life triangle makes her long for a beautiful love, which can give her warmth in adulthood.

It is this desire that makes her forget that Hu Lancheng is a veritable "love rat", makes her miss the lemonade-like "first love", and makes her ignore that Yala is a "poor household" who can't even give her a stable life.

Adler once said: lucky people are cured by childhood all their lives, and unfortunate people are cured by childhood all their lives.

Zhang Ailing was trapped in family of origin's Curse all her life. What she lost in her childhood, she searched all her life in the vast sea of people, and finally found nothing.

For Zhang Ailing, who is gifted, it is a complete misfortune that "The Pain of the Native" was finally transformed into an immortal work and spread all over the world.

For most of us ordinary people, if a family is full of holes, it will be a disaster in life. It is very likely that you will not get the happiness of your family and run your own business.

I only hope that there will be more loving parents and fewer unfortunate children in the world.

Our children may not become talented and successful people, but as long as we give them enough love and childhood warmth, they can still live a happy life with ordinary efforts.

And this happiness is the regret that countless talented people yearn for all their lives.

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