Joke Collection Website - Cold jokes - What did a bear get?

What did a bear get?

(Source: media8) 1. There is a strong lock hanging on the gate, and an iron bar has made great efforts, but it still cannot be pried open. The key came and his thin body got into the lock hole. With a slight turn, the big lock opened with a bang.

Everyone's heart is like a locked door, no matter how thick the iron bar is, it can't be pried open. Only by caring can we turn ourselves into a delicate key and enter other people's hearts.

Second, the father and son saw a very luxurious imported car. The son disdainfully said to his father, "People who ride in this kind of car must have no knowledge in their stomachs!" "The father replied airily," People who say such things must have no money in their pockets! "

Does your view of things also reflect your true attitude?

After dinner, mother and daughter wash dishes together, and father and son watch TV in the living room. Suddenly, there was a sound of breaking dishes in the kitchen, and then there was silence. The son looked at his father and said, "Mom must have broken it." "How do you know?" "She didn't swear."

We are so used to treating people and ourselves with different standards that we are often strict with ourselves.

Four, there are two Taiwan Province tour groups to travel to the Japanese Izu Peninsula. The road conditions are poor, and there are potholes everywhere. A tour guide repeatedly said that the road was like pockmarked. Another tour guide said poetically to the tourists, "We are now taking the famous Izu charming dimple avenue."

Although it is the same situation, different ideas will produce different attitudes. How beautiful your thoughts are and how you think about them are up to you.

Fifth, students who are also in the third grade of primary school, their future wish is to be clowns. Teacher China denounced it as: "Without ambition, you can't teach a boy!" The foreign church said, "May you bring laughter to the whole world!" " As elders, we require not only encouragement, but also a narrow definition of success.

My wife is cooking in the kitchen. Her husband kept nagging: "Slow down and be careful!" The fire is too big. Turn the fish over quickly, there is too much oil! The wife blurted out, "I know how to cook. The husband calmly replied, "I just want you to know how I feel when you are talking while I am driving." ..."

It is not difficult to learn to be considerate of others, as long as you are willing to seriously look at the problem from the other side's point of view and position.

7. A bus full of passengers was driving fast down the hill, and a man was chasing after it. A passenger stuck his head out of the window and said to the car chaser, "Dude! Forget it, you can't catch up! " "I must catch up with it," the man panted. "I am the driver of this car!"

Some people must work very hard, because otherwise, the consequences will be very tragic! However, it is precisely because we must go all out that the potential instinct and unknown characteristics will finally be fully displayed.

8. A: "The new neighbor is so hateful. He came in the middle of the night last night and tried to ring my doorbell." B: "How hateful! Did you call the police immediately? " Answer: "No, I think they are crazy. Keep playing my trumpet."

Everything happens for a reason. If you can see your mistakes first, the answer will be different.

Zhang San is driving on a mountain road. Just as he was enjoying the beautiful scenery leisurely, the oncoming truck driver suddenly rolled down the window and shouted, "Pig!" " Zhang Sanyue gets angrier and angrier. He also rolled down the window and cursed: "You are the pig!" Just after scolding, I bumped into a group of pigs crossing the road.

Don't misinterpret the kindness of others, it will only hurt yourself and humiliate others.

10. The little boy asked his father, "Does the father always know more than his son?" Dad replied, "Of course!" "Who invented the electric light?" "Edison." "Then why didn't Edison's father invent the electric light?"

Authority is often just an empty shell that can't stand the test, especially in today's pluralistic and open era. (Source: Google)

Xiaoming accidentally swallowed a small piece of soap while taking a bath. His mother called the family doctor for help in a panic. The doctor said, "I still have a few patients here." It may take half an hour to get there. " Xiaoming's mother said, "What should I do before you come?" The doctor said, "Give Xiaoming a cup of boiled water, and then jump hard, so that Xiaoming can blow bubbles with his mouth to kill time."

Now that it has happened, why not face it frankly? It's better to rest assured if you are worried, and it's better to be poor and happy if you are nervous.

Share this article quickly and let more people see it! Understand the truth of life from laughter and reflect on your life!

Original source: media8