What about children who are often scolded by their parents?

As we all know, in family education, if parents criticize children blindly, then children may become unconfident. Doing so will not only leave the shadow of childhood trauma, but also affect his character building. What if I am often attacked and denied by my parents? This article tells you: How to adjust your mentality when you are scolded by your parents?

Often attacked and denied by parents, how to adjust the mentality when scolded by parents?

1, take appropriate psychological defense.

Some people, especially adolescent students, may be tempted to talk back after being scolded by their parents, but you will find that this will only make the parent-child relationship worse and deepen the parent-child contradiction.

Others may be naturally introverted and sensitive. After being scolded by their parents, they may keep silent and bear these negative pressures and emotions alone.

Psychological defense mechanism is a kind of psychological protection coping style when people face difficult situations and setbacks. However, the above two coping styles are not particularly suitable.

There are two constructive defense mechanisms in the face of parents' scolding. The first is identification, which is the main development task of teenagers. For example, if parents criticize our shortcomings, then we will agree with them and accept our own shortcomings.

The second is sublimation. We turn the negative emotions after being scolded into positive actions, which is often said as "turning grief into strength", which is conducive to the healthy development of body and mind.

2. Correct emotional adjustment methods

If you are often attacked and denied by your parents and often scolded by your parents, then you will definitely have emotional problems, such as easy anxiety and tension, or easy depression and sadness. To solve this problem, we must first know that these are normal emotional changes.

Then we can use rational emotional therapy to relieve our negative emotions. This method holds that the key to arouse people's emotions is not a specific event, but people's unreasonable and incorrect cognition of it.

To put it simply, if we feel worthless or hate our parents after being scolded by them, it is an unreasonable and incorrect cognition. Unreasonable cognition can be summarized into three types: absolute requirement, excessive generalization and extremely bad.

What we need to do is to turn these unreasonable cognition into reasonable cognition, for example, seriously reflect on whether we have any problems mentioned by our parents, and if so, change and encourage them. This is the correct and reasonable way to adjust our emotions.

3. Avoid the tendency of emotional abuse

Being scolded by parents, often attacked and denied by parents, can be regarded as an emotional abuse of parents to their children. Because children will imitate their parents' behavior through observation and learning, you are likely to learn to treat others with emotional abuse if you are abused by your parents.

In order to avoid repeating the same mistakes, you need to remind yourself to avoid the tendency of emotional abuse. This requires you to find out what your parents did before they abused you emotionally. For example, before they criticize you, mom and dad always look gloomy and angry.

If you can find this information in time, then you can avoid the emotional abuse of your parents and reduce your emotional abuse tendency. Let your emotions be more stable and avoid interpersonal problems and your future parent-child relationship problems.

In short, children who are often attacked and denied by their parents are miserable. They have experienced a dark childhood and should know how to adjust their mentality after being scolded by their parents. Only in this way can they repair their childhood wounds, grow from them and become better themselves.