How to describe baldness humorously

The humorous description of baldness is as follows:

1. Light heads are piled on hundreds of heads like grass. From a distance, they look like a white casserole.

His hair is very long and thick, splashing upward like a black torrent and hanging in the air like a waterfall.

His short hair, half an inch long, is as dry and hard as reed grass in autumn and has no oil at all.