The script of Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, a funny version, the funnier the better

Characters: Queen, Magic Mirror, Snow White, Three Dwarfs, Prince.

A narrator

Scene 1

Narrator: A long time ago, there was a beautiful queen, but behind her beauty there was a jealous heart. She couldn't bear to hear that someone was prettier than her. She has a magic mirror and often walks in front of it to admire herself.

(Queen, Magic Mirror, Part 1)

Queen: Mirror, Mirror, tell me who is the most handsome guy in the world?

Mirror: Sorry, there is a system failure. , please re-enter the voice prompt.

Queen: Forget it, tell Ai Jia who is the most beautiful woman in the world.

Magic Mirror: OK, restart. Everyone comes to see, this person is really beautiful! She has long black hair like a waterfall, snow-white skin, and a slim figure. Every man will fall in love with her and every woman will feel inferior to her. She is Snow White.

Queen: Where did you get so much nonsense from this broken mirror?

Magic Mirror: My child, please don’t be upset. Every girl is an angel who has descended into the mortal world. Some have their feet on the ground, and some have their heads on the ground. Unfortunately for you, It just so happens that your face falls on a piece of granite. This is fate that no one can change.

Queen: If you hadn’t seen that you were a global limited edition, I would have smashed you!

Magic Mirror: Huh? You've said it many times.

Queen: I don’t believe that a queen like me is worse than a princess? !

Magic Mirror: I think external beauty is secondary, and spiritual beauty is important. But if you really want to become beautiful, the only way to do it is to go to a beauty salon.

Queen: Could it be the long-lost one...

Magic Mirror: (Taking the Queen's words) Yes, it's the long-lost one - give it back to me Piao Piao fist!

(Actors A and B, please give me a good performance)

If you do this for seven or forty-nine days, you can become as beautiful as him. (Pointing to Actor B, Exit A and B)

Queen: I can't wait any longer. I want Snow White not to see the sun tomorrow. Go and kill her.

Magic Mirror: Although your idea is very creative, I am a magic mirror, not a devil.

Queen: You are the devil. I told the canteen that I will give you a packed lunch at noon tomorrow.

Magic Mirror: Hey...braised pork.

Queen: Two more chicken butts. go.

Scene 2

(Scene: A brick is placed in the middle of the stage, Actor A plays an old woman and walks slowly over. She stumbles and falls to the ground. Snow White comes from behind Go up and help the old woman up)

Narration: The magic mirror is right. Snow White is a lively and lovely girl. She is kind-hearted and often helps others. She regards caring for others as her own happiness.

Snow White: (to the old woman) Grandma, be careful.

Old woman: Girl, thank you. May I have your name?

Snow White: My name is Snow White. Let me help you over.

Old woman: OK, OK. You are really a beautiful and kind girl.

(Walking to the edge of the stage, under the old woman, Snow White is standing, thoughtfully. On the magic mirror)

Magic mirror: (behind Snow White) Snow White Princess?

Snow White: Oh, wait, let me move the bricks away, or more people will trip.

(Walked back and took the brick off the stage, and turned back to talk to the magic mirror)

Sir, is there anything I can do for you?

Magic Mirror: (I didn’t know how to answer for a while when I was asked. I thought about it and said hurriedly) I just finished eating and passed by with nothing to do. Can you accompany me for a walk in the woods over there?

Snow White: Okay. (Walking slowly with the magic mirror)

Narration: Snow White was tricked into the forest, and the magic mirror revealed his true face.

Magic Mirror: (Looking at Snow White, grinning sinisterly) Haha...Snow White, haha...

Snow White: (Looking very scared, Hands on chest) You, what do you want to do?

Magic Mirror: I am the big devil, and I will kill you today.

(As the background music plays, the magic mirror reaches out its hands to invade Snow White.

)

Snow White: (very scared, step back. The music suddenly changes to Sailor Moon, and Snow White performs a transformation) The light of the moon attacks, (the magic mirror dodges) attacks (the magic mirror dodges again) ) The brightness of the moon, thi! (The magic mirror retreats, defeated. Exit the magic mirror and Snow White)

Narration: Over there, the queen is still waiting for news about the magic mirror.

(Enter the Queen, hold the mirror and look at it as you walk. On the Magic Mirror)

Magic Mirror: (Behind the Queen) The Emperor...The Emperor...The Queen... (Appearing to be injured)

Queen: (pointing to the magic mirror sternly) Why did you come back? !

Magic Mirror: I...she...I...

Queen: What? (Slaps the magic mirror) Go to hell! (Under the magic mirror) It seems that I have to take action myself. Assuming that he can run out of the classroom but not out of the school, (laughing in a high-pitched voice) Hahahaha... (Exit the Queen)

Scene 3

Scene: A small room House (replaced by a stool)

Narration: There were three cute dwarfs living in the forest. One day they met the lost Snow White.

(The music "Swan Lake" starts, three dwarfs line up to dance on the Swan Lake, "Swan Lake" stops)

Three dwarfs: (singing "Thirty-Six Strategies for Love" in unison) 》) Who said that handsome boys have no brains and only know how to love beauty and sleep. (Let’s pose POSS together with our backs to the audience) Yeah!

Dwarf A: It’s the opposite.

Three dwarves: (posing POSS to the audience) Yeah! (The music of "Swan Lake" starts, and the three dwarfs dance "Swan Lake" and retreat to the back of the house and squat down. Snow White enters)

Snow White: (pointing to the house) Could someone live here? (Asking loudly) Is anyone there?

Dwarf A: Who are you? Which army are you from?

Snow White: I am Snow White, from the Red Fourth Army. (Three dwarves run up to Snow White)

Dwarf A: (pointing to Snow White) Really?

Snow White: Really, if you don’t believe it, try it!

Dwarf B: Check. (Snow White stood still, and the three dwarves walked around her and sang)

Dwarf A: (Exciting 2005) You will never understand the sadness of paying for you.

Snow White: It feels so sweet and I am so attached.

Dwarf B: I believe that day is worth eternity.

Snow White: It’s just that they are not simple enough.

Dwarf C: Holding hands, one step, two steps, three steps, four steps, looking at the sky.

Snow White: But you use others in your arms.

Dwarf A: No matter how romantic or bizarre the plot is.

Snow White: My love has meaning.

Qi: The only thing I love is you. (Showing POSS to the audience with their backs together) Yeah!

Dwarf A: It’s the other way around. (all pose POSS to the audience) Yeah!

Dwarf B: The king of heaven covers the tiger of earth.

Snow White: The pagoda suppresses the river monster.

Dwarf C: Why is your face red?

Snow White: radiant.

Dwarf A: Why is it yellow again?

Snow White: Wax to protect against cold.

Three dwarves: (looking at each other and saying) That’s right, that’s right.

Snow White: (holding the dwarf’s hand and jumping up and down) I finally found you!

Dwarf A: Are all comrades safe?

Snow White: Well, safe and sound. Comrades miss you very much. I'm lost here.

Dwarf C: It’s okay, come to our house. (The dwarves and Snow White exit together)

Scene 4

Scene: A small house. Snow White walked slowly in front of the house.

Narration: On this day, the three dwarves went out, and Snow White was the only one left at home. The evil queen finally found Snow White. She carefully crafted a poisonous apple to poison Snow White. (Queen enters)

Queen: (looking around with a magnifying glass, suddenly saw Snow White and was shocked) Ah! Miss, do you want to lose weight?

Snow White: Thank you, I don’t want it. I'm already very thin.

Queen: There is a saying that goes well, good figure, just wait and see. Take two steps. If you are not fat, take two steps.

Snow White: Just take two steps.

(Background music "I Love Taiwanese Girls" starts, Snow White walks on the catwalk, the music stops)

Queen: (Takes out an apple to Snow White) Girl, I admire you so much . This apple is so cute, I’ll give it to you as a gift.

Snow White: Oh, thank you. (Take the apple and take a bite)

Queen: (showing a sly smile) Haha. ． ． This is the most amazing poison in the world that I have exclusively developed, and I will kill you in one day!

Snow White: Hahaha! The world's most strange poison should be the one who is half-stepping with a smile on the face of the Bai family.

Queen: Our One Day Death Powder is made from seven different kinds of poisonous insects, plus the crane crown red, which is refined for seventy-seven forty-nine days. It is colorless and odorless, killing people without a trace.

Snow White: Humph, our Smiling Banbu Dian is made from honey, Sichuan scallops, Platycodon grandiflorum and Tiansan Snow Lotus. It does not require refrigeration and does not contain any preservatives. In addition to being highly toxic, the taste is also Very tasty.

Queen: Anyone who eats our One Day Death Powder will lose all martial arts within a day, have venous reflux, have random thoughts, become possessed, and eventually die of burst blood vessels.

Snow White: That’s right, and as the name suggests, the person who eats our smiling half-step must not walk half-step or smile, otherwise his whole body will explode and die.

Together: It’s really a home trip. If you want to kill people and silence them, you need good medicine.

Narrator: So, where can I buy it?

Snow White: This brother is so lucky, I happen to have one here. (Toxic attack, slowly falling down)

Queen: Hahaha. ． ． (Exit the Queen)

Narration: The three dwarfs returned home and were very anxious to see Snow White unconscious. At this time, the legendary prince appears, and the story of love at first sight is about to take place. (Enter three dwarfs)

Dwarf A: Snow White, what’s wrong with you? Why are you frothing?

Dwarf B and C: Snow White, Snow White...

Dwarf C: Hurry, get to the hospital quickly. (The dwarves lifted Snow White together, but they couldn’t lift it)

Dwarf A: This is heavier than a pig!

Dwarf B: What should I do?

(The lights go out, a beam of light shines on the prince, he slowly walks onto the stage, sings "Cinderella", the lights turn on after singing)

Dwarf C: (sees the prince, waves, shouts ) Hello, young man. ． ． Hello. ． ． Come and help.

Prince: (seeing the dwarf coming over and seeing Snow White) This girl is growing up so well. ． ．

Dwarf A: Beautiful, beautiful.

Dwarf B: Come on, come on, Snow White is dying.

Prince: (Trying hard to pick up Snow White, but couldn’t hold her twice. He held up Snow White’s head with his hands.

Suddenly, Snow White coughed. Woke up twice)

Qi: (yelling in fear) Ah! ． ． ．

Prince: (runs away in fear) It’s a fake corpse! ． ． ．

Snow White: (rubbing her eyes) Which hero saved me? Which hero saved me? (The dwarves pointed to the prince, Snow White walked over and hugged the prince’s arm)

Dwarf A: What a disaster!

Dwarf B: What bad luck!

Dwarf C: I regret it!

Prince: The compensation is big this time! Forget it, you helped me find the princess, and I will grant each of you a wish.

Dwarf A: Really? Then I'll go first. I actually don’t want anything else, I just want a lot of money!

Prince: OK! (Take out a key from his pocket and give it to Dwarf A) Key to the vault.

Dwarf A: Ah, ah, I have money! I have money!

Dwarf B: (Impatiently) It’s my turn. It’s my turn. I’ve always wanted a mobile phone. I used to want a flip phone. Hey, hey, it’s fashionable and beautiful. Later I wanted a straight one, hey, hey, simple and elegant. Now I want a slider. Hey, hey, Snow White. ． ．

Snow White: (as if calling) Prince Charming.

Prince: OK! (Take out the mobile phone from your pocket) Here, Nokia N93, (to put it compactly) has passed the ISO9002 national certification system and has the GPRS global satellite positioning system. As long as you go out and shout! The whole world can hear it.

Dwarf B: Ah, I finally have a mobile phone.

Prince: (pointing to dwarf C) It’s your turn.

Dwarf C: Ah, is it my turn? (Make a prayer posture) Then I hope there will be peace in the world.

Prince: Well...well...do you have any other questions?

Dwarf C: Oh, this is a bit difficult. That. ． ． Then let me become more handsome!

Prince: It’s the same question as before.

Dwarves A and B: World peace? So stylish? !

Qi: (kicks dwarf C) Damn it!

Prince: Ignore him, (to Snow White) Then give this wish to you, Snow White.

Snow White: Me? Then I hope the queen can become more beautiful.

Qi: Why?

Snow White: (facing the audience) Although she wants to harm me, I still hope that my mother can be happy. Don't take external beauty too seriously. In fact, true beauty is hidden in everyone's heart. Each of us is beautiful. As long as you give more of your love to others and let others feel your love, then you will be the most beautiful person!

Prince: You are right, external beauty is secondary, spiritual beauty is important. I now know that I have found the most beautiful person in the world. (The prince held the princess's hand, and the three dwarfs applauded)

Narration: The prince and Snow White lived happily ever after.

End of the play