Collect short jokes for mobile phones

1. Police: Why didn’t you call for help when you were robbed? Victim: That would be worse. Police: How come? Victim: If I open my mouth to cry for help, my four gold teeth will be exposed!

2. Dad: I heard that you are learning antonyms, so what is the antonym of "good"? Son: Not good. Dad: Where's "black"? Son: Not bad. Dad: Damn it! Son: No bastard!

3. A missing object notice is posted at the school door: I am sleeping in the spring before dawn, and the wind blows my clothes and runs away. If someone finds it, the reward will be indispensable.

The next day, someone added, "How much is it?"

4. When the teacher was marking the paper, he found a student explaining the word like this: Years and months - too long The moon is exhausted. The teacher frowned, and another one said: The Chinese New Year has been taking so long, even the moon is tired!

5. A farmer suffered from frequent urination! Urgency to urinate! Pain during urination! When I arrived at the hospital, the doctor prescribed a laboratory test sheet that said "urine test." The doctor's handwriting is very sloppy! The farmer looked at it for a long time without recognizing it! I thought: Could it be that the doctor told me to "check my fart"?

6. A rich man hired the best architect to build his tomb. Three years later, the rich man asked the architect: "Are all the projects finished?" "Almost." "How much more is left?" "The only thing missing is you."

7. Consumption is too expensive, life is Too tired, drinking is harmful to the liver, eating cigarettes is harmful to the lungs, I am tired from work and study, and even the public toilets are charged. The days are really getting worse and worse. I would like to ask Xiaozhu if you are still snoozing?

8. A couple celebrated their 20th wedding anniversary. The wife proposed to kill a chicken to celebrate. The husband said coldly: "Why put the mistakes of 20 years ago on the head of a chicken."

9.A: "Did you know? After research, scientists have found that a person's appearance is related to his IQ is inversely proportional." B: "Oh, really? No wonder you are so smart!"

10. The beautiful tour guide led the team to visit the army camp, and the soldier fired a gun. He walked into the arms of the accompanying company commander, blushing and saying that he was frightened by the gunfire. Company Commander: It's okay. Would you like to watch us practice cannon, Miss?