What jokes can make girls laugh?

1, campus joke: The teacher asked a student: How did your exercise book become like this?

Student: It fell into the water.

Teacher: How did it fall into the water?

He lowered his head and said, I was careless when I went to the toilet. ...

The teacher looked pale and asked, did you ... fall into the water in the toilet? !

The student said: I fell into the urinal. ...

I saw that the teacher screamed at the sky with a pair of tearful eyes for 5 seconds, and then stretched out his index finger and gesticulated, saying, I have been turning pages with saliva!

2, hilarious joke: Q: "Going on a blind date, the opposite woman grinned and a thick piece of powder fell on her face. What should I do?" A: "It's very kind of you to send food at the first meeting!"

Q: "What would you do if you were on a bus and someone around you suddenly looked at you and vomited?" A: "Sure enough! Most people saw me pass out directly! "

Q: "What would you do if you went down with ten bottles of beer?" Answer: "Let them come up again ..."

3, folk joke: A: "I heard that you have been buying lottery tickets recently? How's it going? Did you win? "

B: "We don't have to squeeze buses this month."

A: "Did you win the lottery? Buy a car? "

B: "Win a fart, buy a fart! All the money is spent on lottery tickets, so I can only walk to work this month! "

A: "..."

4, hilarious anecdote: playing snooker with a foreigner, being abused is not good, foreigners always praise me for a NB, I am embarrassed to say it. When I got home, I didn't think his expression at that time was like a compliment, so I looked it up online. I went there and had a long experience: it turned out that he was talking about a novice, just like NB! The important thing is that when he said this word, I kept answering "thank you!" " Thank you! "Ah, the soul is fragile. This is embarrassing. ...

5. Campus joke: Teacher A is correcting an English composition and suddenly goes into a rage: "I have never seen such a wonderful English composition!" "

Teacher B asked, "What is it written?"

Teacher A: "Write a story about the king and queen."

Teacher B: "That should be good!"

Teacher A said angrily, "Bullshit! The boy actually wrote at the beginning that the king asked the queen,' Can you speak Chinese?' Then the queen answered' Yes', and then all the damn things are in Chinese! "

6. Five wonders in math textbooks: fifth place: model train driver who drives at a constant speed and is never late;

Fourth place: a contractor with clear division of labor, tacit cooperation and conscientious work;

Third place: crazy swimming pool manager who pours water at the same time;

Second place: abnormal old farmer who keeps hens and rabbits in cages;

First place: Xiao Ming, who went out early but deliberately slowed down and waited for his brother to catch up!

7. Campus joke: Xiaoming is playing basketball on the playground today. A classmate takes off his clothes when he is hot. Xiao Ming saw that he had six abdominal muscles and asked his classmates enviously, "How did you practice your abdominal muscles?" He said calmly, "Constipation since childhood ..."

8. Folk joke: A friend and a kind heart are always guilty. Once he couldn't sleep in the middle of the night, so he played with a drift bottle and got a voice. The other party is a sister paper. It is so boring. Who can tell me a joke? My friend was kind, too, and hesitated for a long time. I felt that my sister's paper could not be chilling, so I said, you are so beautiful ... As a result, they scolded me all night. ...

9. Campus joke: In class today, the old class divided the whole class into six groups and asked everyone to give their groups a name, so all kinds of wonderful group names appeared: insatiable group, slippery group, Tathagata group, special agent group No.5, and serious crime group No.6, but what really angered me was that there was a group called Guangzong Yaozu group!

10, a famous joke: the Monkey King was taken to the royal horse supervisor by Taibai Venus: "Bi Marvin, these horses will please you later."

The Monkey King looked at a sea of clouds and shouted, "Wait a minute! Where is the horse? "

Taibai Venus: "Look carefully, isn't that all?"

The Monkey King wondered, "I only see a bunch of floating clouds!"

Venus Taibai: "Yes, everything is a cloud." ...