100 points are used to collect jokes.

The little white rabbit skipped to the bakery and asked, "Boss, do you have a hundred buns?"

Boss: "Oh, sorry, not that much."

"well. . . "The little white rabbit left in dismay.

The next day, the little white rabbit skipped to the bakery. "Boss, do you have a hundred steamed buns?"

Boss: "Sorry, there is still no"

"well. . . "The little white rabbit left in dismay again.

On the third day, the little white rabbit skipped to the bakery. "Boss, do you have a hundred steamed buns?"

The boss said happily, "Yes, yes, we have a hundred buns today! ! "

The little white rabbit took out the money: "Great, I'll buy two!" " "

There is a little white rabbit running happily in the forest. On the way, it met a giraffe who was rolling marijuana. The white rabbit said to the giraffe, "giraffe, giraffe, why do you want to do something that hurts yourself?" Look at how beautiful this forest is. Let's run in nature together! "

The giraffe looked at the marijuana and the white rabbit, threw the marijuana behind her and ran with the white rabbit in the forest.

Later, they met an elephant who was about to take cocaine.

The white rabbit said to the elephant, "elephant, elephant, why do you want to do something that hurts yourself?" Look at how beautiful this forest is. Let's run in nature together! "

The elephant looked at the cocaine and the white rabbit, threw the cocaine behind him and ran in the forest with the white rabbit and giraffe.

Later, they met a lion who was about to kill a poisonous snake.

The white rabbit said to the lion, "Lion, lion, why did you do something that hurt yourself?"

Look at how beautiful this forest is. Let's run in nature together! "

The lion looked at the syringe and the white rabbit and threw the syringe behind him.

Rushed over and gave the white rabbit a good beating.

The elephant and giraffe trembled with fear: "why did you hit the white rabbit?" It is so kind, cares about our health and lets us get close to nature. "

The lion said angrily, "This bastard rabbit drags me around the forest like an idiot every time he eats ecstasy."

3. On the first day, the little white rabbit went fishing by the river and went home without catching anything.

The next day, the little white rabbit went fishing by the river again, but found nothing and went home.

On the third day, the little white rabbit just arrived at the river, and a big fish jumped out of the river and shouted at the little white rabbit:

If you use carrots as fucking bait again, I'll kill you!

In order to test the police forces of the United States, Hongkong and Chinese mainland, the United Nations put three rabbits in three forests.

Let's see who finds the rabbit in three places first, police.

Before the first forest, it was the American police. They first spent a whole half-day meeting to make a battle plan and strictly divide the work, and then

Special forces were sent to the forest for a carpet search, and the meeting was postponed. The rabbit ran away and the mission failed!

Then it's the turn of the Hong Kong police. They sent 100 people and dozens of police cars to line up outside the forest for the leaders to use.

The loudspeaker shouted: "Rabbit, rabbit, you are surrounded, come out and surrender ..." Half a day passed, but nothing happened. Flying Tigers went into the forest to search again, but the mission failed!

Finally, there are only four policemen in China. First, they played mahjong all day. At dusk, a man walked into the forest with a baton. It didn't take five minutes.

Hearing the screams of the animals in the forest, the police in China were smoking, talking and laughing and dragging behind.

Seeing a black and blue bear, the bear was dying and said, "Stop fighting, I'm a rabbit ..."

5. The little white rabbit was walking in the forest. When he met the wolf, he came up and gave the little white rabbit two big ear stickers.

Say, I told you not to wear a hat. The little white rabbit left very grievance.

The next day, she skipped out of the house wearing a hat and met the wolf again. He came up and handed it to Xiao.

The white rabbit has two big mouths and says, "I want you to wear a hat."

Tutu is depressed. After thinking for a long time, I finally decided to complain to the king of the forest, Tiger.

After explaining the situation, the tiger said, "OK, I see. I will handle this matter, so trust the organization." The same day

The tiger found his partner, the wolf. "It is wrong for you to do so. It is very difficult for me. " Wipe while talking

Wipe the dust off the table: "Do you think this is ok?" You can say, Tutu, come and find me a piece of meat!

She found the fat one, and you said you wanted the thin one. She found a thin one, and you said you wanted a fat one. So you can hit her. while

Of course, you can also say that. Tutu, come and find me a woman. She found plump ones, and you said you liked slim ones.

. She found a slim one, and you said you liked the plump one. You can beat her. It is both reasonable and powerful. "The Wolf nodded frequently.

Clap your hands and applaud, and the reverence for the tiger once again rushes to a new peak. Unexpectedly, the above instructions were given to the tiger outside the window.

The little white rabbit mowing the grass heard it. I hate this in my heart.

The next day, the little white rabbit went out again. What a coincidence! It's the big bad wolf coming. The wolf said, "Tutu, pass."

Come on, find me a piece of meat. "Tu Tu said," So, do you want to be fat or thin? "Listen, Wolf,

Heart sank, it is a joy, the heart says it's good to have a plan B, he added, "Tutu, Mary, find me a woman.

"Tu Tu asked," So, do you like plump or slim? " The wolf was silent for 2 seconds and raised his hand again.

I gave Tutu two big ear posts. "Shit, I told you not to wear a hat."

6. Bears and rabbits shit in the forest. After that, the bear asked the rabbit, "Have you lost your hair?" The rabbit said, "Don't drop it ~"

So the bear picked up the rabbit and wiped his ass.

7. A rabbit molested a wolf (this rabbit is very strong).

Then he ran away and the wolf chased him angrily.

The rabbit will catch up with the wolf when it sees it.

He sat under a tree,

Put on sunglasses and read the newspaper.

Pretend nothing happened,

Then the wolf came and saw the rabbit sitting under the tree.

Q: "Did you see a rabbit running past!"

The rabbit replied, "Did the rabbit tease the wolf?"

The wolf shouted, "No way! It's in the newspaper so soon! ! ! "

8. One day, a white rabbit came to a shop and asked the boss, "Boss, do you have any carrots?"

The boss shook his head: "No."

The little white rabbit ran away with a whoosh.

The next day, the little white rabbit came to the shop again and asked, "Boss, do you have any carrots?"

The boss shook his head angrily: "No."

The little white rabbit ran away with a whoosh.

On the third day, the white rabbit came to the shop again and asked, "Boss, do you have any carrots?"

The boss shouted angrily, "No, no! Ask me again and I'll pull out your tooth with pliers! "

The little white rabbit ran away with a whoosh.

The fourth day, the little white rabbit came to this shop again and asked timidly, "Boss, do you have pliers?"

The boss said, "No."

The little black rabbit then asked, "Do you have any carrots?"

The boss got angry, grabbed the little black rabbit, took out a small hammer and knocked out the little black rabbit's teeth.

The fourth day, the little black rabbit came to the store again and asked vaguely, "Boss, do you have carrot juice?"

9. The giraffe said, "Little Rabbit, I hope you know how good it is to have a long neck. No matter what tastes good,

When I eat it, it will slowly pass through my long neck. That kind of delicious food can be enjoyed for a long time. "

The rabbit looked at him blankly.

"Also, in summer, rabbits, cold water slowly flows through my long neck, which is delicious. Having a long neck is really

Great! Rabbit, can you imagine? "

The rabbit said slowly, "Have you ever vomited?"

10 One day, a kangaroo was driving on a country road and suddenly saw a white rabbit in the middle of the road, with almost all ears and body intact.

Lying on the ground as if listening to something. ...

So .. Kangaroo stopped the car and asked curiously, "What are you listening to, Little White Rabbit?"

"A big truck passed here half an hour ago ..."

"Wow .. so God! .. how do you know? .."

"He XX! That's how my neck and legs are broken .. "

1 1. One day, the rabbit was writing in front of a cave, and a wolf came up and asked, "Rabbit, what are you writing?"

The rabbit replied, "I'm writing a paper."

The wolf asked again, "What topic?"

The rabbit replied, "I'm writing about how rabbits eat wolves."

The wolf laughed and said he didn't believe it.

The rabbit said, "Come with me." Then he took it into the cave and the rabbit continued to write in front of the cave. also

A fox came over and asked, "Rabbit, what are you writing?"

The rabbit replied, "I'm writing a paper."

The fox asked, "What topic?"

The rabbit replied, "How does the rabbit eat the fox?"

The fox laughed after hearing this, expressing disbelief.

The rabbit said, "Come with me." Then he took it into the cave. After a while, the rabbit walked out of the mountain alone.

Kong, continue to write its paper.

At this time, in the cave, a lion was sitting on a pile of bones and picking his teeth, while reading the rabbit's paper: a trick

The ability of a thing depends not on its strength, but on who is its boss behind the scenes!

12, in a mental hospital, one day the dean wanted to see how three mental patients recovered, so he took care of each of them.

There is a white rabbit in front of him. The first mental patient sat on the white rabbit, covering its ears and mouth.

The dean shook his head when he shouted "drive" in the room; The second man turned his back on the white rabbit, patted its ass and said, "Come on!" "

I chase ",the dean sighed; The third crouched there, touching the white rabbit assiduously. After reading it, the dean was satisfied with the location.

Nodding, I only heard him say, "demo, let you walk 300 meters, and I will chase you after washing the car!" " "Dean fell down and fainted. ...

…

13. The white rabbit and the big bear were walking in the forest and accidentally kicked over a jar.

An elf came out of the pot and said that he could satisfy their three wishes.

The bear said, turn it into the strongest bear in the world. Its wish has come true.

The little white rabbit said, give it a small helmet. Its wish has also come true.

The bear said, turn it into the most beautiful bear in the world. Its wish has come true again.

The little white rabbit said, give it a bike. Its wish has come true again.

The bear said, turn all other bears in the world into bitches!

The little white rabbit got on the bike and said as he ran, turn this bear into a homosexual. ...

14. Three white rabbits picked a mushroom.

The two big ones let the small one get some wild vegetables to eat together.

The younger one said I wouldn't go. If I leave, you will eat my mushrooms.

The two older ones said no and went ~ ~ ~

Half a year has passed, and the white rabbit hasn't come back yet. The big one can't come back. Let's eat.

The other big one said wait ~ ~ ~

A year has passed and the white rabbit hasn't come back yet. Don't wait for us to eat.

Just then, the little white rabbit suddenly jumped out of the nearby jungle and said angrily, Look! I know you want to eat my mushrooms.