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Life is like a parabola, and every turn has mixed thoughts. The bits and pieces of this gathering will always be an outstanding fleeting time.

Jason

order

All the words here are addressed to you, to you under the Big Dipper, to you who are kind, pure, warm and give me strength, and to me.

Memories can give people the strength to move forward. 2007 is too much and too important for me. After a long time, I am afraid I will forget. In fact, some memories have gradually blurred. I want to carefully recall the story behind every game and even every song.

Or should I say, from the moment I was born, it meant that I wanted to be with music and you, so I wrote down my past twenty years for the first time, for myself and for everyone who read this book.

Write down what I want to say, what I have experienced, who I love and who I am with you.

Every time I see the blue ocean, every time I hear your loud call, every time I receive your gift, and every time I read your blessing, I am grateful but can't say anything. I'm always all thumbs and don't know how to express my thanks. So, I have to find one stage after another and sing it to you.

You call me Miss Zhang, Steamed Bun, Xiaobai and Jeb. I know all the names and I accept them.

In fact, like you, we are not idols or fans. The Big Dipper is also a star. We are a huge starry family in the galaxy. We are all kind children.

I know you are called Little Star, Menstrual Star and Starfish.

You gave me wings so that I could soar; You give me strength and make me stronger.

So I want to call you-relative.

1989 life is not satisfactory, and you are anxious and heartbroken for me. I know all this, so writing this book will reassure you and let you know that I am fine. The more you experience, the tougher your heart will be.

When you open this book, take a cup of coffee or warm tea and sit quietly on the sofa, as if I were sitting opposite you and chatting with you, I will tell a real me here.

I liked Zheng Zhihua's The Light of the Stars when I was very young. Today, it is you who lit the lamp of hope for me and let me go through one hurdle after another.

Dear you, like my mother, make me respect and want to love.

Believe me, tomorrow, I will enlighten you like the Big Dipper, and we will walk along the road together. Jason will always be song for you, and Jason will only be song for you.

The first chapter nursery rhymes

At this time, listen to a song.

Melody is thinking about the future in the mood.

Back to the starting point

On the swing bridge

A nursery rhyme

Sing to you

Old tape: Grandpa's radio, knocking on the door of dusty music in his last life, humble childhood, is a washed tape that is still trying to save, and the white space is filled with happiness.

A

When I was a child, my life was not so good. At that time, household appliances were rarely seen in a village. For a family like ours, TV is a luxury.

Grandpa likes listening to Sichuan Opera very much. He was a fan of Sichuan Opera from his youth until he was 70 years old. He saved food stamps and gritted his teeth to buy a tape recorder. Is it an old-fashioned tape recorder, gray, big cube, which can only hold one tape, or the kind that inserts tapes manually? This "old machine" is often jammed in a mess, and then grandpa pulls it out piece by piece with his clumsy fingers.

I have never liked listening to Sichuan Opera, but the boring life with some melody is still relatively fresh, and talking is better than nothing. It's just that it's fresher to listen to cicadas in the trees, so when Grandpa listens to Sichuan Opera, I hum along with them.

Strictly speaking, my musical journey in life began with listening to Sichuan Opera.

I really like singing from an accidental listening to songs. In fact, many things are just a fleeting idea at first, and then people with a heart seize this idea and put it into practice with actions, and then spend more time to expand and develop.

Therefore, I think we should thank Ogawa Opera. Although its "ghost call" melody is beyond the appreciation of a child, it prompted my elderly grandfather to buy a tape recorder, so everything happened naturally, and this is the later story.

I don't know what day it is, but the exact time has been forgotten. A distant relative came to my house. Shortly after entering the door, he found grandpa's tape recorder and sat in the chair for a long time. I hid in the distance, afraid to approach, and I couldn't hear what he was listening to. As soon as he left, I hurried over, because I saw him accidentally drop the tape recorder. I picked up the tape recorder and wiped off the dust that didn't exist on it. I checked it over and over again. Not bad, but there is a small crack in the corner of the machine.

However, I came across a tape with several portraits on the cover, which was obviously different from the Sichuan opera tape that Grandpa listened to.

I was going to give it to my mother truthfully, but then I quietly moved my mind. Driven by curiosity, I decided to hide and listen to what it was.

That night, while grandpa was sleeping, I secretly took his tape recorder and hid it in a dark corner outside the house. I put the tape in and press the button, and there is a wonderful sound.

At that time, I listened to Sally Yeh's "Live Sincerely" and "Race with the Bull", and my first reaction was, Wow, what a beautiful voice. I have never heard such wonderful music. The wonderful singing completely broke the single impression of music brought by Sichuan Opera.

In summer, grandpa smoked a pipe and sat on the bluestone under the locust tree to enjoy the cool. The shade of the tree blocks the sunshine, and occasionally a few rays of sunshine come in obliquely through the cracks in the leaves and shine on grandpa's face. The old people are talking about the weather and the harvest. When they are bored, they talk about widows in the West Village and bachelors in the East Village.

I used this time to hide in my room with a tape recorder and listen to music.

After listening to it several times, I began to worry. Didn't grandpa always say that I learned Sichuan Opera quickly? Then I can sing pop songs, too. Pop songs are so beautiful. I even thought to myself: One day I will stand on the stage of showing off and sing my own songs.

I started playing hide-and-seek with my grandfather with a tape recorder every day. Grandpa looked everywhere, and then I hid, causing him to often find a tape recorder and sit at the door anxiously smoking a pipe. After several visits, I learned almost everything.

After all, there is only one tape, which was left by a distant relative who left. After learning, I finally agreed to return the tape recorder to my grandfather.

Grandpa got the tape recorder and said gratefully, "I thought this tape recorder had legs, but I didn't expect you to take it." "It's enough for me not to listen to this Sichuan opera for a few days."

I didn't say anything, but I looked at my grandfather who was cheated by me and didn't know it. I just laughed.

When I grow up, I feel really finished. The inseparable fate between music and me began at that time.

Every night before going to bed, I get up and even eat, humming: the world is long, passers-by are in a hurry, why not run with the bull?

Now that I think about it, I not only walked smartly during that time, but also waved smartly every day, because there were few opportunities to listen to pop songs, let alone sing.

Every time grandpa hears me sing, he touches his beard and says to others, "Jiewazi is promising, and there will be a singer at home."

At this time, I shyly buried my head and ran into the house to steal happiness.

B

After about a month, I suddenly found a red sign on the second button of this recorder. When I press it, I can't make a sound.

Later, I turned the tape upside down and found that everything I said could be recorded. I was so excited that I thought the tape recorder was a great thing. Then I pressed this button when I tried to sing, and I recorded my voice. When you get excited, you can record enough.

Although the recording effect at that time was still poor, it sounded even louder than singing. But I can't tell you how excited and excited I am when I hear my own voice.

One afternoon, I fiddled with the tape recorder, ready to record a complete song. At that time, I could always sing high notes because I didn't change my voice, so I couldn't help singing Sally Yeh's songs. I really wanted to hear what my voice looked like coming out of the tape recorder. As a result, I tossed about all afternoon, instead of recording, I washed the original tape.

I didn't care at first, thinking that since it could be washed away inexplicably, it would definitely have a recovery function. After studying for a few days, I felt something was wrong. Not only did I not understand it, but I also washed more and more tapes. Only then did I realize that it seemed impossible to recover.

I was particularly scared and panicked. What should I do? If my family finds out, will I be punished? Will you be beaten? During that time, every day, I felt like wearing a rabbit. I'm too nervous to touch grandpa's tape recorder again. When I saw the tape recorder, I even felt scared.

My heart itches badly, but I also endure to stay away from the tape recorder. Even if grandpa called me, he would find an excuse to sneak out. For a time, seeing that radio was like a death warrant. This seems to be evidence of my crime. Seeing it seems to show my "heinous". Even I blamed my crime on this tape recorder. Whenever I see my grandfather, I feel like a heinous villain. Grandpa asked me for something, always feeling: this time it's over, it must have been discovered. What to do.

It happened that a new canteen was opened in the town, which was opened by a big brother who just graduated from high school. He often plays some popular songs there, so I often secretly go to his place to listen to songs. Find some excuses every time, sit by and listen quietly.

After a while, I found that the tape I washed didn't seem to attract the attention of my family, probably because my grandfather only liked Sichuan opera, and my parents didn't care about those trivial things.

Over time, I forgot about it. Only that tape is still lying quietly in my drawer, and it has been playing for a long time, tempting me, as if I could hear that wonderful melody again if I stepped closer.

That tape, like a key, gave me a dream and opened the door to music.

Anything that can move people will be addictive. Once it is polluted, it cannot be easily given up. I have always been the kind of person who likes something and insists on liking it to the end, especially when I am young, and I will not give up easily when I am looking for it.

Besides, that song was really nice at that time. I lost it in the middle of learning and forgot. I think it's a pity, but I still want to learn it again. So I borrowed a tape from my brother who opened the shop, and the washed tape became a master tape forever, specially used for recording songs.

That brother is very kind. By chance, he listened to my recorded songs and encouraged me again and again, saying that I must be a singer in the future.

People get a little encouragement and affirmation in their efforts, especially when they are particularly helpless. Just like people in the desert, when there is water suddenly, they will get excited and continue to find ways to live. At that time, I borrowed many tapes from my brother. I remember Zheng Zhihua's Sailor and Light the Stars, and learned many beautiful songs. I can't remember the details, but I'll never forget that happy mood. It is the most beautiful melody that belongs to my childhood.

My favorite song at that time was "Light the Stars" by Zheng Zhihua, because I liked that melody very much. It had many paragraphs, and it felt like a story, just like a child who went out to work hard and met some successes, setbacks and failures, as well as some comments on society later.

I remember the last paragraph best: many years later, a heavy rain woke me up from my deep sleep. ...

Under the deep blue night sky, a person was lying on the open grass, breathing fresh air, listening to this song for many years.

It is the first time that I found that the original lyrics can also express my emotions and some views on society. I think singing is really a beautiful thing. There will always be a star in my heart to light up my future.

Stage: The simple stage and casual karaoke gave a grand applause. Naive voice, a sincere "999 roses" bloomed, and a morning star appeared in the blue starry sky.

I learn to sing to you.

At that time, there were no such exquisite MV pictures as now, just some simple swimsuit girls' pictures kept changing on the screen. The following are simple lyrics, which are particularly colorful in my opinion, because I can hear my voice very clearly and beautifully in the microphone.

In fact, I was shocked by myself after singing the first sentence. My first reaction was that singing karaoke was really cool. Be sure to sing often in the future.

So when I left singing, I was basically not performing for others, but narcissism. According to the popular saying, they are all narcissistic.

As a result, after singing, when I was about to leave, the audience applauded. My feet went numb at once and I stood there at a loss.

Someone shouted below: "Good singing, one more."

It was the first time I enjoyed the feeling of the stage. It's really good to stand on high and sing to the people below, to make yourself happy and to make others happy.

On the way home, I am always immersed in that kind of excitement. I feel uncomfortable walking because I am so excited. As I walked, I remembered the feeling of singing on the stage and only said to my father, "I will sing to you every year."

At that time, I had learned many popular songs, and also learned the latest popular Tai Zhengxiao's 999 Roses. Seeing others sing like this makes my throat itch, and I can't wait to jump on the stage and show it.

But because of timidity, I'm still a little embarrassed and not courageous enough. Many times, I can only imagine it occasionally below.

Thinking of singing at home at ordinary times, my father often hums with me. He also likes this song very much. Even when cooking, he will never forget to call me: "Jason, hurry up, face A is finished, turn the tape over."

So I quietly begged my father and dragged him up.

When I first came on stage, people in the audience ate melon seeds and chatted. Few people noticed my appearance, but I slipped onto the stage like a thief, with only a few people whispering and snickering.

As soon as I opened my mouth, the meeting became a little quieter. Slowly, I was the only one whose voice echoed in the whole meeting. I didn't care to see the expressions of the servants, but I was very excited.

The melody of the whole song seems to be stuck in my throat, and I have to scream desperately to wash them away and force them out.

Only when the middle father sings, there will be occasional bursts of laughter in the venue. I always feel dizzy when I sing, and my whole body is full of strength. My vision is only the lyrics on the screen in front of me, and I can't see anything. I just feel my eyes are red and my cheeks are burning.

At that time, there were no such exquisite MV pictures as now, just some simple swimsuit girls' pictures kept changing on the screen. The following are simple lyrics, which are particularly colorful in my opinion, because I can hear my voice very clearly and beautifully in the microphone.

In fact, I was shocked by myself after singing the first sentence. My first reaction was that singing karaoke was really cool. Be sure to sing often in the future.

So when I left singing, I was basically not performing for others, but narcissism. According to the popular saying, they are all narcissistic.

As a result, after singing, when I was about to leave, the audience applauded. My feet went numb at once and I stood there at a loss.

Someone shouted below: "Good singing, one more."

It was the first time I enjoyed the feeling of the stage. It's really good to stand on high and sing to the people below, to make yourself happy and to make others happy.

On the way home, I am always immersed in that kind of excitement. I feel uncomfortable walking because I am so excited. As I walked, I remembered the feeling of singing on the stage and only said to my father, "I will sing to you every year."

Impression grandpa:

In ordinary life, there is deep affection;

In simple years, I was deeply moved.

Unrefined care is the flint that ignites my life.

Later, dad always said in front, "Jason, you have gained a lot of weight recently." It takes a lot of effort for dad to push it. " I didn't say anything.

Until the end, my father couldn't pedal completely. When I got off the bus, I was scared. My foot is stuck in it.

When I finally took my foot out, I found it was bloody and my socks were stuck to my foot. My father accused me lovingly: "Why don't you scream, this child?"

I was so confused at that time that I kept staring at my feet. I didn't cry until the hospital doctor wrapped me in gauze. After leaving the hospital, I let out a cry: "Dad, it hurts."

Later, I lived in the hospital for a period of time. Grandpa was in my ward almost every day, and bought me some fruits and biscuits, some delicious and fun. I felt bored, so I said to my grandfather, "I don't want to stay in the hospital all the time."

Grandpa touched my head and said, "OK. Grandpa takes you out to watch Sichuan Opera. "

Grandpa is a fan. When I was a child, he often took me to see Sichuan Opera performances. He also sings occasionally. He sings well and looks good. After wearing makeup, he is very handsome. There are often people who see my grandfather as if he had seen a star, and some people greet me in order to get close, and then people next to me will pinch my face when they see me: "Hey, look how handsome Lao Zhang's grandson is, just like a rich boy, he will grow up with promise."

Grandpa enjoyed their praise happily, but I didn't like it. I shook off the man's hand and said, "You are a talented boy. I want to be a singer. "

Whenever this time, grandpa laughed and said loudly, "OK, singer, Jawa will be a singer in the future."

The people next to him also smiled, laughing their heads off.

I feel particularly proud. Every time grandpa goes out, I will follow him, but not because those people praise me. In fact, most of them are for food.

C

When I was a child, I didn't have any delicious food, let alone even saw it. It would be nice to have a chicken to eat at that time. Every time I eat chicken, my grandfather gives me a chicken head and says, "Well, after eating this, everything you do is the best."

Grandpa's education is not particularly high, so there are no new words. This sentence was tossed by him, but when I grew up, I finally understood his feelings. He is eager to hurt me.

He always describes me with many real things, so that I can understand a truth and let people understand it quickly.

For example, one summer, enjoying the cool outside at night, he said to me, "A man should be down-to-earth and walk like a brick." If you cover them one by one, they will not fall down next to each other, and they will fall down if they are piled there. " Later, I learned that he just wanted to say that people should be down-to-earth and step by step, and they should not be opportunistic.

From my grandfather, I learned a lot about being a man and my attitude towards people. It can be said that grandpa has the most important influence on my character gradually formed in my later life growth. Now when I do a lot of things, I think of my grandfather, how he will solve it, and then make my own decisions.

Naughty bag: childhood memories are locked in an obsessed game machine, in countless exercise books, in a lovely young lady next door, or in the head of an unknown ghost ... It turns out that everyone was naughty when they were young.

A game machine

When I was in primary school, I was crazy about playing video games. Even many students often skip classes and go out to play games. During that time, my mind was full of video games. At that time, a classmate said that my childhood was incomplete without a game machine. I'm sure my childhood was complete because of the game machine. As for the process of getting hooked on video games, it is also a very accidental opportunity.

Once an old man came to town, holding a TV set and a bully game machine and began to solicit customers in the street. At that time, I didn't know what it was, but I saw a group of bosses looking around, and I followed.

Contra, tank battle, watching them have fun, I followed with relish.

I might be curious when I was a child. When I see something new, I will always look at it and remember it. In this way, I watched it for several months.

Actually, I didn't really want to try it at first, but it itched a little. The first is because I have no money, and the second is actually worried that I won't play.

One day, a big brother turned around and saw me and said to me, "Son, you can't learn by watching it every day. Go, go. "

Playing games is easy, and I'm not stupid. I'm a little unconvinced You know, I refuse to give up easily on anything.

It happened that my grandfather gave me two yuan to buy a pen that day, so I had some money on me and the confidence to speak. But after all, I haven't played it yet. I am afraid of jokes. I just bickered with him, but I didn't really fight. I stood there and continued to watch them play.

When they all left, the old man smiled and said, "Try it. It's fun. Give you free play. "

The result is this free play, which has passed my addiction.