Classical Chinese funny stories

1. Interesting stories in classical Chinese Three interesting stories in classical Chinese: A meat thief went to Beijing to sell meat, stopped in front of a roadside toilet to relieve himself and hung the meat outside.

Seeing this, the second man stole the meat. Before he went far, A came out of the toilet, grabbed B and asked B if he had seen anyone take his meat from the toilet.

B was afraid that A would see through, so he put the meat in his mouth early and said impatiently, "You are such an idiot! How to hang the meat outside the door without losing it? If you put meat in your mouth like me, is there any reason to lose it? " -Han Wei Danchun's "Laughing Forest" What is the name of Tang Xuanzong Tianbao? In the early years, He, a minister with a famous literary name, wrote to the court and wanted to retire to his hometown of Wuzhong. Xuanzong Li Longji respected him very much and treated everything differently.

When He Zhangzhi left, he said goodbye to Tang Xuanzong, and his eyes were full of tears. Tang Xuanzong asked him what other requirements he had.

Zhang Zhi said: "I know that Zhang Zhang has a son who hasn't been named yet. If your majesty gives it a name, I will be honored to return to China. " Xuanzong said: "Faith is the core of Tao. Blessed people have faith.

Qing's son should be called Fu. "Know chapter thank humbly.

It took me a long time to realize. I thought to myself, "The emperor is so happy with me. I'm from Wu, and the word' fu' is the word' claw' followed by the word' zi'.

He named my son Fu, didn't he call my son's paw? When Su Dongpo heard that Wang's On Ci had just been written, he went to the government to congratulate him and joked: "In the masterpiece, it is said that' bamboo' whips' horses' as' Benedict'. But I still have a question: "I don't know what's so funny about whipping dogs with bamboo?" Gong Jing just laughed and asked, "Is there any evidence that the word' pigeon' is changed from' bird' to' nine'? Dongpo immediately replied, "The Book of Songs says,' The dead pigeon is in mulberry, and his son is seven'. Together with their parents, it is exactly nine. "

Hearing Wang's words, he nodded happily. It was a long time before I knew that Su Dongpo had played a big joke with him again.

-Song, Su Shi, Ming and Wang Shizhen's second "Teasing".

2. Humorous The art of people laughing in short stories in classical Chinese is mainly expressed through humor.

The essence of humor is funny, ridiculous and meaningful. Humor is the crystallization of human wisdom and an advanced emotional activity and aesthetic activity. Any plain and mediocre value orientation and stereotyped way of thinking have nothing to do with humor.

In real life, we can often see that the arguments between the two sides are fierce, tense and deadlocked, often because one or two humorous words from a third party can make both sides laugh, put down their words and make up. In lifeless and monotonous situations, people will laugh and laugh because of someone's humor, break this silence, activate people's tired and numb nerves, and thus create a vivid, healthy and interesting atmosphere.

Therefore, in a sense, humor is a mediator to solve human contradictions, a stimulant to enliven and enrich human life, an elegant spiritual activity and a beautiful behavior. The 68 humorous stories selected here reflect the social life and human feelings in ancient China, especially since the Middle Ages.

These jokes are illusory, real, revealing, critical, beautiful, ironic, ironic, explanatory and colorful, which bring people into an ancient and realistic fascinating world and thus get the greatest spiritual and emotional satisfaction. A meat thief went to Beijing to sell meat, stopped to urinate in front of a toilet on the side of the road and hung the meat outside.

Seeing this, the second man stole the meat. Before he went far, A came out of the toilet, grabbed B and asked B if he had seen anyone take his meat from the toilet.

B was afraid that A would see through, so he put the meat in his mouth early and said impatiently, "You are such an idiot! How to hang the meat outside the door without losing it? If you put meat in your mouth like me, is there any reason to lose it? " -Han Weiyuchun's "Laughing Forest" name game Xu Zhicai, the king of Xiyang in the Northern Qi Dynasty, is very eloquent, especially good at word games. When he is not the king, he tries to play with the king, a senior minister.

Wang laughed at the name and said, "Your name is Zhicai. What's the point? In my opinion, it is similar to call it' lack of talent'. " Hearing this, he immediately laughed at Wang's surname: "The word Wang is added to the left of the word, 呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄2157

Wang was tongue-tied and embarrassed. On another occasion, Xu Zhicai entertained guests, and Lu Yuanming was present.

During the dinner, Lu Yuanming made fun of his surname and said, "The word' Xu' means not entering the people (Wei added' Yu' and' Jin')." Immediately mocked Yuan Ming's surname-the word "Lu": "The word" Lu "means" An "printed a public character as" Lu ",and then matched it with a horse to make a donkey. "

Lu Yuanming was flushed and speechless, and the room was full of laughter. -Old title Sui Hou Bai's "Qi Yan Lu" Bird's Nest and calf Hou Bai later became an official of the Tang Dynasty, often with solve riddles on the lanterns. Hou Baixian made three chapters for everyone: "What you guess must be a visible object; Second, you can't make empty explanations to confuse everyone; Third, if the explanation is finished, but you can't see this thing, you should be punished. "

Then he first made a riddle: "The back is as big as a house, the abdomen is as big as a pillow (the crossbar behind the car), and the mouth is as big as a cup." Everyone guessed for a long time, but no one guessed right. They all said, "Where is an object with a mouth as big as a cup and a back as big as a room?" There is no such thing. You must make a bet with all of us. "

Hou Bai finished gambling with everyone and explained, "This is the swallow's nest." They burst out laughing.

On another occasion, Hou Bai attended a large banquet. During the dinner, everyone asked him to make a riddle for entertainment.

What you guess can neither be strange nor difficult to understand, nor can it be abstract and untrue. Hou Bai replied, "There is something as big as a dog and looks like an ox.

What is this? "People are competing to guess, some people say it's a roe deer, others say it's a deer, but they all deny it. Let Hou Bai tell the answer.

Hou Bai laughed and said, "This is a calf." -The old title "Qi" by Sui Houbai asks for the name of Tianbao. In his early years, the famous secret supervisor He wrote to the court and wanted to retire to his hometown of Wuzhong.

Xuanzong Li Longji respected him very much and treated everything differently. When He Zhangzhi left, he said goodbye to Tang Xuanzong, and his eyes were full of tears.

Tang Xuanzong asked him what other requirements he had. Zhang Zhi said: "I know that Zhang Zhang has a son who hasn't been named yet. If your majesty gives it a name, I will be honored to return to China. "

Xuanzong said: "Faith is the core of Tao. Blessed people have faith. The son of Qing should be named Fu. "

Know the chapter and thank humbly. It took me a long time to realize. I thought to myself, "The emperor is so happy with me.

I'm from Wu, and the word' fu' is the word' claw' followed by the word' zi'. He named my son Fu, didn't he call my son's paw? -Gao Songyi's "Living in Groups" does not know what poetry is. Ai Zi likes to write poems.

One day, Ai Zi swam between Qi and Wei and stayed in a hotel. In the evening, he heard someone talking next door: "A song."

After a while, he said, "One more song." Ai Zi was baffled and sleepy all night.

Lying until dawn, * * * heard the man in the next room say about six or seven times, that is, six or seven songs. Ai Zi thought that the man in the next room must be a poet. He was quietly absorbed in poetry at the foot of the mountain, and he felt respect in his heart. He also liked this man's quick thinking and decided to get to know him.

Early in the morning, Ai Zi got dressed and got up, adjusted her crown belt and stood at the door to meet her. Soon, a peddler-like man came out of the next room, thin and ill.

Ai Zi was disappointed, thinking: With this respect, you look like a poet. Perhaps, people can't judge people by their appearances, and they can't guess blindly. He went up to him and asked, "I heard that Mr. Wang has many poems." Can I see them? "

The man said, "I'm a businessman and I never know what poetry is." Has refused to come up with poetry.

Ai Zi stubbornly said, "I heard you say' one' in the house last night, and then you said' one'. Isn't that a poem? " Hearing this, the man couldn't help laughing: "You misunderstood. Last night, my stomach was upset. Every time I have diarrhea, I can't find toilet paper at night, so I wipe it with my hands.

Diarrhea lasted all night, and my hands were dyed almost six or seven times. When I say' hand', I don't mean the first poem. "

Ai zi, listen.

3. China's classical humorous stories [original]

If Lu has a long pole to enter the city gate, hold it firmly at the beginning and cannot enter; You can't get in if you hold it sideways. Nothing can be done. My father came to Russia and said, "I am not a saint, but I have seen a lot!" " Why not use a saw? "So I cut it off.

Translation:

There was a man in the state of Lu who went to town with a thick and long bamboo root. When he reached the gate, he stood up to get it, but he was stuck by the gate. He took it sideways and got stuck in the walls on both sides. After a long struggle, he was too tired to enter the city. An old man next to him looked at him and smiled: "You big straw bag! There is only one string in my head! At my age, I have crossed more bridges than you have. Why don't you ask me? " The bamboo seller quickly bowed to him: "Please give me more advice!" " The old man stroked his white beard and said, "It's very simple. You saw the bamboo in two and went in. " "If the bamboo is sawed off, it can't be used." "That's better than being stuck outside the city!" The bamboo seller borrowed a saw, sawed off the bamboo and took it to the city.

[hint]

If the bamboo seller is stupid and ridiculous, then the old man with white beard who likes to teach others a lesson is even more stupid. Some "old hands" always like to do things according to old experience and old rules. They are not good at flexibly considering extremely simple or even common sense problems according to the actual situation. As a result, many bad ideas were put forward.