A friend circle joke with a stomachache.

1. When I was a child, I always heard people say to me, "It doesn't matter if you don't look good now, but you will look good when you grow up in a few years." Ten years later, I didn't grow up, but I wanted to.

Don't always complain about your mobile phone card. If you face your face for a few hours every day, don't you have to commit suicide?

3. selfies can be repaired, but don't repair too much. Otherwise, others will not only think you are ugly, but also think you are hypocritical when they see real people!

Some parents educate their children. There is no scientific method, no rules, and it is entirely by touching ... like my dad!

The only acceptable way for a lazy and delicious person like me to lose weight is to go to the toilet more often.

6. My wife always warns me not to find a mistress by crying, making trouble and hanging herself, which makes me very angry because she never makes a third move.

Seven. I hate those children the most. They fantasize about being princesses all day. It is so boring. I'm different. I am the prince.

Eight. Girls often want to find a white horse, but when they open their eyes, they find that the world is full of grey donkeys.

9. Every time I don't want to study, I tell myself in the mirror that if I grow up like this, I must study hard, otherwise others will say that that person has nothing but beauty.

10. Ugly children must run hard, because if they run fast, others can't see Zhang Chou's face clearly.

1 1. I found a thief at home in the middle of the night and stayed in bed. I also expect him to find some money in my house.

12. Finding someone to pay back the money is like unrequited love. I always feel embarrassed when I say it. When you get up the courage to say it, it becomes like confession. Maybe you don't even have friends.

Thirteen. Although I am often beaten by my wife, God knows that my wife is not an unreasonable person. She always asks my permission before calling. When I said no, she called me and said yes.

The so-called pig-like roommate is that I caught a cold and asked him to bring a box of black and white. As a result, he brought me a packet of cream chocolate biscuits.

Fifteen. Many people say that if you can't tell fortune, you will get thinner and thinner. However, sometimes we have to believe. The fortune teller used to say that I was 27 years old and wore a yellow robe. Every day, there is food and transportation. It's so accurate to deliver takeout in the US Mission now.

16. I feel that life is always aimed at you everywhere because you are ugly. If you are beautiful, it's as if you are hanging up every day.

Seventeen. When I was a child, I raised 100 yuan to buy a car. The boss said my money was fake. Nonsense, of course it's fake, and your car is not real.

18. People who often say that you are fat will not dislike you. People who often say that you are short will not laugh at you. People who often say you are stupid will ignore you. People who often call you stupid, hit him! He is used to it!

19. looks are given by the previous generation, education is determined by the previous generation, ideas are taught by the previous generation, and the environment is left by the previous generation. How dare you say that each generation is worse than the next?

You must study hard and don't eat and drink with a handsome face like me.

2 1. Don't ask me why I haven't been single for so long. Because the woman has a boyfriend, I dare not look for it for fear that her boyfriend will hit me. If you don't have a boyfriend, prove that no one wants it. Well, I don't want it either

22. Mom and Dad are really amazing creatures. They believe all the rumors in their circle of friends, but they will expose your lies at a glance.

Twenty-three Selling cute should also be divided into people. Only those who are good-looking can sell cute, and those who are ugly can only pretend to be crazy.

24. Recently, a colleague wanted to resign. Our boss said, "Since we have known each other for a while, don't end it hastily. Let's get together for dinner. " Then, after two days of careful preparation, the hotel's after-dinner activities are all ready, except for one thing, which is to inform colleagues.