Write your name on the cigarette and place it closest to my heart

"Write your name on the cigarette, inhale it into your lungs, and put you as close as possible to my heart."

On the day you left, this song kept repeating in the speakers. You packed my luggage for me to go home for the Spring Festival. We both couldn't bear to part with each other and hated this Spring Festival. After procrastinating for a long time, the new year is approaching, I watched the last movie, drank the last bowl of soup in a familiar place, and fulfilled all the rituals.

After I sent you to the car, you left. The back of the car was as cold as winter. I squatted there for ten minutes without getting up. My heart and legs were soft and I was confused. Tears flowed unbridled. .

Even though we were separated a few days ago, in order to comfort each other, we kept planning our post-holiday life, what New Year movies to watch, where to eat spicy noodles... At this moment, these have become sharp swords. Deeply pierced into my heart...

Face time rang and connected. You were in tears and said you wanted to get off the car and come back. I refused. The driver must have laughed at us twenty years ago. Minutes, we didn't say anything for those twenty minutes. We looked at each other and cried for twenty minutes through a screen, unscrupulously and as if no one else was around. I still have to hang up. Tell me, letting me smoke a cigarette will relieve you a lot.

Tear open the tin paper. Twenty cigarettes are arranged neatly in the cigarette box, and when you take out one, it actually has the word "Liu" written all over it. I recall that you put this pack of cigarettes in my pocket before leaving. I hid it in the bathroom for an hour last night. It turned out that it was just for this reason. The cigarettes were restored as if they had not been opened, except that the plastic wrap was missing.

I took out one and lit it in a daze. It seemed that I was relieved a lot. It must be the name on the cigarette that played a role. My heart felt a lot warmer and I seemed to have gained a lot of distance.

Just like that, I sat where I left and finished smoking the pack of cigarettes with your name written all over it. The planned ten-day separation finally turned into a lifetime. That pack of cigarettes was engraved in my heart, and you stayed closest to my heart.

Tear yourself apart. I miss you today but I can’t list them neatly. Bits and pieces of the past pop up from time to time, looming. Still separated, still separate hearts.

Light a cigarette. Your name will no longer be on the cigarette. Light a ray of longing, the cigarette is short, but the longing is long. Like nicotine, it wraps around the lungs and penetrates into the heart. The word "Liu" was not removed after all.

A pack of twenty cigarettes, I keep smoking, just want to forget you. I lit twenty cigarettes but couldn't find any reason to forget you...

The first cigarette: Inhaled from my mouth, passed through my heart, penetrated my blood, and swayed out of my lungs. Let it accompany me back to the autumn when I first saw you, to remember the day when happiness began...

The second cigarette: burn out between my index fingers until it becomes a sponge. I can't help but miss your first silly smile towards me...

The third cigarette: I am very lonely, always wrapped in quilt at night, because I miss you.

The fourth cigarette: The longing for the last cigarette continues to intensify with the darkness.

The fifth cigarette: The burning cigarette is real, but the "I love you" you often say can no longer be truly heard. ? Sixth cigarette: Do you remember the last time I called you wife?

? The seventh cigarette: I crushed it into pieces and threw it out of my sight. Because last time I smoked the seventh cigarette in a row, it was the first time I saw you angry.

The eighth cigarette: It blackened my lungs, just like your warm words at that time, which always lingered in my heart.

The ninth cigarette: represents eternity. The vows of each other at that time were engraved in my heart, and the word "long" was greatly smoked in my life, but it was black.

How I want you to stay in my world for a longer time...

The tenth cigarette: Too much smoke has blinded my eyes and confused my heart, accompanied by tears My heart can no longer see everything clearly?

The eleventh cigarette: Besides you, who will help me count, and who will say that I smoke too much again! Which ashes is this? Do you want me to leave you in advance and go to another world?

The twelfth cigarette: When I popped out the cigarette butt that was already burned into my hand, I really wanted to ask you if the sparks that flew up were still as handsome as you said at the time, but my dear, where are you? I can't find it anymore!

The Thirteenth Cigarette: I am sitting where I am. In this hot summer, I start to feel cold and tremble with heartache. Are you okay? Can you feel my pain? If you are cold too , I am still willing to give you my warmth, hold you tightly into my arms, but I am only cold, and will only make your palms as cold as mine

The fourteenth cigarette: The hot cigarette butt still makes my palms cold, but it will never be as hot as the warmth you give me and can warm my heart.

? The fifteenth cigarette: I need courage to miss you, repeating the slogan one, two, three... Can I still smoke three more times with this small piece of cigarette left? Let me still have it Three times of courage allowed me to light another cigarette...

Sixteenth cigarette: If I asked you to write your name on all the cigarettes I smoke for the rest of my life, when these words are When it turns into ashes, will you still feel that I am thinking of you even if we are separated, and the past will be engraved in your heart, even if you just think about it unintentionally?

Root 17 Yan: In the cold winter of farewell, every time you sit on my knees, hold my hand and gently lean your head on my shoulder, then put your hand in my pocket and hold it tightly... right? Really everything will be forgotten, drifting away like smoke, as if nothing happened...

Eighteenth cigarette: If we met in the autumn of this year, and found that I was no longer at the next similar intersection, Will you remember me? Will you chase the road we walked hand in hand in our memories?

The 19th cigarette: You said you like my smile, but I never laughed again, only tears kept moistening my face, then Do you know why it is wet?

The twentieth cigarette: You said you were unhappy when you left, because love is happiness and we are together. If you are not happy, why are you still together? I believe you will be able to find your happiness, but how do you understand my sadness, and how do you return me happiness? Now that you are gone, do you have both happiness?

When the last cigarette After the draw, my thoughts about you never stopped. I bought the wrong ticket, boarded the wrong flight, and took the wrong taxi in a familiar city. On the day we parted, I smoked more than these twenty cigarettes every day. The reason I gave myself for forgetting can be represented by more than twenty sparks, but the reason I think of you is like the burning smoke of these twenty cigarettes, which is a long and messy mess. But there are only twenty cigarettes in a pack. Why not have one more? I smoked nineteen cigarettes. I hope each one is sandalwood in front of the Buddha. I pray that you will sit quietly when the twenty cigarettes are lit. I was in the car next to you, but you never showed up again. But there is only the last one. When the next pack of cigarettes is lit, do I still have enough courage to light it to give myself a reason to miss you?

I anesthetized myself, did I turn around, you I was about to turn around, so I believed that the earth was round. I smoked and walked in the opposite direction so that I could meet you on the way. I am willing to spend my whole life gambling on a misty person as long as the smoke lasts. The next time we meet again...

The smoke has already blackened my heart, but the moment I see you, I will pop the cigarette butt in my hand with the most handsome posture, and in an instant it will be a long-lost red heart...