A joke that can scold others.

Answer the question: A teacher likes to ask the students in the front row to answer questions, so he saw A, but he didn't know the name, so he said, "The student sleeping in the front row, you answer."

I saw a tingle sitting up, waking up the classmate B next to him and shouting, "The teacher asked you to answer the question!" " "

Then lie down and sleep beautifully. ...

Reason for being late: In a rural primary school, a pupil was late for class. When the teacher asked him to explain the reason, he told the truth: "I drove a sow to breed early this morning, so I came late."

The teacher said angrily, "Why don't you let your father do such a thing?"

The student asked in surprise, "How can this be done?" This thing must be a wild boar. "

Crow: A teacher taught a word "bird" in Chinese class on the first day, and wrote the word "bird calls" on the blackboard the next day, leading students to read "crow".

A student raised his hand and said, "Teacher, no, that's a bird."

Teacher: "Nonsense, crows are birds of course."

Here I want to give some advice to those who are about to retire. If you are only 65 years old, don't enter the retirement community. Because everyone there is seventy or eighty years old or eighty or ninety years old. Whenever they want to move, lift or load something, they shout, "Let the little one do it." Mom: Freddie, why is your face so red?

Freddie: I just ran into the street to stop a fight?

Mom: You did the right thing. Who is fighting with whom?

Freddie: Me and Jack Smith.

A famous priest and several old people in his parish attended a foreign meeting until dark. They plan to eat something before going home. But unfortunately, only one restaurant with a bad reputation is open.

After dinner, an old man asked the priest to pray. "I think I will pass," said the priest. "I don't want the Lord to know that I am here."

Tom: William borrowed five pounds from me. Should I lend it to him?

Jack: Of course.

Tom: Why?

Jack: Otherwise, he should borrow it from me.

An old lady is deaf and always thinks things are too expensive. She walks into a shop.

She asked the clerk, "How much is this thing?"

"Seven dollars, madam, which is very cheap." The old lady said, "It's too expensive. Fourteen dollars is almost the same. "

The clerk quickly said, "I didn't say seventeen, it was seven."

"It's still too expensive," said the old lady. "I'll buy it for five dollars."

Mom: Why do you keep jumping up and down?

Tom: I just took the medicine, but I forgot to shake the bottle first.

One night, I drove my husband's car to go shopping. When I came back, I found the car was covered with dust, so I scrubbed it for a while. When I finally entered the room, I shouted, "The woman who loves you the most in the world just scrubbed your headlights and windshield."

The husband looked up and said, "Is mom here?"

Mr. Johnson: Are you going to use the lawn mower this afternoon?

Mr. Smith: Yes.

Mr. Johnson: Great. Since you don't need a tennis racket, can I borrow it?

(whoops ~ ~ (> _ <; ) ~ ~ ~, it's hard for people to hit k ~ ~ ~)