Humorous jokes and jokes

Smiling is less than ten years, and smiling more helps us to become younger. Laughter is an infectious thing, and people bring happiness to others or themselves through words and actions. What follows is a humorous joke I carefully prepared for you. Welcome to watch!

Humorous jokes and jokes are very long (hot articles)

1. Who invented this baby, an alien creature who can't communicate at all, a bare machine without any files. The standby time is extremely short, and it can be charged at one time and cannot be returned. However, you like the development process. Stand up and feel the same way!

2. "A diaosi went to a karaoke bar and asked a young lady to accompany him. You want 300, he gives you 1000. Miss feels that meeting a noble person. The next night, diaosi ordered a young lady again, and the young lady sold harder and got another thousand. On the third night, the lady ordered again; ? I have never met such a nice person as you. Where are you from? Diaosi said: X county, X province. The young lady cheered:? We come from the same town! What are you doing here? Diaosi said: Business trip, your mother asked me to give you 3,000 yuan! ? "

I told my friends what would happen if you were the only man in the world. Most people say it's awesome But he said, Wow, I'll sell cucumbers. Such a good business opportunity. I lost to him?

I had nothing to do last night. I wore conspicuous nail polish. I walked with another female colleague this morning. She took a look and said lightly, Don't wear nail polish, it's easy to get gynecological diseases? For an instant, I felt that I was drowned by the Yellow River.

5.？ Mom, borrow the ocean for a while. ? Why kill people? ? What? Who is it? Your grandson! ?

6. I thought about it in my mind. Two pieces are itchy. I held a hard stick in my hand and stuck it in the middle. It's short and soft for a while, and two pieces don't itch, and I don't want to. Alas ~ ~ ~ It's time to give up smoking. Hey ~ ~ ~ think about the crooked children's shoes.

7. "During the war years, there was a big conscription somewhere, and there was no male father at home. Guangzong Yaozu? Let a daughter of her own family dress up as a woman and go to the army. In a fierce battle, the girl just had her period. The rude colonel saw the blood on her trousers and ran over to ask her where she was hurt. The girl blushed and said, nothing! When the colonel saw it, he forcibly took off her pants and said in panic, Shit! That guy is furious and says it's okay! ? "

8. Someone received a text message in the middle of the night:? Are you asleep? Answer:? No? I miss you? I miss you, too? My wife is asleep? My wife is asleep, too?

Humorous jokes are very long (classic)

1. Classmate A has an unusual personality, and all students admire him. A gala was held on New Year's Day, and every student performed a program. He performed magic, went on stage and sat on a stool. Put the book on the zipper of his pants, and then he stared at a girl in our class. After the bell rang, he said: the name of magic is a touching book ... the teacher burst into tears?

2. I just updated the new version of mobile QQ, and a few years later I saw my friend's head lit up. Do you think I should say hello to him?

3. The sister upstairs came to my house to borrow the bathroom, but nothing happened for a long time. I was worried and asked, Sister, are you all right? She replied weakly, I'm sorry, it came so suddenly. Can you buy it for me? I bought sanitary napkins and stuffed them under the door. My sister finally came out. Thank you. I can't repay you today How about a few days? God, how can I understand this?

There was a time when my buddy's cheeks were always red and swollen. Every time I ask him, he answers:? My girlfriend and I got angry and had a fight. ? Strangely, his face hasn't swollen since he bought a pump.

The goddess' middle finger has been injured for several days and has not recovered. I took a picture and told her. As soon as I saw it, I replied: Don't always let the wound get wet. Then everyone downstairs said I was right, and finally I was hacked ... what did I do wrong?

6. When I came home last night, I met a woman and asked me, Sir, do you need any service? I said:? No money! ? The woman quickly said:? It's very cheap, sir. ? I said:? I have a girlfriend! ? The woman is depressed and scolds:? Nowadays, girls are so casual that it is difficult for me to do business! ?

7. Tell the true story of childhood. My buddy's house is not equipped with a security door, and thieves have entered. My buddy's father is still in bed, watching the thief rummaging through things, quietly walking over and hitting him from behind! The thief fainted as a result! Then the police came! Took the thief away with his father. ...

8. Female colleagues often change boyfriends and then go to the hotel to check in. I don't know why I lost my temper as soon as I came back today. We asked why, and she said? Never go to that hotel again. The boss actually said he would introduce me to business! Shit, who do you think I am?

Humorous jokes and jokes (selected articles)

1. Husband: Honey, I want to change my mobile phone with you. Wife: Why change with me? Isn't your mobile phone better than mine? Husband: No, your mobile phone is better. Wife: Where is it? Husband: Your mobile phone can automatically connect to WIFI wherever it goes.

2. The proprietress of a company was on a business trip, and the boss left her four-year-old daughter in the company. The children are curious about everything, looking east and feeling west. The boss's female secretary was very angry and said that you shouted and kicked you out. The little girl replied, then why did you shout so loudly in my father's room yesterday? The little girl was so loud that everyone in the office bowed their heads and said nothing.

I made my wife angry last night. I wanted to press the bed and give it a try, so I threw my wife on the bed. Wife: Don't do that. It's useless to me. Isn't it always said on the internet that this move is good for your wife? I am different from others. I'm sick. Me: I'll treat you if you are sick! I was about to start work when the second-rate wife said that the disease could not be cured in half an hour or two. Me: ...

I am a female employee of our company. A male colleague always quarrels with me at ordinary times. Yesterday, because my partner asked for leave, I had no choice but to work the night shift with me. I am in a bad mood. While working, I talked to my girlfriend on the phone and pushed the product back. I was angry and said to him loudly? Would you stop pushing like that? Have they all gone out? . The goods gave me a cold look? That's what I like to push. It makes me feel comfortable. No, no, honey, let me explain.

Chatting with the little girl in the same village today. I said I liked her very much. She said she wouldn't do it I said she wouldn't. I just asked you to be my right-hand man. As a result, she understood. Kicked me, alas! Stop it, it hurts. ...

My roommate went to see a net friend yesterday. Me: How do I meet netizens? Roommate: It feels good. Me: Oh? What kind of girl makes you feel so good? Roommate: I like her hesitation. Me: Huh? Is there such a simple girl now? You don't stutter, do you? Roommate: That's not true. Me: ...

7. A couple was sleeping at night when the door was blown open by the wind and rang. Wife:? No, my husband is back! ? The husband was frightened after hearing this and immediately jumped from the second floor window.

8. A while ago, I read on the news that there was a newly married couple who had sex about 100 days after marriage, and as a result, the man died of essence. What about that woman? A: Not on the news. Next to the result is a funny contrast: B sucks.

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