Unimaginable and hilarious non-mainstream classic quotes from Tianya

1. Tian*ya poster: Nominate the mainland actor who plays the most resemblance to the underworld boss.

Tian*ya Sofa: Gu Yue.

2. Tian*ya poster: In fact, Newton was just lucky to discover the law of gravity. If I had been born three hundred years earlier, I could have done it too!

Tian*ya replied: Newton was indeed a lucky man, because what hit him on the head was an apple, while what hit the poor poster on the head was either a durian or a coconut~

3. Tian*ya poster (male): I was molested by my uncle when I was a child. How can I get rid of this psychological shadow now that I have grown up?

Tian*ya replied: Anyone who offends my chrysanthemum will be punished no matter how far away he is!

4. Tian*ya poster: Photos of me and my girlfriend, Tianya friends smashed them ~

Tian*ya reply: The sexual organs of plants are inserted into the excretion of long-horned artiodactyls On things...

5. Tian*ya poster: Have you ever seen a rooster laying eggs?

Tian*Ya Sofa: No, but I have seen CCTV telling the truth.

Ti*Ya poster: Oh, you are so awesome, I admire you so much!

6. Tian*ya poster: I bought a new manor. It would scare you to death to tell you how big it is - it took me two and a half hours to drive around it! ! !

Tian*Ya Sofa: Well, I used to have such a broken car~

7. Tian*Ya poster: A female vendor selling pineapples in Nantou, Shenzhen bit her in desperation. The little JJ from the uncle who is in charge of the city...

Tian*Ya Sofa: Humph! If you don’t let me live, I won’t let you enjoy life! ! !

8. Tian*ya poster: Talking to the idiots at work every day makes me feel that my future is very slim...

Tian*ya sofa: Be happy for you~ Because playing the piano to a cow is not a good idea It's scary. What's really scary is a herd of cows playing the piano to you every day!

9. Tian*ya poster: Isn’t it hot for you women to wear bras in summer?

Tian*ya’s reply: It would be too hot if we didn’t take you with us...

10. Tian*ya poster: When I was having sex with my girlfriend, she seemed to have called another man’s name...

Tian*Ya Sofa: Why are you dissatisfied with someone else’s woman? ! !

11. Tian*ya poster: Why was the Japanese side relatively indifferent when President Hu visited Japan, and even the airport didn’t even hang a welcome sign?

Tian*Ya Sofa: How to hang it? Warmly welcome old Chinese friends to Japan?

12. Tian*ya poster: Last year I went to Heilongjiang to discuss business, and I had sex with a Russian girl for two hours at night. What do you think she said to me after I finished cumming? Hehe~

Tian*ya Sofa: Are Chinese men really strong?

Tian*Ya Bench: Are~~~you~~~ready?

13. Tian*Ya poster: Taking advantage of the asymmetry of information between the East and the West, many foreign stalls sell goods to China. It has become a luxury product, so what rubbish Chinese brands are passing off as high-end goods abroad?

Tian*ya replied: Zhang Ziyi.

14. Tian*ya poster: Collect the most harsh words that do not contain any curse words.

Tian*ya Reply 31: Did your mother throw away the person when she gave birth to you and raise the placenta?

Tian*ya replied 32: I have more than 300 photos of your mother on my computer!

15. Tian*ya poster: I have always felt that Scorpion is the most beautiful woman in the whole "Journey to the West". When she forced Tang Seng to the bed and teased him, I couldn't help but cheer for Tang Seng: Let’s do it, let’s do it, let’s just do it! But at the critical moment, the abominable Wukong appeared again...

Tian*ya replied 12: Alas, it would be great if the lustful Bajie appeared instead~

Tian*ya replied 13 : Well, Bajie showed up, and this time he changed the scorpion spirit...

16. Tian*ya poster: Dad gave my husband a deer whip. What do you think it means? There are also photos~

Tian*Ya Sofa: This is the encouragement of the older generation to the younger generation~~~

17. Tian*Ya poster: Let’s talk about it A story with a scary beginning, a funny middle, and a tragic ending. For example, there once was a ghost who farted and died.

Tian*ya Sofa: Met Sister Furong, fell in love with Sister Furong, married Sister Furong...

18. Tian*ya poster: I suspected that my wife Hongxing was having an affair, but Suffering from the lack of evidence...

Tian*ya's reply: If you don't have the ability to be Edison Chen, then be Nicholas Tse~

19. Tian*ya poster: "The Legend of the Condor Heroes" What is the gonggong sand on Xiao Longnu's arm and what is it used for?

Tian*ya replied: Shou Gongsha is the desktop shortcut for virgin.

20. Tian*ya poster: The news said that someone was swallowed by a python. What should I do if I actually encounter a python in the wild?

Tian*Ya Reply 11: Pinch the seven inches and poke the anus, two very effective methods, I hope everyone will spread them widely.

Tian*Ya Reply 12: Stab the snake’s anus or your own anus?

……

Tian*ya replied 47: Bullshit, what are you going to do in the wilderness!

Tian*ya replied 48: Xu Xian knows what to poke with! Super funny non-mainstream classic quotes

1. The reason why angels can fly is because they take themselves very lightly

2. I only believe in two people in this world, One is me and the other is not you.

3. When you put on the wedding dress of love, I also put on the monk's cassock

4. It is said that women are like clothes and brothers are like brothers. Looking back, I actually ran around naked for the whole year!

5. Since I turned into a piece of shit, no one dares to step on my head.

6. You can live like a pig, but you can never be as happy as a pig!

7. People always make mistakes, otherwise the right path will be overcrowded.

8. It will be great when the hardware can also COpY!

9. Do you think I will watch you die? I'll close my eyes!

10. Reduce the number of boys behind each girl to the first name!

11. Exercise your muscles to prevent getting beaten!

12. I want to fall in love early, but it’s too late

13. The sun rises in the east and rains in the west. The teacher is ruthless and I am affectionate.

14. I love you! What does it have to do with you?

15. In bed, practice is the only criterion for testing skills.

16. Hugging is really a strange thing. They are so close but can’t see each other’s faces.

17. Beijing University of Science and Technology deceived me for four years of college, so I plan to use the knowledge that Beijing University of Science and Technology taught me to deceive society for the rest of my life!

18. Friends around me, please become famous quickly so that my memoirs can sell well.

19. Housing prices are getting higher and higher, so good men are getting better and better. Come less and less

20. I have been really busy recently, and it is even difficult to guarantee 16 hours of sleep a day

21. Rock, paper, scissors, whoever loses will take off his pants~

22. If replying was a virtue, then I would have become a saint long ago.

23. Life cannot be like cooking. Have all the ingredients ready before putting it into the pot.

24. Wear other people’s shoes, go your own way, and let them find it.

25. There is an old legend that says that people who see beautiful women on the campus of Peking University will live forever

26. I am a beast when I take off my clothes, but when I put on clothes I'm a beast in disguise!

27. Your ugliness has nothing to do with your face

28. There are two ways to pollute a place: garbage, or money!

29. You look so creative and live so courageously!

30. The types of animals are decreasing, but the types of humans are increasing?

31. The sunrise only needs to appear before sunset, and the class only needs to arrive before get out of class ends. Non-mainstream classic quotes from the end of the world

Don’t always remember, but learn to leave the bitter tears to your past self.

Don’t be hypocritical with me, I’m too lazy to be perfunctory.

Loneliness is no longer able to resonate with human emotions.

It’s just that love comes too suddenly, sweet and a little crazy

When you love someone very much, when you think of it, it’s not warm, but hot.

You are in pain and you are helpless, all because you are too greedy and naively want to keep everyone.

Your heart is still there, I am willing to wait for you

When it comes to the feeling of love, don’t just look at the part you want to see.

Memories are a gift but also a natural enemy, causing endless tears

It’s hard to look back, but it’s worth remembering.

Instead of praying for a dull life, it is better to pray for a stronger life.

I said to God: "Let there be happiness." So you were born.

One good memory can offset many bad ones!

You are like the clouds in the sky. I can see you, but I cannot hug you.

Today is the tomorrow you were worried about yesterday, and everything will be fine.

I believe that the most lies a person tells in his life is when others ask: "What's wrong with you?" but you bravely say: "It's okay."

It is a bad habit to expect everyone you meet.

How many sighs are needed to evaporate a drop of tear? Who understands me?

I can’t afford some people, so I don’t want them.

You are like the rolled-up pages of a book, which look annoying but are reluctant to tear them off

As long as you confirm with one look, my love is meaningful

Happiness is the encounter between a wasted soul and love

It’s not that I don’t talk much, I just feel that half a sentence is too much without speculation

You can’t change yesterday, but if you worry too much about tomorrow, you will Would ruin today.

Sometimes I really miss you and it makes my heart hurt.

In life, you will always offend some people. Those who love me and those who hate me, please carry on.

Apart from people, what else is left in this city.

You can doubt me most of the time, except when I say I love you.

Beauty is an obsession, I insist, you can do whatever you want.

Life always waxes and wanes with each other, half to the sun and half to the backlight.

Completeness does not necessarily mean perfection, but a world with imperfections is considered complete.

Only when you have nothing can you enjoy freedom.

True love is an embrace after passion retreats.

Change is actually very simple, what is not simple is to make a breakthrough

If you have not experienced my journey, please do not criticize the path I take.

Time is the longest distance.

Some love has to be separated at the end of the world.

The words you once said were blown away by the wind.

What you can't forget is not a certain person, but your loneliness. Funny non-mainstream classic quotes on the Internet

1. If you don’t want to be your guest, you will be your prisoner. Love is a fight to the death anyway.

2. What makes me sad is not that you are not here, but that you are everywhere.

3. I was quite mean when I was young, and I am quite young now.

4. The drama you acted is so real, how can I believe it?

5. Most beautiful women are similar, but ugly women are different.

6. There may be several women in the world who don’t eat, but there is not even one woman who is not jealous.

7. Some people have a strong aura that makes people want to be strangers to them for the rest of their lives.

8. The bad news is that you’ll get a hair out of the pepper and egg rice bowl. The good news is, it’s not rolled.

9. We are walking too fast, and our souls can’t keep up. On.

10. You can see the words I type on the screen, but you can’t see the tears I shed on the keyboard.

11. When I lack fighting spirit in life, I really want a love rival to appear out of the blue to show off.

12. As a thin person who once fully understood how to eat without getting fat, now I finally fully understand the feeling of getting fat as soon as I eat.

13. I am a perfectionist and will not clean the room until it is thoroughly dirty.

14. If I hadn’t persuaded myself, I would have fallen out with the world a long time ago.

15. I can’t see clearly when my voice is hoarse, so could you please speak louder if I am affected?

16. Don’t think that I am a cynical little ruffian. In fact, I am a deep and affectionate liar.

17. I have a habit of putting a dagger on the bedside table before going to bed, just in case someone comes in in the middle of the night and can’t find the knife to stab me.

18. If beauty is a letter of recommendation, then kindness is a credit card

19. Don’t look back, I only love your back.

20. You are all the flowers of the motherland. I will pinch every one I see.

21. Look at you! Looking at the back can scare thousands of troops, and turning around can scare away millions of lions.

22. Your husband has gone to bed elsewhere and you are forced to get out of bed.

23. If you were a flower, no cow would dare to poop in the future!

24. A woman who pretends to be better than that is called capital, and a man who pretends to be better than that is called perversion

25. The biggest drawback in life: beauties are old and heroes are bald.

26. You keep your secrets, but I keep you. My love.

27. There are no free pies in the sky, but there are free bricks.

28. The tongue lasts longer than teeth, and software lasts longer than hardware.

29. My wife said she wanted to see lightning, so I used a kitchen knife to chop the wires.

30. I even believed the advertisements. You must be stupid by reading!

31. I think you can explain those deep feelings clearly.

32. Human life is like shit. Sometimes you have worked very hard but all that comes out is just a fart.