Humorous self-introduction

When you are in a new environment, self-introduction is essential. Self-introduction is an important means to make new friends. So what kind of self-introduction is appropriate? Here are six humorous self-introductions I have compiled for you. Welcome everyone to learn from them, I hope it will help you.

Humorous self-introduction article 1 1 1980 Made in China, length 178cm, net weight 66kg. Using artificial intelligence, all parts are complete and the operation is stable. After more than 20 years of operation, it is a reliable product. The "product" has complete procedures and can be returned indefinitely. Now because of the development needs, we are looking for like-minded people. Please contact us if you are interested!

2. I'm not bad, except for being handsome, I have no shortcomings! I sometimes feel that I am not very handsome. But one day, I was surrounded by a group of girls. They said I was handsome, but when I denied it, they hit me and called me hypocritical.

3. What kind of person am I? Once there was a girl who wanted to go to the grave with me-"If you don't pay me back, I will die with you!" " Once there was a girl who met me in my next life-"I want to pursue my next life!" " "There was once a girl who was willing to die for me—"I'd rather die with you! " "Visible how much you love me.

4. I am a man; Xx altitude, unmarried! Good health, loyal from generation to generation, no bad hobbies, strong communication skills, cheerful personality and helpful! It's an honor to meet you today, and I'm sure you feel the same way! I come from beautiful xx. There are beautiful mountains and beautiful water. I can take you to see them when I have the chance. As for the beauty of people, I believe everyone has recognized it now. Finally, I hope you have time to come to my dormitory for tea. I live in xx, but I forgot to mention it. My name is xx. Thank you!

5. Hello, my name is Zhang Xiaofeng. I am a boy. I believe you can see that I am 19 years old. I come from Chongqing. You know, to be honest, Sichuan was originally a small part of Chongqing, but for some reason we don't want it in Chongqing. thank you

6. I am plain, so I won't go into details here. I deeply feel my kindness, so I firmly believe that good people are rewarded. Because of my unintentional charity, I have won many friends. I feel that this is a gift from heaven, but occasionally I feel heartless, especially when I see beggars with sound limbs and strong bodies, I try to pretend not to see them. As a boy, I am very proud, very proud, and I have gone too far. Maybe I'm thick-skinned, so I'm proud. I can't let my face get a little hurt.

7. I am not tall, thin, ugly or fat. Walking on the streets of Paris does not affect the city appearance. It won't make other boys happy. Husband has butterflies in his stomach. There is no distinction between high and low academic qualifications. Can basically understand the English instructions of refrigerator. But it won't be boring to study philosophy, discuss special relativity or whether humans can move to Mars and worry too much. Generally speaking, this stock is competitive, and it is a dark horse among potential stocks, which deserves close attention and attention from gentle and considerate male investors. Thank you for your cooperation! There is no relevant area or scenic spot information for the time being!

8. I am a college student who is about to enter the society. Years of college life have made me such a versatile person with all-round development in morality, intelligence, physique, beauty and labor. Near graduation, I will report my academic achievements in recent years to those who care about and love me as follows: I have learned to cook: instant noodle technology is first-class dormitory 3 13. I learned to use computers: I can switch computers skillfully, and I am especially good at playing online games. There are almost no opponents in the whole college. I have learned many foreign languages: I know that I should use "Missy Missy" (Japanese) for eating, "Pig" (English) for swearing, and "Kill your aunt" (Russian) for saying goodbye to my friends.

9. I am a Jianghu girl who is loved by everyone, loved by flowers and fascinated by cars. I am known as the jade-faced little white dragon, and I am handsome, charming, educated, tall and powerful, with millions of fans.

10. I have no advantage. The only advantage is that I have no shortcomings. The biggest drawback is that I only have advantages. If being handsome is a crime, then I have committed a heinous crime. If it is a mistake to follow the fashion, I have been wrong again and again; If cleverness should be punished, then I wouldn't get chopped up; If modesty is to be tortured, I can escape.

1 1. I am 23 years old and very handsome. I studied literature at the age of seven, practiced martial arts at the age of nine, and picked up girls at the age of 12. He knows everything about astronomy and geography above, but little about it below. Every time he goes out for a walk, he often comes back with a beautiful woman and a handsome guy jumps off a building. He is kind-hearted and helpful. When the primary school Chinese teacher explained the meaning of "handsome boy", I was puzzled. My deskmate secretly handed me a small mirror. I took a picture. Oh, I suddenly understood ... It is said that when I was born, there was a piece of auspicious cloud in the northern sky, which gradually drifted to my roof from far and near and became a word: handsome.

12. I am the most talented, handsome, graceful, biggest and most powerful person in the local area. I am known as the combination of beauty and wisdom, the embodiment of hero and chivalry, everyone loves me, I can do my best for the driver's master, and I can cross the master twice for the guests, hehe!

Do you know what they all look like? Look at me. Look at me. Do I look like that to you?

14. I have rough appearance, warm heart, moderate size and elegant style, and can be integrated with interior decoration. The components in the body are powerful and compact, and can withstand huge

The burden and pressure of life. Its key components are exquisite in design, stable in operation, high in efficiency, reusable and long in service life.

15. Hello, ladies and gentlemen. 199 1 domestic, length 170cm, net weight 68kg, artificial intelligence, complete parts and stable operation. After 23 years of operation, it is a trustworthy product and has obtained the international quality iso9002 certification. So far, I have lived alone in the boudoir and come out for several years. I still think kindergarten is the best place to mix. So I feel very educated and talented. There are only two things I can't do in my life: this and that. My home is basically ok, and I drive a Cadillac with 13 door. As soon as I heard the sound, I knew it was a good machine. It is imported from Germany. At first, half of Beijing was smoking black smoke. The traffic police shouted at me, "Elder Sun, stop the demon." . My hobbies can be divided into static and dynamic. Static is sleeping, dynamic is turning over. But I also like e-sports, sports and making friends all over the world. My motto in life is: Dream, anything is possible. Let's not talk here for a while,

16. Hello, my name is xx. I just turned half a hundred this year. I am honest and young, and I am a handsome boy. Although I wear two pieces of glass, I am still handsome, which shows that I am very wise. I have rich experience. I used to be an honorable people's teacher. I am a big man of 1 m 79, a little shorter than Yao Ming, but half as tall as Pan Changjiang. Now, I am doing it work, but I have never been kicked by others, because I won't have shadow feet. Little brother, I'm new here, please take care of me.

17. I look like Pan An, I'm better than Guan Yu, I outsmart Kong Ming, I know astronomy, I know geography, I speak in words, I write in words, I know Yin and Yang, I know gossip, I know special things, I know evasion, I'm a great hero, I'm a great swordsman, I'm a great master, I'm a landslide, I'm a flood.

18. My nickname on earth is Li Fei. My age is a secret. I guess my height and weight, but I have many hobbies. I am not tall, short, thin, beautiful or ugly. Now I live on the third planet of the Milky Way solar system in the four-dimensional space of the universe. Please give me more advice!

19. My name is Weibaba, my height is1.8m, my age is 28, my gender is not 38, and my annual salary is 48,000. The foundation of my house is being stripped, and I only need to support one father. I wonder who will marry?

20. I am a super net worm in the universe. You are welcome to hit me, scold me, scold me, hit me, kick me, hit me, even cook me, fry, fry, stew, braise in soy sauce, steam, dry, cook me ... I have no complaints, but only if this person is the most famous in the world.

2 1. Poor is ugly, 1.49 meters. Primary school culture, rural hukou. There are three broken houses and an acre of wasteland. Cold pot and hot stove, my wife didn't. All the year round, the medicine never leaves the mouth. Go online today and recruit a girlfriend. On the road of revolution, let's join hands!

22. Male, born in xx (his real age is never concealed), has no marriage history, and now lives in xx. I am cheerful and sincere, and have no bad hobbies (smoking, occasionally having a drink with friends, but at most 5 bottles of beer; ), good health, normal function of all parts. Xx people in xx province. There are two sets of tile houses at home, and there is no car. Career needs development.

Humorous self-introduction 2 ● I am a man, but I am not a woman. XX years old, XX meters high-wearing shoes, temporarily unmarried. The key undergraduate course-not accepted, ordinary undergraduate course-is a little short, so we can only mix a specialty. However, my performance is still brilliant-I was a monitor in primary school and now I am a white-collar worker-I wear a white shirt and work in a multinational company-I clean the table in a chicken, but the salary is not bad-I can get a full 800 yuan if I don't arrive late or leave early). I have a house-I have to pay rent every month, a car-an environmentally friendly non-motor vehicle, and a passbook. Now I want to find a slim, beautiful, gentle, lovely, sensible, talented and capable wife, such as Bill Gates' youngest daughter and Buffett's granddaughter. What's that guy laughing at? I know you want to fart, don't you just want to say that I am a swan and want to eat clams-frogs? What happened? We are too kind! Donate all your kindness. Wow! Who else has banana skins? I'd better not talk about it. Besides, if the brick comes, you have to shoot me! Thank you! Funny self-introduction 2:

I keep a low profile. When have you ever heard me talk about my past brilliant deeds?

I am the most honest person and have never told a lie-except this time.

You all know my gender, my name, my age, my hobbies, needless to say, my specialty, eating! Funny self-introduction 3:

Today is my first day in primary school, and I am very happy. My name is Li Xiaoniu, my father is Li, and I live in the village. There are two buildings, three cars, four game machines and five televisions in my home. I have two mothers, one sleeps with me and the other sleeps with my father. Whoever is my good friend, I'll treat him to the new Kende duck in the county.

My father's surname is Hu and my mother's surname is Tu, so my name is Hu, but I'm not confused at all.

My father's surname is Qiu and my mother's surname is Yin, so I don't need to introduce my name. Funny self-introduction 4:

My name is Chen, and I am a famous fish. Because I was so ugly, I once looked up and scared all the swallows in the sky, so I got a nickname, Luo Yan.

My name is Wu Dashan, a chef, and I cook in Rourou Hotel. If you want to find me, just shout "Chef Wu Dashan" at Rourou Hotel and I'll come out.

My last name is Chen. I'm a baker. I don't know why, but recently everyone mistakenly thinks I'm a photographer. Funny self-introduction five:

My name is Wei Baba, I'm one meter eight, twenty-eight, my gender is not thirty-eight, and my annual salary is forty-eight thousand. The foundation of my house is being stripped, and I need to support my father. I wonder who will marry?

My name is Li You, and I like to rob oil. I drank in the hotel and left when I was drunk.

My name is Madahao. I have mung bean eyes, a flat nose and a big mouth. My horse has a lot of sexy pockmarked faces. I am good at boxing, taekwondo, martial arts, karate, Xiao Li throwing knives and fighting dragons with eighteen hands? I know who is handsome in today's game. I won all the championships, but this is what I need. Look at the handsome guy post, that is to say, what about you? Do you think you are handsome or I am handsome? A speech, also known as a speech, is a manuscript that expresses one's views, opinions and opinions at meetings or other public occasions. The quality of the speech directly determines the success or failure of the speech. The speech is as clear and logical as the argumentative paper, but it is not an ordinary argumentative paper. This is a practical style with propaganda and incitement. It often uses various rhetoric and artistic techniques, and has a strong appeal. Speeches are not often used. Many famous speeches are improvised and handed down by others through records. However, for important speeches, it is best to prepare speeches in advance, because speeches have at least two functions: First, through careful thinking and careful organization of materials, the contents of speeches are more profound and coherent. Secondly, it can help the speaker eliminate the tension and fear on the spot and enhance the speaker's self-confidence. The characteristics of speech are mainly different from speech, performance and composition. First of all, speech is a social activity in which the speaker expresses his views directly to the audience through oral language on certain occasions on some meaningful things or problems that people are generally concerned about. Secondly, the composition is that the author outputs information to the readers unilaterally through the article, while the speech is that the speaker exchanges information with the audience in two directions on the spot. Strictly speaking, a speech is a triangular information exchange between the speaker and the audience, and between the audience and the audience. The speaker can't be satisfied with conveying his thoughts, feelings and emotions, but must be able to control the reaction and communication between himself and the audience and between the audience.

Therefore, the manuscript prepared for the speech has the following three characteristics:

The main feature is to be targeted first.

Speech is a social activity and a form of publicity used in public places. In order to explain the audience, impress the audience and "conquer" the masses with thoughts, feelings, examples and theories, it must be realistic and targeted. The so-called pertinence, first of all, is that the questions raised by the author are the concerns of the audience, and comments and arguments must have eloquent logical power, be accepted and convinced by the audience, in order to produce the social effects they deserve; Secondly, it is necessary to understand that the audience has different audiences, different levels, and different types of "public places", such as parties, professional meetings, service clubs, schools, social organizations, religious groups, and various competition occasions. When writing, we should design different speech contents for the audience according to different occasions and different objects.

Second, it can be said. The essence of speech lies in "speaking" rather than "doing", with "speaking" as the main part and "doing" as the supplement. Because the speech has to be spoken orally, it must be based on the premise of good presentation. If we say that some articles and works are mainly appreciated through reading, and we can understand their meanings and feelings, then the requirement of the speech draft is "catchy". A good speech is very important to the speaker; It should be nice to the listener. Therefore, after the speech is written, the author had better check it by trial or meditation. Anything you can't say clearly or hear clearly (such as the sentence is too long) should be revised and adjusted.

Third, it is inspiring. Speech is an art, and a good speech has its own agitation, which can stimulate the mood of the audience and win good feelings. To achieve this, we must first rely on the richness and profundity of the ideological content of the speech, the incisiveness, originality and thought-provoking of the viewpoint, and the vivid, vivid and infectious language expression. If the speech is bland and uninspired, the effect will not be good, or even counterproductive, even if you "hit" hard on the spot.

Fourth, honesty. The speech draft cannot complete the speech task independently, it is only the written basis of the speech and an integral part of the whole speech activity. The subject, audience and specific time and space conditions of the speech are isomorphic, which constitutes the whole speech activity. When writing a speech, don't be divorced from the whole.

Therefore, the following aspects should be paid attention to in the writing of speeches:

First of all, according to the audience's cultural level, nature of work, living environment, taste, hobbies and wishes, we should establish topics and choose ways of expression in order to communicate better. Secondly, the speech should not only fully reflect the unique and profound views and opinions of the speaker, but also design and annotate the use of tone, speech speed and body language to achieve the best communication effect. In addition, we should also consider the time, space and atmosphere of the speech to strengthen the live effect of the speech.

Fifth, spoken English. Pragmatics is an important aspect that distinguishes speeches from other written articles and conference documents. Needless to say, written articles, other meeting documents, such as meeting work reports and leaders' speeches, don't pay much attention to oral English. Although it is read on the stage by a certain leader, the audience usually has a printed speech, and there is nothing they can't understand while listening to the lecture. Speech is different. It is so impromptu that it is impossible to print out the speech in advance and send it to the audience. Therefore, the speech must pay attention to "catchy" and "catchy". The so-called catchy, is to speak fluently. The so-called ear means that it sounds smooth, there is no language barrier, and there will be no misinterpretation.

Specifically, we should: change long sentences into short sentences suitable for listening; Change the inverted sentence into a normal sentence; Change or delete words and idioms you don't understand in classical Chinese; Turn monosyllabic words into disyllabic words; Change uncommon words into common words; Change words that are easily misunderstood into words that are not easily misunderstood. Only in this way can it be catchy and sound clear. Sixth, the live speech activity is a face-to-face communication between the speaker and the audience. The audience will respond to the content of the speech in time: either agree or disagree, or be interested or indifferent. The speaker can't ignore the various reactions of the audience. Therefore, when writing a speech, we should fully consider its existence and pay attention to leaving room for expansion and contraction on the premise of ensuring the integrity of the content. We should give full consideration to all kinds of problems that may arise during the speech and the countermeasures to deal with all kinds of situations. In short, the speech should be flexible and reflect the necessary field control skills.

The main function is first, "making people know" remarks. This is a speech, whose main function is to convey information and clarify things. Its purpose is to make people know and understand. For example, the aesthetician Zhu Guangqian's speech "On Writing" talked about the preparation before writing, the genre, conception and material selection of the article, which made the audience understand the basic knowledge of writing. It is characterized by strong knowledge and accurate language.

Second, a "convincing" speech. The main purpose of this kind of speech is to make people trust and believe. It developed from the "let people know" speech. For example, Yun's speech "How to Be a Good Man" not only tells people who are not good people, but also puts forward three standards to measure good people. Through a series of rational discussions, people's old ideas have been changed. Its characteristics are unique and correct views, detailed and conclusive arguments, and reasonable and rigorous arguments.

Third, an "exciting" speech. This kind of speech is intended to excite the audience, resonate with you in thoughts and feelings, and cheer for joy. For example, Martin Luther King, the leader of the American black movement, used several of his "dreams" in his speech in front of the Lincoln Memorial to stimulate the self-esteem and self-improvement of the majority of black audiences and inspire them to fight for "being born equal".

Fourth, "touching" speech. This is a step further than an "exciting" speech, which can give the audience an idea of acting with the speaker. Former French President Charles de Gaulle's speech "A Letter to the French People" in London during World War II called on the French people to take action and join the ranks of anti-fascism. It is characterized by strong incitement and often ends in a language of call and appeal.

Fifth, the speech of "making people happy". This is a speech, whose main function is to enliven the atmosphere, adjust the mood and make people happy. Mostly humor, jokes or teasing, usually appearing on festive occasions. There are many examples of such remarks, and people can hear them. It is characterized by material humor and language humor.

Humor self-introduction Chapter 3 ● I am a man, but I am not a woman. XX years old, XX meters high-wearing shoes, temporarily unmarried. The key undergraduate course-not accepted, ordinary undergraduate course-is a little short, so we can only mix a specialty. However, my performance is still brilliant-I was a monitor in primary school, but now I am a white-collar worker-I wear a white shirt and work in a multinational company-I clean the table in a chicken, although I clean the table, but the treatment is good-I can get a full 800 yuan if I don't arrive late or leave early). I have a house-I have to pay rent every month, and I have a car-an environmentally friendly non-motor vehicle. I want to find a slim, beautiful, gentle, lovely, sensible, talented and capable wife, such as Bill Gates' youngest daughter and Buffett's granddaughter. What's that guy laughing at? I know you want to fart, don't you just want to say that I am a swan and want to eat clams-frogs? What happened? We are too kind! Donate all your kindness. Wow! Who else has banana skins? I'd better not talk about it. Besides, if the brick comes, you have to shoot me! Thank you!

Humorous self-introduction Chapter 4 ● I am a very low-key person. When have you ever heard me talk about my glorious past?

I am the most honest person, and I have never said a lie-except this one.

You all know my gender, my name, my age, my hobbies, needless to say, my specialty, eating!

Today is my first day in primary school, and I am very happy. My name is Li Xiaoniu, my father is Li, and I live in the village. There are two buildings, three cars, four game machines and five televisions in my home. I have two mothers, one sleeps with me and the other sleeps with my father. Whoever is my good friend, I will invite him to eat the new Kende duck from the county.

My father's surname is Hu and my mother's surname is Tu, so my name is Hu, but I'm not confused at all.

My father's surname is Qiu and my mother's surname is Yin, so I don't need to introduce my name.

My name is Chen, and I am a famous fish. Because I am so ugly, I once looked up and scared all the swallows in the sky, so I have a nickname, Luo Yan.

My name is Wu Dashan, a chef, and I cook in Rourou Hotel. If you want to find me, just shout "Chef Wu Dashan" at Rourou Hotel and I'll come out.

My last name is Chen, and my name is Guan. I am a baker. I don't know why. Recently, people mistakenly think that I am a photographer. Funny self-introduction five:

My name is Wei Ba, my height is1.8m, I am 28 years old, my gender is not 380, and my annual salary is 48,000. The foundation of my house is being stripped, so I need to support my father. I wonder who will marry?

My name is Li You, and I like to rob oil. I drank in the hotel and left when I was drunk.

My name is Madahao. I have mung bean eyes, a flat nose and a big mouth. My horse has a lot of sexy pockmarked faces. I am good at boxing, taekwondo, martial arts, karate, Xiao Li throwing knives and fighting dragons with eighteen hands? I know who is handsome in today's game. I won all the championships, which is what I need. Look at the handsome guy post, that is to say, what about you? Do you think you are handsome or I am handsome?

Humorous Self-introduction Article 5 There is a man who is very handsome and knowledgeable. A man of great talent is educated, learned and knowledgeable. There is another person, eloquent, concise and insightful, who can always see through autumn, spare no effort to turn the tide, give his life to death and be selfless. There is also a person who holds the unparalleled martial arts and swordsmanship in hidden weapons, so he is extraordinary, and he is also an immortal and a sacred object. Every move. Do you know what they all look like? Look at me. Look at me. Do I look like that to you?

Humorous self-introduction Article 6 I am plain, so I won't elaborate here. I deeply feel my kindness, so I firmly believe that good people are rewarded. Because of my unintentional charity, I have won many friends. I feel that this is a gift from heaven, but occasionally I feel heartless, especially when I see beggars with sound limbs and strong bodies, I try to pretend not to see them. As a boy, I am very proud, very proud, and I have gone too far. Maybe I'm thick-skinned, so I'm proud. I can't let my face get a little hurt.

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