Who has a brain teaser script for Love Apartment 2?

1, Zhang Wei: Now the raw rice has been cooked into porridge!

2, Xiaoxian: I really didn't know it on purpose, you can format me!

3. Yifei: You must call me online tonight, otherwise, I will write your name on the tablet.

4, Youyou: Please, such an old film, you archaeology!

5. Zi Qiao: Are you still smart? You are a personal name!

6. Zhang Wei: I never eat chewing gum. I can't swallow it.

7. Xiaoxian: I want to eat my stomach when I pull it out.

8. Xiaoxian: In the past, advertisements were inserted in TV dramas. As soon as the advertisement came out, all the audience went to the bathroom. It's a good thing that TV dramas are inserted in advertisements now. As soon as the opening song came out, everyone went to the bathroom!

9, delivery: the same is the end of the world sausage mouth, why rush to fry!

10, Yumo: I'm allergic to time!

1 1, Yifei: As the saying goes, Rome wasn't built in a day, except in the microwave oven!

12, Zi Qiao: I am willing to repay everything with my feelings, including my body!

13, Yifei: If you want to live a good life, you must bring some green ~!

14, Zi Qiao: According to her cooking level, there are bugs in the dish and wires in the fan!

If Conan were alive, he would be angry with Richard Moore!

16, Guangu: You talk to them until midnight every day, how can they have time to create human beings!

17, Zhang Wei: I was the third runner-up in judo in the summer camp of law school, and I almost became the third runner-up in the last session!

18, Youyou: Quarrel is bad behavior ... Let's fight!

Riding a white horse is not necessarily a prince, but also a Tang priest ... It is not necessarily a monk who can burn incense, but also a panda ... It is not necessarily a bad person who has tattoos, and it is not necessarily a big bird who can fly, but it may be Li Ning.

The classic line in ipartment: Wan Yu: The little dragon girl was raped. Guangu (crazy): Nani (what)? ! That will be a day! Wan Yu (smiling): Yes, it was Yin Zhiping. (Continue to be angry): Stop it! Stop talking about it.

Yifei: I really want to put my size 37 shoes on your size 42 face now! A vegetable can speak better than you. Do you believe it or not? I'll plant you in a flowerpot now! !

Ipartment's classic line: Yifei: Never mind, failure is success. Damn Zhan Bo: I already have many mothers, but none of them are pregnant.

Zi Qiao: Huh? This cup has no mouth! Meijia: You're holding the cup backwards. Joe (upside down): Not only has no mouth, but also has no bottom.

Meijia: My aunt came to see me early, and now my waist is very sour and my stomach is very uncomfortable. Guangu: Meijia, your aunt is so kind to you. Otherwise, she will sleep in my room and I will sleep on the sofa today. Wan Yu: Guangu, what you said about my aunt is different from what she said about Guangu: Oh, does Meijia have many aunts? Your grandmother is really fertile. I only have one, but I have three young aunts!

The classic line in ipartment: Wan Yu: Did you pass the GRE? Passerby: I ... have no aunt Wan Yu: What about TOEFL? Passerby: Thank who?

Wan Yu: Ugly, but ugly is special, just ugly!

Zhan Bo: Sister, if someone hurts you deeply, how long will it take you to forgive him? Yifei: Forgive him? Forgiving him is God's business. My task is to send him to God!

Zi Qiao: I also want to find a place to print my head on money. Meijia: It's not difficult. Why don't you find a place where you can print money?

Guan Gu (singing): Long Long, you are two years behind, forever and ever ... Guan Gu (singing): I am not a locust, I am not a centipede, I just want a base brother, perfect love ... Yifei: you are shameless, despicable and unreliable!

Ipartment's classic line: Wan Yu: Dog biscuits are rich in conditioner and anti-dandruff formula. After eating them, the hair disappears without a trace and dandruff is more prominent!

Yifei: Did your mother throw people away and raise the placenta when she gave birth to you?

Zi Qiao: Don't be lazy with me, I'm too lazy to compete with you! Meijia: If you have a caesarean section, I will ... I will clean the floor again. ...

Xiaobo: I have been divorced for three years, and my son is half a year old.

Ipartment's classic lines: Passers-by: Eat sesame cakes, eat beer lids, eat wonton, eat mothballs, pat flies on your nails, go to Qingsongguan to burn incense, and your mobile phone falls into the merit box and can't be taken out.

Sister Flash: Canned sardines are more promising than you! Sister Flash: There is not enough money, the actors are undecided, and the script is temporarily unavailable.

Yifei: I don't think it is reliable at all. China won the World Cup, almost as outrageous as you!

The classic line in ipartment: Lisa: It's you! Ceng Xiaoxian! Ceng Xiaoxian: You know me? Lisa: My classmate's cousin's neighbor and your brother-in-law's cousin are in-laws! Lisa: (pointing to Ceng Xiaoxian's face) It's not the software. You should change the monitor!

Ceng Xiaoxian: Hello, everyone, I am your new Xiaoxian and good friend. ...

Ipartment classic lines: Zi Qiao: That was when I was in high school. One day I dreamed that I was taking an exam, and then I was awakened. Something even more terrible happened. It turns out that I am really taking an exam!

Guangu: Isn't The Promise a romantic film? Zi Qiao: Ha! I can't understand the movie at first sight! ... The Promise is a horror movie!

The classic line in ipartment: Joe: At that time, the sky was still blue and the water was green. There is no bird flu in chickens and ducks, and pork can be safely eaten. At that time, you had to wear clothes to take pictures, and you had to pay back your debts. The mother-in-law doesn't want to marry her daughter, and the father of the child ... is also very clear.

The classic line of ipartment: Yifei: Zhan Bo and I used to be conjoined babies. Before the age of two, our brains grew together. Fairy: Yes, and then the doctor gave Zhan Bo all his brains with a sharp knife.

Zhanbo: Let's start with five "Rape Flower Chicken"! Wan Yu (to the waiter): Then we'll take five copies of Rape Chicken Rice Flower and one copy of Fei: Two prodigies, which is Violence Chicken Rice Flower. Expo: Oh, really, changed its name?

Episode 1: Xiaoxian: Xiaoxian has such a roommate. He lives in two suites in the same apartment with a girl. It's a pity that one always goes to the left and the other always takes the elevator. Joe: It's Chen Yuanyuan, and you? Chen, Ping, Ping!

The first episode: Bus Master (to Zhan Bo): You are a pervert. You either swipe your card, put in coins, or get out of here. What are you twisting? Bus master (to bodyguard): Hey, come back! Either swipe your card, put in a coin or get out. what are you reading? (Bodyguard gets off the bus) You can't afford a car, and you pretend to be the matrix, huh!

Ipartment has a brain teaser.

1. Question: Why don't polar bears eat penguins? Answer: Because polar bears are in the North Pole and penguins are in the South Pole.

2. Question: If Ceng Xiaoxian climbs a tree to pick melons, he can pick one every minute, but if he doesn't pick ten, two will fall. How many can he pick a day? Answer: 0, cantaloupe doesn't grow on trees, and Ceng Xiaoxian has short legs and can't climb trees.

3. Question: If there is a car, Xiaoming is driving, and Xiaohong and Xiaohua are sitting behind, then who is the owner of the car? Answer: If

Question: There are four fingers sticking out, so what are these four fingers called bending? Answer: Wonderful.

5. Question: What turtle walks on two legs? Answer: Ninja Turtles

6. Question: What kind of dog walks on two feet? Answer: Snoopy.

7. Question: What cat walks on two feet? Answer: Hello Kitty.

8. Question: What duck walks on two feet? Answer: Every duck walks on two feet.

1. Question: Who is a person who always uses you to be responsible for him but he is not responsible for you? Answer: banks.

2. Question: When a sow crosses the river, the river can bear 500 kilograms. The sow weighed 300 kilograms, but when she reached the middle of the bridge, the bridge collapsed. Why? Answer: Because she drove across the bridge.

3. Q: Why didn't Hu Yifei die when he dropped from 6000m to1000m? A: Because she is a shareholder of China.

4. Question: What are the four lines that Friar Sand said the most in Journey to the West?

Answer: (1) Brother, the master was taken away by the monster. (2) Brother, the second brother was taken away by the monster.

(3) Second brother, the master was taken away by the devil.

(4) Big Brother, Master and Second Brother were all taken away by monsters.

5. Q: There are twelve kinds of medical pain. The first is the pain of mosquito bites, and the twelfth is the pain of pregnant women giving birth. So what is the thirteenth kind of pain? Answer: The pain of pregnant women being bitten by mosquitoes during childbirth.

6. Question: What animals can be attached to the wall? Answer: sealed

7. Question: The tortoise built a house in its shell and got in. Answer the name of a health care product? Answer: cover the middle cover.

8. Question: The tortoise tore down the house and built another house, then got in and answered the name of a health care product? A: The new cover is in the middle.

9. Question: It's the same turtle. He tore down the house, built another house, then got in and answered the name of a health care product. Answer: Super calcium.

10. Question: What is always relevant to you, but you can't see or find it when you need it? A: Relevant departments.

1 1. Question: There were four people playing mahjong in the room, and the police came and took five people away. Why? Answer: Because the person they play is called Mahjong.

12. Question: 26 letters. How many lETters are left after et left? Answer: 2 1, ET is an alien, they took the UFO away.

Love apartment 2 classic lines!

Freeze for three feet, you can't thaw it unless you are in the microwave oven.

Listen to other people's stories and shed your own tears.

What people want to cook is not a dish, but a wife.

Since ancient times, anyone who has not died has to die sooner or later ~

At least it's a man. He sounds like a little Shenyang.

Bet with me, not what you want, but what you have.

Two heads are better than one. Smells like Zhuge Liang.

The premise of thinking is to have a brain, right?

Money talks.

Down's performance rule one: don't give up the right to speak to your opponent. You must get more lines for yourself. The play was stolen.

Donne's performance rule 2: Never let the audience guess the development of the plot.

Rule 3 of Down's Performance: Create a sufficient background for the story, preferably involving the grievances of two generations.

……

Donne's performance rule 40: The audience will always expect more tangled character relationships and more interesting plots.

Face it, life is often much heavier than those idol dramas.

Killing rats with bare hands is more Donnie Yen than Jet Li!