How can I not entangle?

In senior three, there are always many students and parents who are nervous and anxious. When communicating with them, the word with the highest frequency is tangled. For example, some parents said, "Recently, they have been struggling with their children's grades, and they don't listen to her (his) advice." "I don't know what kind of school and major their children like, and he doesn't have a plan, so he is very entangled in volunteering." Some students say, "If you study hard all day, your grades will not improve, nor will you during the exam.". In less than a year, every time, different people are struggling, and so is the college entrance examination. They struggled before the scores came out. After the scores came out, the school's file promotion line has not come out yet. From now on, in the face of the 20 1 1 college entrance examination, some people began to struggle. In class, I once asked the students, "Have you ever struggled? "Almost everyone's answer is yes. I asked them how to explain the word "tangled". Their facial expressions are different, and it is difficult to make a reasonable explanation for this word. It seems that this word is a complex embodiment of people. If it is related to this word, there will definitely be trouble. Later, I told them that we can look at the word entanglement in this way: entanglement means spending half the time despising yourself and half the time forgiving yourself. When I despise myself, I see that I still have so many shortcomings. I tolerate my opinions and find that I still have the ability to realize my dreams. Don't give up my dreams easily, so time has passed and the problem has not been solved. So, if I want to say goodbye to the entanglement completely, I think I should do this: 1. Know yourself correctly: the biggest difficulty is to know yourself, and the easiest is to know yourself. Many times, we can't recognize ourselves, just because we put ourselves in a wrong position and give ourselves an illusion. Under this illusion, I went farther and farther, worked hard, and found that what I finally got was not what I wanted, or that I was getting farther and farther away from what I wanted, and I began to be anxious, impetuous and tangled. Therefore, we are not afraid of rough roads, and we are afraid that knowledge will go in the wrong direction from the beginning. Students' learning methods are not suitable for them, and the system set by parents for their children can't restrain them. Seeing that you are getting farther and farther away from your goal, or still keeping your distance, you must be entangled. After every big exam, I will meet some students and parents. As long as I feel tangled, most of the reasons are these. To know ourselves clearly, we should calm down and analyze ourselves, really examine ourselves, see if we know where we are wrong, or stick to it all the time, and see which roads we can't get through, or bury our heads in the cart but don't look up at the road. Look at your own mistakes, which are because you are too late and which can be avoided because you are afraid of difficulties? The so-called result is a portrayal of your usual efforts. Every cause has its consequences. If you are angry with yourself just because you didn't achieve the result, you might as well find the reason, improve yourself constantly and avoid the mistakes that have happened in the next stage, then you must be making progress. He who knows others is wise, and he who knows himself is wise. 2。 Build up confidence: Many people make great efforts to find out why they can't succeed in life. When they finally find the "culprit", they often find that it is their inner self-limitation that leads to failure. I remember when I was in high school, the slogan in front of the classroom was: all restrictions start from the heart of people. Anxiety before exams is due to lack of confidence and fear of failure, while parents' anxiety is due to lack of confidence in their children and fear of failure. Then we have a clear understanding of ourselves and try our best to be ourselves. Between doing well and not doing well, we have tried, summarized and tried our best, and found our own direction in practice. So what is the reason for the lack of confidence? 20 10 college entrance examination, there is a student in our class who usually gets good grades, that is, parents are not confident in their children, and children are not confident in themselves, and they did badly in the college entrance examination. 3。 We can only decide ourselves, not others, and don't always compare ourselves with others. If you base your happiness on the comparison with others, then your life may be full of regrets and dissatisfaction, because you have brought yourself into a bottomless pit, which will never end. In reality, some students feel that their grades are not as good as others, so they are dissatisfied with themselves and exclude others. When parents see that someone's children in their unit have been admitted to a famous university, they will secretly use their children to compete with others. In fact, what we have to do is to be the best of ourselves. In the right direction, we can make better use of our own resources and seize our own opportunities. Although we may lose to others at this stop, you will certainly surpass others in your life journey, because you have been doing your best and challenging yourself to the limit at all times. 4。 Rational judgment of people and things can be suspicious, but not indecisive. In the third year of senior high school, some students and parents can't judge things rationally, blindly follow the crowd, or are too firm in their own ideas. For example, during this year, some parents made decisions for their children blindly without judging what they and their children need, some parents downloaded information casually on the Internet, some parents let their children experience becoming so-called champions, some parents listened to some useless lectures and gave their children some wrong suggestions. In this case, you often confuse yourself and go to see a doctor. The problem of returning children is not only unsolved, but also a waste of time. It's strange that you don't struggle. Therefore, it is necessary to rationally analyze the problems encountered, and what is suitable is the best, and rationally judge what problems children encounter? You can refer to the suggestions of teachers and children. What resources do children need? Where can I get this resource? How to make rational use of resources? In the face of some tempting things, we can have skeptical thoughts, and we can verify our ideas through investigation and practice. The method is clear, the time allocation should be clear, and we must make a decision for ourselves. We must not be indecisive, it will waste opportunities and time. 5。 Have fun in the process. For parents and students who have passed the third year of senior high school, this year is actually a year full of memories, especially when they have achieved satisfactory results, the memories become even better. Then in this year, teachers' resources, parents' resources, information resources, their own resources, etc. It will make children walk better, especially parents, who have much more experience than children. It is a beautiful thing to share the sunshine, share the wind and rain, and work together to overcome the difficulties. However, in reality, there is always a parent who is full of complaints, disappointment and anxiety. Instead of playing a positive role, it is counterproductive. Because of things that I can't control and things that I can't decide, I always have to make decisions for my children and for them. For example, when it comes to study, I will open an ordinary class this year. Some children in this class have average grades, while those in that key class have good grades. They are all top students in key middle schools. Parents in key classes are very relieved to give their children to me, but parents in ordinary classes are not. Some parents can't wait to teach me. I have always said that I will try my best to manage their grades, but the parents of individual ordinary students are always involved in how to educate their children and teach them what to do. In fact, parents have not solved the problem of their children's grades for so many years. What's so funny about this? So you should calm down and analyze what you should do and what questions you should ask the teacher. Otherwise, the child will not make progress and the process will not be happy. Isn't it right in front of you? Senior three is also a test of children's life. The test is whether you can treat every gain and loss with a normal heart. After every gain and loss, there are new plans, new goals, and efforts towards new limits, rather than entanglement. In fact, every student and parents have a lot of time to adjust themselves, let themselves look at gains and losses rationally, analyze problems rationally, make plans for themselves rationally, and seize their own opportunities, then you will definitely get the ideal score. Never let your time and opportunity be wasted on unnecessary entanglement.